by Donna Alward
Stephen rose and put his napkin on the table. “No cigars for me, but I wouldn’t say no to a drink. Jacob?”
“Ugh.” Charlotte rolled her eyes. “Stephen, of all the times to play Lord of the Manor...”
He put a hand on her shoulder. “I am lord of this manor. And you are my sister. I’m just going to talk to him.” He gave a squeeze. “Seriously, he used to be Special Forces. I’m not that dumb.”
She couldn’t help it, she snorted, and even Jacob grinned. “It’s all right, Charlie. I’ll find you later.”
The two exited the dining room, leaving Charlotte sitting alone. She sighed. The last time Stephen had stepped into a relationship, it had nearly ruined everything. The situation with Jacob was tenuous enough without her brother’s interference.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
JACOB WATCHED STEPHEN CLOSELY, trying to get a read on his mood. He was definitely playing the protective brother, but Jacob didn’t sense actual hostility or opposition. Stephen seemed relaxed as he went to a cabinet and took out a bottle.
“Brandy or whiskey?” Stephen asked.
“Whiskey,” Jacob answered, and got a nod of approval.
Charlotte’s brother gave Jacob a run for his money on physical build. The man was tall and in excellent shape, which Jacob found a bit surprising considering Stephen ran a fashion company with his mother and had a title after his name. But then, Jacob had learned long ago not to put too much stock in stereotypes.
While Charlie had lovely brown hair, Stephen’s was almost black, and so were his eyes. It wouldn’t take much more than a glare from him to intimidate people. Well, most people, anyway. Not Jacob.
He took the glass Stephen offered and lifted it in a casual toast before taking a sip.
It was excellent. But then, he expected no less from the Pembertons.
“So. You and my sister.”
“I’m not sure how to answer that. Charlie and I haven’t really discussed what our relationship is or will be. Yet.”
Stephen gave a quick smile. “And I interrupted.”
Jacob didn’t answer, just lifted an eyebrow as they went to sit near the unlit fireplace. The whole room felt masculine to Jacob, and a way for Stephen to claim his dominance in the situation. Which made perfect sense to him. He was the outsider here; it was a position he was used to, so instead of making him uncomfortable, he felt in slightly familiar territory.
Stephen stared into his glass for several seconds before lifting his head and meeting Jacob’s gaze. “I’m not sure how much you know about me or our family. Or if Charlotte told you about her twin, William, and what happened last fall.”
“We haven’t discussed it.”
“I got in the way of my brother’s happiness and acted in a way I’m not proud of. I don’t want to repeat that mistake with Charlotte. At the same time, I’m her big brother, and I won’t see her hurt.”
“Having Charlie hurt is the last thing I want. She deserves to be happy.”
“And you think that’s with you?”
It was a fair question. Jacob took a gulp of whiskey and felt the burn straight to his gut. “Honestly, I don’t know. She’s a wonderful, rare woman, Stephen.” He wasn’t sure how much to reveal when he hadn’t even revealed his feelings to Charlie herself. “The pregnancy was accidental. But as we move forward, nothing can be accidental. I want to do the right thing, for her and for our child.”
“And is living in London while she’s in Paris the right thing?”
The questions were getting tougher. “I ask myself that ten times a day.”
Stephen fell silent, then sighed. “She loves you, you know.”
A jolt of shock raced through Jacob’s body and he sat forward. “She told you that?”
“She doesn’t have to. We all saw the difference in her when she came back from New York. Not bad changes, just different. And her face when she talks about you or tonight when she looked at you.”
This was news to him, and he wasn’t sure what to do with it. “We’ve been talking about how to co-parent together. To do what’s best for the baby. This weekend was supposed to be a time for us to really work that out.”
Stephen nodded, unsmiling. “Bear in mind that Charlotte has never brought a man to either of our family homes, Jacob. This is a big deal for her.”
“It’s a big deal for me.”
“Do you love her?”
He met Stephen’s gaze. “I’m not sure it’s your business if I do or not. I’m still...in shock.” He sighed. “And surprised you haven’t pointed out the fact that I’m not good enough for her.”
Stephen chuckled then. “Well, of course you’re not, I didn’t think it bore mentioning.” When Jacob bristled at the easy dismissal, Stephen waved a hand. “Listen, no one would be good enough for Charlotte. She’s scary efficient but has a heart of gold. She’d do anything for her family and never wants to cause trouble. I see all of those things. For her to step out and make something her own, like she did with the crisis in New York, was unusual and very much needed, in my opinion. And I’m guessing you had something to do with that.”
“Not really. I think it was in her all along. She just needed the crisis to make her rise to the occasion.”
“And what about you? Is this going to make you rise to the occasion, too? What are you willing to do to make Charlotte happy? To take care of your family? Because that’s what they are now, even if you haven’t put a ring on her finger.”
Jacob drained his glass. “You think I should ask her to marry me.”
“If you love her. And only if you love her. Otherwise, set up some kind of parenting agreement. But don’t give her false hope, Jacob. Her heart’s involved whether she wants it to be or not.”
Stephen got up to refresh their drinks, and after he had done so, he reached into his pocket and took out a small box. “I asked Maman and she agreed. This is our grandmother’s engagement ring. It is yours if you want to propose.”
Jacob reached out and took the box, opening the lid with a creak of the hinge. Inside was nestled a gold band with a stunning square-cut diamond in the middle, flanked by smaller diamonds in a fanciful pattern that looked like delicate leaves. “It’s beautiful.”
Then he thought of the butterfly necklace tucked into his duffel and his heart wrenched. What was he going to do? Marriage was so huge and would change his life irrevocably. But then...so would parenthood. His stomach went weightless as he realized after this weekend, nothing was going to be the same.
And he thought of Jacinta, and how he’d loved her, but how he didn’t anymore.
“You look like someone knocked the wind out of you,” Stephen observed, taking his seat again.
“Feels like it.” He looked at Stephen, still reeling from the offer of the ring. “Stephen, I grew up in a regular old suburb, and I never had a whole lot growing up. I don’t have a title, and even now I’m always on the outside of your world, even if I understand how it operates. That all being said, I hope you’ve offered this out of sentimentality and not because you think I can’t afford to get Charlie the ring she deserves. Because I can.”
“Hell, I know that. You don’t think we researched Wolfe Security before we hired you? I don’t give a damn if you were poor as a kid or if you know what fork to use. That’s rubbish. What I care about is my sister. The ring is yours if you want it.”
“I didn’t expect the support.”
“Mess this up and you’ll see how quickly that goes away.”
Jacob was starting to really like Stephen. They were a lot the same, despite the obvious differences. “Noted.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes, sipping their drinks, until Jacob turned his head and looked at Stephen. He looked so Lord of the Manor, and yet what Jacob saw was a big brother looking out for his sister. Jacob liked to think he’d have done the same, if he’d
had any siblings.
“She’s lucky to have you, Stephen.”
“Oh, I’m not so sure. I’m very, very flawed. But in this, I want to do right by her. She’s taken our father’s death hard, though she tries not to show it. It means something that she brought you here. Just talk to her.” He turned languid eyes on Jacob. “And remember, I meant what I said. You hurt her, I’ll mess you up. SAS or not.”
“If I hurt her, I’ll let you,” Jacob said, and they went back to their drinks.
* * *
When Jacob suggested a walk in the garden after breakfast, Charlotte was more than happy to oblige. She’d missed seeing him last night after he’d disappeared with Stephen, and had lain awake wondering what they’d talked about, worried at Stephen’s interference. But she hadn’t risen from her bed to find out. The thought of disturbing Jacob in his room was far too tempting and she had to keep a clear head.
A walk in the garden was perfect.
A spring shower through the night left sparkling droplets on the leaves and flowers, and the fresh scent of moist earth and grass. As they walked along the path, Jacob reached out and took her hand. Clearly Stephen hadn’t frightened Jacob away, and for that she was glad.
“The gardens here are so beautiful,” he said. “I don’t know the names of anything but the rosebushes, I don’t think.”
“The climbing vines with the light purple conical flowers? That’s wisteria. And the big blooms on that frame there, the deep purple and white ones? Clematis.” She pointed to her left. “And those showy pink blossoms are azaleas.”
“You like the garden.”
She nodded. “I do. When the verbena blooms, the butterflies go crazy for it. We have one section that is just florals that attract butterflies. Another that is all cutting flowers.” She led him to the right, and pointed out another shrub, this one with flowers of the palest pink. “One of my favorites, camellias. Because the flowers are perfection.”
“You’re right. There’s not one petal out of place.”
She was quiet for a moment, searching for the right way to change the subject. “I see you made it through the conversation with Stephen last night.”
“Your brother’s a good man. And he cares about you very much. Actually, seeing you here explains a lot.” They’d continued walking, but at a speed that could be considered only an amble. The morning sun felt glorious on her face. She had a baby growing inside her. Jacob was holding her hand. In a way, she wanted to hold on to this moment forever.
“Explains what?”
He shrugged. “You’re yourself here. It suits you. For all your busy job and lifestyle, you like the simple things. Like sun and flowers and meat pies.” He looked down at her and grinned. “Speaking of, breakfast settling okay?”
She nodded. “I do quite well with toast and tea.”
When he pulled her off the path to stand beneath a whispery willow, she didn’t resist. The grass was damp on her shoes, but she didn’t care about that, either. Jacob looked like he had something to say. “What is it? We never finished talking last night. I was thinking, maybe the easiest thing would be to decide on terms and then have an agreement drawn up.”
He reached for her other hand. “I think you should marry me.”
Charlotte’s whole body went numb. Marriage? When had that ever been on the table? She stared up at him, unable to speak, trying to sort out her thoughts. Elation at being asked, followed swiftly by dismay that he should propose because of the baby and not because of...love.
“I don’t understand. What did Stephen say to you?”
His gray eyes were serious as they plumbed hers. “A lot of things. Mostly I think he was trying to get at how I feel about you. And the truth is, Charlie, I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you.”
Just what she wanted, right? Then why was she more afraid than ever?
“In love with me? We spent a week together. And by your own admission, you’re still in love with Jacinta.” The way he winced as she said her name told her she was right. “Please, don’t propose out of obligation or some warped version of doing the right thing.”
He let go of her hands briefly. “Charlie, I’ve had to do a lot of thinking since I left you. And the truth is, I’m not in love with Jacinta. Not anymore. I did love her. Of course I did, or else it wouldn’t have hurt so much when she died. But I’ve been hanging on to that guilt for years. It’s kept me from moving forward. Until you. Until you, I was just kind of living a half life. Functioning but not really living at all.”
She frowned, torn between wanting to believe him and knowing words were easy but actions harder. “I can’t compete with a ghost, Jacob.”
“You don’t have to. Don’t you see? It was my guilt holding me back, not love. I used it to keep people at arm’s length. To not get involved. To not get hurt again. And then, at the airport in Paris... Well, walking away from you hurt. More than I ever expected.”
And then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a familiar box.
Panic raced through her limbs. She hadn’t expected this. Jacob wasn’t the type to make flowery declarations and pull out diamonds. Stephen had to have persuaded him. She wanted him to love her but...oh, God. She wanted to believe in it. But she didn’t. Because she knew without a doubt that if not for this baby, a proposal wouldn’t even have crossed his mind.
He opened the box and she saw her grandmother’s ring. Stephen had lied, then. He had known she was going to be here and came expressly for this purpose. She’d spent a lifetime doing the right thing for the family, and now that she’d finally broken free, the family wanted her to do the right thing for them again, didn’t they? A neat-and-tidy marriage to the father of her baby.
“Charlie, will you marry me?”
She took a step back. “Don’t be ridiculous. I—I can’t. You shouldn’t have asked. This isn’t what we agreed.”
His gray eyes widened, wounded. “Are you saying you don’t love me? That what we shared wasn’t real?”
The panic now felt like cold chills all over her body as she fought for breath. “So what if it was? It’s a big leap from there to marriage. This makes no sense! We don’t even live in the same country. And you... You willingly put yourself in danger! Are you willing to give all that up?”
“Are you asking me to?”
She didn’t know how to answer. To her shock, she was afraid he’d say yes, he would give it up. Then what would he do? “I can’t believe Stephen convinced you to do this,” she breathed, shaking her head.
Jacob snapped the box closed and shoved it back in his pocket. “I know my own mind,” he bit back. “Stephen may have given me the ring, but asking you was my choice. Because I thought we had something real. Because seeing you here, the way you kissed me yesterday, gave me hope. But I was wrong, wasn’t I? Because even after everything that happened in New York, even after doing all that you asked this week when you told me about the baby, you don’t trust me. And that’s not something I can fix. That’s something you have to do on your own. I’m not Mark, Charlie. I’m not after something, and I’m not your father. You’re not going to lose me when you still need me. But you need to believe that, and you don’t.”
“You want me to trust you, when you’re still hung up on Jacinta? You want me to believe you’re ready for a relationship just like that? That you’re ready for marriage? You say you won’t leave me, but you’re still determined to put yourself in danger in your job. Maybe this is just a chance for you to redeem yourself.”
His voice softened, and sadness darkened his eyes. “Don’t hide behind her because you’re scared. I lost the one I loved, who loved me, because she was taken from me. But at least I didn’t throw my chance away.” He shook his head. “I understand if you don’t love me. But I never imagined you’d be a coward.”
“That’s unfair.” She lifted her chin. “You want to know wh
y I don’t trust you? Because when I returned to Paris, Maman told me you’d told her about the email. When you said you wouldn’t.”
“I never said I wouldn’t. I said I wouldn’t send it to your IT team and instead I’d send it to mine. I never agreed to not tell your mother. She was my employer. But you go ahead and tell yourself that’s why because it’ll make you feel better.” His voice broke on the last word and he turned away.
“Jacob...”
He backed away, putting more distance between them. “I don’t want to fight with you. Draft up a preliminary parental agreement and I’ll have my lawyer look at it. I still plan to be a parent. I’m not abandoning you or my baby.”
And then he turned and walked away, leaving her with a heart filled with confusion and a mountain of regret.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHARLOTTE SAT IN numb silence. What on earth had happened this morning? One moment they were having a beautiful walk in the gardens and the next, everything had gone to pieces. She’d said things, horrible things, lashing out at him when he was right. She was scared. Terrified. Maybe if he’d eased his way into it, they’d talked, something... But she’d had no warning. No ability to prepare.
Now he was gone, without a word. Took his bag and got in his Land Rover and drove away, leaving her here with Stephen. They’d arrived together. For him to take off this way told her how very deeply she’d hurt him.
Perhaps that had been her first mistake. She hadn’t realized she had the power to hurt him. He’d seemed so invincible, but he was not, was he?
There was a tap on her door, and then Stephen poked his head in. “May I come in?”
