by Mia Luxe
If I can handle that, I can handle anything.
"Your turn, professor. What would you like? My mouth?”
He is still sitting, his cock standing straight up.
"Turn around," he says, and I do, letting him admire his work on my ass. The way he turned it bright red. It hurts more than any punishment he’s given me in the past, but the low, throbbing pain is an intoxicant for me.
He gently grabs my hips and pulls me back, positioning me above his cock with his arms around me. I lower myself onto him, moaning as I feel his rock hard cock head pressing into me. I let myself slide onto him in one delicious movement, my moans mixed with his grunt of pleasure as he slides deep into me.
My feet don’t even touch the ground and he lifts me up and thrusts me down on his dick over and over, pushing him so deep inside of me. It feels like I’m being impaled on his huge dick.
His right hand moves down to my clit, and I gasp in pleasure as he starts to circle his index finger expertly, sending lightning shocks of pleasure through me. I’m way too sensitive and I moan out so loud it makes my cheeks turn red. I want to beg him to stop, but I know he won’t unless I use the safeword and there’s no way I can let this end. A scream leaves my mouth as I cum too intensely, his cock way too deep inside of me.
He remembers that I get sensitive after I cum and stops circling his finger on my clit, but he only pulls me up and down faster and faster, his cock sending waves of pleasure through me. His hands grip my hips and he thrusts me up and down on his rock hard cock, fucking me like an animal. His hands grip me hard enough they will leave bruises as he rams me onto his dick over and over. The waves of pleasure of my orgasm last forever until he growls and his cock spurts into me, his seed filling me. I milk him for every drop as he pounds me onto his cock over and over, until finally he stops and his cock starts to soften inside me.
He holds me there on his lap, his cock still inside of me, and I can feel his seed deep inside of me. It feels so right to be full of his cum. He wraps his arms around me so tight and nothing can hurt me. I’m so protected.
When I trust my shuddering legs to hold my weight, I get up and make my way to the bathroom, holding my hand to myself to keep his seed inside of me.
As I’m in the shower it all feels so surreal.
My sex life up until I met Connor Bold was unfulfilling, amateur fumbling without need. Connor has drawn out the dark needs in me, the things I felt throughout my life and pushed them down, feeling too guilty to explore them.
As the warm but not quite hot water slides down my body, I contemplate it. I would never have told anyone else that I wanted them to force themselves on me. I would have felt too prideful and embarrassed to admit I wanted to be spanked.
Connor joins me in the shower, his muscular body pressing against me as we wash each other off.
My fingers instinctively move to his scars, tracing them from one to another.
"How did you get these?"
The faraway look in his eyes makes me sad, but I had to ask. In all the reports of the night he took down the Maturi family, there are only vague details, nothing concrete. I want to hear the real story.
"I got them from Joe Maturi. I got them because I stopped myself from killing him with my bare hands."
A chill goes through me, and I step out of the shower, my mind racing. I grab a towel and enter the bedroom, his words echoing through my mind. He joins me.
"You sure you want to hear it all?"
I nod. No matter what darkness lurks in Connor's heart, I need to know it.
"This didn't get on the official record. The official report is that the Maturi family changed the drop point of a major shipment of trafficked women. The official record says I was told the location, called my commanding officer, and the police force was able to save all one hundred souls. While this was happening, I was shot twice by Joe Maturi. After being shot, I managed to fight through the wounds and knock Joe out."
I nod. My mouth is dry. "And... and what really happened?"
He stands in front of me in only his towel. His eyes look angry. Two furious green orbs. It’s like he’s barely in the room anymore, he’s so caught up in the memories.
"I'd been working with them for two years, and I built up my trust with them. I was muscle. I was on the outskirts of their organization for a year and a half, proving myself, until they promoted me to head bodyguard for Joe himself. The heir to the Maturi family. Vicious, cruel, and without a conscience.”
His fist clenches, and he paces in the room.
“When I was promoted they were testing out an international supplier of women. Before that, Joe Maturi had to make trips up to Canada to get girls. Now they were going to ship them from Ukraine. The first shipment was five women. I could have saved their lives. Called my CO and shut down the shipment, put the Maturi’s and their associates behind bars. I didn’t save them. Those five women are gone… in a life of hell, because of me.”
His jaw clenches hard. He moves farther away from me, and I don’t think he even notices. He looks so weary.
“I made the devil’s choice. Joe told me that after the test shipment, if all went well they would get a hundred more women brought in a month later. If I brought in the law then and there, those hundred women would have been sold to the next highest bidder. I made the choice to sacrifice five women to save a hundred, and sometimes I wonder if I sold my soul doing it.”
Exhaustion paints his face and he sits down next to me. I run my hand down his thigh. I can feel his pain. He looks like he doesn’t even notice my hand.
“They suspected a rat. They got paranoid. The day of the shipment, they started to get nervous. They switched the location at the last minute. Only Joe Maturi and his father knew the new place. Once they landed on the docks, they would disappear forever, into the dark underbelly of society.”
He breathes in a huge gulp of air, and I know he’s about to tell me something that might change things forever.
He turns and looks me straight in the eye. His neck flexes.
“I beat it out of him. I beat him to a bloody pulp. He didn’t break easy. It took… it took time. I almost killed him. I almost murdered him.”
I’ve never seen Connor look so vulnerable.
“You had to, Connor. You had to save those girls.”
I say the words, but my mind rebels against them.
He tortured a man for information in cold blood! He almost beat a man to death! This man is dangerous!
“Maybe I had to. But I broke the law. I beat the location out of him, and sometimes I wish I killed him. He had a hidden gun. He gave me these souvenirs for my trouble.”
He looks down at the twin bullet wounds on his chest. Then his eyes meet mine and they are so foreign and brutish they make me go cold.
“That’s how I got my scars.”
I can’t think of anything to say, and he continues.
“I didn’t just break the law, Willow, I covered it up. All this… it could land me in jail. I shouldn’t be telling you this. I’ve needed to tell someone this, and you… I don’t understand it, but I trust you more than anyone I’ve ever met.”
He looks at me, his brows furrowing, like he doesn’t understand his own words.
“I get it. I trust you too, Connor.”
He nods. “My CO covered for me. After the girls got saved, I went through inquest after inquest, committee after committee. They could smell the corruption on me. They asked me what I did for the Maturi family, they grilled me down to the minute on how Joe Maturi got beat up that night. I stuck to my story. The story my CO helped me put together. And because of it, they are in jail, and I'm a dirty cop."
He stands, throwing his towel aside and pulling on briefs.
He just told me things that could land him in jail. He trusts me. I have to trust him.
I don’t know what to think. My mind flits back and forth, and I feel an intense danger emanating from him.
"That's how I got these s
cars. I got them because I beat a man three-quarters of the way to death and didn't finish the job.”
"No," I say, shaking my head. "You got them saving lives. Because of you, the Maturi family is in prison and a hundred women aren’t being used as sex slaves right now. Who knows what else you prevented those bastards from doing in the last five year when they’ve been trapped in jail.”
I don’t know how to feel. I’m two feet away from a man who is capable of hurting someone for information. It makes me feel sick in my stomach, but I know why he had to do it.
I’ll process how I feel later. For now, I need to switch the subject before I’m overwhelmed.
“I’m such an idiot Connor. I didn’t bring a change of clothes,” I say, knowing my workout clothes are in a sweaty heap in his gym. My beautiful Lululemon tights are ripped to shreds, in tatters on the floor.
Changing the subject lets him push the thoughts out of his mind. He shudders quickly, then puts on a smile as he looks me up and down. As his eyes enjoy my naked body, I can see the warmth returning to him. He leans forward and gives me a little kiss on my neck, then another on my ear.
My bottom twinges in pain. I forgot about it while he was telling me his story, but now the pain comes back with a vengeance.
“That was a harsh punishment,” he says, seeing the pain in my eyes. “Here, let me rub lotion on your.”
I smile and lay out on the bed, naked. His hands are magical. They rub soothing lotion into my aching bottom, the fire turning to a low burn. Then he moves his hands up and massages all the tension from my back, making me purr.
“This feels incredible,” I moan out. He finishes and I look around, trying to figure out what I can possibly wear. “Ugh, I’ve got nothing.”
“Too bad, you’ll have to stay naked.”
I push him gently. “You’re so much taller than me, I bet I could use one of your shirts as a dress.”
“Let’s try it,” he says, standing up. I enjoy the sight of his muscled bottom as he leans over and pulls out a black t-shirt from his drawer. I put it on, and it goes down halfway past my thighs.
“See! Told you.”
“Now that you’re dressed up, we better go out to a nice restaurant,” he jokes.
Him joking makes me feel normal again.
“I can’t fucking wait for Portland. It’s going to be amazing to be able to go out in public and do stuff and not care if anyone sees us.”
“You’re right Willow, I can finally get in all the wining and dining you deserve.”
When he says dining, my stomach grumbles. It loves to betray me at the most inopportune times.
“Ready to learn another dish?
“My stomach is. My brain still doesn’t believe I managed to make scallops without burning down your house.”
I follow Connor to the kitchen, and motions to a loaf of fresh crusty bread on the counter.
“How are you feeling grilled cheese?”
I smile, remembering the grilled cheese dinners when I was growing up.
“Let’s do it!”
Grilled cheese is simple enough that even I can confidently help slicing up the cheddar cheese. Soon grilled cheese sandwiches are sizzling on our plates. The first bite is delicious and cheesy.
“Mmm, this is so good.”
“We make a great team,” replies Connor after swallowing a mouthful.
In between bites, I quiz him on Portland.
“It’s an incredible city. We’ll get in tomorrow late, then we’ll have all of Saturday to explore. I give my talk Sunday morning, and I’ve arranged a guest pass for you.”
“A guest pass at the FBI. Wow.”
He smiles. “Front row seat.”
I finish half my sandwich, feeling a slight hint of embarrassment when I realize I’ve eaten it quicker than Connor has.
Slow down, Willow!
“What else will we get up to in Portland?”
Connor leans back. “All sorts of stuff. I want to show you this amazing bookstore they have. It takes up a whole city block. There’s also an awesome weekend market we can check out by the river.”
“Do they have a Lululemon store? Those were my favorite leggings you ripped up,” I say, giving him sad puppy dog eyes.
Connor laughs. “Ha! You’re more likely to find a hand-knit legging store in Portland. I’m telling you, this city is something else. Someone can have the idea that they want to make a broomstick store, and five years later, that store will still be open and running. No other city. I’d like to live there someday. I love the atmosphere, the coffee, the breweries, the bridges, everything about it just speaks to me.”
I nod quickly, pushing away my empty plate. “That’s the weirdest thing! I always pictured myself living in a city with bridges!
Connor cocks his head. “That is a very specific thing to know.”
I smile. “Yeah, right? There’s something about rivers, and bridges, and…” I trail off, feeling foolish.
“I get it. I feel the exact same way.”
My heart flutters.
I get to spend the entire weekend with Connor. Just me and him, exploring a city.
I stand up, grabbing our plates and turning the sink on to watch them.
“What are you doing?”
“Um, washing the dishes?”
He laughs. “This isn’t a dorm room! I’ve got a dishwasher, you know.”
“Oh, of course,” I say, feeling silly again. It’s hard to focus on anything when Connor is in the same room as me.
Connor stands, wrapping his arms around me and kissing me gently. I hold him tight, never wanting to let go.
A long sigh leaves me.
“What is it?”
“Ugh. I better get going. I don’t know how much longer I can keep our relationship secret! Shelly already saw the text you sent me.”
Connor breaks off the hug. He looks utterly non-plussed, no worry at all straining his face. He reaches out to the table to grab his glass of water.
He laughs. “Good thing you have me saved as Hot Guy and not Hot Professor.”
“You’re right, I have professor Gunterson saved as Hot Professor already.”
He laughs so hard he chokes on his water as we both picture 80-year-old professor Gunterson, the kindly old German professor.
I sigh. “I better get going. Call me a cab?”
“Sure.”
I wrap my coat around me, pulling it tight so it hides the fact I’m wearing a t-shirt underneath.
On the cab ride home, all I can think about is Portland.
The farther I get away from Connor, the more I feel like I’m going out of a daze. Like he puts an enchantment on me by his presence, and I can only think clearly when I’m away from him.
His story of how he got the bullet wounds is chilling.
I hurry into dorms. Shelly’s light is off. She’s a nightowl, so I know she’s sleeping over at her new guy’s place. I get in my pyjamas and lie in bed, wincing as my buttocks touch the hard surface of the dorm beds. I wish I could be in Connor's feather bed, but soon enough we will be in Portland together. Soon his strong arms will be wrapped around me.
Strong arms that he used to beat a man for information.
I shift back and forth under the covers. Is it all a stupid mistake? When I’m with Connor, everything feels so right. When I’m away from him and I let my doubts poison my mind, anxiety overcomes me.
I’ll be in Portland with a man who came this close to being a murderer.
You need to break this off. You need to break it off before you get hurt, and not just your heart breaking. The time he spent undercover changed him. He isn’t just the relaxed guy you want him to be, he’s something else.
Something dangerous.
I try to shake the doubt off in my mind, doubt that my instincts don’t want to believe.
No matter what he’s done, my body trusts him.
Caged Beasts
Connor - Friday, November 7th
My w
eekender bag is nearly full of clothes for the trip. I rehearse the lecture I’m going to give to the FBI in my mind as I pack. I reach for my laptop when it makes a “Bing” sound.
It’s an alert I set up for one specific reason. My heart pounds and my fists clench instinctively as I check my email. As I thought, there’s a new news article on the Time’s website. I look closer, my body tense.
Third murder in maximum security
The penitentiary is on lockdown after a third body is found. The body has been identified as Mark Garund, 58 years of age, who was serving a life sentence for murder. Police revealed that the cause of death was multiple stab wounds, consistent with two other deaths over the last two months.
Extra security cameras are being installed to combat what prison staff are calling “dark zones”, locations within the prison where they are unable to monitor.
Warden Dave Fields had the following statement.
“We are facing a funding freeze that has limited our ability to effectively monitor our violent criminal population. I implore our Governor to allocate funds for a new wave of prison guards and additional security. Our guards are currently at risk, pulling double overtime to monitor the situation. We ask any members of the public with information to come forward. We ask any inmates with information to share it with us.”
No guards have been harmed at this time.
Animals. Animals in that prison.
I only hope that if there is someone taking out the human filth in that penitentiary, that the next name on the list is a Maturi.
I sigh deeply, pushing my thoughts away from the past.
I almost, almost told Willow everything.
But there were some parts I had to leave out, no matter how guilty I felt.
I told her the worst part. That I beat someone to a pulp to get information. That other part… how Joe walked in on me filling a duffel bag with the contents of the safe… that part I can’t tell her. Not yet.
I shut my laptop, shoving it into its case.
