by Connor Crowe
I grasped at a long-forgotten memory, nothing but smoke in the haze of my mind. It dissipated like mist when I tried to grab onto it, dancing out of my reach.
“There is something,” I started. I pursed my lips. “But I can’t quite remember clearly.”
“Just tell us what you can,” Lionel urged.
“Something like a...” I waved my hands vaguely. “A bedtime story, I guess you could say. I wasn’t around a lot of my kind during my formative years. The Black Hands made sure of that.” Even now, the thought of my days in the compound brought an angry, sick feeling to my stomach. “But I remember the name of my homeland. That, I’ll always remember.” I caught Lionel’s gaze then, his hard eyes boring into mine. “Ataraxis.”
“The Flying City?” Hugo breathed, his eyes wide. It was the first time he’d spoken since I entered the room. Even now, the soft timbre of his voice did things to me. Things I didn’t understand, and didn’t want to.
What good was a mate, if he wouldn’t accept me? And what good was I as an omega, if I couldn’t bear children?
“I’ve read about that,” Lionel piped up. He set down his pen and looked to Hugo, then to Markus and me. “Land of the Sky Lords. Don’t tell me you grew up there?”
I barked out a laugh. “Yeah, and it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. My own parents disowned me when it suited them.”
It had been a while, but the reminder of it still stung.
“Disowned...how?” Hugo’s voice was quiet now. Almost mournful.
“It’s no secret that Ataraxis is one of the richest districts in the land. But with such wealth and power, well...” I shrugged. “There’s a lot that goes on there that people don’t know about.”
I waited for them to say something. To tell me I was crazy, or that I should have been grateful to grow up in what was essentially the royalty of our world. Nothing could be further from the truth. When they kept silent and watched me, waiting for more, I pressed on.
“My mother and father were wealthy nobles in the Flying City. Everything they did, they did for fame, power, or attention. So when word got out that I was omega...let’s just say they weren’t too happy about that.”
The faces around me were a mix of horror, sadness, and anger. To an outsider, Ataraxis was a place of endless pageantry and excess. They never even stopped to consider what that did to a person, or how hard they worked to maintain that image to the outside world.
“They tried to cover it up, at first. They sent me to a special school. Tried to train me out of my omega habits. Tried to instill responsibility and leadership and all that other stuff. Some of it stuck, of course, but you can never really deny your nature, can you?”
Hugo shook his head silently, knowing all too well what I was talking about. He too had been an outcast—a rare hybrid shifter in a land that sought to destroy them.
“So, when I had my first heat in a very awkward and very public fashion, they decided I wasn’t fit for polite society anymore. They didn’t want my ‘weakness’, as they called it, to sully their status. So they met up with a man who said he specialized in helping wayward omegas, and the rest was history.”
A few moments of silence stretched out between us, and for a second I was afraid they were too stunned to talk. Hugo spoke first.
“Wow,” he said at last. “That’s...wow.”
I huffed out a rueful sigh. “Yeah, that’s one way to put it.”
“Did they...” Hugo waved helplessly. “Did they know what they were getting themselves into? That the school was a front, I mean.”
I grimaced. “Is it bad for me to think that even if they did know, it wouldn’t have made a difference?” The words sounded hollow to my own ears. Like I was speaking underwater, gasping for air. The surface, and freedom, seemed oh so very far away...
A grounding hand on my shoulder brought me back to reality. Hugo’s hand.
I flicked my gaze over to his, and our eyes met. Instead of confusion, mockery, or distaste, I saw nothing but genuine concern. And the slightest twinkle of rubies just beyond the pupils, if I could just look hard enough...
“Those people,” his mouth twisted, “if you can even call them that, gave birth to you. But they are not your real family. Family is what you choose to make of it.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the tears to stop in their tracks. It had been so long since I had even thought about those painful memories, much less told them to anyone else. “I know,” I whispered. “I know.”
There were a few moments of silence as we sat there, simply taking in each other’s company. An old grandfather clock clicked away steadily in the background and the hearth crackled, but for a time, we just sat there. Reflecting. Thinking.
Grieving.
For all the things that had been. For all the things that could yet still be.
Markus broke the silence next, with a question I didn’t expect.
“Do you still know how to get to Ataraxis?”
I stared at him. “You’re not actually thinking of going there.”
Lionel pointed at something on the papers in front of him. “We think the final Key might be there. All the clues seem to fit, and you’re the only one that’s ever seen the place.”
I drew away from Hugo. From Lionel, and Markus and all of them. I nearly tumbled over a pile of books in my haste. My hands grew clammy. My heart raced. No. Absolutely not. There was no way I was going back there.
No. Freaking. Way.
“You don’t know what it’s like,” I said at last, my voice a hoarse croak. “It’s not worth it, it’s...”
“It’s necessary,” Markus finished, his face hard. “But remember. This time you won’t have to go it alone. You have family with you now. Real family. And we’ll be by your side if anything happens.”
I needed to run. To flee. To escape. My wings itched inside of me. The smell of the air and the gentle breeze called out. I could dodge them. Jump out the window. Shift and fly, far away.
But where would that get me?
“I can’t do this,” I whispered, looking to each of them with wide, scared eyes. I hadn’t felt this kind of fear since I was in the Black Hands. Panic. That’s what it was. A panic attack. I hadn’t had one in so long, and now…
”I can’t.” My shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry.” The world grew blurry around me and the ground shifted, rocking like the waves of the ocean.
My shifter cried out inside of me, trying to catch my fall, but it was too late.
2
James
“Someone collapsed in the Library.”
I perked up, looking at the messenger over my cup of tea. “What?”
“You heard me. Nasty fall, it sounded like. They need a medic over they’re immediately. Sent me over here to tell you.”
“Gods.” I stood, my tea all but forgotten. “Is he okay?”
“That’s for you to find out.”
I grabbed my bag of supplies and rushed for the door. “Thank you!” I called over my shoulder, and I was off.
Who gets themselves hurt in a library?
The words echoed in my skull as I raced down the corridors. Worst I thought could happen there was a paper cut. Maybe. If you were super unlucky.
But I guess I should have known better. The medical ward had been busier than ever in Nox Bay, especially ever since the Keys of Life had fallen, one by one.
Something was in the air, all right. And I didn’t like it one bit.
I pushed open the heavy wooden door without knocking. Immediately, my mind jumped into problem-solving mode.
There was a man on the floor.
There were three men surrounding him.
Papers and books scattered everywhere on the floor, like a tornado had come and ransacked the place.
But right now, that didn’t matter. What mattered most was the injured man in front of me.
I rushed to him and knelt, rolling him over onto his back. That’s when I caught a glimpse of his face
. That’s when I realized who he was.
Tristan Fen. None other than my secret, unrequited crush.
Of course.
I let out a breath to steady myself and let my hands do the work. I didn’t trust my brain to do the right thing right now.
Why did it have to be him?
“Is he going to be all right?” Another man asked, clinging much too close to us with fire in his eyes. That must be the phoenix shifter I’d heard about, Hugo. “He’s not...” his throat bobbed, and my mouth grew dry at the sight of it. “Dead, is he?”
I shook my head. “Nope, not dead. He’s still breathing, see?” I pointed, and that seemed to subdue him for the time being. “We just need to get him upright and get him hydrated. I’ve seen this before, shifters sometimes go into shock like this. Just what did you do to the poor guy?”
Hugo huffed indignantly. “We didn’t do anything! We were just asking a few questions.”
A fierce protectiveness tugged at my heart and I swallowed the desire to tell him off. “Well, whatever you were doing, it doesn’t matter, I suppose. Come on, the two of you don’t just stand there either!” I waved at Lionel and Markus, and they jumped into action.
It took some effort, but we managed to get him draped over a chair and upright while Lionel rushed to fetch some water. I checked out his vitals—pulse, breathing, temperature—all the while trying to ignore my own personal feelings about the subject.
Everyone knew that two omegas couldn’t be together.
Everyone except my stupid brain, apparently.
Lionel returned with a welcome distraction minutes later, helping me wipe down his forehead with a wet cloth and pouring a glass of cool water for him to drink.
I watched how carefully Hugo took care of Tristan. The gentle touches of his hands. Almost too gentle. The look of concern in his eyes that went a little bit past friendliness.
I knew that look.
“Here,” Hugo said, handing me the cloth. “What do we need to do now?”
I sorted through the mental checklist of care in my mind, thankful I’d done this so many times before. “We need to reach his shifter.”
“What?”
“Like I said, he’s in shock. His shifter is trying to protect him, but right now it’s keeping him under. If we can reach that part of him, we can wake him up.”
Hugo blinked at me. “How do we do that?”
I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Usually a shifter’s mate will have to do it, but a close friend or family member will do as well.”
What if Hugo was Tristan’s mate?
Oh well, I thought bitterly. It’s not like I had much of a chance anyway. Two omegas could never be together.
The others watched me gravely, and Hugo was next to speak. “Just tell me what I have to do.”
I had to admit, it wasn’t easy. Coaching someone else to express his love for the man I so desperately wanted?
But that didn’t matter. That wasn’t my job. My job was to make sure Tristan was alive and well. And if that meant I lost any chance at him in the process, well, so be it.
“Put your hands like this,” I instructed Hugo, pressing my fingers together and making a diamond with my hands. “Then place them over his heart.”
“That’s it?” Hugo asked incredulously. “Anyone could do that.”
“It’s not just the motion,” I pointed out. “When you place your hands on his chest, you want to reach out with your spirit. Think of your shifter, and see if it can reach his. He’s a gryphon, correct?”
“Yeah.”
“And you’re a phoenix.”
“Well, a dragon and phoenix hybrid, but yeah.”
“Then speak to them, and the intention will come through in your touch. I saw the way you looked at him, Hugo. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
Hugo’s face turned red and he looked away. His skin flushed the same color as the fire behind his eyes. He chewed his lip. “I care about him.”
Ouch. My heart.
“Then you need to let him know that.”
Hugo huffed out a breath. “Okay. I can do this.”
“You can do this,” I repeated, to assure him. Or was it to reassure myself? “Just do as I told you. Remember, hands like this.” I placed them in the proper pattern again and Hugo followed my lead.
“Now,” I instructed, and Hugo placed his hands over Tristan’s heart. He squeezed his eyes shut. Screwed up his face in concentration. I felt the fire and heat pouring off of him as he reached deep, connecting with both the dragon and the phoenix within him.
Tristan didn’t move.
I watched wordlessly as Hugo continued to press on, his face becoming more pained. More concerned.
It wasn’t working.
But that didn’t make any sense. I saw how much Hugo cared for him. They were supposed to be together. More so than him and I, anyway. Hugo was an alpha. He could give Tristan what he needed.
So why wasn’t he reacting to Hugo’s touch?
Hugo started panting, flames licking out from underneath his clothes and singing the edges of the fabric as he poured himself into the task. Lionel and Markus watched in horror.
“Do something!” Markus commanded. “He’s gonna blow!”
In that moment, I snapped out of my petty jealousy. I snapped out of the worry and fear and self doubt. I reached forward to pull Hugo’s hands away, but when I did so, something happened.
The moment my hands touched his, a spark like lightning zipped from my fingertips into his skin. My other hand rested on Tristan’s side, and now I moved it to cover Hugo’s, both of us working in tandem.
Then something happened I didn’t expect. Something I’d never seen in all my years of medicine.
When all three of us were connected, my shifter began to wake as well.
The wolf, normally quiet on the best of days, perked up and took notice. My sense of smell heightened, pulling in not one, but two tantalizing scents. One of them I’d smelled before. Course, that’s one of the reasons I was crushing on Tristan in the first place. He smelled so damn good!
But being this close to Hugo made me realize a new scent. It didn’t cover up or clash with Tristan’s. In fact, they kind of worked together. Like a harmony.
I let out a shuddered breath, feeling the surge of my shifter energy come to the surface and rush through my fingers.
“Please,” I mouthed, and the spark passed between all three of us once more.
Tristan’s body jumped.
I was so startled I nearly lost the connection, but the excitement kept me glued to his side. It was working!
Hugo looked over to me with wide, surprised eyes. Eyes that were just as confused and shocked as I was.
“Well don’t quit now,” I panted with what I’m sure must have been a delirious grin of relief and triumph. “It’s working!”
The connection between us grew, pulsing and tingling like a live wire. I felt Hugo’s energy and care and concern, passing over the bond and reaching down deep into Tristan’s spirit. But what unnerved me the most of all?
I could feel it in mine, too.
And there, deep in the recesses of Tristan’s heart, something changed.
It started beating again. It started working. His shifter and human sides swirled and combined, together once more.
Tristan opened his eyes, saw us both standing over him, and promptly asked the first question that came to mind.
“What is this, tag-team CPR or something?”
Thank everything above, he was alive. He was safe.
But something had happened in that moment when Hugo and I connected. Something had happened not just with me and him, but with all three of us.
The spark of connection I’d learned could only happen between fated pairs, or so I thought.
Was it even possible to happen with three people, instead of two?
The sounds of Tristan’s coughing pushed those thoughts out of my mind and snapped me back to the present.
We got him set upright and breathing, and after he’d caught his breath, I offered him the glass of water.
He refused it at first, screwing up his face like we were trying to offer him poison, but relented when the coughs came again.
His eyes, though. That was the first thing I noticed.
Ever since he’d opened them once more, they had a new gleam to them. A shiny, glassy look. A haunted look.
I didn’t like it one bit.
“How are you feeling?” I asked him after he’d taken a few sips of water.
He shuddered at that, even though the room was quite warm. Shrunk away from us.
“You were right,” he said at last, voice hoarse. “I saw it.”
“Saw what?” I pressed gently, but inside my heart tripped into double time.
“The Wings of the Wind,” he whispered. “The final Key. It’s there, all right. It’s on Ataraxis.”
I let out a breath. Closed my eyes for a moment. Of course it was. The belly of the beast itself.
“I know how painful it must be for you,” Markus started. “But if it will put an end to all of this...”
“I’ll do it,” Tristan interrupted. This time, there was no hesitation.
“Are you sure?” Hugo asked, still holding Tristan’s hand.
“I said I’ll do it,” Tristan repeated. “Looks like it’s time to pay my folks a visit.”
“You’re dismissed,” Markus waved at me. “We will need to make preparations.”
I froze. I’d just saved this man’s life, and they were dismissing me like a petty servant? “Excuse me?” I stammered.
“Thank you for your help, James. We can take it from here. Surely you have other patients that need attending to?”
I clenched my jaw and glared at Hugo. I couldn’t have been the only one that felt that connection between us. Something was going on, and I was willing to bet it was more than just my medical skills that brought Tristan back.
“If you’re going to The Flying City, it will be dangerous.” I chose my next words carefully. “It would be prudent to bring a medic along. You know, just in case.”
