They deserve that. I want to be the man all three of my girls need. Rodeo won’t last forever; I know that. But my family, they will. They’re mine until the day I die. I owe it to them to be there, like they’re always there for me.
I watch Allie sing and sway to “Firecracker.” The lights from the show pass over her, illuminating her in yellows, reds, and flashes of blue and white. She’s lost in the music, putting everything behind us, and she looks every bit the beautiful, strong woman I’ve been in love with since I was seventeen years old.
It’s time I start showing her how in love I am again.
I slip in behind her, sliding my hands to her waist, moving my body with hers, and nipping at her neck playfully so she’ll throw her head back and laugh. And she does. She drops her head back on my shoulder, smiling wide, her cheeks noticeably flushed from the drinks she’s had and from dancing and moving in the hot night air.
Her eyes land on mine and I tip my head down, kissing her lips. And then the song comes to an end. Our bodies quit moving, stilling while he speaks up on stage, talking about the next song he’s going to sing, how it’s dedicated to all of the couples in the audience tonight. Then the music starts again.
It’s slower than “Firecracker” and the second I hear the first words of “Soulmate” being sung, I slip my hands from her hips around to her stomach and settle them there, holding her protectively, caressing the spot our children have all started at. The spot we lost our last child from.
I start to sing along to the song, quietly in her ear, swaying slightly. Every single word he and I are singing is absolutely true. Halfway through the song I stop singing and start talking.
“You are my soul mate, Allie. The woman who lifts me up. The woman I will grow old with. And I hope to God that I do go first when the day comes, because I could never and would never love anyone like I love you.” I kiss her temple and rub my hand over her stomach. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you, baby. I am so sorry you have gone through some of your hardest days alone. I will be better for you. I’ll be better for the girls.”
She spins in my arms and wraps her own around my neck, then looks up at me with tears in her eyes. She opens her mouth to speak and I silence her with a quick kiss.
“I’m not done yet.” I kiss her again and let her pull my hat from my head before I wrap her tighter and lower my head so my mouth is pressed to her ear again, and then I continue, “You were right about a lot you said. I’m not going to quit. I wouldn’t have if we had had another ten children. But I swear to you, I’ll be there for you. I wouldn’t be the man I am, the rider I am, or anything if it weren’t for your love.”
Allie lifts her head and kisses my lips, letting the taste of her tears and the drinks she’s had tonight mix with the taste of the beers I’ve been drinking, then nods her answer. We start swaying to the song again, and I pick back up with the end of the song, singing quietly about how I will never find another soulmate in my life because she’s it. She will be it through the very end of time.
Allie
I slide my fingers through Chase’s hair and hold his hat against his back, listening to every word he’s singing in my ear. I don’t hear the band. I don’t hear my favorite country singer. As far as I’m concerned, the only two people here tonight are Chase and me, and he’s serenading me with a song all about how we are each other’s soul mates. Between verses of the song, he told me he heard everything I said earlier, and he wants to be better.
As the song rolls to an end, I move my hand to his cheek and guide it so his lips are pressed to mine again. While I kiss him, I mumble against his lips, “I love you.”
He mumbles it back and keeps kissing me, even though there is no music, and it’s possible the people around us are watching. He poured his heart out to me, and I haven’t even apologized for the terrible things I said to him.
“Chase,” I pull back just enough, and exhale when he rests his forehead against mine.
“Yeah?” he whispers, slowly moving his hands up and down my back.
“I’m so sorry I said what I did, about the baby, about you…”
“I forgive you.” He wraps me up tighter and buries his face in my neck. I can feel his lips moving over my skin, and then feel his tongue slide over the place my pulse is beating harder for him.
The next song starts, and he chuckles into my neck, then starts moving our bodies quicker to the beat of the song.
This time he doesn’t sing to me. No, he lets his mouth dance over my skin, holds us together so our hips roll and swirl with each other, and lets me feel him between us, reaffirming with each second of song that passes how much it really does turn him on to be mine.
A raspy moan travels up my throat and it’s my turn to whisper now, “Take me back to the hotel? Cody and the girls won’t be expecting us yet.”
His stubble passes over my neck as he nods, and then he turns me back around, letting me walk in front of him, keeping his midsection hidden behind me until we are free of the crowd and in the parking lot. Then his hands are all over me again until we get to his truck.
Chase
Never in my life have I been happier to have a bench seat in my truck than I am right now. Allie wasted no time scooting as close to me as she could when we got out here, and as we pass through the dark, empty streets leading to our hotel, I can hold her close and touch her all I want with nothing between us.
“Don’t lose focus on the road,” she murmurs, while sliding her hand up my leg. It’s really hard to follow her command when her fingers graze over my crotch. My cock twitches beneath her touch, and the painful strain against my jeans becomes unbearable torture as she continues to move her hands agonizingly slowly over me.
“Maybe—” I swallow hard, then try again, “Maybe you shouldn’t do that, then. I don’t want to crash.”
She lets out a little giggle, and pulls her hand back, laying it back on my thigh again. Allie isn’t usually so reckless with us driving, but I imagine she’s feeling a little looser than normal with the drinks in her system. When she asked for another drink, I knew she needed a night of freedom and letting loose, so I stopped.
“Drive quicker, then?” There’s a quiet, sultry rasp to her voice that tells me that for as hard and in desperate need of her as I am, she’s equally needy of me.
“I’m going as fast as I can,” I reply, then slide my hand back from around her and move it to her lap, dipping my fingers between the denim valley created by her jeans and rubbing over her inner thigh. “We’ll be there in ten.”
I pull off the highway and we get caught at the red light at the bottom of the exit, so I lean over to her and kiss her lips. She kisses me back slow and steady, teasing my lips with her tongue and playful nips over my lips, and she moves her hand back up my leg again, making me groan against her when her fingers pass over me, tracing the obvious swell in my jeans. She smiles triumphantly, then says, “The light’s green. Get us home.”
Home. That’s not where we’re going. Not even close. But the sentiment lodges in my chest and settles there. It’s a hotel. Her ease of calling it home, simply because we are going back there together, to stay, means that even with the way the night started, everything said, everything thrown out into the universe, I’m still home to her. Just as she is to me.
We pass through the streets of Cheyenne in a hurry. Her perfume fills the cab of my truck, and her breath is coming in deep, heavy bursts. White lines over black pavement blur together, and neon signs over businesses turn into a passing rainbow of lights. The way she can’t take her hands off of me—my leg, my achingly hard cock, my neck, her lips on my arms, her fingers playing with the buttons of my shirt—they all mix to stimulate each of my senses in a way that builds the deep-seated need in the pit of my stomach into a tight knot ready to unravel as soon as we’re in our room.
I feel like a horny, desperate teen again—and it’s so fitting—being here with her, in the same place we shared our first kiss together, w
here we first met. I squeeze her thigh gently, yet possessively, and whisper, “I love you, Allie.”
“I love you, too.”
I get us to the hotel and pull into the first parking spot I can find, vaguely hoping it’s not reserved or valet, as I lean back into my wife and plant another kiss on her lips. “Let’s get upstairs.”
I open my door and drop down, helping her scoot over my spot and taking her by the hips, lowering her down in front of me. I let her slide down the front of my body then move my hands to her neck, holding either side and framing her face with my thumbs, then lay a featherlight kiss over her lips, her nose, her forehead.
She releases a small sigh and blinks up at me, smiling softly. “Upstairs…”
I scoop her into my arms, drawing out a shocked gasp and then a laugh.
“Chase!”
“Hush,” I say, kissing her again, raising my boot up behind me to nudge the door closed before carrying her inside.
She pulls my hat off my head and runs her fingers though my hair, letting my hat hang down from her side, discreetly covering my obvious hard-on as we walk through the lobby to the elevator.
“Your fingers are magical,” I murmur into her ear before I trace its shell with my lips.
“So are your lips.” She keeps stroking her fingers through my hair and then along my jaw, back up to my hair, repeating the same path. “Kiss me, please?”
We step into the elevator and once the doors close, I oblige. Our mouths form together, lips parting, tongues dancing and tasting, until we reach our floor.
The doors open after the ding and release us into the hall, not far from our room.
“Back pocket, my key’s there,” Allie says, then grazes her lips over my neck, scraping her teeth right over the spot where my blood is thumping hardest against my skin.
Her lips, tongue, and teeth are a tantalizing combination of heaven and hell over my skin. The way she nips and sucks causes the hair on the back of my neck to stand on end and makes my dick swell further in my pants, straining so hard against the zipper I’m surprised it hasn’t forced it open yet. I moan and slide a hand beneath her ass, rubbing over the denim before I dip my fingers into the pocket and withdraw the little plastic card that will give us entry to our room.
“Give me,” she commands, placing my hat back on my head and taking the key from me, expertly sliding it through the reader and opening our door with a click so we can pass through.
As soon as it’s shut behind us, I set her down, roaming my hands over her back and ass, reaching for the hem of her tank top and tugging it up and off. Her fingers move in a practiced, precise pattern starting at the top of my shirt and working their way down, popping each button free, exposing more and more of my bare chest to her.
“My jeans, free me,” I grind out, working the clasp of her bra open and then moving down to her jeans, loosening the button and zipper at the same time as she does mine.
“Chase,” she says reverently, as she works my jeans and underwear down my hips and sets my member free. I look down between us, watching as the last of her clothes fall down her legs, seeing the effects each of us have had on each other up until now. My cock is harder than stone and in desperate need of her touch.
“You did that to me, you always do.” I kick my boots off and step free of the clothes surrounding our feet, holding her hips to balance her when she does the same.
Instead of letting me walk her back to the bed, she guides us in a slow turn, then with her hand to my chest, she directs me back to the bed, giving me a gentle shove once the mattress is behind my legs so I fall onto it, landing with a thud on the mattress.
“I want—” she starts to say, before I cut her off by tugging her hips and bringing her down on top of me.
“I do, too,” I nod, tracing my fingers over her back, dipping them into the little dimples just above her ass.
She moves her hands to the mattress and uses it to pull herself up over my lap, sliding her slickened flesh over my thighs and coming to stop just before my dick. Then she puts her hands on my chest and pushes herself up so she’s seated over me. She smiles down on me, like a queen perched on her throne, and takes my length in one of her hands, stroking and holding it upright like a scepter before her.
“Christ,” I hiss out in approval, watching her hand grip and squeeze from root to tip until another bead of arousal oozes from the head. “Fuck me… Ride me until you can’t move anymore. Take what you need and give me you in return.”
Allie
I lift up onto my knees and move forward, angling him so I can lower myself over him. I move slowly, relishing in the feeling taking him in gives me. He’s so hard. Even with moving slowly and deliberately, there’s a subtle sting of pain that comes with accepting him deeper and deeper, one that slowly gives way to full, powerful, pleasure.
He isn’t rushing me, or taking control of this; he’s giving himself—his power—to me. He’s showing me how much I mean to him, how much he loves me, how much he respects me, even though if he could, he’d fuck me senseless right now. It makes me love him even more.
Once I’m fully seated on him, I bend forward, sliding my hands over his chest, and wrap my fingers loosely around his neck, pressing my lips to his in the softest of kisses I can manage.
“You feel so good,” he growls against my lips.
I can feel his hands roaming over my back—with his fingers tracing down my spine slowly—and chills erupt in their wake. His body is firm and strong beneath mine. The perfect balance to my soft spots and curves. And all I want is to melt into him, to lose track of where I end and he begins. I kiss him again and push myself back up, keeping my hands on his chest, so I can start to move over him. I rock back and forth slowly, finding the perfect rhythm that makes him rub me in the places I need most.
“God, Chase…” I hum out, then slowly raise up and glide back down on him. Repeating the same rocking, lifting, lowering motions over and over. “I need more. I want you, all of you.”
He smiles up at me, and his eyes—bright and stunning, even in the dimly lit room—are the window to his soul right now. There isn’t a single thing behind them that he’s hiding from me. The look on his face makes my breath catch, and causes a stutter in my movements over him, throwing my rhythm off.
“You do have all of me, you always have.” He sits up slowly, wrapping an arm around my waist to keep me from falling off his lap, then nuzzles his nose against mine. “I love you Allie.”
“I love you too,” I murmur into his neck. “Help me. Take control.”
He nods silently and his legs shift a little beneath me, finding their footing on the ground, then his hands move to my hips and guide me. He lifts me, then pulls me back down while he thrusts up, setting a new, quicker pace.
I use my knees, planted on either side of his legs, and start to move up and down at his pace on my own. I lift. I drop. He thrusts. I roll my hips toward him. With every new start to the pattern I get closer and closer. His lips flutter over my collarbones, his tongue dips into the hollow of my neck. His hands fall between us and his fingers rub in steady circles over my swollen, sensitive bundle of nerves.
“I’m. So. Close.” I stutter out. With my eyes closed I can feel every tiny sensation firing in my body. Every brush of his five o’clock shadow over my skin. Every circle of the rough pad of his thumb over my clit. The sweet nothings he’s whispering, telling me how beautiful I am. How perfect. How I was made for him. It’s all a complete system overload. Instead of shutting me down, it sends my body into overdrive. All it takes is his mouth sealing over mine, taking my breath and giving me his own, to set me off.
Then I fall.
My body trembles around him, and little bursts of light flash behind my eyes, mimicking the jolts of pleasure zapping through me. He swallows my moans until they start to blend with his own as he comes with a shudder, filling me completely with his release.
He kisses my lips, my cheeks, my chin, and then buries hi
s face in my neck, so I feel each hot, panted breath he takes.
“Do we have to call Cody right away?” he asks after a few minutes of silently catching our breaths. “Or can we take a while to just be? I’ll grab a shower before they come back.”
I glance at the clock on the nightstand and shake my head. “We have a little. I don’t think I can move just yet, anyway.”
“Then don’t, not yet.” He carefully lifts me so he can scoot us back onto the bed, and then he cradles me to his chest, rubbing my back, and kissing the crown of my head.
His heart is beating steadily beneath my ear. It’s hypnotizing. It’s comforting. It lulls me into such a calmness that my mind starts to wander just a little to earlier. To our girls. Our lives together.
“Chase?” I whisper, almost hesitantly, after a couple of minutes pass us by.
“Yeah?”
“I understand your need to be out there.” I pause, listening to his heart again, using it to gauge his reaction to what I’m saying. “I know what you’re doing, what you’re trying to accomplish this year, but, baby?”
“Yeah?” he replies, his voice is quieter and gravellier this time, almost like he’s afraid of what I’m going to ask and say to him.
“You don’t have anything to prove. Not to me, or the girls. Not to anyone. We will find a way to bring another beautiful baby into this world. But—” I break off, not finishing my thought as his heart starts pounding beneath me.
“But what?”
“But you’ve been gone so much that maybe, when all is said and done, you will have to prove you do love your girls, more than you love rodeo.”
“Allie…”
“I know, Chase. I do,” I say, turning my head in to kiss over his heart. “But they need time with you. Aubrey isn’t all about rodeo or riding, she loves her gymnastics and dance. And Ava, well, she’s all you, but she still needs you to be there and present for her. During the school year it isn’t as bad. They’re at school and long days and early nights full of school and activities make your absence from home easier.”
Hold on Tight (Cowboys & Angels Book 1) Page 14
