I felt like my head might explode from everything he was saying. It was too much to take in.
“There can only be so many Seers and when one isn’t doing their job of saving the lives that are taken before their time then…eventually, their visions start to fade. That’s what’s happening to you right now. You’ve ignored your visions for so long you weren’t able to see the woman’s face in the vision you had last night. There comes a point where you can’t get that back and you’re almost at that point, Taylor.”
I took a second to process his words and decided that it didn’t seem like a bad thing. I’d wanted the visions to stop from the moment they began. “I’m okay with that. I don’t want these visions. I don’t want this fucking gift. Let them take it back.”
He shook his head and I knew I wasn’t going to like what he was about to say. “It doesn’t work that way. Your visions will never fully disappear but you won’t be any good as a Seer because you can’t see who it is you’re supposed to be helping. I already told you there can only be so many of your kind. If you don’t start embracing your visions and do what you can to help the people you see, then another Seer must be born to take your place.”
“Okay. So let another one be born. I’ll gladly step aside for them to take over.”
He let out a frustrated growl. “Taylor, listen to me carefully. For another Seer to be born with their full gift, one must die to relinquish all of the power that they hold.” He paused to see if his words were sinking in then drove his point home. “If you don’t start doing the job that was given to you, you won’t make it to your twenty-fourth birthday.”
Everything stopped; the noise from the people around us, the grinding of the espresso maker, the clanging sounds of the baristas working behind the counter. Everything was silent except for the blood rushing in my ears. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath until the pressure in my chest brought me back to reality. I sucked in a breath and pinned Daniel with a hard stare. “So you’re saying my only options are to live the rest of my life seeing things that will more than likely drive me insane or die? All because I’m being punished for not using a gift I didn’t want in the first fucking place!”
“I’m sorry,” he stated weakly.
“You’re sorry. I’m going to die or go crazy and all I get from you is ‘I’m sorry’? Wow, you really suck at this. How in the hell did you even get this job anyway? Because I seriously think you need a demotion or something.”
“I had just as much choice in it as you did,” he demanded somewhat coldly. My insults had obviously hit their mark.
A bitter laugh bubbled up in my throat and I couldn’t hold it back. “Then what a pair we make, huh? Just two people being royally screwed by the universe.”
When the tears I’d been holding back finally broke free Daniel reached for my hands and laced our fingers together on top of the table. “I’m doing everything I can, Taylor. Now that I’m actually allowed to intervene I’ve been doing everything in my power to get through to you.”
“The nightmares,” I guessed.
He gave a slight nod and looked almost heartbroken. “It was the only way. The dreams were the only way I could keep these women at the forefront of your mind. Once you accept this and start trying to help, your visions will come back to their full strength and the dreams will stop.”
I pulled my hands from his and reached for my purse. “Nightmares, Daniel, not dreams. There’s a huge difference. What you’ve been doing has resulted in a total of eight hours of sleep in a week. I’m terrified to close my eyes at night.”
I stood up and started to step away from the table when his voice followed after me. “Embrace this, Taylor. Please. I can’t save you if you don’t and I’ve already failed you enough as it is.”
I turned back and looked at his face. He really was handsome even when his eyes were squeezed shut and his forehead was creased in defeat. “Your hands were tied just as much as mine were.” Daniel’s eyes popped open and narrowed on me as I spoke. “You’ve done your job so you can sleep easy now. At least you have that. I’ve got to get to work.”
And with that, I turned, walked out the door of the coffee shop and left Daniel to stare after me.
When I pushed through the door of Benny’s, I was twenty minutes late for my shift. Cassie came rushing up to me with worry etched on her pretty face. “Taylor, are you okay? You look upset.”
I tried to smile, but my lips didn’t want to cooperate. “I’m fine, just slept through my alarm. Is Benny mad?”
I heard her approach me from behind. “Of course I’m not mad,” Benny replied in a raspy voice. “Child, you haven’t been late for a shift in the five years you’ve been here. I wasn’t mad, I was worried.”
“Thank you for the concern but everything’s fine.” I tried to walk around her and toward the back office to drop my purse, but for an older, out of shape woman, Benny was surprisingly quick on her feet. She cut me off before I could even take one step. “You haven’t been sleeping, you’re late for work, and I didn’t want to bring it up, but…well…you’ve lost quite a bit of weight, sweetheart.”
I placed my hands on my waist and leveled her with a stare. I had the utmost respect for my boss, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t piss me off. “What are you trying to say, Benny?”
I shouldn’t have asked.
“I’m saying you look like shit and you need a vacation,” she responded with the attitude I could imagine a mother using on her teenage daughter.
My mouth dropped open as Cassie stood beside me laughing hysterically.
“Unbelievable,” I grumbled as I pushed past her and stalked to the office. “I’m not taking a vacation so deal with it,” I called over my shoulder.
“Well if you keel over in the middle of the dinner rush, don’t expect me to do more than step over your boney little body. It’ll be your own damn fault.”
This day can’t possibly get any worse.
I threw my purse into my locker with a little too much force and the contents spilled out, rolling all over the floor.
I spoke too soon.
I was more pissed off than I’d ever been as I snatched up an apron, leaving my purse and everything in it on the floor, and headed out to the dining room. I was starting to look forward to losing myself in the monotony of my day when I heard a voice that had my eyes rolling in annoyance.
“Well, well, well. Looky what we have here. You’re looking mighty fine this morning if I do say so myself,” Stevens, formerly known as Stank Breath called out.
I’d never been one for confrontation. I’d spent my life shying away from anything that could draw attention to myself, but his pompous attitude had me wanting to yell out something that could have possibly gotten me fired. That was, until I spun around and saw that he was sitting with Jordan. If he looked good yesterday, he was damn near edible today.
He’d looked fine in jeans and a Henley when I’d first seen him, but today he was in a white button down shirt with the cuffs folded up to his elbows, showing off his thick, muscular forearms. My blood heated and I felt like butterflies were going crazy deep in my belly. Seeing as I’d never allowed myself to get too close to people before, my instant reaction to him confused the hell out of me. I wanted to get closer…wanted to explore all of the new feelings he brought out in me and that was a very dangerous feeling.
It didn’t make sense, especially considering I knew nothing about him, but the turmoil that was constantly floating around me seemed to lessen whenever he was around. I didn’t know if I should be concerned with the fact that a man I hadn’t even known for twenty-four hours could affect me the way he was, but I couldn’t stop the heady rush I felt from wanting him that swept over me just by looking at him.
He made me feel things I didn’t know how to describe. I’d never felt more alive, but at the same time, scared out of my mind. It felt exhilarating just being near him. I’d never experienced anything like it in my twenty-three years and a la
rge part of me hoped that I’d feel that way for years to come.
Then sadness dragged me down faster than I ever thought possible. My earlier conversation with Daniel let me know I might not have many years left to live. I might not have the chance to know what it felt like to have a boyfriend or to love someone else. I might not ever get the chance to really lose myself in a man. I was being dragged down by the decision I had to make, lost to the sadness it caused. That high I was feeling just moments before was gone.
As if he sensed the change in my demeanor, the smile slipped from his sexy lips and a frown creased his brow. “What can I get you guys?” I asked, not taking my eyes off my pad.
“Reuben for me and turkey club for this asshole here,” Stevens replied.
I scribbled down their order, and then before I could stop myself, my mouth opened and the words just poured out. I never initiated conversations with other people but I found myself wanting to do or say something just so I could hear Jordan’s voice. “Same sandwiches two days in a row. Either the food here is better than I thought or you guys can’t cook for shit.”
Stevens let out a loud guffaw and slapped the table. “Nah, the food’s okay but not that good. We just came back ‘cause this loser’s got a thing for ya and was in the mood to get shot down a second time. He offered to pay so I thought why the hell not?”
My head shot up in surprise and I flicked my gaze from Stevens to Jordan who looked about ready to commit murder. “You’re paying for your own damn meal now, dickhead.”
Stevens let out a groan that caused his potbelly to jiggle and I feared for the buttons on his shirt. “Ah, come on man. I was just laying the foundation for you.”
“Go sit over there,” Jordan said with a growl as he pointed to another table.
Stevens grumbled under his breath as he stood and made his way to the other table not in my section. I couldn’t make out everything he said, but I was pretty sure I heard douche bag, cock sucker, and—my favorite of them all—son of a horse faced crack head. I had to hand it to Stevens, he was a tool, but at least he was a colorful one.
I tried to suppress my laughter as I turned back to Jordan, but when I caught him biting on his bottom lip to keep from laughing himself, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. After a second, Jordan joined in and the sound of his laughter warmed my soul. Thoughts of pressing my lips to that beautiful mouth flooded my brain.
“Sorry about him,” he grumbled once we’d pulled ourselves together.
“No problem. We already established yesterday that he had some permanent brain damage.”
He rubbed the back of his neck in nervous strokes. “It seems like every conversation we have starts with me apologizing. Maybe I’ll get it right one day.”
I bent my head to try and obstruct his view of my reddening cheeks, but I knew it didn’t work. At that moment I would have given anything for a tan just to hide the flush on my face. “There it is,” he murmured and I could hear the smile in his voice. “Ahhh…there’s the blush.” His eyes warmed. “You’re beautiful, Crimson.”
I looked at him with a small smile. “Thank you,” I whispered so low I knew it was barely audible.
I fumbled with my pad and pen and tried to beat a hasty retreat. “I’ll just go put in your order.”
Before I could walk away, he spoke. “He might be a jackass but he’s right, you know.”
“I’m sorry?”
“Stevens. He’s right. I came back hoping for another shot. I’m more prepared this time though. I gave myself a pep talk in front of the mirror this morning and everything.”
The cheeky grin he gave me showcased his perfect teeth and lips and I was surprised to see that he had dimples.
His lightheartedness was quickly rubbing off on me, because before I knew it, I was playing right into his trap and flirting back. “A pep talk, huh? How’d that work for you?”
“Pretty good actually. Myself told me that I’m a reasonably attractive, thirty-something with a 401K and dental insurance. We’re fairly positive that I’m a total catch, and we both think you’d have a great time if you let me take you out.”
I cocked my hip and crossed my arms over my chest. “You know you sound a little certifiable right now, don’t you?” I asked through a grin.
“Myself says it’s all part of my charm.”
I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and glanced over to see Benny and Cassie huddled together at the hostess stand. Their undivided attention was on mine and Jordan’s interaction and there was no masking huge grins on each of their faces.
I shook my head at my friends and turned my attention back to Jordan. “Yourself might be lying to you,” I teased, surprised that I was actually flirting again.
“What if I told you I also had medical insurance and own my own home that my mother does not live in?”
For the second time in as many days, I laughed a real, genuine laugh deep from within. “When you put it that way, how could a girl resist?”
He clapped his hands together in triumph. “I knew I’d wear you down. Now give me your number before you have time to change your mind.”
I quickly scrawled my number on a blank order slip and passed it his way. He pulled out his wallet and slid it in carefully like he was taking extra care not to wrinkle it.
I’d just taken a major leap into the unknown, and while it was scary, it was a completely different, exciting kind of fear.
Jordan
“You’ve seen the girl two times for all of five minutes. How is it that you’re already pussy whipped?” Stevens asked.
I swear to Christ…if Barry Stevens wasn’t my partner, I’d murder him. I was seriously contemplating it as it was. He’d been on my ass all day long about what went down at the diner that morning.
“I’m not pussy whipped, you moron. It’s called courting. You should try it some time. Maybe if you’d do more than grunt and leer at women like a pervert you’d actually get someone else to play with your dick for once.”
“My dick gets played with plenty, fuck you very much.”
I let out a derisive laugh as I got in the driver side of the car while Stevens squeezed his gut into the passenger seat. He was wrong. I wasn’t pussy whipped, but there was definitely something about Taylor that enthralled me…and it wasn’t just that she was beautiful. But Christ, that girl was beautiful. Long, dark, wavy hair that went almost all the way to that perfect ass of hers made me want to wrap it around my fist as I took her. The woman had curves that would tempt a priest. But it was her eyes that drew me in the most. They were the most unique brown I’d ever seen, almost like burnished copper. Despite how gorgeous they were, there was a sadness behind them that shouldn’t have been there. Her eyes held so much sorrow and I felt compelled to make it better.
There was no doubt in my mind that she was several years younger than I was and had obviously experienced something bad in her life that made her hesitant. The nervousness that radiated off of her was almost palpable and I usually ran in the other direction when it came to women with that much drama, but I couldn’t stay away from her. I hardly knew her, yet I was already certain that if she gave me the chance, I’d do everything in my power to take that pain away. It didn’t make sense. I wanted to know her. I needed to know her. And in just a few more hours I was going to get my chance.
I’d been on countless dates in my life, but for the first time ever, I was actually anxious at the thought of taking the beautiful Taylor out.
Huh…maybe I was pussy whipped.
If I was anxious I could only imagine how Taylor was fairing considering nervous seemed to be the norm for her. She was probably freaking the hell out. I started to wonder if she was considering bailing on the date and decided I should cut her off at the pass, just in case. I pulled out my cell and scrolled down to her number.
Tonight was happening no matter what.
Taylor
Oh God, what the hell was I thinking saying yes to Jordan? I’d never been on
a date before, yet I picked Jordan as my foray into the dating world; a good looking man who was probably an expert at all things relating to women. Instead of dipping my toe in the kiddy pool I’d just cannon balled right into the deep end.
Shit.
Even yoga wasn’t helping. I was currently in my living room, spread out on the floor in child’s pose. I should have been relaxed…centered, but instead I was hyperventilating and about two seconds away from a full blown panic attack.
That’s it, I’m cancelling.
I didn’t care if Cassie threatened to kick my ass before I left work earlier. I couldn’t go through with it. Agreeing to a date with Jordan was a mistake. After all, it wasn’t as if I didn’t have more important, essentially life ending decisions I needed to concentrate on. I should have been worrying about that rather than freaking out over a stupid date that wouldn’t even matter in the long run. Nothing was going to be able to come from the date anyway. I was destined to end up either crazy or dead. Nowhere in either of those scenarios was room for a relationship.
I was right in the middle of thinking up a good excuse when my cell phone chimed.
J: If I was a betting man I’d lay down money that you’re having second thoughts.
How could he have possibly known that? Was he another Daniel or something? God, I really hoped that wasn’t the case.
Nightmares from Within Page 5
