by Alesha Dixon
She’s right. As soon as she says it, I know she’s right.
“So . . . we just keep going as we are?”
“I think that’s the only thing we can do.”
We sit a few moments in silence and then she gets up, prompting me to do the same. We glumly make our way back through the library.
“Thank you for keeping my career going,” Naomi says. “Not many people could have handled it, but you don’t seem to be having any trouble.”
“I have a lot of trouble with the shoes and constant outfit changes,” I assure her. “Your stylists have had to help me out of a few tight spots when I’ve got lost in all the weird and wonderful dresses they put me in. After performing in Birmingham last night, I had to go to an awards ceremony and they chose this amazing gown. I put it over my head and the ruffles confused me. I thought I was going to grow old in there.”
She giggles. “I miss those dresses! Although, it’s been nice not having to worry about what I look like for a couple of weeks. Kind of like being on holiday.”
“So, you haven’t even tried? The least you could do whilst parading around as me is give me some style points. You won teen fashion icon of the year! I know because I accepted that award the other day.”
“Hey, you should be grateful that I haven’t got you expelled,” she says proudly, as though it’s some great achievement. “Although, there have been a couple of close calls. Your school file is now much more impressive. Did you know that it’s against the rules to trip people up in PE? So much for competitive spirit.”
“Oh no,” I groan. “I’ve managed to go happily unnoticed for years.”
“What’s so wrong with standing out?” she asks curiously.
Rose clears her throat as we shuffle closer to her desk. “Did you want to renew that book, Ruby? And uh . . . Naomi Starr, I don’t know if you remember, but you also took a copy. I must admit I wasn’t expecting to see you here ever again. I assumed that book might be lost for ever.”
“Yes, I’m sorry for snatching it out of Ruby’s hands so rudely,” I say pointedly, as Naomi rolls her eyes. “Your library is a wonderful haven of imagination and I respect that.”
Naomi pretends to retch. Rose looks at me, bewildered.
“Also,” I continue, because of the eye-rolling and retching and also because it’s quite fun to have this kind of power, “I would like to donate some money towards this much-deserving library. It’s really the least I can do for my appalling behaviour last time I was here.”
“How generous of you!” Rose exclaims.
“Yes. How generous of you,” Naomi says through gritted teeth.
“You are very welcome. Maybe I’ll write some songs about this place,” I add wistfully, for effect.
“Maybe I’ll give Daisy back to the rescue centre where I got her,” Naomi says. “She’s been very annoying recently.”
“WHAT? DON”T YOU—” I stop myself as she grins triumphantly. I cough, lowering my voice to a mumble. “Anyway, the point is I’d like to renew the book.”
“Me too,” Naomi says.
“Ah, well that won’t be a problem for you, Ruby,” Rose says, typing into her computer, before looking up at me. “The only thing is Naomi, you need to be a registered member of the library to borrow a book. But as you’re donating so generously to the library, I imagine you won’t mind taking the time to fill out a form!”
“No problem,” I say cheerily, taking the form she slides across from me and clicking my pen at the ready. “How fun to be a member of such a great library.”
“Yes, how fun to give out all your personal details to a member of the public,” Naomi says sarcastically. “Because that’s what all famous pop stars do.”
I pause at the bit asking for a phone number, taking her point.
“Perhaps,” Naomi continues, smiling sweetly at Rose, “on this occasion, you could let Naomi Starr be a member without needing all this information? Especially as she’s giving so . . . generously to the library. You can put down my information under her registration.”
“Of course, I completely understand.” She types away at the keyboard. “There you go, all sorted. You can borrow that book now. But don’t return it late!” She laughs, waggling her finger at me. “I wouldn’t want to fine Ruby on your behalf. Enjoy the books!”
“You were joking about Daisy, right?” I say as soon as we’re outside. “You were joking. Just confirm you were joking!”
“I was joking,” she says calmly, checking my phone. “Once you get past her stinky breath and scruffy appearance, she’s not too bad. Right, I have to go. There’s a bus coming along in a minute and I’m going to be late.”
“Late for what? It’s a Friday. Ooh! Is there a nature documentary on tonight that you guys are watching?”
“There’s your car,” she says, nodding at the limo parked down the road. “What do you have on this evening?”
“A party. I can’t remember if it’s mine or someone else’s,” I say, watching as the car pulls up alongside us. “But I do know that it’s important to be there. I’ll see you soon; keep texting.”
One of the security team has jumped out the car and is waiting, holding the door open for me. Before I get in, Naomi stops me.
“Hey. Can I just say something?” She takes my arm, pulling us out of earshot. “I know that we want to swap back now, but I’m glad that this happened in the first place. This experience has really opened my eyes. Your world is pretty cool. In its own way.”
“Thanks.” I smile at her. “Same for you.”
She cranes her neck, looking over my shoulder. “There’s the bus. I better go. See you soon, Ruby.”
She dashes across the road to get to the bus stop in time and it’s not until I’m in the car, driving to the party that I realize she got on a bus going in the wrong direction to home.
Why would she be heading back to school?
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
(AS RUBY)
“There you are!”
Beth pounces on me as soon as I walk into the green room, which is actually just a classroom that Mrs Jennings has declared to be the room for her “artists” to get ready before the show.
“We’re about to do a huddle,” Beth informs me, putting her arm over my shoulders. “Come on, Starr Squad, everyone come in together.”
“You waited for me to do the huddle? Thanks!”
“Duh!” She shakes her head as though I’ve just said something stupid.
I wish I could tell her that I’ve performed to audiences of thousands and I’ve never once been invited to join a huddle beforehand. Not that I can blame my dancers or crew. I’ve never even bothered to ask them their names.
“Ruby, do you want to say something?” Beth asks, as our team gathers and links together in a circle.
“Actually, I do.” I clear my throat. “Even if this show is a disaster, even if I fall over flat on my face, forget the words or forget how to dance, I’ve had the best time putting this performance together with you all. I’ve often felt like I’m on the sidelines, but this week I didn’t. Thanks so much for letting me be a part of your team.”
“Very cute.” Beth grins. “But try not to fall flat on your face, forget the words or forget how to dance. Let’s smash this.”
Everyone laughs and we break apart to high-five each other before Mrs Jennings comes into the green room and calls Ali’s name. She’s up first.
“Hey, Ali,” I call out as she gets to the door. “Good luck.”
She stops and, for a moment, I think she might turn round and thank me, but she thinks better of it and, holding her chin up high, swans out of the room.
“Aren’t you coming to watch?” Beth asks, as I take a seat. “We’re going to go stand in the wings and check out the competition.”
“I’ll be there in a moment. I want to get myself ready.”
When my team and the other finalists have filed out the room, I take deep breaths in and out, shaking out my hands,
trying to ignore the butterflies flitting about in my stomach. All I want is Mum to be here, giving me one of her pep talks. When I’m in the wings before a big concert, holding the microphone, listening to the crowd chant as they wait for my entrance, she always comes to stand next to me.
“You can do this,” she usually says, squeezing my hand. “Remember, you’re doing what you love.”
I wish I could tell her how much I appreciate her saying stuff like that. I’ve never even thanked her.
I reach to get HOW TO SHINE out of my bag. Mum’s not here but this book has some good words of advice to calm my nerves. My hands are so clammy that as I get the book out, I drop it and it falls to the floor.
I pick it up and as I plonk it on to my lap it falls open on a familiar page:
Sometimes, to learn about yourself, you need a different view. Step into someone else’s shoes, tread in their footsteps, see things through their eyes.
See how you shine.
“Trust me,” I say out loud, “I’ve been there, done that.”
At first, I think I’m imagining it but then it gets clearer and brighter. The book is glowing.
OH MY GOD THE BOOK IS GLOWING! THE BOOK IS GLOWING!
“No, wait, not now! Ruby is meant to be on stage any min—”
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
(AS NAOMI)
I find a deserted table in the back corner of the party, so I can have a moment to myself.
I have been informed by Sam that I’m at an album launch of a singer-songwriter who I apparently don’t like very much.
“Then why am I here?” I asked Sam under my breath after giving the hostess two air kisses and moving into the crowd.
“Because you said it was one of those events that it was important to be seen at,” he explained, checking my schedule for where we were supposed to be going afterwards. “Your mum and Martin should be here somewhere.”
When we couldn’t find them, Sam had disappeared to get me a sparkling elderflower – they were serving sparkling pomegranate, which according to him wasn’t what I wanted – and I scanned the room for a secluded spot to hide in.
I sit down and, after people-watching for a bit, wondering how everyone in this room was so impossibly glamorous, I get HOW TO SHINE out of my bag. I’m so bored; I’d much rather be reading. I accidentally drop the book and hurry to get it up from the floor, worried that I’ve scuffed the pages.
As I pull it up on to my lap, it falls open on to a page I know off by heart:
Sometimes, to learn about yourself, you need a different view. Step into someone else’s shoes, tread in their footsteps, see things through their eyes.
See how you shine.
“Trust me,” I mutter, reading it through and smiling to myself, “I have taken your advice.”
Wait a second . . . is it . . . is it GLOWING? THE BOOK IS GLOWING!
FINALLY!
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Someone is prodding my arm. Hard.
“Really, Naomi,” a voice says in that weary tone I’ve missed so much, “you’ve fallen asleep at someone’s party! With your mouth open and everything.”
It worked. It worked!
I’M BACK!
“MUM!” I shriek, blinking away my blurred vision to see her frowning at me.
I jump up and wrap my arms around her, hugging her so tight and with such force that she stumbles backwards.
“Hey, Mum,” I say, tears running down my face as she hugs me back. “I’ve missed you.”
“What?” She laughs. “I saw you about two hours ago at our perfume meeting.”
“I know,” I say, pulling away and looking up at her. “But it felt like weeks.”
“That’s very sweet of you. Are you all right?” Her eyebrows knit together in concern as she examines my face. “Why are you crying? What’s going on?”
“I’m crying because I’m happy! Because I’m ME! I am me, right? I am Naomi Starr? WHO HAS A MIRROR IN HERE?”
Mum reaches into her handbag and passes me her compact mirror. I open it and, on seeing my reflection, I scream in joy and start dancing on the spot.
“I’m ME! That’s right! I’m me! Wooooooo!” I chant, launching into a spontaneous dance routine around the table. “WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE!”
Mum is staring at me, her eyes as wide as saucers.
“Well, yes, you are you,” she says, baffled. “And you’re great.”
“I’m so happy to be me! And SIMON! No . . . wait . . . SAM! There you are, Sam!” I exclaim, grabbing his hand and jumping up and down on the spot. “Your name is Sam, not Simon. Of course it’s Sam! You look like a Sam! I will never get your name wrong again because I appreciate you and all the work you do. It’s so good to see you!”
“It’s great to see you, too,” he replies, looking a little scared by my outburst. “I brought you your sparkling elderflower.”
“My favourite drink! You are the BEST!”
“What’s going on?” Martin says, appearing behind Mum. “There’s a lot of noise coming from over here.”
“MARTIN! OMG, EVERYBODY, IT’S MARTIN!” I clap my hands together, making everyone jump. “Martin, I’ve missed you and your ridiculous voice!”
“Excuse me?”
“Martin, we have SO much to talk about. Mainly, I want to tell you how excited I am to rehearse with you again. We are going to make our shows bigger and better, and I want to tell you now that I will be completely dedicated. I will be on time and I will work harder than ever before. You, my friend, are a genius choreographer. I don’t say that enough.”
Martin’s face lights up at my words. I’ve never seen him so happy.
“Thank you, Naomi. That means a lot.”
“No, thank YOU! Thanks to all of you, my brilliant team!” I turn back to Mum and give her another hug. “I am so happy to be home!”
“You’re not at home, darling, we’re at a party,” she says, glancing around as people start to stare. “Are you sure everything’s all right?”
“Mum, everything is brilliant and exactly how it should be and . . . wait, what time is it?”
I look around for a handbag and spot one of my designer bags sitting next to my seat. As IF Ruby put my handbags on the floor. She has so much to learn.
I dig around in it and pull out my phone triumphantly.
“Hello, phone! My beautiful, precious phone!” I press it against my cheek affectionately. “I’ve missed you!”
Mum and Martin share a look.
I should rein it in.
“Ali’s set will be finishing up by now! WE HAVE TO GO!” I yell, grabbing my handbag and then Mum’s hand, dragging her through the party and towards the door.
“Wait, Naomi! You’re pulling my arm off!” Mum gasps. “What is going on?”
“A friend needs me right now. A real friend.”
“Who?”
“I’ll explain another time.” I turn to Sam who, as always, appears by my side. “Is Kelly waiting with the car somewhere?”
“She’s parked down the road,” he replies, typing into his phone. “I’ll get her to bring the car to the front now.”
“Thank you, Sam.”
“Naomi, can you tell me what all the fuss is about? You’re acting so strangely!”
“Honestly, Mum, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” I laugh, fishing a pair of sunglasses out from my bag in preparation. “Let’s just say that recently I had the chance to walk in someone else’s shoes and it made me realize a few things. Like, how lucky I am to have such a supportive, understanding family, and how we really need to sit down properly and come to a compromise on scheduling, because we should be having some downtime together, as well as working so hard, and—”
She holds up her hand to stop me from going on. “I know. I’ve been thinking about this ever since you brought it up in Manchester. We should have some more time as a family. You’re absolutely righ
t.”
“I am?” I say, surprised that she’s agreed with me so easily.
“Yes.” She smiles and takes a deep breath. “Look, it’s important to me that you succeed in what you want to do, but it’s much more important that, in whatever you do, you’re happy. I spent most of my life terrified that if I didn’t work hard enough, my career would slip away, and recently I’ve forgotten that you’re not living my career, you’re living yours. And I have a feeling that no matter what, you’re going to be just fine. You’re the biggest star I know.”
I beam up at her. “Wow. Thanks, Mum. To be fair, I learnt from the best.”
She laughs, putting an arm round me and squeezing me close. “Tomorrow, let’s talk about scheduling in some downtime at least once a week. I can’t even remember how to play most board games. I’d like to learn again.”
“Your car is here,” Sam announces, as a member of my security team comes through the doors, ready to escort me back out.
“Show time!” I squeal, putting on my sunglasses. “I have MISSED this!”
The doors fling open and as soon as I step out, the camera flashes of the photographers lined against the roped-off red carpet start going off like crazy.
“HELLO, LONDON!” I cry, waving at the photographers. “It is good to be back!”
Kelly is waiting by the limo and I squeal when I see her.
“Hey, Kelly! Thanks so much for bringing the car round. I have SO many bus stories to tell you,” I inform her, chuckling at her puzzled expression as I slide on to the leather seats. I quickly pull up the armrest to check my bottles of sparkling water are all still there. “Oh, car! I’m so lucky to have you and your clever refrigerator unit! Mum, sit next to me!”
“Where are we going, Miss Starr?” Kelly asks, once Mum, Sam and the bodyguard have climbed in and taken their seats down the side of the limo.
“To Hartfell School, please. As soon as possible.”
“A school? Why on earth are we going to a school? Who is this friend of yours?” Mum asks curiously.
“Her name is Ruby. And she’s about to perform in her school talent show.”
