by Erin Rhew
“I just went crazy at the thought of losing of you, of Vance hurting you. I couldn’t stand it.”
He continued to kiss all around her face and neck. Layla trembled with pleasure. The intensity of his feelings, of his mouth on her, made her weak. For months, she’d dreamed of a stolen moment like this one.
“Nash, I’ve wanted you to hold me and kiss me like this for so long.”
“I’ve wanted to, Layla.” His green eyes blazed. “You don’t know how badly I’ve wanted to.” He kissed her on both cheeks. “But I was afraid if I started, I’d never stop. And I have to stop, Layla. I have to. You’re bound to my brother.”
“But if I weren’t…”
“If you weren’t, I’d never let you go.”
His face transformed. His jaw clenched, and he closed his eyes. When he opened them again, the hard expression he often wore returned. He moved away from her. Layla, aching for his presence, reached up to bring him back, but as he so often did when they sparred, he moved just out of her range.
However, when the door she’d just come out of flew open, Nash moved his body protectively in front of hers. They both squinted in the waning light to identify the person striding toward them. Nash’s hand grazed the hilt of his sword. Though still dazed, Layla assumed a defensive posture, ready to fight if necessary.
“Nash?” Wil whispered his brother’s name.
“Wil?”
Wil’s postured relaxed. “Nash, we’ve got to get you into the tunnels right now.”
“Why?”
“I can’t explain it out here, but you are in grave danger. Father means to throw you into the dungeons. Now please, trust me and go.”
Without another word, the trio raced toward the entrance to the tunnels. Wil went in first, followed by Nash. Nash turned around, grabbed Layla’s hand, and guided her into the maze.
Wil flung open the door to the underground hideout. Vespa jumped, letting out an undignified squeak, and Grant reached for his sword.
“What are you two doing here?” Nash demanded.
Vespa avoided her brother’s gaze. “I snuck Grant in through the maze.”
Nash and Wil blew out frustrated breaths. Layla glared at her brother, who at least had the decency to look sheepish.
Wil closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “You put yourselves, and the rest of us, in great danger.”
Grant stood, his posture repentant. “We know, and we’re sorry.”
“What’s going on?” Vespa’s gaze bounced around between the three of them.
Wil sighed and gestured toward the table. “We should all sit.”
Vespa, Wil, Grant, and Layla took seats, but Nash stood behind Vespa. He tapped his hand against the side of his leg, Layla’s only indication of his distress. She almost placed her own hand on it to still his nervous energy, but refrained. The image of Wil asking for a kiss in the castle hallway, with his eyes so bright and hopeful, held her back from touching Nash in front of him.
“What’s going on?” Nash dug a hand through his hair. Layla’s hands balled into a fist as she forced down her rising panic.
“Father says…” Wil faltered. “He says Nash is to be tried for high treason.”
“What?” Vespa tucked pieces of her hair behind each ear and then reached up to squeeze Nash’s hand.
“High treason?” Nash asked. Foreboding surged through Layla, leaving an icy trail in its wake. The punishment for high treason was death. Death. “Why?” Nash appeared unaffected by the news, but Layla knew better. She knew how Jesper’s actions devastated Nash, yet another rejection. “Because I attacked him in the meeting room?”
“No.” Wil stood and moved beside his brother. He placed a steadying hand on Nash’s shoulder. “Because you are King Rex’s son.”
To Layla’s surprise, Nash laughed. “I’m what? Is this some kind of sick joke, Wil?” He shook off his brother’s hand.
“I’m not joking. Apparently, Mother confessed to it. Father thinks you’ve been sneaking over to the Vanguard side and telling Rex all of our secrets. He said you and Rex must be laughing at him behind his back, and you know how much Father despises the idea of anyone laughing at him.”
“Unbelievable. After I risked my life to gather information that would protect Etherea, Father still believes the worst of me.” Nash sighed. “This can’t be right. I have to speak to Mother at once.”
Layla watched, helpless to offer him comfort, as Nash absorbed the gravity of this revelation. His face flushed and then drained to an ashen color. When Nash walked toward the door, Wil rose to stop him.
“You can’t, Nash. Mother’s been taken to the dungeon. If you try to get to her, Father will have you arrested and thrown in there with her. He plans to try you both on the charge of high treason.” Wil’s own face lost color. “That’s punishable by death. You know Father will find you guilty.”
“What do you suggest I do then?” A hurt, angry sarcasm tinged his words.
Nash looked toward Layla. She gave him a reassuring smile but feared it looked more like a grimace. His green eyes sparked with unspoken angst. She longed to take him in her arms as he’d done earlier with her.
“You have to run.” Wil set his jaw.
“Where would I run?”
“To Rex. To your father.”
“Are you crazy, Wil?”
“Brother, hear me out…I have been thinking about it since Father first told me. You are a son of King Rex, just like Vance. If you were able to get into their dungeons and free your father, the people may rally behind you. One day, perhaps you could even sit on the Vanguard throne. If we could both rule, this peace that the Ecclesiastics speak of could really happen. We could make it happen.” He glanced back at Layla. “All of us together.”
Nash shook his head. “You’ve always been a dreamer, Wil. Fantasies aside, do you honestly think I can pull off a rescue mission and a coup? It sounds like a suicide to me. ”
“If anyone can do it, you can. You’re the best fighter I’ve ever seen, Vanguard or otherwise.” Wil’s words inspired Layla. His absolute confidence in his brother and in their ability to prevail despite the odds resonated with the piece of her that needed to believe they all served a true purpose.
Grant rose. “I will go with you, Nash. There are many men who are unhappy under Vance’s rule. If we could find them and free King Rex, we could stop Vance’s tyrannical reign.”
Vespa overturned her chair in her haste to grab her lover’s arm. “Grant…”
“Vespa, I love you, but I have to do this. I have to protect you and the Vanguards. They are my people. I simply can’t stand by while Vance brings them to ruin, and after listening in on his last meeting, I know for a fact that he’s coming after you and your people. I won’t let that happen. As long as Vance is alive, he’s a threat to everyone and everything I care about.” He turned to Nash. “I’m with you if you need me.”
Nash sighed. He managed to look both defeated and encouraged. “If I’m going to attempt such a mission, I’ll need all the help I can get.”
Layla squirmed in her seat. She wanted to go with Nash and fight alongside him. If she were with him, at least she’d keep an eye on his safety, but she knew she couldn’t go. Instead, she’d be forced to wait in the castle day and night, wondering. The idea didn’t sit well with her. Vanguards fought—they didn’t pine away hidden behind a barrier.
So many unspoken words lay suspended between them, so much she needed to say to Nash. Would she even have the opportunity, or would he ride off leaving their relationship unresolved? She twisted her hands beneath the table, her anxiety spinning along with each twist and turn. Nash’s life depended on his escape. The rest would just have to wait.
Wil nodded to Grant and Nash. “Look, I’ll gather as many supplies as I can from the castle. Grant and Vespa, you search all the rooms here in the tunnels. One of them used to be an armory. If you find it, grab as many weapons as you can carry. We’ll all meet back here at ni
ghtfall. Nash and Grant should leave soon after, under the cover of darkness.” In that moment, Layla saw the commanding king Wil would one day be. They all stared at him in wonder.
“What about me?” Layla stood, ready to assist.
Wil’s lips pursed together. “You stay here with Nash for now. Father is on a rampage. There’s no telling what he will do if he finds you.”
Layla stood. Stay with Nash? Though every part of her wanted to, she knew she couldn’t trust herself if she did.
“I could go with you.” She smiled at Wil. Nash shuffled his feet.
“I have a better chance of remaining undetected if I’m alone. I promise to be back quickly.” Wil returned her smile with a huge one of his own, misinterpreting her trepidation as concern for him instead of anxiety over being left alone with Nash. A pang of guilt jarred her.
“Okay.” She swallowed down the bulbous lump forming in her throat.
Within minutes, everyone else shuffled out the door, leaving Nash and Layla alone. He moved over to sit on the bed, putting as much space between them as possible.
Sitting in silence proved torturous. “What are you thinking about?” Layla asked.
He lifted his head, meeting her gaze. “I can’t believe it. I mean, now that I think about what Wil said, it makes sense. I have dark hair and excessive strength like a Vanguard, and while I can perform Alterations, I can’t do them nearly as well as my siblings. I just can’t understand why my mother would hide my paternity from me all these years…And my father, Rex, I wonder if he even knows about me.” She caught the speck of hope when he spoke of his father. She prayed for the First Ones to have mercy on Nash and allow him to find in Rex what Jesper lacked.
“Maybe she wanted to protect you. Or maybe she didn’t know herself.”
He frowned, his eyebrows wedged together. “How could she not know?”
“Wil told me parents have nearly unlimited control over their children’s minds. Maybe your grandfather or grandmother locked away your mother’s memories. I mean, Ethereals can do that, right? I’ve heard Wil and Vespa mention Locks.”
He shrugged. “Yes, there are Locks. I guess it’s possible.”
“And if she doesn’t know, maybe Rex doesn’t either.”
They fell silent. Layla concentrated on her fingers, keeping her eyes down. Though she wanted to stare at him, memorizing every inch of his exquisite face before he left, Layla trained her eyes on a spot of dirt beneath her nails. She longed to wrap him up in her arms and shut out the rest of the world, to comfort him as he processed the monumental revelation. Instead, she remained seated, watching that speck of dirt like it held the answers to all the world’s questions.
“Do you think I can really do this, Layla?” Her head snapped up. “I mean, I don’t know how I’m going to get in that dungeon in the first place. And even if I do, what if Rex doesn’t believe me? Jesper hates me, why wouldn’t Rex?”
Throwing caution to the wind, Layla rushed over and knelt in front of him.
“Nash, your father will acknowledge you as his son, and he will love you. You’re amazing in so many ways. Jesper was an idiot not to see how special you are, but I have faith that King Rex will. I’ve met him, and you’re actually a lot alike—strong and fierce but ultimately kind.”
Nash’s tortured expression tore at her. When he brought a shaking finger to her face, tracing the side of her cheek, she shivered at the pleasure his touch always brought.
“Thank you, Layla.”
She placed her hand over his. “You’re strong and smart, Nash. Remember that Vance is wild and reckless. You can use his arrogance against him.”
“I’ll try to make you proud, Layla.”
“You already do.”
She leaned into him, pressing her face against his stomach. He held her, stroking her hair. She closed her eyes, listening to the beat of his heart.
“Come with me.” He murmured the words against her ear, his breath rushing down her neck.
Layla jerked her head up to look into his eyes. His earnest gaze told her he meant it, but then his face crumpled.
“No, ignore that. Your life would be in danger. I couldn’t risk it. I guess I’m just saying I wish you could be with me. I don’t…I don’t want to leave you.”
She took his hands in hers. “I don’t want you to leave, Nash.”
Layla stood and walked over to the table, overwhelmed by the strength of her feelings for him. He could die on this mission. Tears welled in her eyes at the thought. A life without Nash would be no life at all.
It wasn’t fair for her to feel that way. She’d been bound to Wil, and he’d been nothing but wonderful. He didn’t deserve to have a wife that pined for another man. Yet, she did. She ached for Nash with every fiber of her being.
“If I weren’t bound, Nash…if I were truly free to choose.” She faced him.
“Layla.” His plea held warning and longing. “Don’t. Please.”
“I would choose you, Nash.”
She heard the soft hitch in his throat. “Oh, Layla.”
“I couldn’t let you leave without telling you that.”
She choked back the tears that threatened to fall. He rose but didn’t move forward. They stared at one another from across the room. She wanted to run to him and take shelter in the warmth of his embrace, but she stayed rooted in place.
“Kiss me, Nash. Please…”
He drew in a deep breath. She thought for a moment he wouldn’t cross the invisible barrier between them. Then Nash strode across the room and crushed his lips to hers. All the pent up emotion they’d been suppressing came rushing out in that one moment. Their mouths met again and again in a frenzied passion, unable to get enough of one another. He picked her up, and she wrapped her legs possessively around his waist. Nash staggered backward toward the bed, turned them around, and lay her down. Breaking the kiss for a heartbeat, he stared into her eyes. She pulled him closer, unable to stand any distance between them. With their faces just inches apart, he beheld her with unmatched adoration. Nash pushed back her hair.
“I love you, Layla.”
“I love you too, Nash.”
They smiled, lost in one another, lost in this secret passion that refused to be contained. Not willing to be disconnected from him any longer, Layla tugged his mouth down upon hers. Intense pleasure pulsated throughout her body. He consumed her whole being, shutting out everything else. Nothing else mattered but him—his lips against her lips, his hands in her hair—right here, right now.
Neither heard the door when it opened, but Wil’s sharp intake of breath drew them apart. They turned as one to find the prince frozen in the doorframe. He looked back and forth between them as if comprehending the scene before him.
Layla slammed her hand against her mouth, shrieking his name. “Wil.”
“Don’t.” She shuddered at the sound of his heartache. Without another word, he walked out.
Chapter Eighteen
Layla
Layla stumbled through the dimly lit hallways following the sound of Wil’s retreating footsteps. She could hear his ragged breathing, and she recognized the sound as pain, not exertion. Guilt and remorse burrowed a gaping hole in the middle of her chest. She clamped her fist against it, a vain attempt to hold in the horror threatening to spill out. She loved Nash, but she never meant to hurt Wil.
“Wil.” She squinted as she burst into the blinding sunlight.
He didn’t respond to her call. He kept on running as far from her as he could get. Layla sighed, hiked up her skirts, and continued after him.
“Wil. Please.” She tried to garner his attention again once they reached the courtyard.
This time, he stopped and faced her. The raw torment in his eyes chilled her.
“Wil.” His name came out as a sob.
“I’m a fool. I thought we had something. How could I have been so blind?” He ran his fingers through his hair, squeezing the strands until his hands shook.
“We
do have something, Wil. I am bound to you, predetermined to be your bride by the First Ones….”
“So you feel a responsibility toward me?” He spat out the words. She hadn’t meant for it to come out that way. Instead of making the situation better, she made it worse. To see Wil, always calm and collected, so unraveled frightened her. Shame overtook her, spreading its piercing tentacles throughout her body until she burned from her transgression.
“How long has it been this way, Layla? Have you and Nash been sneaking around this whole time, laughing at what a fool I’ve been?”
“No. ” The answer caught in her throat. While they hadn’t been sneaking around, laughing at Wil, their feelings had begun before she met the future king. She looked down at her hands. “Nash saved me from Prince Vance’s men when they ambushed my carriage on my way here. I didn’t know who he was, and he didn’t know who I was. We’ve tried to stay apart, to fight our feelings, because we both care so much about you.”
He let out a disbelieving snort. “So, I never had a chance, did I?”
“We were only saying goodbye to one another, Wil. We both know that we can’t be together. It isn’t meant to be. Just one moment, that’s all we gave each other.”
Wil took a deep breath and righted himself. “Do you love him?”
“Wil.” She touched her neck, strangled, an invisible noose tightening the longer she stood before him.
“Don’t lie to me to spare my feelings. I want to know the truth. Do you love him?”
“Yes.” She hung her head. Layla’s hair fell around her like a veil and shielded her from his sight. He never spoke, but the intensity of his stare percolated around the edges of her hideout. Her Vanguard nature clawed its way to the surface, and she raised her head. Their gazes met.
“I came to the tunnels to get you because my mother wants to see you. I’ve made sure you will be safe coming and going to meet with her.”
The gap between them widened. Layla sensed it like a physical presence. With his message delivered, Wil walked into the castle, leaving her staring at his retreat.
