Second Chance Hero

by Shelley Calloway

  In return, he told Remy about his parents and their love for each other. And about how he couldn’t abide spinach.

  She mentioned that she happened to love vanilla ice cream and ripe peaches in the summer. And how she’d never been able to say no to a new shade of lipstick.

  He told her he liked kissing her lips, no matter what shade they were.

  By the time Remy guided the car off the path and into the parking lot adjacent to the pro shop, Tyler felt as if he’d known her forever.

  HAD THINGS BEEN SO EASY with Mark? Remy couldn’t remember. They’d dated for years, and had the type of easy relationship that had stood up to a great many obstacles. Underneath all that romantic love was a deep, all-encompassing respect for each other. And friendship. With Tyler, everything was happening in a rush. So fast, she didn’t want to be without him. It was almost as if she couldn’t bear to even look away from him. And that’s when Remy knew she’d fallen in love. Knew she was finally ready for anything in their relationship.

  She’d enjoyed watching him traipse across the course, so confident and sure of himself in his bright white golf shirt. She liked how he made each shot with precision, but didn’t really seem to care what his score was.

  She liked his compliments and the way he always seemed to make her feel like the prettiest girl in the room.

  After placing his clubs in his trunk, he said, “You up for some dinner? There’s a place near my condo that has great fish tacos.”

  “I’d love to go there. If you let me see your place.”

  “It’s nothing fancy,” he warned. “It’s just a two-bedroom condo.”

  “I don’t need fancy.”

  Twenty minutes later they arrived at his condo. She couldn’t help but tease him as she looked around. “This sure is some shack. It’s gorgeous.”

  “Oh, well, I’ve been redecorating a little bit.”

  “A little?” She pointed to the pewter clock and the antique surfboard hanging over the fireplace. At the arrangement of black-and-white photos of the area, each encased in silver frames and mounted against a background of butterscotch wall. “You just threw this all together?”

  He shrugged good-naturedly. “Well, actually, I did have some help. Cindy has a neighbor who’s an interior designer. She brought over a couple of things to see if I’d like them. I did.”

  Remy couldn’t help but run her hand along the copper-colored leather couch. “I do, too.”

  “I’m glad. Actually, I do have a secret. I was hoping one day you would come over. And if you did, I didn’t want there to be anything that you might find fault with.”

  “Because?”

  “Just because. How about we keep it at that?” After showing her the guest bedroom, laundry room and back screen porch, he shrugged. “Are you ready to walk down to the taco place?”

  “Almost. You haven’t shown me your bedroom.”

  When he hesitated, she tugged on his hand. “I know what I’m asking, Tyler,” she murmured.

  “You sure?”

  “Positive.”

  “All right, then.” When he linked his fingers through hers and tugged, she followed him gladly. Finally she was at peace with both her past and the present, and more than eager to share her body with him.

  However, all thoughts of romance were pushed to one side when he pushed open a pair of white French doors. “Oh, my.”

  “Meredith said this was her crowning achievement.”

  “I can see why. Tyler, this is beautiful. I’ve never seen a room done in shades of brown and light blue before.” She pointed to the bay window, dressed in luxurious panels of nubby silk that gathered at the floor, to the dark brown rattan chair next to a reading table. At the charcoal etchings of sailboats. “It looks like something out of a magazine.”

  “Like I said, I had some help.” When she looked around the room again, he stepped in front of her so she couldn’t see anything but him. “You know, I brought you here with the most innocent of reasons.”

  “But now?”

  “Now that you’re sure…” His gaze turned sheepish. “How about we admire the room another day?”

  She blinked, daring to tease. “What room?” She rested her palms on his chest. “All I see is you.”

  “Good answer.” Strong arms circling her, he smiled. And then, before she could comment on that, he lowered his head and kissed her. Once again everything else faded away.

  Remy couldn’t help but shudder in anticipation as their lips met, then explored and meshed. Oh, but she loved feeling his arms around her. Tyler had the best shoulders—his muscles were so defined and perfect. His chest was firm and smooth and solid. As she rose on her tiptoes and pressed a little closer, his hands grasped her hips. She buried her face in his shoulder as his tongue traced a line down her throat.

  Time blurred as desire intensified. She moaned as their kisses slowed and hands roamed. Remy found herself eager to match each of his movements with a brush of her lips and bolder caresses.

  Oh, Tyler felt so good, and everything about him was perfect. In no time at all she’d pulled his knit golf shirt over his head and run her hands along his pectorals, enjoying how his muscles responded to her touch.

  “Your turn,” he murmured, sliding down the straps of her sundress. The wisp of her bra went next. With a shake of her hips, the rest of her dress slipped to the floor. Soon his shorts lay on the carpet, too.

  And her panties.

  As his gaze skimmed her body, Remy had never felt more beautiful. Everything in his gaze showed her his approval. Skin met bare skin as they embraced again, feeling so delicious. Feeling so empowering.

  Moments later Tyler paused for a breath. “Bed.”

  She chuckled as he tossed back the comforter and sheets and tugged her forward. Smiling, Remy joined him on the cool cotton. As he moved to partially cover her body with his, she felt herself shiver. And then there was little time to think as they began to explore again. Touching, getting reacquainted. Touching and testing.

  Just as things were about to spiral out of control, Tyler groaned. “Sorry. I almost forgot,” he said sheepishly as he pulled open his bedside table’s drawer and took out a square packet.

  She blinked in surprise. After she and Mark had found out she couldn’t bear children, she’d pretty much forgotten about the need for birth control.

  As she saw him rip open the square and sheath himself, she almost told him there was no need. But then she reminded herself it would be best to be careful. Tyler had obviously led a full life before she came along.

  Through the curtains, tiny lights began to sprinkle the horizon as the evening lights flickered on. In Tyler’s room Remy fought for control as their kisses built in intensity, as featherlight touches turned demanding.

  And then, with one thrust, he was inside her and she wrapped her legs around his hips. But Remy was scarcely aware of anything except how dark his eyes looked as they stared into hers.

  How wonderful his lips were when they smiled.

  And how incredibly perfect the moment was between them. So real. So special.

  This was right. She was in love. Everything was perfect, and she hoped this wonderful, wonderful feeling would go on forever.

  Chapter Twenty

  “So, one day, how many kids do you want to have?” Tyler asked lazily around midnight. Right after they’d taken a slow, hot shower together and found their way back to his bed.

  “Children?” In an instant her body stiffened. When he raised an eyebrow in question, she fought for control, forced herself to relax. “Oh, I don’t know.”

  “Remy? You’re all tense. Come here, baby. What you need is a back rub.”

  What she needed was to be talking about anything but kids. But she kept silent as he moved to the side, guiding her to lie on her stomach.

  After rubbing his hands together to warm them up, he gently began to knead her shoulders, stopping for a moment to carefully push her mass of hair to one side. “Feel good?”<
br />
  She couldn’t lie. “Feels great. Ooh, don’t stop.”

  Tyler gave her a little pat. “I’ll rub your back as long as you want me to.”

  Her eyes drifted closed as he massaged the skin along her spine, stopping every so often to press his lips to places his fingers had just vacated. Her body began to buzz again as his hands drifted lower.

  Perhaps they’d just make love again. They didn’t need to talk.…

  But Tyler obviously didn’t feel the same way. “Come on,” he murmured just as he shifted closer, leaning down to playfully nip her earlobe. “Everyone thinks about babies. Have you ever thought about what you’ll look like, all beautiful and pregnant?” He chuckled as he circled his arms around her rib cage and found her breasts.

  As his fingers located her nipples, as her body responded to his touch, her mind froze. “No…”

  He nipped gently on the back of her neck. “Would you be mad if I said I have? You’re going to be gorgeous. I won’t be able to keep my hands off you.”

  He paused, then kissed the back of her neck some more, just as his hands drifted lower. To her belly. “All right, honey,” he murmured. “We don’t have to talk about babies. Not yet.”

  The idea that she would never be able to be pregnant, that she’d never be able to give him what he wanted, made her run cold. With a jerk, she pulled away from the protective warmth of his arms. “I…I don’t want to talk about babies.”

  “What?” He smiled. “Am I making you nervous? Don’t be, Remy. I’ve got a whole box of protection. And…I know we don’t need to be in a hurry.” He shrugged. “I’m just looking forward to the day you’re pregnant.” His eyes darkened. “To the day we bring home a little sweetheart who looks just like you.”

  She swallowed. That was a nice fantasy.

  But as she stared at him, as she saw the longing in his eyes, she couldn’t bear to tell him the truth. Couldn’t bear to say that what he wanted was never going to happen.

  It made her too ashamed.

  So she hardened her voice. “If you want to know the truth, I never think about having any kids.”

  He stilled. “What? You’re kidding, right?”

  “No, I’m not.”

  Hurt and something harder filled his eyes. “Why not? Is it because of your work? You’re the boss. I’m sure they’ll give you time off. And we could make things work out. All working mothers do these days.”

  “No, it’s not that.” She sat up a little more and pulled the sheet over her breasts, needing some kind of defense against his questioning gaze. “It’s…it’s because I don’t think I’ll ever have any.”

  Something fell from his expression. “Why?”

  She heard the accusation in his tone and felt lower than ever. She hated admitting her faults. Hated that she had no control over her infertility.

  Hated that Tyler was looking at her in the way he was. But because she loved him—wow, what a time to realize that—she decided he deserved the truth. The terrible, awful truth. “I had a pretty severe case of endometriosis in my twenties. I can’t have children.”

  Though pride forced her to keep her head high—her physical problems were no fault of her own—inside, she wanted to hang her head in shame. No matter what the doctors said, not being able to bear children felt like an unbearable flaw.

  But instead of giving her comfort, of saying that he understood, he fired another question. “Did you get a second opinion?”

  “There was no second opinion to get. I was sick. My treatment was a trade-off—the result left me infertile. I knew it. Mark knew it. And, well, he understood.”

  A muscle jumped in his jaw at Mark’s name. Remy couldn’t blame his reaction. She’d definitely thrown in her husband’s name on purpose. Mark had been by her side when she’d first received the life-changing news. Mark had held her for hours while she’d cried.

  Still staring at her in wonder, Tyler shook his head. “Remy, I had no idea you couldn’t have children.”

  “It’s okay. I like kids, but I’ve resigned myself to never having to make lunches for a crowd or to have to watch hours of cartoons.” Inside, Remy winced. She’d intentionally made her words more superficial than she felt. But that was what she had to do.

  Otherwise, even after all this time, she’d start crying.

  Little by little she felt Tyler pull away, physically and emotionally. A minute later he slipped on boxers and a T-shirt and walked to the other side of the room. “I’m really surprised, Remy. I mean, I know you’re forty-two, but it never occurred to me that you didn’t have children because you couldn’t have any. I thought it all had to do with Mark being sick.”

  Chilled, she pulled his comforter closer. “I…I know it’s hard news to hear. But the good news is that other than that, I’m okay.” She attempted to smile, but feared she merely looked sickly. “I just can’t have any babies.”

  “But I really want children.” With stiff movements he picked up his shorts and stepped into them. “I always have.”

  “I hadn’t ‘planned’ on getting endometriosis, Tyler.”

  He ran a hand through his hair. “Maybe now things are different.” With a gleam of hope, he said, “I’ll call up Cindy’s OB. She said he’s great. I bet he’ll know what you can do.”

  “No. There’s nothing to do.” She was hurt. He was acting as if she’d celebrated her physical state, when in fact, she’d done nothing of the sort. She’d only stated the facts…very reluctantly, too.

  When he turned away, Remy slipped out of bed, hurriedly yanked on her underwear and fastened her bra. Then, feeling terribly exposed, she grabbed the rest of her clothes and strode to his bathroom. “I’ll be out in a sec,” she mumbled. “I just need a few moments to…” To what? Will herself not to burst into tears?

  But even though she didn’t finish the sentence, it didn’t really matter—he obviously wasn’t in the room any longer.

  HE’D BEEN PACING the living room since he’d left the bed. Rarely before had he felt so conflicted. Usually he came to a decision, made it and then moved on.

  That was the way to do things. That was the way to succeed. It had always worked before—in business and in his personal life. No sense making things more difficult than they had to be. No sense in prolonging problems.

  But now it was different. He cared about her. From the moment he’d seen her photo and had read the biography, he’d known there was something special about her.

  As they’d gotten to know each other, he’d become even more sure. With Remy, their differences didn’t matter. He didn’t care what she did, or if some people thought he was too young for her. All he’d cared about was the certainty in his heart that she was special. That they were special together.

  And all those feelings had come about before they’d even slept together! And that…well, that had been great.

  Now he was getting his just deserts, and that was a fact. Now he knew what it felt like to love someone but for it still not to be enough. It was hard and it was emotional, but he had only himself to blame.

  He’d walked into their relationship with a whole perception about Ramona Greer in his head. Once more, even after discovering a number of new things about her, he still had never second-guessed his other assumptions. He should have asked more questions. He should have asked her what her personal goals were, how she saw herself living in two, five, ten years. Maybe he should have interviewed her the way she’d interviewed him.

  But he hadn’t. He’d just fallen in love with her while imagining she wanted the same things he did. He couldn’t have been more wrong.

  She didn’t ever plan to be a mother. Didn’t ever plan on building a swing set or sitting through soccer tryouts. She wasn’t looking forward to barbecues and car trips and noisy dinners and homework sessions. Ever.

  If he stayed with her, there’d never be Tonka trucks to trip over or Sesame Street blaring in the living room. No Barbies or stuffed teddy bears or sweet hugs or the sloppy baby k
isses Megan and April greeted him with.

  No Halloween costumes or cookies for Santa, either. No tooth fairies or Easter bunnies.

  None of the dreams he’d clung to ever since his parents had died. None of the things he’d sworn he’d do because he hadn’t done enough of them with his mom.

  He couldn’t say goodbye to it all. Not yet. Not at thirty-four.

  When she made an appearance, he paused midstep, then forced himself to keep his expression neutral as he turned to face her. “Do you have your jacket?”

  “Yes.” Her bottom lip trembled. “I think you need to take me home. Now.”

  “All right, but first we should talk.”

  Looking stricken, she shook her head. “I’d rather not.”

  “It won’t take long.” When she laid her jacket on the back of a chair, he steeled himself to just tell her the truth. Waiting wouldn’t make things easier. “Remy, there’s no other way to say this.…”

  “Then just say it.”

  “All right. I think we better break things off.”

  “Permanently?”

  Although what he was doing hurt like hell, he forced himself to slowly nod. She blinked back a tear, causing another one to escape. His stomach knotted. Tyler forced himself to shift his gaze, to stare at the wall right to her left. She deserved his explanation, but it wasn’t easy.

  “You don’t want to see me anymore…because I can’t have kids?”

  He felt horrible. But knowing how terrible he’d feel years from now…how much he’d grow to resent their childless state, how crushed he would be to never hold a child of his own, he hardened his heart. “Don’t make it sound like this is easy for me. Listen, I care about you. I think I was falling in love with you, but I don’t know if I can handle this. I came here to Destin to get married and start a family. It’s important to me.”

  She winced. “I see.”