by S. L. Naeole
“I can’t let you leave, Grace. School is still in session. You’ll have to wait until the end of the day,” she insisted, raising her arm up to block my exit.
My eyes flicked to Robert’s and then back at hers. “I don’t think so.”
Robert’s hand reached beneath her arm and grabbed mine, quickly pulling me through the small opening between the door frame and her waist. The movement was so brisk, she didn’t have time to do anything but flinch away.
I was whisked into Robert’s arms, his silent thoughts confirming what I had already guessed and I nodded when he asked me if I would leave with him.
“Thank you for the talk, Mrs. Deovolente,” I called out as she grew smaller behind me. “I’ll see you on Monday!”
As we approached the front doors of the school, Lark and Graham stood there waiting, Lark’s face looking as distraught as an angel’s possibly could, and she held onto Graham’s hand fiercely, the pain obvious on his face, but overshadowed by his own concern for her.
“What happened?”
My question had Graham immediately looking away, while Lark’s expression grew annoyed. “You couldn’t keep your mouth shut, that’s what happened.”
“Lark,” Robert said softly. “She’s not like other humans—keeping secrets and telling lies is difficult for her, you know that. She feels badly enough about this as it is. Don’t make things worse.”
Lark’s features grew softer as she acknowledged her brother’s words. “Did you tell her?” she asked Robert, and then shook her head. “No, you didn’t. Who then?”
“Sean,” I answered. “He found me in Mrs. Deovolente’s classroom.”
“Who?” Both Graham and Lark looked at me, puzzled. Robert’s head twitched at the unasked question.
“She’s the new psychology teacher in room one-forty-three. I met her a few days ago when I was-” I turned to look at Robert and sighed “-running away from my problems. Sean came in and told me about Stacy, told me that it was my fault.”
“That’s not all he said,” Lark scowled, her eyes narrow slits of anger as she sifted through my thoughts.
“That little jerkoff,” Graham snapped, his head popping up. “He’s never liked me, I know that much, but to say that to you—he’s asking for it.”
I glared at Lark as her intrusion became known. “Was that necessary?”
“Yes, it was,” she said stubbornly, her chin tilting up in defiance. “You’re too damn nice to have told us what happened, and what he said would have eaten away at you. You know that, Grace.”
Robert wedged himself Lark and me, and spoke calmly, his words for her but his eyes only for me. “What was said to Grace was for her ears only until she felt comfortable enough to tell us. Now is not the time to go digging for information; Stacy is on her way to the hospital and she needs the people that care about her to be with her.”
Graham nodded solemnly and Lark turned her head away, too ashamed to look at me to say anything. Robert shook his head at the gravity of the situation and then looked into my eyes, his own soft with concern and remorse, his voice low and gentle. “Do you want to go with Graham and Lark? I’ll understand if you do-”
“I’ll ride with you,” I said before my mind ran through all of the reasons why I shouldn’t. It surprised me, but not as much as it surprised him.
“Wait here.” He left before I could respond, and I knew it would be mere moments before he returned, his speed hindered only by the limits of the bike. I felt the gazes of Graham and Lark on me and I tried to avoid making eye contact with them, not sure if I wanted to discuss this new development with them or not, but knowing that now wasn't the time. I wasn’t exactly sure if I wanted to even admit that it was happening.
“It’s nothing big, Grace. It’s just a ride, calm down,” Lark reassured me, and I groaned.
“You’re in my head again,” I complained. “Could you stop doing that? I mean, just for a little while?”
She held her hands up in a conciliatory manner, a passive smile on her face. “I’m sorry.”
“Are you going to be alright?” Graham asked, his eyes traveling from me to the parking lot. “I mean, you’re not exactly going to have anywhere to go once you’re on the back of his bike.”
“I’ll be fine,” I insisted, hiding the slight twinge of uncertainty behind a thin-lipped smile.
The sound of the motorcycle pulling up to the front steps killed any further chance at conversation, and I looked at the small space on the seat behind Robert, suddenly unsure of myself.
“How did you do it the first time?” Graham asked as he stood behind me, his hand at the small of my back.
“What?” I asked, confused by his question.
“The first time you rode with him; you didn’t even know his name but you got on the back of his bike. How did you do it?”
I shrugged. “I just did. I guess I didn’t really think I had much to lose; you were with Erica and pretending that I didn’t exist; Dad wasn’t too happy with me; I had just made a complete fool of myself.”
“So what’s stopping you now?” he said in a low voice.
“I’m afraid,” I answered truthfully.
“Of what?”
“Of what it means.”
He pressed the side of his head against mine and sighed. “What if it doesn’t have to mean anything?”
I nodded in understanding and took a deep breath. As I exhaled, my feet began to pull me forward and I blindly followed, not stopping to think once until I felt my arms wrap around Robert’s waist and the wind began to whip my hair behind me.
Inexplicably, I felt my head lower until it rested against the back of Robert’s leather jacket. I inhaled the scent and relaxed, closing my eyes to everything and enjoying this piece of calm, if only for a moment.
MELODY
There were eleven of us in that emergency waiting room, seven on one side, four on the other, like two warring factions kept apart by some invisible wall. Sean had repeated his tale to his parents and older brothers with great embellishment, and I tried my best to blend into the furniture as seven pairs of eyes bored holes into me, anger and frustration occupying so much space around me I found it difficult to breathe.
When a nurse came out with paperwork for Stacy’s parents to fill out, I sighed with relief—the loss of two pairs of eyes was like a fifty pound weight being lifted off of my chest—and I watched as Stacy’s brothers began to fidget in their seats, too bored with simply staring me down in hopes that I’d leave now to remain still.
As the nurse walked away, her hospital clogs making distinct squishing sounds on the linoleum, a familiar face appeared to speak to Stacy’s family. His smile was warm, his demeanor calm as he explained in a quiet voice that Stacy had passed out due to exhaustion and dehydration. He lowered his voice to whisper confidentially to her parents that she admitted to doing far more physical activity than she had been letting on, and that she wasn’t getting as much sleep at night, which resulted in the exhaustion, which in turn significantly lessened her appetite by inducing serious recurring bouts of nausea, leading to the dehydration.
The next few lines sealed the Kim’s family opinion of me as the doctor said gravely, “With all of the tests and the procedures she's had to go through these past few months, not to mention upcoming finals and graduation, she’s experienced a lot of strain and that has only exacerbated the situation. I suggest you keep things at home as stress free as possible for the next few days, and minimize anything that might upset her.”
As if on cue, seven fierce stares zeroed in on me as if I had a large bulls-eye painted on my face and I looked away, ashamed. A hand reached over to cover mine, offering a measure of support and comfort. I followed it to Robert, who was staring back at the Kims, his face rigid.
I flexed my fingers and smiled when his fell through the spaces, weaving between mine with a familiar ease. He eyed Stacy’s brothers, his gaze lingering on Sean, and I saw his brow furrow in frustration at whatever
it was that he found in Sean’s thoughts.
He leaned his head to the side, closer to my own, and I felt the words flow from his mind into my own, like water pouring from a pitcher into a waiting glass.
He’s abnormally angry, but his anger was misdirected. He’s closest to Stacy because of their bond in the womb and he feels guilty that he’s healthy while she’s not. He doesn’t know how to express this without lashing out. It’s difficult to feel anything but pity for him when I see how anguished he is over what he said to you.
My focus switched to Stacy’s other brothers and I saw the look of sympathy on their faces as they watched their parents receive all of the instructions for caring for Stacy. The paperwork that seemed endless kept appearing, handed to them by one nurse after the other; this was followed by several white paper bags filled with prescriptions.
It was an hour later when Stacy appeared, wheeled in by Dr. Ambrose. He smiled painfully at me and nodded in acknowledgement of Robert. I gave him a half-hearted smile and looked at Stacy, shocked by her sickly appearance. She had grown paler since third period, her skin taking on an almost waxy look.
“She’s going to need a lot of rest, and no visitors,” he insisted. “There should be no lasting effects as long as you minimize the activities for a little while.”
Stacy’s head lifted at this and she asked in a weak voice, “What about school?”
“Sun-hi!” I heard Stacy’s mother hiss, and Stacy’s head whipped around to face her mother, her eyes narrowed in anger.
“I’m not going to give up on living, Mom. I told you this already. I don’t have much time left. Do you want me to spend it living up to my name or living period?”
Dr. Ambrose clucked in disapproval and rested a hand on Stacy’s shoulder, his annoyed gaze focused on Stacy’s family. “This is exactly what I was talking about, Mr. and Mrs. Kim. Stacy needs your support now, not your reproach.”
Stacy sank deeply into the wheelchair, her head falling into a limp hand. “It doesn’t matter what you say, doctor. My mother doesn’t care about what I want or what I need. She only cares about what her friends think, where I fit on the social scale of their daughters. As long as I meet her goals, it won’t matter what happens to me.”
A sharp intake of breath, followed by several voices all speaking at once in two different languages soon filled the waiting room. Stacy’s mother and father began to yell at Dr. Ambrose while Stacy’s brothers all stood up and began shouting to have their voices and opinions heard.
Beneath the canopy they all formed, Stacy sat helpless, her face long and forlorn, her body hunched in defeat. I looked over at Lark who didn’t have to look at me to know what I was thinking. Robert’s hand gripped mine tightly, and I waited patiently as Graham stood up and began heading towards the exit. Lark remained seated until the shouting grew more heated. Then she was gone.
And so was Stacy.
Robert squeezed my hand in warning, and then I felt myself being lifted, the movement so gentle, if not for the blurred lines and the colors of my surroundings melding into each other like some impressionist painting, I’d have thought everything was moving at a normal pace.
The hold that Robert had on me was light, yet secure and overwhelmingly protective as the florescent lighting soon gave way to actual sunshine, the stale, cleanser scented air dissipating into the sweet fragrance of cut grass and spring blossoms.
It was all over far sooner than I probably would have admitted I liked, and my feet were soon placed on sturdy ground, the surroundings the familiar living room of Robert’s home.
“They’ll be here in ten minutes,” he said softly as he helped me to sit down. “They’re traveling in Graham’s car so that figure is quite optimistic.”
I felt the pull of a smile on my lips and I turned away so that he wouldn’t see it. “I’d say twenty then—thirty if he realizes he’s hungry.”
A quiet chuckle pushed the corners of my mouth up even further and I felt a strange uneasiness about it. “Grace, it’s okay. We’re not here for us. We can just focus on Stacy, okay?”
I nodded and pondered why I suddenly felt so disappointed. I didn’t get much chance to wonder, however, when the sound of something dying drew our attention. Robert flashed to the door, his movement so quick it seemed as though he just vanished and reappeared fifteen feet away from me. He pushed aside the curtain that shielded the side glass paneling and grinned profusely at what he saw.
The door opened and Lark and Graham walked in, Lark carrying a very exhausted Stacy in her arms. “I’m going to put her up in my room,” she informed us as she made her way past us and up the stairs.
Graham’s eyes turned towards the door at the still rumbling vehicle parked outside. His bottom lip jutted out in a well-formed pout as he watched his car stutter and stumble while it emitted the last cries of a dying mechanical animal. I watched his shoulders slowly sink, the car giving one last turnover before falling silent. I walked over to him, wrapping my arm around his waist and hugging him in comfort.
“I didn’t want to push her. I knew she wouldn’t be able to handle it,” he moaned, his grief so acute, one would have thought that he’d just lost a family member or something. “Lark insisted on driving, and then she just resorted to pushing. It was too much for the Skylark to take, and now she’s gone.”
I squeezed him and shook my head at the metal corpse. “She was a good car and she died helping out a friend.”
“I’m gonna miss her.”
“I’m gonna miss her, too.”
Graham’s body began to ripple with laughter. “We sound like idiots.”
I nodded in agreement. “Yes, we do. Come on, my fellow idiot—let’s go and see how Stacy’s doing.”
Robert, Graham, and I walked up the stairs and patiently waited outside of the bedroom door as Lark gently placed Stacy onto the colorful coverlet, rearranging the pillows both around and beneath Stacy’s head so that she was comfortably lying in a semi-upright position.
“Thank you, Lark,” her weak voice managed to utter. “Thanks you guys,” she said, seeing the three of us huddled in the doorway.
Lark sat at the bottom corner of the bed and patted the edges around her, her gaze traveling to Graham and me. We took the hint and approached, Graham rounding the bed to sit opposite of Lark, while I sat on the edge closest to Stacy, my hand reaching out to hold hers in supplication.
“Do you need anything?” Lark asked, concern drawing lines along her forehead and around her mouth.
“I’d like some water,” Stacy croaked. Lark smiled and headed out of the room, her head cocked to the side with a peculiar smile on her face.
Graham scooted closer to Stacy as soon as Lark was out of the room and he reached for her hand, his face amused at the role reversal. “I never thought there’d come a day when I didn’t fear holding your hand, but for today at least, I’m there.”
A quiet laugh emerged from her lips as she shook her head. “You just wait until tomorrow.”
“Oh I don’t doubt it. You just make sure that I get a running start,” Graham chuckled.
Stacy’s gaze turned to mine and I saw a flicker of something—anger? Resentment?—but it faded instantly when she saw Robert standing behind me. “Lark told me about what Sean said. I’m sorry about that, Grace,” she said, her voice starting to sound hoarse. “He can be such a butthole sometimes—I want you to know that this isn’t your fault. I was getting in some extra work-outs over the past couple of days, trying to build up my stamina; I guess I overdid it.”
“Why?” I heard myself ask as I became aware of just how thin Stacy had become. Her arms looked like flesh covered sticks jutting out from her torso, and I felt instant shame when I compared her figure to mine, our bodies similarly gaunt, though mine had been by choice while hers was unpreventable.
“I told you. I’ve got to watch out for you. Erica won’t be expelled so close to graduation and I was too slow the last time—she caught me by surprise and you co
uld have broken your neck in that fall.” The list of reasons only further added to the guilt that was compiling within me, and I knew that just a few more and I’d leave indentations in the wood floors.
“Stacy, you need to worry about yourself. I’ve agreed to let Robert follow me around, and so far so good, right? Nothing really bad has happened here, so Lark was right for suggesting that I stay—just not right for suggesting we not tell you.”
“Wait, what do you mean nothing really bad has happened here? What happened that wasn’t so bad?”
Graham threw me a look of warning before telling in full detail what had happened in the bathroom. His face showed his disgust as he described what had been written on the back of Robert’s note, and I could see Stacy’s color rise quickly as she grew angry.
“This is bad, Grace,” she said in a breathy voice. “This is very bad.”
“Finally, someone talking sense,” Graham applauded. “I say it’s this Sam person, but they all insist that it’s not because it’s not his handwriting or something like that.”
I twisted my body, turning to face the door, and counted. When I reached three-hundred, I looked at Robert warily. He had already figured out what it was that had me so concerned and his face grew taut as he began to search, though his body remained directly beside me.
I watched him as his head ticked ever so slightly, a small frown followed by a crooked smile, only to be replaced with a deep scowl and then finally a grim line. This rapid altering of moods happened in the time span of a single second, yet I had been able to witness them all and appreciate each one as he listened to the thoughts that filled his sister’s mind.
“Robert?” I called to him. It felt so strange, so…foreign to do so after having not willingly spoken his name without provocation for the past several weeks, but it also felt unbelievably welcoming, comforting.
“It’s happening,” he said out loud. His gaze locked onto mine and I absently reached out with my hand, his own quickly latching onto mine. It was a wave that hit me, a wave of information and images that bombarded me with their immensity. I wavered as I sat, and Robert quickly braced my body against his as I began to see what he was seeing.
