‘I’ll text you when I set off and meet you outside the place where I found you this evening.’
She didn’t look back to acknowledge him again. One more look at him standing there alone would not have helped her confusion and disquiet.
Chapter 47
Dimitris, Tess, and Nic were at the bar when Penny walked back into the Athena.
They all looked at her. Tess put down a bottle she was pouring from and moved towards Penny. ‘Can I get you a brandy?’ She patted her arm and guided her to a barstool.
Dimitris said nothing, but waited for her to speak. ‘Thank you. That would be great. Just what I need,’ she replied.
She smiled at him, almost to reassure herself that he was real, was there, wasn’t a figment of her imagination.
Laughing as a release she said, ‘Well, I wasn’t expecting that.’
Tess put the brandy in front of her. ‘Where is he now?’
‘He’s staying in Corfu Town. He’s driving back there now.’
Dimitris stood with Nic. She wondered what on earth he was thinking about what had happened; what he was thinking of her.
There was anger too. How dare Bruce step into her new world, even for a moment? He hadn’t considered how his unburdening himself might affect her, how she might feel about that.
Penny climbed off the bar stool and Tess went to fetch the mezze she’d promised Penny.
‘‘Goodnight,’ she said to Dimitris and Nic.
‘Take care,’ said Dimitris, his face giving nothing away.
‘I will. And thank you for today. It was lovely.’ She held his gaze. ‘I’m sorry about my unexpected visitor. I had no idea he was coming. Can we talk, perhaps tomorrow?’
‘I’ll be in Corfu Town for most of the day, but I might be free later.’
Penny tried to read his face, but it was closed and she recognized the man she had met on the first day of her holiday. He had returned, with the cold stiffness that had made her think of him as a sculpture.
An hour earlier it would have felt like the most natural thing in the world to kiss him goodnight, but now it felt as though a spell had been broken.
Once across the road and walking down the quiet lane, Penny began to cry. It was a release, a mark of her confusion, and the return of a deep sadness.
Dimitris watched her quietly until she disappeared into the velvet darkness of the still warm night. The day had not ended how he had expected either.
Back in the apartment, sitting on the side of the bed, Penny noticed her phone was still charging. She picked it up and saw three missed calls, all from Bruce, and a text from Lizzie.
Hi Pen. I just wanted to let you know that Bruce has rung me. He seemed to know you were abroad, but wanted to know where. I didn’t tell him. I hope that was the right thing. He seemed keen to chat to you and was full of how marvellous Italy is. I couldn’t make it out. If I’m honest, our conversation was a bit odd. Hope you’re ok and still soaking up that glorious sunshine and drinking the wine. Text me back if you can to let me know how you are. L x
There was also a voicemail, from Bruce, but she put down her phone without listening to it.
It wasn’t midnight yet and she heard movement outside as people returned from dinner.
Soon, though, there was silence and it was in this quiet she fell asleep, still dressed, on the bed, falling into a series of fitful dreams and a strange, surreal replay of the day’s events.
Chapter 48
The air was richly perfumed with the scent of geraniums and the sea. The lemon trees that lined the little road that led to the Athena looked like illustrations from a children’s storybook, vivid yellow with bright green leaves, framed by a clear blue sky. The early-morning scene breathed serenity, as well as a freshly washed feel.
Tom, the ginger cat that Theo liked to play with at the Athena, lay in the shade, preparing, with lazy acceptance, for a day of being petted and stroked. Tess stood with her first coffee of the morning, her eyes on the horizon where a yacht moved slowly south.
Tess had been thinking of Penny and Dimitris that morning. Grateful for the love she’d had, she recognized two people falling in love. Now, after the appearance of Penny’s visitor last night, it seemed all bets were off.
Sometimes people just keep each other warm for a while, Tess thought. It crossed her mind, not for the first time, that that phrase could have described her friendship with Nic.
She worried about him sometimes. He had never found anyone to share his life with, to share all the wonderful things she knew he embodied, and could offer.
What she didn’t admit to herself was that when she followed through the idea of Nic finding someone and settling down, she was not sure that was what she wanted. Nic with a partner of his own, perhaps even a family, was a Nic that wouldn’t be there so much for her and Theo. He would be missed, as he was missed during the winter, when he was in Athens.
She’d surprised herself with how unsettled his day away in Athens, unusual in their summer time together, had made her feel the week before.
She put down her coffee cup and straightened the table and chairs next to her. There was a lot to do before the first breakfasts were served.
It was just after 11.30 when Penny strolled down to the end of the little lane and saw Bruce waiting there. The new day had washed away the shadows from St George. She’d worried that the incident with Bruce might have tainted the place, covered it with a pall of misery, and squeezed out the joy.
Wherever you went, you always carried your baggage with you, Penny decided, remembering that Nic had said that Corfu either soothed you, or celebrated with you.
As she got into the car, a smiling Bruce reached across and kissed her on the cheek.
‘Good morning. Thank you for agreeing to come. I’ve found just the place. I think you’ll love it.’
He set off before she had a chance to fasten her seat belt properly, and they left St George at pace. She looked over at him and saw no trace of the distraught man she’d been with the night before. Here was a taste of the usual, self-confident Bruce of old and here was she, starting to feel all the old feelings – the confusing ones that made her feel unsure, made her feel that she was giving up something of herself.
There was still unfinished business between them, she thought. The door hasn’t closed on this. He felt so real, sitting there next to her. Maybe she was wrong she still loved him. Was there anything he could say that would make her want to be with him again? What did she want?
She wondered how she might have felt, if he’d turned up in a few days’ time when she’d had a chance to be with Dimitris that bit longer – long enough to know and feel where that was going. Instead, here was the old and familiar – if far from perfect – calling her away from the new. The new – Dimitris – was exciting, promising, but as yet unspoken and untried. Their connection might even, after last night, have no future at all. What must he be thinking?
Was what she thought she might have with Dimitris a mirage, based on a kiss – albeit a tender kiss – and a need to feel love and be loved? Or was it just a holiday romance?
Twenty minutes later, off the main road to Corfu Town, Bruce pulled up. It was the restaurant with the wooden pier that Lily had spotted on their trip to the Strawberry Villa.
Once seated, Penny waited for Bruce to speak. Surely, he had another speech prepared, she thought cynically. But he didn’t say anything. He just looked at her as though she was the most precious and fascinating thing he’d ever seen, which made her feel pinned down like a butterfly, caught and displayed in a glass box.
‘So, what have you been doing for the last two weeks? Sunbathing? You look fantastic. The sun suits you, Pen.’ She didn’t answer, so he smiled broadly and looked around him, taking in the rocky headland, softened by gently swaying pine and cypress trees and an old Venetian manor house hidden through the trees. A few seabirds were circling and a motorboat purred past, swirling across the bay. Under the pier, the sea spark
led.
‘This bit is a little more sophisticated. More us, don’t you think? I’m not sure I’m into getting away from it all so much. There’s nothing to do. You really have to like scenery here, don’t you? You said you’d been on a boat, yesterday? Where did you go?’
Penny put down her glass.
‘Kalami. It’s up on the north-east coast, where Lawrence Durrell lived and wrote. I came here to see where he and the rest of the family lived in the 1930s. You remember how much I love their books? I was reading one of them to Dad when he was dying. There’s just one more villa to see – the Snow White. It’s not far from here actually.’
‘So, who was the guy – Dimitris, was it? – that you were having a drink with?’
‘Dimitris? He took me, and another couple up to Kalami. He has a yacht and you can charter it for trips.’
‘Ah, so a sort of tour guide. I bet he was charming. It’s part of the job, isn’t it? I bet he’s popular with women of a certain age.’
Penny looked down at the table, trying to keep her trembling hands still, and then looking directly at Bruce, she said, ‘Bruce, why are you here?’
He put down his drink so that he could lean back and use his hands and arms to emphasize his words.
‘Okay, here goes. So, it turns out that I’ve caught the attention of the university board and in the autumn, I’m applying to be Master – head – of one of the colleges, which is where you come in.’
She raised her eyebrows quizzically.
‘When I apply for the post in the autumn, which would be a really big deal for me, I’ve been told that applications are looked on more favourably if you’re married, or planning to be. Quirky, I know, but there it is. Southern Italy, it turns out, isn’t so different from Oxford in the 1950s.’ He looked rueful, then amused.
‘So, it all seemed to make sense, Pen. I’ve been missing you, and we’re both still single. We were planning to get married . . . These last six months have been a test, but we’ve found each other again. So, what do you think?’
As he finished, Penny wasn’t quite sure how to arrange her face. She’d never felt so detached from someone who was sitting so close to her.
All that they’d ever been to each other seemed like an echo from another time, another world. What she’d just heard was less of a declaration of love and more of a business arrangement. She felt a frisson of anger that he clearly had so little respect for her, that he thought she’d jump at the opportunity to marry him.
You don’t know me at all, Bruce, you never have, she thought. But I know you and that’s all that matters now. Still, she said nothing.
Bruce began to talk again.
‘I appreciate you weren’t expecting to see me yesterday, but I hope it’s a good surprise. Italy is amazing, Penny. You’d love it. You should see where I live, the rooms. It’s like living at the Villa d’Este. And as for the wine . . . I have my own cellar.’
Penny held her hand up to make him stop, before he moved on to a description of the furniture and his car.
‘Bruce, please, don’t say any more. There are two very important things you need to know. Firstly, breaking off our engagement was the right thing to do. That decision is still the right one. Secondly, the life you have found in Italy sounds perfect for you – as perfect for you as Corfu is for me.’ She held up her hand again as he was about to interrupt her.
‘I don’t want to be unkind. You do at least understand that about me, that I don’t like hurting anyone, but I won’t marry you to make the world right for you, to make things happen that work for you. I have as much right as anyone to live my life and enjoy it. I owe you nothing, Bruce, just as you owe me nothing. I think that’s all I need to say.’
She watched as the truth began to filter through to him, as the realization dawned that he wasn’t going to get his way.
‘You shouldn’t have come, Bruce, and I shouldn’t be here. I have somewhere else I need to be.’
‘Penny, wait.’ He reached into his shirt pocket and fetched out his wallet, pulling a photograph from it.
‘Do you remember this? What a night that was, Penny. I never felt more sure about anything, or anyone in my life.’
He handed her the photo of their engagement party photo. She saw herself, all shiny hair and eyes, smiling broadly and presenting her hand with the flashy ring towards the camera. Bruce had his arm around her waist, but wasn’t looking at the camera, or at her. For one terrifying moment, she couldn’t recognize herself as the woman in the picture, who seemed lost in another time, someone from another planet. She wasn’t sure yet whether the new Penny was real either, but she also knew she couldn’t go back.
She got off her chair and stood next to a now silent Bruce.
‘You’ve changed,’ was all he could find to say.
‘I don’t think so. I think I’ve just had the space and the courage to be who I really am. This is who I’ve always been.’
He shrugged, as if to say, ‘So what?’
She was strong enough to smile to herself. His blatant disregard for her feelings when they didn’t fit in with his plans had always been there. Was there still. Always would be.
He might turn heads when he walked into a room or a restaurant – he was a handsome man – but the fact that he had thought that just strolling back into her life was enough to pull her back to him, that she could be gulled and flattered into hitching her wagon to his star, made her pity him.
The spell had been broken, truly broken now.
‘Goodbye, Bruce. I’m going home.’ She walked away.
He stood up and, throwing some money on the table, followed her. ‘Penny, at least let me take you back. Don’t walk away like this. Stop. We can be civilized.’
She carried on walking.
Chapter 49
As Penny stepped into the Athena, the smell of coffee and the chattering customers enjoying lunch lifted her. The local green bus had been an adventure – she hadn’t been sure she was on the right one until about five minutes before she got off – but it had brought her back in one piece.
Lily popped up from behind the bar, where she’d been fetching bottles of orange juice out of the fridge.
‘Hi. Usual table?’ she said. ‘Tess asked me to put a reserved sign on it.’ She raised her eyebrows as though this was a special and unusual thing.
‘Yes, please,’ said Penny.
A few minutes later she was staring out at the sea and the rocks below, sipping coffee.
She felt about coffee the way some people felt about tea – there wasn’t much a cup couldn’t put right. Even the thought that Bruce was still somewhere on the island wasn’t enough to dampen her mood. He had left her life, finally, irrevocably,
She put the fact that he had been in it at all down to life and experience. He was just part of the journey that had brought her here, that had shaped her. Even if that shaping had been more about knowing herself and what she didn’t want, it was still in progress. She was growing.
Tess wandered over.
‘I bet that felt good.’ She brought another cup of coffee for Penny. ‘Here you go. One is good; two even better’
‘Thanks, Tess. just what I needed. Thanks too for the brandy last night. It was quite an evening.’
‘How are you?’ Tess took a chair and sat down.
‘I’m relieved. In a way Bruce was unfinished business. He hadn’t been in my life for months, but I still wondered when I felt low, or lonely, if I’d done the right thing. It was the best thing that could have happened in a way, as it gave me the chance to say some things I needed to say and to know that, whatever comes, I know myself well enough now not to let another Bruce into my life.’
Penny looked at her before Tess added, ‘My dad said real love was about being with someone who is there with you through all the difficult times, sharing the load. He had that with my mum. They didn’t have long together, but every minute was worth the pain that losing her brought him. I suppose that’s what I�
�m looking for and I know it’s worth waiting for. More importantly, I know what it isn’t and I now have the courage to say “no” to that.’
Tess squeezed Penny’s hand and stood up, as she heard Lily calling her from the bar.
‘Your dad was right,’ she said, then added, ‘Dimitris was in this morning. He asked me to pass a message on. He’s gone into town but will be back after lunch.’
‘I’m going into Corfu Town after this coffee,’ Penny said. ‘If you see him, will you let him know I’ll be back later, please?’
Tess nodded and after touching Penny on the shoulder, walked back into the kitchen taking off her apron as she went.
The Liston exuded its usual timeless, cosmopolitan air. Penny sat at one of the tables under the cool stone canopy, with two parcels at her feet.
She’d been to the art shop to collect the two paintings she was leaving as farewell gifts. The mounting and framing had been done beautifully, with real craftsmanship and quality in the work. One was of Theo – that was for Tess. The other, for Dimitris and Aris, was the painting of the Dora that Tess had admired. She hadn’t decided yet when to hand them over.
There remained six full days left on the island and she already had a feeling they would be even more precious than the ones she’d had so far. Being on her own in town felt different today. When she’d first arrived, she’d imagined spending most of her time on Corfu on her own.
Yes, she’d had lots of time to do her own thing, relax, make her own plans, or choose to have no plans at all, but she’d never been lonely. Every person she’d met had become part of the jigsaw of her life. Whether a small or large piece, they mattered, had become part of her story.
She felt she understood now, more than ever, what the Durrells had experienced here, the impact the island had had on them all.
It wasn’t just beautiful, idyllic – all the things that you’d expect from a Greek island with a climate the gods themselves must have designed. Beyond the holiday brochure descriptions were the things that a person could only experience there. Corfu was ready to change a person’s life and help them discover who they really were.
Looking for the Durrells Page 22
