A Beautiful Disaster

by Marguerite Labbe

  “A complete and utter sap when it comes to true love. Add in long, unrequited, true love that’s finally made a connection and you are a goner.”

  Felipe swatted Trask with a disgusted expression. “Don’t go spreading my weaknesses about. Nobody needs to know that.”

  Trask grabbed Felipe’s hands. “Hey, I’m proud of you.”

  “You are so good for me.” Felipe smiled and leaned in to give Trask a quick kiss. “Ooooh, I’ve gotta find Morris and tell him he was so right. Then I have to find Duchess. Oh, she’s going to loooooove this.”

  Trask shook his head as Felipe raced off. He’d forgotten all about helping Trask unload the last of the stock. He expected Felipe to get halfway across the con floor before he remembered. If he knew his imp at all, he’d be right back to help, full of remorse and apologies.

  Whistling to himself, Trask hauled the rest of the boxes out. He was a blessed man indeed. And tonight when they were in their own home, Trask intended on cashing in on his interrupted kiss and then some.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  BRENDEN SCRUBBED the butcher’s block with more force than was necessary. The whole situation with Dakota had reached the point of ridiculousness. Brenden had doubted Dakota’s resolve; now he wasn’t so sure. It figured. It just fucking figured… he finally had Dakota, and the man was driving him as insane as he had before they’d hooked up. How was that even possible?

  He was free to ogle as much as he wanted. Dakota encouraged it. He could touch. He could kiss. He could even share all the pieces of his heart that he’d hidden away. But Dakota only let it get so heated between them before he took a step back. If Brenden didn’t have the memory of Kent Island to sustain him, he’d worry that Dakota was turned off by him.

  That definitely was not the case. Dakota almost always instigated. Besides, Brenden couldn’t misinterpret those heated glances and even more heated kisses. He couldn’t deny the state they were both in when they went to bed and woke up. Each time it got harder to let him pull back, and they both were getting testy over all the sexual frustration.

  Where the fuck was Dakota finding his reservoir of willpower? Because Brenden had zilch. And now that his prep station was clean, he had nowhere to vent his frustrations.

  Brenden was in a position he never thought he’d ever be in. He was going to have to seduce Dakota before they killed each other. They had entered another dimension of weird. Dakota was trying to romance him, and Brenden was hell-bent on making Dakota so crazy that he caved and screwed him. He would laugh at them both if he wasn’t so damned horny.

  Brenden stirred the gently bubbling sauce and set the burner on low for it to simmer. He’d needed a break from the endless calls and to-do lists. They hadn’t had much of a chance to have a home-cooked meal, and the lasagna would freeze well, so they could pull it out in a crunch. Besides, Dakota usually mellowed when Brenden cooked for him. He’d get him in a mood, talk him into stretching out on the couch, and then Brenden would pounce.

  Dakota deserved it. He’d pounced Brenden often enough. And his plans to romance Brenden were messing with his head. He was getting better at it, the spontaneous dances in the kitchen, taking Brenden’s hand when they were out together, and the sweet words he’d whisper with a wicked light in his eyes. Once he’d warmed up to the idea, he seemed to delight in the romance. Born charmer. He was giving Brenden everything he’d ever dreamed of and more, except for the one glaring omission.

  Brenden had hoped his time out of town would help. But the trip to Wilmington to run the details of the multi-family reunion hadn’t lessened his desire for Dakota one iota. It shouldn’t have surprised him. That tactic had never worked in all the years Brenden had tried avoiding him. And Dakota had welcomed him home with a hot meal and candles on the table and a kiss that let Brenden know how much he’d been missed. Even that hadn’t been enough to get Dakota naked, though they’d come close. Seducing him was the only answer.

  Besides, Brenden needed a distraction. Eight more weeks until the big event. When Brenden first made the commitment to go for the Annapolis Chessie Con, it was over a year away. Somehow that year had whittled down to eight short weeks. Every time he considered the date, a spurt of panic hit him. Eight more weeks and it was make-or-break time.

  He had to remember he wasn’t going at this alone. He had Dakota with him. He had zero doubts about Dakota sticking by his side when it came to the conventions. They were in it for life. So if he had no qualms about Dakota’s loyalty there, it made Brenden fret over why he had worries about Dakota committing to him. When it came down to it, was he concerned about Dakota, or was it that deep down Brenden had serious abandonment issues?

  Brenden opened up the refrigerator and grimaced. It needed a thorough cleaning out and washing down. Dakota thought he was mental for using cleaning as a stress reliever, but Brenden found it soothing to put something in order. That’s why Dakota’s habit of leaving his belongings about didn’t bother him as much as he pretended. Picking it up gave him balance. And most of the time Dakota didn’t take it as an insult when he did. He got a kick out of putting something off whack just to watch Brenden putter about fixing it.

  As he pulled out condiments and checked expiration dates, Brenden remembered the time he’d come home to find Dakota’s jacket draped over the banister, the couch pillows strewn on the floor in front of the video game console, and all the kitchen cabinets open. There had been a clear trail of his progress throughout the house.

  Dakota had hidden and watched Brenden move from one mess to another, humming to himself as he cleaned until Dakota couldn’t contain his snickers anymore and Brenden found him. Brenden smiled. It was one of the many ridiculous memories that made up their lives and reminded Brenden of how much he’d always loved Dakota. That streak of mischief and fun had lightened him up and reminded him there was more to life than appointment books and to-do lists.

  By the time he had the refrigerator up to his specifications, it was time to cook and season the meat. He checked his phone first and decided they would get all the volunteers together in two weeks. He consulted his and Dakota’s schedule, then sent out a group invite. It had to be done because not everyone was getting with the program and Brenden was not about to put up with any last-minute shenanigans.

  Minime scampered into the kitchen and eyed Brenden with a plaintive mewl.

  “Let me guess. Dakota took your bosom buddy into his studio and left you and me alone with each other?”

  It wouldn’t hurt either one of them if Brenden took some time out of his schedule for attention and play. He reached into the drawer that Dakota loaded with cat toys and sat on the floor, waving a feather on the end of a stick. Dakota taught him that it was okay to unwind and not feel guilty about it. Sometimes Brenden wondered if he taught Dakota anything fun.

  Minime’s ears pricked up with interest and he scampered toward the feather, rearing up before pouncing. “Such a fierce little kitten warrior.”

  As Brenden played with the kitten, he thought about how Dakota had always insisted on not having a pet. Now look at him. There was a whole drawer full of toys of all kinds. While Brenden researched the best food for kittens and spent days going over the reviews of every vet in town, Dakota got on the floor with them and mock wrestled around. Both were important for the little guys.

  Brenden tapped Minime on the head with the feather and smiled as he tried to catch it between his paws.

  Right now Dakota had Toothless in his sacred studio where the little thing would get into everything, yet Brenden couldn’t picture Dakota booting the kitten out for anything. Because when Dakota loved something, he held on to it. How could Brenden not understand how that applied to him too?

  How many different times had other people tried to get between the two of them? There had been other friends in high school, people in Brenden’s clique who believed he was wasting time with an imbecile, and on Dakota’s side who couldn’t see why Dakota stuck around with an emotionless jacka
ss. It pissed him off that people couldn’t recognize how freaking smart Dakota was. They just saw the surface charm.

  Then there were the other promoters over the years. The ones who’d come to them in secret with the crazy idea that they’d be more successful apart. Dakota didn’t need an anal-retentive martinet. He could do better with them. Or Brenden was weighing himself down with Dakota’s ways. Not one of the ploys had ever worked, and Brenden and Dakota had gotten laughs out of them all.

  Yeah, Dakota didn’t have a history of sticking around with his boyfriends, but Brenden knew he’d never loved any of them. He’d definitely lusted after a few. Brenden had heard way too many details about those. He’d cared about some, but not loved, because he hadn’t ached when any of them left. If they split up, Dakota would hurt, which meant he loved him.

  Hell, Dakota really must love him, because he’d never put himself through a situation like this with any other man on the planet.

  He had to face the truth. His concerns about Dakota sticking around had nothing to do with him and everything to do with the man who’d walled himself away and buried himself in his work. Who had abandoned Brenden and his mom, provocation aside, and who in his pride had refused to take his grieving son back into his home because he’d have to swallow his own hurtful words.

  Was Brenden going to lay that burden on the man he loved? If anyone was in danger of being like his dad, it was him. He had the tendency to hide behind his work, especially when he was upset. How many times had Dakota tried to have dinner with him or hang with him and Brenden had hidden behind his to-do list? It made him ill to think he was anything like the man who had spawned him, but Brenden couldn’t hide from that anymore. He refused. Time to make a conscious choice in another direction.

  Brenden closed his eyes and let his head thump back against the counter. He was an idiot. Dakota was an idiot, though a smart idiot. They loved each other. They’d always loved each other and stuck by each other. Why should this be any different? It was so like Brenden to want to complicate things and like Dakota to be wary.

  Sharp pinpricks went through his pants and traveled up to his chest. Brenden opened his eyes and stared back at Minime’s round face. “You always seem to recognize when I’m in a mood.”

  Just like Dakota, who not only recognized it first but often implemented some plan to get him out of it. Brenden kissed the top of Minime’s head. “Climbing on people is a bad habit. So is rolling around on the kitchen floor, but I won’t tell if you won’t.”

  Minime butted his head against Brenden’s chin and made a clumsy leap for the forgotten feather. Brenden resisted the urge to pick it up and let him play with it instead as he stood to wash his hands. He’d finish prepping dinner, clear off as much work as he could, and then make plans for tonight. Because Dakota was going to fall hard. He wouldn’t see Brenden’s ploy coming.

  He could pounce him in his studio, but that was Dakota’s workspace, and since he was trying to be good and resist, the studio would be a bad idea. Dakota would get irritated, and then they’d end up arguing. Then Brenden would get pissy. So seducing him in his studio was out.

  Brenden hummed to himself as he browned and seasoned the meat. He had to think like Dakota. Dakota was sneaky. He didn’t announce his plans. He didn’t try to argue and confront Brenden when maneuvering around him got the results he wanted.

  Brenden needed a two-pronged attack. First, he had to tell Dakota that he knew Dakota would stay. That should be the end of it, but Brenden was pretty sure that deep down, Dakota was scared. He didn’t have any faith in himself, which made Brenden ache for him. The only thing that would prove it to Dakota was time. Still, telling him would lay the groundwork.

  Then, he couldn’t try seducing Dakota right away. Dakota would have his guard up. He’d expect Brenden to use Dakota’s own tactics. Come at him like Dakota came at Brenden in Kent Island.

  Brenden poured himself a glass of wine. He’d never be able to think of that place without a thrill of heat and sweetness again. He layered the lasagna, still considering the night. He didn’t think Dakota would know how to process Brenden’s tactic. Patience wasn’t Dakota’s strength. He wouldn’t be able to understand Brenden holding back, so by the time Brenden did pounce, he’d crumble as easily as Brenden had.

  He should feel guilty about plotting like this, but Brenden didn’t feel it in the slightest. Dakota had it coming, dammit.

  As he slid the lasagna into the oven, his phone rang. Brenden glanced at the screen and winced. Aden. He couldn’t talk to Aden while planning on seducing Dakota.

  And he couldn’t keep avoiding mixing his old life and new. If he wanted Dakota to believe him, he had to face that letting their family in on the news was a part of the whole. He refused to tell Trev and Evelyn about their relationship until after the show, but Aden was another matter. He already knew, and he was one of a handful of people who Brenden opened himself up to.

  “Hey, Aden, how’s it going?” Brenden set the phone on speaker and grabbed a washcloth to wipe down the stovetop.

  “I was calling in to check on you. Haven’t heard from you in a bit.” Aden’s voice was neutral, but Brenden suspected why he was calling. “You and Dakota have been sequestered the first half of summer.”

  Brenden resisted the urge to take the phone off speaker mode. It wasn’t like anyone but the kitten could overhear, and he had to talk about it out loud sometime. “You mean you’re calling to check on the status of Dakota and I, don’t you? We’re making each other mental as usual, but we haven’t killed each other or broken any hearts.”

  “So, he’s talked to you.” Aden sounded relieved. “I hoped he would. He’d said you weren’t ready for the family to know.”

  “I’m working my way there.” Brenden set the pots and pans he used for prep into the sink and ran the hot water. “It’s a huge step, and once we go there, there’s no going back. So we wanted to be certain before we upset the Nye family balance. Now that I’m certain, I have to work up the guts.”

  “True, but Dakota told you that I’m on your side, right?”

  Brenden smiled and rolled up his sleeves to wash the dishes. “From the way he put it, you are on my side, not necessarily our side,” he teased. “He told me that you’d put a contract out on him if you ever found me in a state like you did last time.”

  It embarrassed him that Dakota figured it out, though not nearly as much as it embarrassed him that Aden witnessed it firsthand. But at least it had been those two. He’d been with them both when they had been at their worst, and he trusted them to see him in a similar state of collapse.

  “As well I should,” Aden said sternly. “No one’s allowed to make you cry, Bren, not even Dakota.”

  “It wasn’t entirely his fault.” The water was hot enough to sting his hands, but Brenden never felt like the dishes got clean enough if it was cooler. “I built up a situation in my head and cut him out before he had a chance to pull back.” Dakota hadn’t even put up a fight, and even though he’d known that was the likely outcome, it had hurt. Still, Brenden never gave him a chance. They were in a different place now.

  “I… all jokes aside. This was a shock, no lie, for all of two minutes, and then it just seemed right to me.” Aden hesitated. “It’s always been Brenden and Dakota for as long as I can remember. So when you decide to let Mom and Dad know, send me a text and I’ll be there to back you both up.”

  “Thanks, man, we appreciate it.” Brenden had no doubt Aden would be there. “What about Zach?”

  There was a long pause on the other line. “Zach will react the same way to you two as we all do when Mom and Dad make inappropriate comments. He doesn’t want to consider anybody else’s love life other than his own. So if we’re honest, I suspect he’ll be weirded out at first. Then Dakota will make as many sex jokes as he can until Zach becomes immune.”

  Damn, that was a very accurate assessment. Another good reason to wait until after the Annapolis Chessie Con.

 
; They chatted for a few more minutes while Brenden finished up the dishes. After he hung up, he studied the pristine kitchen. He’d bring his work in here and catch up with his emails and work on the timetable. Then when Dakota emerged from his workshop, Brenden could dedicate all his attention to him.

  But first he needed a few things. Brenden went into the bedroom they shared. The space was too small; they needed to work something else out. But that would have to wait until after the con. It seemed like between Dakota’s waiting game and the approaching con, Brenden’s whole life had been put on hold.

  The convention would be a worry for tomorrow. Tonight, he had bigger concerns.

  Brenden tapped his finger against his lips as he analyzed the room, trying to play out his scenario mentally until he was satisfied with his plan. Now on to the bigger question. If he was Dakota, where would he hide his toys?

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  DAKOTA RETREATED into his studio. Fleeing from the image of Brenden playing with Minime. That’s what he got for peeking in on the man in the hopes of surprising him. Instead, Brenden surprised him again.

  He flopped back into his rolling chair and didn’t resist as it slid back several feet. Every time he looked at Brenden, he craved him. He wanted to kiss him and then undress him slowly in whatever room they happened to be in. And if it wasn’t a bedroom, that was a bonus, because Brenden’s mouth would go all prissy before he tried to lecture Dakota about appropriate time and places.

  He groaned and turned toward his computer. He couldn’t think of Brenden getting pissy. Nothing got to him like that. He’d edit another podcast episode. Then maybe he’d have some self-control where the sight of Brenden rolling around on the kitchen floor wouldn’t send him into a tailspin of want.

  It had been so sweet, though, the expression of delight on Brenden’s face as he toyed with the kitten. He’d known that if he walked in, Brenden would’ve been mortified at being caught on the floor, playing. So Dakota hadn’t disturbed him. Instead, he’d watched with that tender aching feeling he got only with Brenden until he realized he’d better go hide in his studio before he joined Brenden right on that kitchen floor and convinced him to get naked.