If he laughed at her, she would leave him. Her heart could not carry the burden of still another break.
Chapter 32
Graham did not come to her the next morning. Frightened by the possibility that he might truly be ill, and furious that he would not trust her to help him, Penelope overcame her pride and pounded on his chamber door.
John appeared more haggard than the night before, but he was still large enough and strong enough to prevent her pushing past him. Penelope crossed her arms and looked him in the eye.
“Will you let me in there or do I have to call on Sir Percival and Lord Reardon to forcibly remove you?”
John wavered. She had always tried to be quiet and polite and not raise her voice in anger but this time was different, and she would not take no for an answer.
Apparently understanding, John surrendered. “He isn’t here, milady.” He stood aside to let her see for herself.
The bed lay untouched, as it had that last time. Penelope felt her heart ripping into little pieces, but she refused to fall apart in front of the servants.
Coldly she inquired, “How long has he been gone?”
“Soon after you left, milady.” John did not even try to hide the worry in his voice.
Penelope turned suspicious eyes to him at the tone of his voice. “Do you know where he went?”
“No, milady, that I don’t,” he answered, anxious to prove himself innocent.
Penelope didn’t know how to react to that. Should she assume Graham had simply gone off to his mistress and didn’t inform his servant? Perhaps he had received another message from London, but surely he would have said something to John? John could be lying, or Graham could be in a ditch somewhere hurt and unable to call for help. She tried not to panic.
“Did he not say anything when he left? When he would we back? Anything?”
“He just said he had some business to take care of and he’d not be long, that if you tried to reach him, to send word to London. I did that, so I been thinking he was with you.”
Penelope absorbed this information, squelching her fears by applying logic. Graham could take care of himself. He was much too big to disappear. If anything had happened to him, someone would have let her know. First, she would make a few discreet inquiries.
Trying to behave as if everything were normal, she sent word to Guy to meet her at the orphanage. She rode out after breakfast to inspect the building. Work seemed to be progressing smoothly. She would have to start giving thought to finding someone to take over operations.
She was inspecting the cots when Guy arrived. The pallets seemed thin, and she dragged one mattress from its frame and flung it over a second. As she struggled to make the unwieldy pallet lie straight, Guy stepped forward to help.
“Don’t you have a footman to help you with these whims, my lady?” Guy shifted the mattress so it lay directly on top of the other, then threw his long frame across the cot to test it for himself. He looked up at her impudently. “Care to join me?”
“Oh, Guy, won’t you ever grow up?” Penelope asked crossly, walking away from his carefree exuberance. She didn’t have the heart for laughter right now.
Guy leapt to his feet and ran after her, catching her by the waist and swinging her around. “What is it, Penny? What has Gray done this time?”
She could feel his comforting warmth. The sympathetic look in his eyes encouraged her to seek solace in his arms. Guy would never leave her wondering and hurt like Graham. Why couldn’t she have had the good sense to fall in love with Guy?
Penelope shook her head and pushed away from his hold. “Don’t, Guy. Have you seen him since I left?”
He frowned. “Graham? No, I thought he’d gone with you.”
“No, he had to go to London on some business. I just thought maybe you’d know when he would be back.” Penelope took a deep breath and tried to silence her fears. “How are you and Dolly faring these days? Since you’re still alive, I can see her brothers didn’t call you out for your outrageous behavior at the rout.”
Guy grinned and caught her up in the posture of a waltz, swinging her around in the space between the cots. “I told you Dolly is a senseless little chit, she does not complain of my brash behavior and has convinced her suspicious brothers that my intentions are honorable.”
“And are they?” Penelope lifted a quizzical eyebrow and put a stop to the impromptu dance.
Guy looked sheepish as he shoved his hands in his trouser pockets. “If she’d have me.”
Penelope laughed at his transparent eagerness. “You haven’t asked her yet? Coward. Do you intend to just dally at her heels until she grows bored waiting and looks elsewhere?”
“I would make an excellent cicisbeo, wouldn’t I? Probably better than a husband. I’m a dozen years older, Penny. I’d be doddering around like Larchmont with my wife leading me about by the nose.” He slumped down on the cot nearest the window and cast her a look of despair.
Penelope stuck to her guns. “Craven. As Alexandra so aptly puts it, coward, coward, coward. If you love her and haven’t got the gumption to ask for her, you deserve whatever happens. Don’t come to me for pity.”
“That’s easy for you to say!” Guy stood up and began to pace before the window. “All a woman has to say is no. What will I do if she says no? At least this way I can go on seeing her. If she tells me no, I couldn’t bear to be near her again. I would lose my mind; I know I would. You and Graham were quite right to decide on a marriage of convenience. If you’d told him no, you could have both gone on just the same as before. It’s only when these cursed emotions get in the way that things become complicated.”
“Yes, rather.” Without another word Penelope stalked out of the room.
Startled from his self-absorbed dilemma, Guy dashed after her. “I didn’t mean that the way it sounded, Penny. Forgive me. I know you love him, although the sapskull doesn’t deserve it. And beneath that rough exterior, I know he loves you, too. Just give him a chance. He’ll come around.”
Stiffly Penelope continued down the stairs, Guy clattering along beside her. He grabbed her hand and dragged her out to the porch, out of the hearing of the workmen in the back of the house.
“The last time I saw Gray before I went away to war, he was on his deathbed. His head and chest were completely wrapped in bandages. One leg was plastered from ankle to thigh, and his hand was bandaged so thickly it looked like a pillow. He was unconscious and hadn’t moved in days. Everyone was just waiting for him to die. His father even had solicitors frantically trying to determine the succession. When I came back five years later and learned he still lived, I couldn’t believe it. I expected to find some ghastly emaciated skeleton clinging to life from sheer meanness. Instead, you know how I found him. Despite his pretensions to the contrary, and do not mistake me—Gray is a skilled actor, a very talented one—he showed every sign of being a man in the best of health. A man like Graham does not choose a mousy schoolteacher for wife, no matter what story he has told you. He told you what you wanted to hear to win you because he wanted you. He would never have taken ‘no’ for an answer. Do you understand me, Penelope?”
The intensity of his gaze darkened his eyes to almost a blue-black against the tanned shadows of his face. Penelope studied him as if to verify the truth of his words by the symmetry of his features.
“What makes you call him an actor, Guy? I have never found him to be less than honest with me, when he chooses to say anything.”
Guy relaxed and leaned against the porch post. “In his younger years Trev walked the boards of many stages. Even Mrs. Siddons admitted he had talent. Many’s the play we have staged at the Hall when we ran out of other entertainments. Graham played most of the parts. I’ll not say that he’s been less than honest with you, Penny, but I’ll wager he’s not offered all the truth, either. He’s wooed you and won you with some flummery, and now he’s scared as I am of losing his lady when he declares himself. I wish I had half his skill in knowing w
hat a woman wants. But even if I should, I would not be able to act the part as well as he. I can’t hide my love, and I couldn’t hide my hurt if she tells me nay. Gray can.”
Penelope smiled faintly. “I think you credit the females of the race with more hard-heartedness than they possess. I cannot imagine any woman alive rejecting either of you. Or is it stupidity you accuse us of?”
Guy grinned, and his eyes brightened to blue again. “Not either, rather more the opposite. Women have such an understanding of what a man wants that they can wrap us around their little fingers. I have yet to meet the man who admits to any understanding of women. We are at your gentle mercies.”
“Fie on you for a fool, then.” Penelope dismissed this platitude. “We are left to watch and wait and hope. All we see is a man who has but to act to get what he wants. If Dolly says you nay, then it is because she is a senseless chit or you have behaved abominably. And I cannot feature you behaving in such a manner to a lady.”
Guy lifted his eyes with renewed hope. “If a villain like Graham can win a paragon such as yourself, my lady, then surely this poor fool can persuade a certain feckless lady to the same. Wish me luck, Penelope.”
“You don’t need it,” she scoffed, and minutes later she watched him ride away. She had no clearer notion as to where her husband might be than before, but a very odd emotion began to grow as she replayed Guy’s words. Could Graham truly feel more than he showed?
After ascertaining Graham still had not returned to the Hall, Penelope visited the Reardons next. Dolly gave no sign that Guy had approached her with his question, but she was so bubbling over with excitement at seeing Penelope that Penelope found it difficult to find a moment alone with Arthur or Henry to make her inquiries.
Arthur finally sent his sister to find his walking stick. When they were left alone, he nervously twisted his teacup in his hands. “I do not mean to be rude, Lady Trevelyan, but when even Dolly’s foolish stories can’t bring a smile to your lips, I fear some weighty matter preys upon your thoughts. Is there aught that I can do to relieve the burden? Sometimes it simply helps to talk about it.”
Penelope smiled at this ponderous speech. Arthur was only a few years older than herself, but these last years of living a life of danger had given him a more cautious approach than most young gentlemen. She liked him for his openness, however.
“I am simply wondering why I have not heard from Graham. I know it is foolish of me, and I know that he does not confide in you, but I sense there is something the two of you share. I thought, somehow, you or your brother might know what he is about.”
Arthur’s gray eyes looked troubled. “You are perceptive, my lady, but in this I will disappoint you. Graham hasn’t been here since the rout, and I have no notion where he could have got to. I wish I could help. Where has he gone? Did he say?”
“Do not worry yourself. He has just gone up to London on business. It’s a woman’s prerogative to worry when she receives no love notes while her husband is away. He will be angry with me for mentioning it, so please say nothing. He has done this before and returned safely. There is no reason for concern now.”
“But you are concerned, and you do not strike me as flighty as my sister. You would not go up into the boughs over nothing. Have you spoke with Hamilton?”
That provided a good opening for a change of subject, and Penelope leapt at it eagerly. “Yes, of course, but I think Guy’s state of mind is no better than Dolly’s.” She laughed and refilled his cup. Before long, she would be as good at acting as Graham. “I should think a man of his experience would be able to deal with infatuation a little more maturely, but I must admit to enjoying watching his arrogance knocked cock-a-hoop by someone with no experience at all.”
Arthur darted his sister a laughing look as she dashed back into the room, empty-handed. To Penelope he confided, “I see no hope for either of them. We will need to construct a circus tent when it comes time for the ceremonials.”
Dolly threw back her red-blond curls and glared at her brother. “I don’t know what you have done with your walking stick. I have searched everywhere you said and it is nowhere to be found. I cannot imagine how you could have lost it. And what ceremonials are you chuckling about?”
Arthur continued chewing on the sandwich he had just popped into his mouth and looked at his sister with a helpless shrug. Penelope smiled at this ploy and to appease Dolly, gestured toward the fireplace implements near Arthur’s chair.
“If I am not greatly mistaken, you will find his stick in there. That is one of Graham’s favorite habits. And we were speaking of Graham’s birthday. I thought it would be great fun to make a proper ceremony of it, but Arthur has rather rudely suggested it ought to be a circus. If you would oblige me, let me have his cane and I will beat it about his head a few times.”
Arthur continued chuckling as Dolly leapt for the weapon and mockingly set about applying it to his ears. Penelope departed soon after.
Riding home, she tried to convince herself this time it was no different than the last when Graham had disappeared for weeks. He had come home grouchy and irritable and limping worse than ever, but he had apparently been in no danger. She really should not worry about his abrupt departures, but her argument rang hollow even to herself.
This time it was different, she sensed it in every part of her being. Graham simply would not have disappeared without a word knowing how ill Augusta was and how she would worry, especially not after he had behaved so solicitously at the rout. They had almost reached an understanding that night. He would not risk it intentionally. Not answering her letter was the final straw. Graham would never have ignored her urgent plea. Never. Something was wrong. She just didn’t know how to go about finding what it was.
When she returned to the Hall, she sent her maid to find her trunk and pounded on the door of Graham’s chamber. When John appeared, she informed him boldly, “If Graham does not come home tonight, we are going to London on the morrow.”
Chapter 33
Chadwell raced the black stallion across the lengthening shadows of the hedgerow. Garbed in dark-tailed frock coat and pantaloons with only an occasional glimpse of white cravat, he blended in with the shadowy green of the overgrown briars and privet. His costume was not that of a country gentleman out for a leisurely ride, however, and if the sweat beading on his brow could be seen, even a casual observer would remark upon his exertion. He raced as if the devil were on his heels, or worse yet, ahead of him.
In Chadwell’s mind the latter was the case. He had cursed himself for three times a fool when he first left London. By now, he had exhausted curses as well as himself and his mount. It could not be much farther. He would have to arrive in time.
Why would he think Arthur had changed when none of the others had? Yet still he wanted to disbelieve the note he had intercepted. Arthur had nothing to gain by hiring cutthroats for murder. Where was the motive?
Chadwell’s weary brain could find none, but the writing had been Arthur’s. There was no mistaking it. The man must be mad. Somewhere over the years his mind must have snapped. Damn, but why hadn’t he finished for him when he had the chance? And now Penelope would pay for his failure.
He couldn’t let it happen. Arthur had to be stopped.
It was a trap. He sensed it, but he had no time to figure it out. Arthur couldn’t have planned on his intercepting the note; he knew nothing of Chadwell. He must be planning to lure Graham out by using Penelope as bait. That was the only logic he could follow.
His mind cried out in anguish at the urgent plea of Penelope’s letter. Arthur was the man who had stood over the twisted wreck of the phaeton knowing full well one of his friends lay among the remains, injured and probably dying, and had walked away. Walked away and ordered the others to do the same.
Chadwell could not believe even the perverted DeVere could be so evil. What would have happened had they known Graham lay among those ruins instead of Guy? Would it have been different if Graham had made
himself known? Could all of this have been prevented if Graham could have just summoned a loud moan from among the rocks where he had been thrown?
That agonizing question had worn itself thin long ago, but it beat a violent refrain as he neared his destination. Penelope’s life was more important than the dead and gone, but it still hinged on an action that had happened years ago. God, this was not fair. Don’t let Penelope pay for the sins of others.
Just let Penelope live. He would not ask for more. Her letter had mentioned nothing of where she was or how she was being treated, but the frantic tone of her words rang in his head just as if Penelope had spoken them. Her perfect, ladylike writing could have been written by any female, but not those words. Those were Penelope’s cries of fear and loneliness, he would recognize them anywhere. Only Penelope could manage to say so much in so little, write gentle, restrained language that pierced the heart without sentimentality. She should have taken up writing books. He would tell her that when he saw her again.
Because he would see her. He would find her. Arthur’s note had made it evident where they had taken her. He knew these fields and valleys like a second hand. He knew where Arthur would hide her. He just had to get there before any harm was done.
In the darkness he did not see the thin wire stretched between the two trees marking the beginning of the lane. He knew only that the path to Penelope lay ahead of him, and he increased his pace. Had he been a shorter man, the wire would have cut across his throat. As it was, it caught him across the chest and he flew backward over the stallion’s rump, his head hitting the rocky field with a resounding crash.
Love Forever After Page 29
