I could sense the others looking. By now, some of them had to have gotten the hint that I wanted to keep Ivy to myself. I knew this wasn’t the most professional behavior, but right now, I didn’t care what they thought of me.
“Something like that,” I replied to her. I wasn’t expecting her to say yes. She had a whole brood of men to choose from. It wasn’t like I was expecting our kisses or the sex to mean something special to her.
But a smile was spreading on Ivy’s face. “When?” she asked.
“Tonight? There’s a bar nearby we could go to. I’ll text you the address later. Say, about nine?” I still had no control over what I was saying. This wasn’t the plan. I was supposed to stay away from her – view the sex as a big mistake and try to get past it. A date at a bar was not the best idea for moving on.
“Cool. I’ll see you there,” she said, still smiling.
As she walked away, she looked at me over her shoulder. I watched her ass move in her dress and was reminded of how explosive she had been in my arms.
Not tonight. I wasn’t going to sleep with her tonight. I needed to get to know her. Four years was a long time. I felt like I knew nothing about her anymore. If we were going to have anything, if we were going to take this forward, we would have to start afresh.
When I left the cafeteria, the other guys were still talking to her. That familiar sting of jealousy was still there within me, but now that she’d agreed to have a drink with me, it was somewhat under control.
Chapter 18 - Ivy
I got dressed up for my date with Simon. Despite that sinking feeling in my stomach — that it all would all come crashing down — I was still excited. I couldn’t believe that he’d actually asked me on a date. Simon Hutch, the hottest guy in our hometown. The guy every cheerleader drooled over. The guy girls in Silicon Valley had their eye on. I was going on a date with him. The love of my life.
He’d texted me earlier with the address of the bar and I took a cab there. I was wearing a new red cocktail dress. I’d done up my hair in a poised yet messy bun and spent a long time on my makeup. I knew that the minute I saw him, I’d be reminded of how it felt to have sex with him.
Simon was waiting for me at a specially reserved table in the corner. It was a spunky modern bar, but the table he’d selected for us looked romantic. It was dimly lit and had an arrangement of floating candles and roses as a centerpiece.
He stood up as I approached him. I couldn’t help but smile shyly. He looked impeccable in a casual shirt and dark jeans. He always kept his clothes simple, which somehow accentuated how absolutely gorgeous he always looked. His dimples indented deeply on his cheeks as he smiled at me.
“Hello, Ivy,” he said and drew my chair out. I got a whiff of his cologne, which made my senses reel.
“Hi,” I mumbled.
Simon took a seat across from me. “I took the liberty of ordering us a bottle of wine, but feel free to order something else of your own if you prefer,” he suggested.
I shook my head. “Wine is fine,” I told him. When I looked around, I felt fancy. I was glad I’d taken the time and put in the effort to dress up.
The server arrived with the wine. Simon checked it and ordered it to be poured in both of our glasses. I knew nothing about wines, but it seemed like Simon did.
When the waiter was gone, I sighed and crossed my legs. “So . . . ” I began as he drank his wine.
“So, how are you liking it here?” he asked.
I smiled. “Actually, I love it here. There’s always something interesting happening in the city. I mean, I haven’t been here that long, but I can’t wait to start exploring. It’s so different from what I know . . . but I love it,” I told him.
Simon seemed pleased by that answer. “I’m glad. I didn’t want you to feel out of place,” he said.
My phone, which I’d placed facing down on the table, beeped. I couldn’t help but look at it, anticipating that it was Marco.
Where are you now, babe?
I ignored the text and put my phone down again. Simon had glanced at it, too, and his brows crossed.
“Do you need to make a call?” he asked.
I shook my head. “No. It’s nothing. Anyway, I wanted to tell you how impressed I am by what you’ve achieved here. I know Shay and your parents are very proud.”
He was watching me with those deep green eyes again, boring into my skull . . . making me feel naked again. I’d decided that I was going to try and have a normal date with him, but nothing about this felt normal. I couldn’t get past the feelings of desire that were rising up in me.
And then there was Marco. My phone beeped again, and I picked it up.
I’m getting mighty tired of being ignored, Ivy!
I could feel Simon’s eyes on me. Anger and frustration and fright all rose up in me as I typed him a quick message. It was my first response to Marco since he’d moved out of our apartment.
Leave me alone, Marco! I’ve moved on and so should you.
“What’s going on, Ivy?” Simon asked when I looked up at him again.
“Nothing – it’s nothing. So . . . about your achievements here,” I said.
He had his brows furrowed, but he squared his shoulders and nodded. “Yeah, thanks. I just had one good idea and I took it from there,” he replied.
“Is that why you came to California?” I asked.
He was staring at me, making me blush. “Pretty much, yeah,” he said.
I licked my lips, feeling nervous under his stare. I got the feeling that he wanted to say something more.
“I also wanted to get out there. Get out of town and just move on,” he continued.
“Move on from what?” I asked and he shrugged.
“From the small town where I was stuck. Away from my parents and some other things.”
“Other things?” I urged him.
I had no idea that Simon had been unhappy at home. He was always so charming and confident.
“Away from my feelings for someone,” he replied.
My heart seemed to stop in my chest for a moment. Who was he talking about? He couldn’t be talking about me! There was no way that Simon had feelings for me!
“You had feelings for someone?”
He was staring at me, holding my gaze but refusing to respond.
My phone beeped again. I wanted to curse under my breath but refrained from it.
I can’t leave you alone, Ivy. I love you and I know you love me too. When you see me again, you’ll know it’s the truth. I can’t wait to see you, babe. I can’t wait to have you again.
My heart seemed to drop into the pit of my stomach. Marco was hinting more and more every day that he knew where I was, that he was going to find me.
My hand shook as I stared at my phone. My vision seemed to blur. I had no idea what to do. I knew I couldn’t tell Simon – he would surely leave. He’d be disgusted by me and my choice in men.
Chapter 19 - Simon
The fact that Ivy kept checking her phone mildly bothered me at first, but now she was staring at the screen, refusing to look away. I couldn’t tell if she was excited by what she was reading or upset. She was trying her best to mask her emotion from me.
She looked up after a few moments went by. “Sorry . . . what were we talking about?” she asked.
I looked at her phone and she put it down on the table again.
“I don’t remember. If there’s something you need to attend to, I’ll give you some privacy,” I said.
Ivy waved a hand in the air like she didn’t want me to pay attention to what was going on. I couldn’t get rid of the feeling that it was some guy texting her which was why she was refusing to tell me who it was.
“Are you going to go back home at some point? Visit your parents?” she asked. I thought I heard an accusatory tone in her voice.
“They came to visit me some time ago and I see Shay quite often. I don’t know if there’s anything there for me,” I replied.
Ivy
nodded and took a sip of her wine. I watched the way the drink moved down her throat. I wanted her. I could have pushed everything off the table right there and taken her. But I’d decided to spend the time to get to know her instead.
“What about your friends? And are you going back for the wedding?” she asked.
“Of course. I wouldn’t miss Shay’s wedding for the world,” I said with a smile.
Her phone beeped again and she picked it up. I’d hoped that she wouldn’t. Whatever text she’d received, she read it and then looked over her shoulder.
“Ivy, there’s something going on,” I said.
She shook her head. “No. There isn’t. I’m just . . . trying to sort some things out,” she snapped.
I sat back in my chair. I couldn’t believe how disinterested she was on this date. I’d completely misjudged the situation. I thought I knew what was going on between us. After we had sex, I had hoped that maybe she felt the same way about me . . . but I was wrong.
I couldn’t understand why she’d even agreed to come on this date with me.
“What have you been up to in the past four years?” I asked.
Ivy shifted in her chair and drank some more of the wine. “Nothing as exciting as what you’ve been up to. I couldn’t leave town even though I wanted to. Student loans and a shitty job . . . that’s about it,” she replied.
“And what about . . . Was there a guy? Is there a guy?” I dared to ask. It was hard to imagine that a girl like Ivy could be single all this while. She looked nervously at me and then shook her head.
“No,” was all she said, and I knew she was lying. “What about you? Shay and I don’t really talk about you much,” she continued quickly. I shrugged.
“Nothing serious, no. I haven’t had the time . . . and maybe not the interest, either,” I replied. I didn’t want to actually say the words — that I never got over her, that every other woman paled in comparison.
She nodded her head. Then, her phone beeped again.
I sat back, watching her face as she read the text. She typed away furiously on her phone, and when she looked up at me, I’d had enough.
“What are we doing here, Ivy?” I blurted.
“Excuse me? What do you mean?” she asked, crossing her brows.
“Why are you here? Why did you agree to have this drink with me?” I was trying to keep myself calm. There was no use losing my cool over this.
“Because you asked and I wanted to. What kind of a question is that? Isn’t it quite obvious what we’re doing here?” Her eyes were glittering with passion. Whatever she was reading in her texts had made her tense.
“You’re speaking to some guy, aren’t you?” I asked, tipping my head towards the phone in her hand.
Ivy gulped and then licked her lips. She was refusing to actually respond.
“Tell me the truth, Ivy. Right then when I asked you if there have been other guys since I left, you lied to me, didn’t you?” I continued.
She was staring at me with a deer-in-the-headlights look in her eyes. She knew I’d caught her in her lies, but I had no idea why she was trying to hide it from me. Why would she do that? Was she seeing other people? Sleeping with other guys? Did she believe in some kind of open relationship policy?
I didn’t. Either I had her completely or I didn’t have her at all. There was no middle ground.
“Tell me, Ivy. I want to know. You’re speaking to some other guy right now, aren’t you? Right now, if I took your phone from your hand, I would see who you’re talking to,” I raged.
She switched off her phone and put it down on the table. “You wouldn’t do that. You wouldn’t invade my privacy like that,” she replied in a high, clipped voice.
I wanted to bang my fist on the table, shatter a few glasses. I could feel myself losing my mind. After all these years, when I finally thought I could have her . . . when I was so close . . . I was wrong. I couldn’t ever have Ivy. She would never be mine.
“You agreed to go on a date with me, Ivy. The least you can do is tell me the truth. Are you talking to some other guy right now or not?” I growled.
She sank into her chair, licking her lips nervously. “I am, Simon, but it’s not what you think.”
I felt the ground shaking under my feet. This couldn’t actually be happening!
Chapter 20 - Ivy
I wanted to tell Simon the truth. That was the first thought that ran through my head. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t find the courage to tell him who was sending me those texts. If I told him, he wouldn’t want me anymore. I’d be spoiled goods to him. I would be nothing more than a battered small-town girl incapable of making the right choices. The truth was that I was embarrassed by what he would think of me.
Simon took in a deep breath and shook his head. “Why are you here with me, Ivy?” he asked through gritted teeth.
I wished I could tell him why I was . . . That I’d always loved him. That this opportunity to go on a date with him felt like it was once in a lifetime. I was afraid it was slipping out of my hands. I should have kept my phone switched off. I shouldn’t have replied to Marco or instigated his fury.
I shook my head, my eyes beginning to water.
“Why aren’t you with him, Ivy?” Simon continued. I could see he was angry, and I didn’t blame him. I had behaved badly with him, and now I was refusing to tell him the truth. He’d caught me in my lie.
“It’s not what you think, Simon . . . ” I tried to say, and he clenched his jaws.
“Then tell me what it is, Ivy. I’m here; I’m listening. Explain to me why you’ve been texting some guy while out with me. Why you lied about being in other relationships these past four years. Why are you lying to me?” he growled.
Simon was trying to keep his voice low, but his fury was obvious. People at the tables near us turned to look at us. We were causing a scene, but I couldn’t stop the tears from bubbling up in my eyes.
“Simon, I can’t . . . ” I said, but he interrupted me again.
“You can’t because you don’t have an explanation for it. It is what it is. I shouldn’t have asked you out. I should have known this would never work.” With a snap, he stood up from his chair, leaving me sitting.
“What are you doing?” I pleaded with him.
He had his wallet out and he was counting money. “I’m leaving, Ivy. You’re clearly somewhere else, and I have no intention of drinking by myself.” He slammed the bills down on the table. “That should cover it,” he hissed.
“Please, just sit down. Let’s talk. Let me try and explain!”
I was beginning to believe that he deserved to know the truth. It didn’t matter what he thought of me anymore. I just needed him to know that I wasn’t trying to make him feel like a fool.
“There’s nothing left to explain, Ivy,” he said and then sighed, trying to calm himself again. I parted my mouth to speak, but he was talking again already. “Look, I knew this was a mistake. I shouldn’t have asked you out. What happened between us . . . was a mistake, too. I should have considered Shay’s feelings in all of this. I shouldn’t have allowed a moment of weakness to bring me down,” he said.
I shook my head. “What about me, Simon? What about what I want?” I cried, trying to hold the tears back.
“I don’t know what you want, Ivy. I’ve never known what you wanted. Four years ago, I made the decision to walk away from you because I was sure you’d never want me. I should have stuck to that decision. Anyway, you deserve someone better and I hope you find him.”
Simon was making to walk away when I stood up with a jerk.
“Please, Simon. Just let me explain . . . ” I pleaded, but he shook his head.
“You’re welcome to complete your internship at my company. I owe that to my sister because she’s never asked me for anything. But while you are here, I will try my best to keep my distance from you. You should do the same. I think that would be for the best.”
I watched with a quivering lip as Simon walked a
way, weaving his way around the tables in the bar. I was embarrassed and angry and miserable. But I couldn’t leave now. I didn’t have the guts to follow him. I was sure that he didn’t want me anymore. It was over.
I sat back down on the chair with a thump, switching my phone on again. A hoard of texts from Marco were waiting there for me.
If you don’t tell me now, I’m just going to have to find you.
I know you’re not at your apartment. So where are you, Ivy?
You’re going to make me do some things I don’t want to do.
Look at what you’ve made me become. A stalker! I hate myself.
I love you, Ivy. All I want is for us to be together. Don’t you see that?
Nobody else will love you like I do. Nobody else will want you. I will make sure of that.
Tell me where you are!
Those messages should have frightened me. He was basically telling me that he was keeping an eye on my apartment. He knew exactly where I lived in Palo Alto. He knew I wasn’t home. I should have been scared, but I wasn’t.
All I could feel was rage. Marco was the reason everything had come apart. He was why Simon walked away from me. He’d ruined my one shot at happiness, and now I wouldn’t be able to fix it. Marco, Marco, Marco. I hated him.
If you dare to come near me, asshole, I won’t hesitate to physically hurt you. You’ve ruined everything. I hate you. You deserve to hate yourself. Stay away from me.
I sent the text and my hands shook. I’d never spoken to anyone like that before, least of all Marco. I had no idea how he was going to react.
Chapter 21 - Simon
It was Investor’s Day at our office and everyone was busy with preparations.
It had been four days since I took Ivy out for a drink, and I’d barely seen her since then. I was keeping my distance from her and she was doing the same. Like I told her before, it was for the best. The less as we saw each other, the easier it was going to be. For me, at least. I didn’t think Ivy even noticed my absence from her life. Did she even care? She probably thought something along the lines of ‘good riddance.’
My Bossy Protector Page 6
