by Angel Lawson
“I can’t believe I did it.” I shudder and gag.
“Why did you do it?” Morgan asks.
I sigh. “It doesn’t matter. I thought I was protecting someone.”
“One of the guys?”
Tears prick at my eyes. “All of them.”
“He knows you love them.”
I look up. “I don’t—”
Rochelle laughs. “Sure you do, and they’re obsessed with you.”
There’s a knock on the door and I’m glad, almost. I don’t want to talk about my feelings for the guys. It was already confusing and complicated and hell if I didn’t just make it a thousand times worse.
“I don’t want to talk to anyone,” I say, sinking into the couch, wishing I could vanish.
Morgan opens the door. It’s Stella.
“Mr. Miller asked me to come get you.”
Perfect. My other humiliating moment wants to meet with me.
“Not now.”
“It wasn’t an option,” she says, glancing between the three of us. “Sorry.”
I can’t hide forever. I place my cup on the coffee table and stand.
“You don’t have to do this,” Rochelle says. “I can call my father and get someone up here to represent you and the guys. He’ll destroy whatever it is Trip is holding over you.”
I shake my head. “It’s fine. I can handle it.”
Stella walks with me down to Dorian’s office. The halls are eerily quiet. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad.
“For what it’s worth,” Stella says, as we approach the door, “It’s not as bad as it seems. Trip has dirt on everyone. It was bound to happen.”
I never want to get used to feeling like this.
There’s no reason to hesitate, so I open the door and step inside. I expected Dorian. I did not expect the K-Boys.
Dorian walks past me and shuts the door. I lean against it and wrap my arms around my waist, avoiding eye contact with all of them, especially Hawk.
“Trip Cohen just left the building in an ambulance. He’s not naming names. Any idea who did this to him?”
No one speaks, but there’s no denying Theo and Hawk’s busted knuckles.
I did this, and I know I need to own it. “I thought I could save everyone.”
“Eden?” Dorian frowns, clearly not expecting a confession. “What do you mean?”
“Trip knows everything going on here. He films it. Records it. Documents it. Then he goes back and creates evidence.” I look at Gray. “He had the ring from Mrs. Holmes' jewelry box. He was going to plant it in your room and turn you in for stealing. He was pissed you turned Mitch in for selling the test. I’m the one that asked you to do that.”
“Ring?” Dorian asks, clearly trying to keep up.
“And he threatened to give Theo drugs—get him hooked again.” I try to breathe. “I was so scared of what he’d do to you. All of you.”
Gray's eyes narrow, calculating what I’d just said, and Theo, he just looks down at his raw, bruised knuckles.
“You’re seriously going to say the reason you sucked his cock was to protect the three of us?” Hawk says suddenly. His tone is laced with venom. “You think we can’t take care of ourselves? I almost snapped his fucking neck in two back there, Princess. You think Gray can’t weasel his way out of a theft accusation? You think Theo is so weak he can’t say no to temptation.” He shakes his head. “I don’t know why you did it, I don’t know if you just fucking wanted it, but don’t blame this situation on us. We’re the K-Boys. We take care of garbage like that and we protect our own.”
White hot rage courses through me and I blindly push past the others to face Hawk. “The truth is that I did do it to protect you, but I also did it for something else. He’d told me all along that the only way to find out the truth about my sister was to get on my knees. So, I did it. He hit me in my weak spot. My family, which includes you as much as her. After you beat the shit out of him, he told me. You knew how I could find Hope all along. You know where she is.”
He reels but it doesn’t take the cold from his eyes. “I do. And I knew to leave it alone.”
“That’s not your call.”
“Like hell it isn’t.” His shoulders expand, taking up more room. “I make the calls in here, Eden, and I couldn’t look past the fact that Hope is obviously tied up with Trip and his brother, she also has no interest in seeing you. She looked you dead in the eye at that party and walked away.”
“I don’t believe you.” If only I could remember.
“You lose all common sense when it comes to her, you know that? That’s how you ended up in here in the first place! Chasing fucking Hope!”
I look around at the others before I jab my finger into his rock-hard chest. “It’s your fault I got on my knees for him. It’s your fault I licked my lips and moaned his name. This is on you for keeping secrets.”
Hawk’s eyes pulse and I swear he turns a shade of red I’ve never seen before. Rage rolls off his body and he lifts his hand. I narrow my eyes, daring him to take this out on me.
“I didn’t know you’d take the first change you got to be with him!”
“The first chance? He’s been begging me to do this—to do anything—with him since he got here. I said no. Over and over I said no.” I swallow back the shame. “But he had me and you all by the fucking balls, Hawk. I didn’t know I had a choice. You never told me I had a choice.”
Hawk crumbles before me, thrusting his hands into his hair and emits a guttural roar, like a man gone mad.
“Stop!” Dorian steps between us, hands holding us apart. “Stop. You were both protecting each other, or trying to—”
“While Trip gets exactly what he wants,” Gray adds with a shake of his head. “Sneaky bastard.”
Hawk throws his hands in the air before resting them on his neck. He turns around like he can’t bear to face me. Dorian gives me a look and nudges me back across the room.
Convinced Hawk and I aren’t going to tear each other apart, he steps back lowers his hands. “There’s a metric fuck-ton of damage control to do here.”
“Can’t you just kick him out?” Theo asks. “There’s the cabin and all the evidence there—”
“No,” Dorian says with the shake of his head. “Eden told me about everything stored at the cabin. I went down there first thing this morning with the head of security. The whole basement had been cleaned out.” He sighs. “Well, other than a file cabinet filled with incriminating evidence on the four of you.”
“Fuck,” Gray mutters under his breath. Hawk stares at the ground, hands balled tight.
“I’m going to need the break to talk to the administration and figure out how they want to handle this.” He looks between us. “There’s no way you can stay on campus during the holidays, not with all of this hanging over your heads.”
The air lets out of the room. For the most part, we have nowhere to go. “What are we supposed to do?” I ask. “My mom is still in rehab.”
“I can find placements,” Dorian says, but we all know that’s unlikely this close to Christmas.
Gray says, “There’s no fucking way I’m going to a group home.”
“I can call my mom,” Theo says, doubtfully. “She may let me come back. You know, if my grandfather is okay with it.”
“Send me to lock-up,” Hawk says quietly.
Dorian and I look at one another and we both know this is falling apart. If these guys go back on the streets or in detention, we’ll never get them back. Every positive from this experiment will be lost. “Give me twenty-four hours,” he says. “I’ll pull some strings.”
Hawk straightens and repeats. “Send me to lock-up. For good. I’m done with this bullshit.”
He’s out the door before any of us can react. I look at the guys, but they don’t—or can’t—hold my eye. There’s too much hurt and betrayal. A lack of trust. When they’re gone, I turn to Dorian.
“I was trying to help them,” I say quietly. H
onestly.
“I know.” He rubs his face, “The K-Boys—”
“Stop. I know what I did to them. To us.” I stare at the floor. “I know about their honor and jacked-up testosterone and hero complex.”
“You crushed them, Eden, but it’s fair to say that Hawk should have told you. You were trying to protect one another.”
“I’ve been looking for Hope for a long time. She’s always been my priority.”
“Maybe that’s what he doesn’t like? Playing second to a ghost.”
Second? Hawk is the most elusive of the boys. The hardest the reach. The least likely to cross the shaky line we’d established. Is that why he’s so angry? He wants to be my priority?
I have no response to that.
“Listen,” Dorian says, “I’m sorry about last night.”
“No.” I shake my head. “If anything has come out of this, it’s the fact I’m not reading situations right. I’m not playing by the right rules.”
“You’re vulnerable. Just like all of us.”
I frown, exhausted and filled with sadness. “I’m tired of being vulnerable.”
“Good. That’s when you’ll find your true strength.”
I walk out of the office understanding, for the first time, the concept of hitting rock bottom.
35
Eden
I’m on the way back to my room when I see him standing with his hands shoved in his pockets and his back against the wall.
I stop and look at him, at the pain etched on his face.
“What do you want?”
Theo pushes off the wall and strolls over casually, as though our lives aren’t shattering.
“To make sure you’re okay.”
“What? You’re going to pretend you’re okay with me sucking Trip’s—”
“Don’t.” He holds up his hands and grimaces. “Hell no, I’m not okay with it. I’m not okay with anyone hurting you. Ever.”
“I can’t take it back.” I taste the shame in my mouth and stare at the ground. The gentle touch of fingers lift my chin and I look up into anguished blue eyes.
“Princess, if this is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done, then we’ve all still got you beat.” He tilts his head. “We got outplayed—not just you, all of us.”
Tears burn at my eyes. “I don’t know how to make it better.”
Theo’s frame towers over mine. He’s a gentle giant and all I want is to be engulfed in his arms. But I don’t deserve it and he must agree, because although he reaches out to push my hair over my shoulder that’s all.
“It’s going to take time. Hawk? He’s going to have to calm down and come to terms with his part of it. He should have told you, and to be honest, we should have made him.”
“You knew?” I ask, feeling anger rise. What else are they keeping from me?
His jaw tightens. “Things were crazy that night. You were both drugged—him just a little less than you. Everything was a mess and,” he pauses, “Hawk’s right. Your obsession with your sister has gone somewhere dangerous.”
I open my mouth to argue, but I can’t. I truly can’t, but that doesn’t mean I can stop either. I have to find her. She’s my family.
“Look,” he says, “let’s take the night to cool off. I think we can regroup in the morning and figure out how we want to handle this, okay?”
I touch Theo’s cheek. He’s sweet and devoted. That night I found him in the shower bound us in a way I wasn’t able to comprehend at the time. He’s loyal. He’ll never look at me any other way, but the other two? I don’t see them being so forgiving, and I’m not sure if I can forgive.
So I lie, something that comes too easily. “Tomorrow. We’ll talk then.”
I take a step back, ready to run, but he closes the gap and wraps his arms around me. His hug is crushing, and he smells so good, almost enough to make me stay.
Almost.
I feel his lips press against my hair and when he releases me I dart to the stairway refusing to look back, because I know if I do, I may cave completely.
The first time I tried to run away from Sparrowood, I got caught up in saving Theo from an overdose on the bathroom floor.
The second time, I walk out the front door with my bag slung over my shoulder and my friend by my side. When I told Rochelle I needed somewhere to stay for the winter break, she invited me to come home with her. It’s intimidating, but I have little choice. I said yes and we both agreed leaving before dawn was probably the best way to avoid the gossip and drama in the morning.
The truth is that I’m terrified to face the K-Boys. They hate me and although I don’t hate them, I’m not sure what we had can be repaired. Even if it could, I’m not sure we’ll get the chance to do it.
Trip fucked up everything.
Hawk fucked up everything.
I fucked up everything.
The air is chilly and puffs of smoke waft through the air as we rush to the car. Rochelle cranks the engine, flipping on the heated leather seats and then turning up the radio, filling the vehicle with '80s pop.
“Are you sure your parents won’t mind?” I ask for the millionth time.
“Mother’s in the Catskills screwing her ski instructor. Daddy’s working non-stop and his secretary wants to go to Aruba. I was going to be home alone anyway. It’ll be nice to have company.”
Rochelle speeds down the driveway, headed toward the gate. She punches a stolen code into the keypad and the gates open outward, releasing us to a world away from damaged juvenile delinquents and manipulative Brats.
“Do you mind if we make a detour?” I ask, pulling up the address on my phone. I hold it out for her.
Her eyebrow, perfectly sculpted and shaped, arches in question. “Asherville State?”
“Yeah,” I say. I can’t let this go until I see her and find out the truth for myself. “I want to go see my sister.”
Afterword
Sparrowood 3 is on pre-order! Grab it today!
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Acknowledgments
Readers!
Thank you all for all the love and support for Sparrowood Academy. As usual, I tend to march to the beat of my own drum and Sparrowood is slightly off from the bully, PNR, magic school twist, but it’s a story I’ve wanted to tell so thank you for reading!
Quick thanks to all the readers at Angel’s Antics! You help me get motivated to write every day! Thank you to Jennifer, Lisa M., Lisa S, & Kiki for daily support. I braced myself for your reaction on this one. I knew how you reacted would be a compass for how it was going to be received.
Always thanks to @angstyg designs and @vcedits. You always come through even when I’m flying by the seat of my pants.
Book #3 comes out soon! See you then!
Angel
Also by Angel Lawson
Angel Lawson Books
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(Reverse Harem)
Sparrowood Academy
Book 1
Book 2
Book 3
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The Wayward Sons (Contemporary YA)
Starlee’s Heart
Starlee’s Turn
Starlee’s Home
Starlee’s Hope
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The Allendale Four (Contemporary YA-Series Complete)
A Piece of Heaven: The Allendale Four
Holding on to Heaven: The Allendale Four Book 2
The Road to Heaven: The Allendale Four Book 3
Seventh Heaven: The Allendale Four Book 4 (November 2018)
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Boys of Ocean Beach (Contemporary YA- Series Complete)
Summer’s Kiss (The Boys of Ocean Beach)
Summer’s Fun (The Boys of Ocean Beach 2)
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Raven Queen’s Harem (Series Complete)
Raven’s Mark (Part 1)
Ebony Rising (Part 2)
Black Magic (Part 3)
Obsidian
Fire (Part 4)
Onyx Eclipse (Part 5)
Midnight’s End (Part 6)
*Raven’s Gift (Holiday Novella)
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Huntress: Trial of Gods
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(Reverse Harem Alien Romance)
Taking Mercy: Planet Athion Book 1 Finding Mercy: Planet Athion Book 2
Saving Mercy: Planet Athion Book 3
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(Reverse Harem Superheroes)
The Elites: Supers of Project 12
Sentinels: Supers of Project 12 (Book 2)
Rogues: Supers of Project 12 (Book 3)
Heroes: Supers of Project 12 (Book 4)
The Death Fields: A Post Apocalyptic Thriller
The Girl Who Shot First
The Girl Who Punched Back
The Girl Who Kicked Ass
The Girl Who Kissed the Sun
The Girl Who Broke Free
The Girl Who Saved the World
Creature of Habit Series (Paranormal Romance)
Creature of Habit (Book 1)
Creature of Habit (Book2)
Creature of Habit (Book 3)
A Vampire’s Seduction (Ryan’s Story Book 4)
A Vampire’s Fate (Sebastian’s Story Book 5)
