by Dean Lorey
She pointed at each child in turn with a crusty fingernail. Charlie noticed that there were too many knuckles on her finger - as many as five. “Eeeny, meeny, miny, mo…drain a human, let it go! Or maybe I don’t let it go! Maybe I just drain the miserable thing and then eat it all up! I mean, look at me - I’m positively wasting away…” She rubbed the rolls of fat on her belly.
“ENOUGH,” the Smith said, leaping forward. “There’s only ONE child available to you today. THIS one.”
He nodded towards Theodore. The Hag Queen surveyed the boy with an arched eyebrow, clearly disappointed.
“He’s such a little fish - and he’s all bones. Why not just give him to me and let me fatten him up a bit?”
“NO. He must stay here and you must take his sacrifice NOW.”
She stuck out her bottom lip in a mock pout. “Spoilsport!” Then, with a gentle flutter of her wings, she flew to Theodore. “Why don’t you tell that mean old frog to leave us alone so you can come and play with me, sweetie? Would you like that? Would you like to live in my glorious mansion, your every need attended to by my Ladies-in-Hating?” She batted her eyes at him flirtatiously. “Hmmm, child?”
“I, uh…” Theodore’s voice was raspy with revulsion. “I don’t think so, ma’am. In fact, I’m going to say that’s a definite NW - no way.”
The Hag’s eyes hardened. “Too bad.” She turned back to the Smith. “So what’s it to be then? Which memories am I to drain from the child? Tell me quick - he bores me.”
The Smith grinned. “Then perhaps this will interest you. You will take away every last vestige of his FRIENDSHIP with the boy known as Charlie Benjamin.”
“No…” Theodore gasped.
No! Charlie thought. Not that!
The Smith continued. “You will drink deeply of every experience they have ever HAD, every - crooooak! - moment they have ever shared. Charlie Benjamin is the most important thing in his life and now he will SACRIFICE their friendship.”
“You can’t do that to him…” Violet said.
Definitely not! Charlie thought, although he couldn’t say it out loud. Don’t, Theodore. Don’t let her do this…
Theodore backed away from the Hag Queen, panic rising in his eyes. “Please, pick something else. Anything else.”
The Hag became excited. “Yes! Look how it frightens him! These memories must mean a great deal to the child…Ooooh, just think how they’ll taste!” She began to drool. “Mmmmmm, delicious! Delightful! Delectable, even!” Her black tongue flickered in and out and she eagerly licked her fingers. “Oh, my! I will drink all his tasty memories, yes, indeed - every last drop - and when I am done, the boy will no longer even be able to remember Charlie Benjamin’s name…”
She snatched Theodore up in her strong arms, then enfolded him in her wings and unfurled her tongue to its full, horrible length - it whipped through the air like a putrid worm.
“Say goodbye to Charlie…” she cackled.
“Forget this,” Violet said. Raising her axe high, she reached out and snatched the Hag’s tongue, preparing to chop it off at the root.
“Wait!” Theodore shouted.
Violet paused, her body thrumming with rage. Theodore continued.
“You can’t stop this, Violet. At least you shouldn’t. Brooke has already suffered and so will you. We’ve all got to do this to give Charlie a chance - because if he doesn’t have one, no one does.”
Violet considered. “I really don’t care.”
She chopped off the Hag’s tongue. In a fountain of black ichor, the meaty, severed tube dropped to the ground, where it spasmed and writhed like a python.
Well, that’s that, Charlie thought.
Even though he was thrilled to see his friend spared the terrible kiss of the Hag, that thought was soon pushed aside by another - one more darkly practical.
If Theodore doesn’t sacrifice this, how in the world are we ever going to get the sword?
Suddenly, to everyone’s horror, the nub of tongue that remained in the Hag’s mouth began to grow, shooting from between her scaly lips like fishing line playing out. Within moments, it was the same length as before.
“No more games!” the Hag Queen screeched and Charlie was surprised by the fierceness in her voice - usually, she liked to toy with people more. “No more bargains. No more delays. It’s time to feast.”
Theodore turned to Charlie then, fighting back tears. “Goodbye, DT. You were my best friend. Seriously. Remember that.”
And before Charlie could let Theodore know that the feeling was mutual, the Hag plunged her hideous tongue deep into his friend’s ear - down, down, into his brain - and began to suck. Memories rushed away from Theodore, like an express train leaving a station, and he savoured each one in the fleeting seconds before it was gone.
The first time he and Charlie had met, high up in the pirate ship at the very top of the Nightmare Academy. How lost Charlie had looked then, sitting quietly on the worn, wooden bench. How very alone. Theodore had known instantly that the two of them would become friends. That it was, somehow…inevitable. He had never made friends easily - most people considered him far too strange - but in Charlie, he had finally, after all these years, found a soulmate.
As soon as Theodore thought it, the memory was gone, followed by another one - this one tied closely to a single emotion. Pride.
The pride Theodore felt on the beach at the Nightmare Academy, as he shared with Charlie the details of the extraordinary courage and quick thinking he had displayed during Slagguron’s terrible attack on the great tree. His portals had saved Mama Rose, along with countless other students, from the rampage of that foul worm. That was the day he had come into his own as a Nethermancer, the day he had finally embraced that great and difficult art, and the pride he had felt from his accomplishment was unparalleled. Charlie had been genuinely thrilled for his friend’s success and, to Theodore, that had meant, well, everything.
Gone.
The Hag sucked it away and stored it in her monstrous brain along with all his other memories of Charlie - the tears of failure and the shouts of laughter during moments of great happiness, all the frustrations and the joys and the tragedies and triumphs that make up the intricate fabric of any true friendship.
All gone now.
Stolen - by a monster - to give a friend Theodore could no longer even remember a chance to save the world. The Hag Queen let him go then, sucking that long tongue back into her mouth. She licked her lips in something like ecstasy. “Yes! Good! Wonderful, in fact! Tasty! Tasty! TASTY!”
Theodore crumpled to the ground and Violet rushed to his side. She held the trembling boy, who stared up at her in confusion.
“Where am I?” he asked.
She wiped a tear from her eye and did her best to smile comfortingly. “With friends.”
“Really?” He looked around, glassy-eyed. “I don’t recognise anyone.”
“Not even me?”
He shook his head. “I don’t think so. Maybe…You look sort of familiar, but it’s hard to…” He focused intently on her, clearly struggling to figure out where he might know her from. Then he finally gave up and shrugged. “Not sure. Sorry. Have we met?”
“We have.”
“Huh. Weird.” Theodore turned to Charlie with a quizzical look in his eyes. “And you - I don’t recognise you at all. Do I know you?”
It took all of Charlie’s effort to break through the paralysis from the Shock Wasp and reply, although he could only manage one small word: “No.”
Just saying it made him sick - but what other option did he have? Why torment his friend? Why make him struggle to recall memories and connections that were now lost? Charlie was sure that no was the right answer…and yet it broke his heart to say it.
Theodore nodded. “Yeah, didn’t think so. Too bad. You’re definitely missing out. I’m actually pretty spectacular.” He rose shakily to his feet. “So can I go home now? I think I need to get back to the Academy. They’re going to
be declaring us Banishers or Nethermancers pretty soon and I definitely don’t want to miss that. I’m going to be a Banisher obviously, just like my dad. He’s one of the greatest Banishers of all time, you know - just like the rest of my family. I mean, that’s just a fact. Hey, maybe you can meet him sometime!”
Violet nodded. “Sure. Maybe we can.”
“Excellent!”
The Smith stepped towards the Hag. “It is done. The boy has SACRIFICED. BEGONE.”
“With pleasure.” She turned to Theodore and smiled ghoulishly. “Goodbye, sweetie. And if you ever want to come and visit a gorgeous little cupcake like myself, my offer still stands. We can have such fun together.” She blew him a kiss - it smelled like rotten meat - then flew away with a cackle.
There was silence then, a sense of impending doom. Charlie knew what was coming next, they all did, and he dreaded it to his core. Finally, the Smith turned to Violet and asked his question.
“Do YOU, Violet Sweet, agree to SACRIFICE that which is most important to you so that Charlie Benjamin can wield the SWORD?”
Violet, tired and alone, gave her answer.
CHAPTER ELEVEN A RELUCTANT REUNION
Deep inside the Nightmare Academy, the Headmaster’s study was quiet and still. A small, bird-like Snark nibbled away at a wooden railing. Suddenly, it looked up, alarmed, as a fiery portal burst open in the centre of the room, filling it with light and heat. Tabitha Greenstreet rushed through, followed by Rex, who carried the Headmaster in his strong arms.
“Place me on the couch, Mr Henderson,” she commanded, gesturing to a worn bamboo sofa covered in a dark, wine-coloured fabric.
“I can bring you up to your bed if you’d be more comfor—”
“The couch,” she repeated sternly, “will be just fine.”
Rex gently set the Headmaster down, careful not to aggravate her wounds. “You hungry? You need anything from the galley? Biscuits or something?”
She shook her head. “What I need is for you to check on my students and make sure they are safe from the wrath of those infernal Elemental Golems.”
“Right away,” Tabitha said with a nod. “But let me portal you somewhere else while we do it. The Nightmare Division will be looking for you here. We’re still in exile, you know.”
The Headmaster waved away her concern. “The day I start worrying about Director Drake’s insane ‘orders’ is the day I resign as Headmaster.” She sighed wearily. “I only wish I knew how Mr Benjamin and his friends were faring…”
“Tabby and I can go check up on ’em,” Rex said. “Maybe we can give ’em a hand. We’d love to do it.”
“I know you would, Rexford. But unfortunately, the threat they are facing is from something dying inside themselves - something precious and irreplaceable. It is not from a monster we can slay.”
And that was when they heard the voice - so deep and loud that the entire tree shook with its thunder.
“YOUNG MR BENJAMIN! Come out here, boy! Come and talk to your old friend!”
Rex and Tabitha glanced at each other.
“Can’t be…” the cowboy said.
They raced to the balcony off the Headmaster’s study and looked out on to the beach beyond the great tree. Something was standing there near the crashing waves, something huge and monstrous.
“Pinch?” Rex asked, staring in dismay. “That you?”
The gigantic antlike creature nodded. His enormous legs, as thick as the Academy’s lower branches, were dug into the white sand beneath him like pilings supporting a pier. “Yes, it is me. Surprised?”
“A little. I mean, you were never the most attractive son-of-a-gun on the planet, but now you’re takin’ ugly to a whole new level.”
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Rexford. I happen to think I’m quite the catch. That is, if you could catch me - which you can’t. No mere human can any more. Certainly not these fools, although they tried.”
Pinch opened his massive fists, allowing the corpses of several Banishers to tumble to the soft sand like rag dolls.
Rex grimaced - even after the deaths he’d dealt in his life, he still hated to see it. “Where did they come from?”
“The Netherforge. I went there to look for our mutual friend, Charlie Benjamin, but unfortunately, he was not present.”
That’s probably because he’s still in the Chamber of Ancient Weapons, Rex thought darkly, trying to get the sword.
“Well, it’s a dang shame you didn’t get to meet up with him,” the cowboy replied. “Anything I can help you with? Or did you come here just to reminisce about the good old days?”
“I wasn’t aware there were any.” Pinch stepped forward. “I thought, perhaps, that Charlie Benjamin might be here with you.”
“Sorry, Pinch. Ain’t seen him. Hey, have you tried calling Directory Ant-sistance? Maybe they could help.”
“Ant-sistance? Is that an ant joke?”
“Yeah, but you ain’t laughing, so I guess it wasn’t a very good one.”
Pinch took another step forward. “You will either bring young Mr Benjamin here to me or I will tear every ship from the Academy’s branches until I find him.”
“Now I don’t know why we gotta resort to violence. I mean, why can’t we just talk this out like two grown men - you know, man-to-mant?”
“Mant? Another ant joke?”
“Yeah, but that was a pretty good one, I think.” Pinch smiled. “Do you? So will you assist me, Rexford - or shall I simply kill you now?”
Rex raised a finger. “Just hold that thought.” He turned to Tabitha and whispered, “Well, darlin’, looks like this is the end of the road. Now here’s what you’re gonna do - go get the Headmaster and start portalling everyone outta here.”
“You want to run?” she whispered. “Let’s stay and fight.”
“Fight? You see what Pinch looks like now? He’s the size of a building and crazy to boot. No fighting’s gonna happen here - only dying - and if we try it, we’re gonna take a lot of students with us. I can’t chance that.” He turned back to Pinch and shouted: “OK, I made my decision. I’m gonna go with option two - the one where you ‘kill me now’.”
Rex threw his lasso up to the prow of the wrecked ship above him and swung out on it - straight at Pinch - like Tarzan on a vine. Pinch snatched him from the air with a giant claw.
“Rex!” Tabitha yelled. “What in the world are you doing?”
“What I need to, just like you need to do what I told ya to!” Rex turned back to Pinch - this close, his red, plated face loomed like the side of a skyscraper. “OK, Ugly, you got me. Now go ahead and do what you promised - kill me now. Go on. Squeeze me to death. Pop off my head like a cork - shouldn’t take but a second.”
“What are you up to, Rexford?” Pinch asked, eyes narrowing.
“Up to? Dang, Pinch, you always think everyone’s got an ulterior motive just cos you always got one. Now go on and squeeze. Here, I’ll give you a count - one, two, three, squeeze!”
“Stop that!”
“What?” Rex looked genuinely befuddled. “What’s the problem now?”
“You’re trying to control things. I’m the one in charge here - not you!”
“Geez, obviously you’re in charge, Pinch. I mean, you’re the killer here - I’m just the killee. Now here we go: one, two, three, squeeze!”
“I said STOP IT!”
“Or what? You’ll kill me?”
Pinch groaned. “You are the single most frustrating human being in existence, do you know that?”
Rex grinned. “Guilty as charged. Just ask Tabitha. She’ll go on and on about it.”
I’ll be danged, Rex thought. This crazy plan is actually working.
He knew that Pinch wanted - more than anything - to be the most powerful one around. As long as he kept insisting that Pinch kill him right away, Rex was pretty sure that the vain man would refuse. After all, no one could tell Edward Pinch what to do! It wasn’t a great plan, but Rex hoped that, with a
little luck, it would at least give Tabitha enough time to evacuate the students from the Academy before Pinch could turn his full fury on them.
“Let’s just get back to the business at hand,” the cowboy said, “which is the killing of little old me. Now you just do exactly what I tell you, Pinch. On the count of three - squeeze. Here we go. One, two, three - squeeze!”
Then, to Rex’s horror, Pinch did.
Deep in the Chamber of Ancient Weapons, Violet turned to the Smith.
“Whatever the sacrifice is, I accept it so that Charlie can get the sword.”
“EXCELLENT.”
The giant frog’s eyes glittered and Charlie, still paralysed, was repulsed to see how thrilled the creature was to inflict more pain.
How many other seekers have there been? he wondered. And how much did their friends suffer at the whim of the Smith? Given the extraordinary toll taken on the people involved, Charlie thought it would have been a miracle if anyone had ever actually laid hands on the priceless weapon.
Of course, it wasn’t actually priceless - it had a price. A terrible one.
“Brooke BRIGHTON,” the Smith said, turning to the girl. “I require you to open a PORTAL.”
She snorted angrily. “Why would I - crooooak! - ever help you?”
“Because if you do NOT, then your sacrifice will be in vain and Charlie Benjamin will not get the sword!”
“Ask Theodore to open one - he’s better at it than me.”
“Not any more,” the Smith replied with a sneer. “Now open a portal, girl - to the Nightmare Division!”
Gritting her teeth, she did. A purple portal snapped open into the heart of the High Council chamber, startling several employees working there.
“YOU!” the Smith yelled, pointing a warty finger at a man in an orange jumpsuit as he mopped the floor. “Get General Dagget here now. Tell him the SMITH is ready with - crooooak! - the SACRIFICE.”
The sacrifice. Charlie suddenly realised what the Smith intended to do and his heart sank. He wondered if Violet suspected as well and he could see from her grim expression that she did.
