by Aurora Rey
The full reality of her life and choices came crashing down on her. Not in a devastating or traumatic sort of way. More like an ostrich with its head in the sand. Focusing on the Rose & Crown had been so easy. It demanded her energy and her skills, challenged her to do and try things she never had before. Along the way, it had stopped feeling like a means to an end. That wasn’t a bad thing in itself, but it wasn’t a viable long-term plan. Nor did she want it to be.
She just needed to remember that and keep perspective. That went for the career and the plans she’d left in New York as much as the heart and soul she’d poured into making over the pub. And whether she liked to admit it or not, it also went for her relationship with Cam.
Chapter Twenty-two
With the grand reopening only a day away, Lauren felt like she should be frantic. Really, though, everything was ready. More than ready, actually. Thanks to Cam’s help and Anja’s last-minute design inspiration, both the pub and the inn were ready to show off. She almost felt bad about closing the pub to the public for a couple of days since she didn’t technically need to, but it would build excitement.
She could use all the excitement she could get.
The inn was booked to capacity with invited guests. Everyone in town was buzzing with enthusiasm. That would only carry her so far, though. If the excitement didn’t carry over into sustained bookings and more daily customers, she’d be no better off than when she started. Worse, really, since she’d sunk close to a hundred grand of her savings into the place.
She wouldn’t think that way. She couldn’t. Lauren stood up from her desk and decided to go in search of Charlotte. She could obsess about Cam instead.
Charlotte was at her usual spot behind the bar, arranging bottles. She looked up at Lauren and smiled. “Have I thanked you yet today for my new setup?”
Lauren chuckled. “Not yet today, but I think you’ve thanked me a hundred times, so we’re good.”
“It’s so perfect, though.”
“And a solid management decision on your part. Having a stylish and functional space behind the bar makes for a better experience for those in front of it.”
“Right.” Charlotte nodded. She’d settled into her additional responsibilities nicely. Whatever Lauren ultimately did with the place, she felt good about how the pub would be managed. And she’d do everything in her power to make sure Charlotte stayed on.
“Are you feeling ready for tomorrow?” Lauren asked.
“Beyond ready. Cam and I were just talking about how far everything has come.”
Lauren laughed at the choice of phrase. “And I think she might finally believe it’s a good thing.”
Charlotte’s face softened. “She really does, you know.”
“I do.” Lauren sighed, uneasy, but unable to put her finger on why.
“Change hasn’t always been a good thing in her life, if you know what I mean.” The way Charlotte looked down, shrugged slightly, made Lauren want to press.
“I know it’s technically none of my business, but,” she hesitated for a moment, not sure how much she wanted to know. “You and Cam?”
Charlotte smiled. “You want to know the specifics of our history?”
“I mean, yes, but you’re completely within your rights to tell me it’s none of my damn concern.”
“I’m pretty open, in case you hadn’t noticed.”
“Oh, I noticed.” From talking about herself to the easy way she’d clicked with Anja, Lauren had both admired and envied Charlotte’s obvious comfort with feelings and relationships.
“There really isn’t that much to tell beyond what I already have. I’m not the one who broke her heart.”
Lauren’s own heart lurched. Was it wrong to learn details like this from someone other than Cam herself? “Who was?”
“Her name was Amelia. I shouldn’t overstate matters. It wasn’t some devastating heartbreak for the ages or anything.”
“But?”
“But it just reinforced all her instincts that change is a bad thing.”
“Oh.” That explained a lot.
“They were together for a while. Two years, maybe? I never thought they were right for each other, but I’m pretty sure Cam would have married her.”
It was clearly in the past, but the thought of Cam marrying another woman did unpleasant things to her stomach. “Why didn’t she?”
“Amelia was a restless sort. Wanted to move to London and live a more fast-paced life. Cam took it really personally that Netherfield wasn’t enough for her.”
Or that Cam wasn’t enough. It made perfect sense that Cam started out resistant to her ideas, to her very presence. “Thank you for sharing that with me.”
Charlotte shrugged again. “None of it is secret, really.”
No, but it was information she’d not gotten from Cam. Not that Cam was withholding, just that they’d had no conversations about past relationships. Even without knowing what her future with Cam would be—or if it would be—understanding her better mattered.
As if summoned by their conversation, Cam rapped a knuckle on the window of the pub door. Lauren hurried over to unlock it and Cam walked in carrying a large flat parcel wrapped in brown paper. Lauren raised a brow. “What’cha got there?”
Cam offered her a playful smile. “A present.”
“For me?” Lauren indicated herself.
“Sort of.”
She planted her hands on her hips and feigned exasperation. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Cam shrugged, the playful expression not leaving her face. “It’s a little bit for you, but also for the pub.”
Art. It had to be a picture or painting of some sort. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“I wanted to. A housewarming gift of sorts. Or pub warming.” She extended the parcel toward Lauren.
Lauren took it from her and could feel the frame through the wrapping. “Do I get to open it now?”
Cam chuckled. “Yes, you do.”
Lauren tore into the paper. Her parents had never been big on gifts. Holiday presents were often money or a trip. Small, thoughtful things never factored in, certainly not for no reason. Just the fact that Cam had gone to the trouble meant more than she wanted to admit.
She recognized Albert’s face immediately, if from the few photos she’d seen more than from memory. It was a portrait, but nothing stuffy or formal. He was painted in a style similar to her woodland creatures, in a tweed jacket and with a jaunty expression on his face. Not quite cartoon, but definitely whimsical.
“Oh, my God.”
“It’s the same artist as the one who did your animals. She remembered you and was happy to do something on commission when I told her the story.”
They’d argued about those damned paintings. Getting Cam on board with them had been such a battle. A silly, stupid battle, but one of the first places they’d really compromised. Lauren’s eyes filled, the tears spilling over.
“You don’t have to hang it in the pub. You can put it in your office or tuck it out of the way if you don’t like it.”
There was a trace of worry in Cam’s voice. The last little thread holding Lauren’s heart back gave way. She shook her head. “It’s perfect.”
“You don’t have to say that. I know you weren’t all that close to Albert.”
Lauren sniffed and tried to swipe away the tears without ruining her mascara. “I feel closer to him now than I ever did when he was alive. This place is so him. I love the idea of paying him tribute.”
“He’d be happy with the changes you’ve made. I hope you know that.”
She started crying in earnest then—for the man she’d hardly known, for the unexpected turn of events that saved her from the darkest moment in her life, and for the future that felt like a massive question mark.
Cam took the framed canvas from her and set it on a nearby table. She wrapped her arms around Lauren and pulled her close. She didn’t mind when women cried, although she wished she had a be
tter sense of what had upset Lauren so. “Shh. It’s okay.”
“They’re happy tears.” The words came out staccato, in time with Lauren’s choppy breathing.
Her mother did that—cried when she was really happy. It didn’t usually come out with quite so much sobbing. Not that she was judging, she just wanted to be sure she’d not struck a bad sort of nerve. She continued stroking Lauren’s back, attempting to soothe both of them. “Okay, then.”
After a long moment, Lauren pulled away. Her eyes were red and puffy, her makeup a bit of a mess. Rather than being turned off, it made Cam feel tender. Protective, but also proud. Desire, but something deeper.
The reality of it hit her like a kick to the stomach. Somehow, somewhere along the way, she’d brought herself to the precipice of falling in love with Lauren. Cam tried to offer her a smile even as her own breathing hitched. This was not the time or the place to have this conversation, and not only because she had no idea if her feelings were reciprocated.
As if to reinforce her thoughts, the pub door opened and a man came in with a keg of beer on a dolly. Charlotte crossed into Cam’s line of vision, reminding her she’d been there the whole time. She waved a hand in their direction and greeted the delivery guy by name.
They were standing in the middle of the pub. And even if the pub wasn’t open and bustling with patrons at that very second, they were one day from what might turn out to be the biggest day of both their careers. It was not the time to get sappy.
“Are you sure you’re all right?” Cam asked.
“I am. Promise.” Lauren offered a smile and nodded. She seemed sincere.
“Okay.”
“I love it. Absolutely love it. And I know just where it’s going to go.” Lauren picked up the painting and carried it to the wall adjacent to the bar. She took down the painting that was there—a traditional hunting scene—and hung the portrait. “What do you think?”
Cam had envisioned the painting in that exact spot. She’d even used it to give the artist an estimate of measurements. “It’s perfect.”
Lauren stood back and smiled. “It really is. Thank you.”
Cam cleared her throat, suddenly anxious to change the subject. “How are you feeling about tomorrow? Do you need help with anything?”
Lauren took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “I think we’re all set.”
Paired with the streaky mascara, she looked like she’d come through some sort of epic battle. It was an interesting juxtaposition to the fragile look she’d had just a moment before. Although the former had tapped into something deep inside Cam, the latter suited Lauren better.
“You’re feeling good about the staff?” she asked. Lauren had hired some temporary staff to work the event, including a couple of people from the distillery. Cam had helped Charlotte train them on the cocktail menu for the night, including the signature drink, the one featuring Carriage House, that Lauren had decided to name the Gin Flip.
“I really am. I think it’s going to go well.” She tipped her head to the side. “As long as people show up.”
“They will.” The idea that people might not come hadn’t occurred to her. Even if she wasn’t the most optimistic person, she had the sense that Lauren didn’t fail at anything she set her mind to.
“They will.” Lauren nodded again, more determined than the first time.
“I should let you get back to whatever.” Even though the last thing she wanted to do in that moment was leave.
“Yeah. I need to go check in on the kitchen and,” she moved a hand back and forth in front of her face, “fix this.”
“Text me if you need anything, okay?”
Lauren smiled. “I will.”
“Not that you need it, but good luck.” It surprised her just how much she meant it.
“Thanks.” Lauren leaned in and kissed her lightly. “For everything.”
Cam took the long way back to the distillery, soaking up the sunshine and ruminating on just how close she was to falling for Lauren. The shock of that first moment had already faded. In its place, more of a calm certainty. Certainty about her feelings, at least. She might not have wanted to, but she wasn’t one to deny reality. Of course, she had no idea what Lauren’s feelings were. They’d need to talk after the opening.
Lauren hadn’t said much about leaving, but she’d not talked about staying, either. Did she miss her life in New York? Did she miss anyone she’d left there?
Cam shook her head. No point pondering questions she couldn’t answer. They’d talk and she’d get her answers. Then she’d know what to do going forward. In the meantime, she needed to get ready herself. It might be the grand reopening of the Rose & Crown, but it was a debut of sorts for Carriage House as well. And since she’d agreed to be the face of it, she’d have a lot of hands to shake and schmoozing to do. If that wasn’t enough to distract her from the state of her heart, she didn’t know what was.
Chapter Twenty-three
Cam wasn’t one for fancy parties, but when the day actually arrived, she found herself looking forward to it. Part of it was being involved, not just in the planning of the event, but in the underlying work it was celebrating. Part of it was being so happy with that work. Lauren had taken her opinions to heart and the result was a place that felt fresh but authentic.
It also proved impossible not to be pulled in by Lauren’s enthusiasm. It was downright infectious, and she’d included not only Cam, but a good chunk of the town. It hadn’t occurred to Cam, but having something to rally around had brought people together. The renewed sense of community made her far less worried about an influx of tourists. And the potential influx of money, well, that would do everyone good.
She did a fairly good job of convincing herself that was the sum of her feelings, but it didn’t work entirely. The reality was that the party represented an end of sorts—an end to the project that brought them together, and an end to Lauren’s grand plans. Cam had no idea what would come next and, if she thought about it too hard, it terrified her.
For the tenth or so time in the last few hours, she shook it off. Today was too important to borrow trouble. There’d be plenty of time to worry about the future tomorrow.
She finished getting dressed, opting for a tie with the one suit she owned for important business meetings. She’d let Jane help her pick out a new shirt which helped her feel more like a classy dyke out on the town and less like a banker. Hopefully, Lauren would agree, especially since she’d made a thing about Cam being her date and not just another guest. She had no idea what Lauren would be wearing, but no doubt she’d look absolutely gorgeous.
On the walk to the pub, her stomach started doing this weird thing that felt like butterflies. Which was such a soppy phrase, but she couldn’t find another one that fit. Was she nervous on Lauren’s behalf or her own?
The pub doors were locked, but lights blazed from the inside. Even though it was still light out, the windows emitted a warm and welcoming glow. She could see Charlotte behind the bar, giving directions to the staff. Cam tapped on the glass to get her attention.
Charlotte looked up and smiled, then hurried over to let her in. “Don’t you look like a stunner.”
“As do you.” Cam leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. “I can’t remember the last time I saw you in a dress.”
Charlotte poked her in the chest. “That’s because you only see me behind the bar.”
“Fair do’s.” Cam looked her up and down. The black dress fit her perfectly, showing off curves she often kept hidden, and the smoky eye makeup gave her a sultry look that suited her. “You really do look pretty.”
Charlotte stepped back and did a turn. “Thank you. I bought it special.”
Cam caught movement out of the corner of her eye and turned, expecting to see Lauren. Instead, she found herself looking at Anja, beyond hip in skinny black pants and a paisley button-down with a loose-fitting tie—a look Cam couldn’t even pretend to pull off. Charlotte seemed to be appreciatin
g it on an entirely different level. She’d have to ask her about that the next time they were alone.
“You’re here.”
Cam turned toward the sound of Lauren’s voice. It might be cliché, but she’d have sworn her heart stopped. Lauren wore a shimmery pewter cocktail dress that hit every line of her body just right. The scooped neckline revealed only a hint of cleavage, but knowing what was underneath made her mouth water. Her hair was pinned up in an elaborate twist, and she wore impossibly high heels. She looked every inch the glamorous New York City powerhouse, and Cam had a moment of disbelief that she’d managed to capture the attention of such a woman.
But then Lauren smiled, the kind of knowing smile that’s only shared between people who know one another intimately, and every magical detail roared through her brain. Cam swallowed, not entirely trusting her voice. She cleared her throat and said, “You look amazing.”
“So do you.” Lauren walked slowly toward her, hips swaying slightly with each step. Her dress caught the light, making her appear almost ethereal.
Cam allowed one hand to graze up Lauren’s side. The fabric was silky against her fingers and so thin she could feel the warmth of Lauren’s skin. Cam leaned in and kissed her softly, not wanting to ruin her makeup, but she lingered, unable to pull herself away from the feel of Lauren’s mouth on hers. The sound of whistles coming from the bar reminded Cam she and Lauren weren’t alone. She stepped back reluctantly.
Mrs. Lucas came bustling out of the kitchen with a pair of waiters in tow. And like a switch being flipped, the entire pub came to life. The band arrived to set up, the first wave of food emerged from the kitchen to be arranged artfully on a table in the corner. Everyone seemed to want Lauren’s attention at once.
Cam stepped back, a little in awe of how smoothly Lauren gave directions and instilled a mixture of confidence and enthusiasm in each person who had a role to play in the evening. Finally, just a few minutes before the door was slated to open, Lauren turned that attention to her.
