by Robin Kaye
Shaking from fear and the cold cutting like knives into her feet and shins, she hugged herself and squatted, afraid she’d fall. The trees seemed to draw nearer, overshadowing her. Panic ebbed closer and bubbled like the river, numbing her. Her vision grayed, and she did her best to breathe without hyperventilating.
She had to get out of there. She wasn’t that same six-year-old who had cried for three days straight in the Pine Barrens, and she wasn’t lost—or at least she hoped she wasn’t. She had the ability to traverse the New York subway system blindfolded. She should be able to find her way back to the cabin. She was a grown woman. A naked grown woman. Toni took a deep breath and stood. The shock of blood rushing from her head made her wish she’d taken it a bit slower. Shivering, she eyed the river, trying to retrace her steps to the hot spring.
Hunter wasn’t coming back. He’d left her. He was probably dead. She wiped away the tears streaming down her face, trying to clear her vision enough to find her bathing suit.
“I’m okay. I’m okay. I’m okay.” But a vision of Hunter’s battered body kept intruding on her mantra.
She had to get back to the cabin and call 9-1-1 to report Hunter missing. She grabbed her suit and tugged it up her legs. Did they even have 9-1-1 here in the middle of nowhere? She wasn’t sure. No one told her what to do in the event a man you were making out with suddenly took off and dove into the river. Tugging on a wet bathing suit was not an easy thing to do, especially with hands that shook like wind chimes in a tornado.
Toni tried to remember where Hunter had left her shoes. She had to get to the cabin. Get a phone. Call for help.
Pain, deep and heavy, crushed like an anvil sitting on her chest. Shallow breathing made her light-headed. Through tears she found her shoes, stabbed her feet into them, and took off at a dead run in the direction of the cabin—or at least she hoped it was the direction of the cabin.
All the rocks looked the same. Where had they turned toward the river? She climbed over a boulder, jumped down, and ran, praying she’d find the trail.
Toni scraped past branches cutting her arms and legs. She tripped and fell. Her knee ached, but she didn’t waste time brushing it off. She just ran. The trail opened in front of her, and she turned to her right, sprinting, jumping over the step where Hunter had first kissed her. Dead. Dear God, he was in her arms one minute and dead the next. She wiped the tears from her eyes and saw the cabin in the distance. She had to find a phone. Call for help. But what did it matter? Hunter was gone, and she was alone.
***
Right after Toni came apart in Hunter’s arms, something tan flew past the edge of his peripheral vision. He turned his head just in time to see his shorts float out of the spring and into the river. His shorts with his wallet, containing all of his ID and the keys to his truck. “Fuck!”
He flew from beneath her and jumped over the rock into the river. By the time cold water hit him, expelling all the air from his lungs, his shorts floated downriver on the current.
Hunter swam past his eddy hoping his shorts would get caught in it, but no such luck. The white water enveloped him as he swam hard. His shorts bobbed a body-length ahead, drifting toward the center of the river he knew as well as his own limits.
Shit. If he didn’t catch them in the next few seconds, they were gone for good. He kicked hard and ignored the cold as he slid around a rock and grabbed for his shorts, wrapping the fabric around his hand before turning to swim for shore. The river had taken him downstream faster than he’d hoped. This was not good.
He swam as if his life depended upon it, and knowing the river like he did, it might. Things started getting really hairy a little farther downstream. He probably should have let the damn shorts go. By the time he pulled himself from the river, he was a hairsbreadth away from some seriously scary shit. Not smart. If anyone else on his team had pulled a stunt like that, he’d fire his ass.
He sat on a rock catching his breath while chastising himself and pulling his shorts on. Toni. Shit, shit, shit. He’d left her there all by herself and jumped into the river. She was probably having a panic attack. Could he be any more of an insensitive asshole? Probably not. A guy didn’t get a girl off and then jump into the damn river.
What the hell had he been thinking? Okay, he knew what he’d been thinking—he’d thought of all the shit he’d have to deal with if he lost his wallet and keys. The hours he’d have to spend in Boise replacing everything and making endless phone calls to credit card companies, equaled time he’d have to spend away from Toni. He only had seven days with her. Seven days suddenly seemed way too few.
“Toni!” He screamed her name as he ran barefoot upstream, cursing himself and every rock, stone, and branch he trod upon. By the time he got back to the spring, the river’s chill had left him and was replaced with the cold sweat of dread.
“Toni?” She was gone. So were her suit and shoes. Thank God she’d left his. His feet were raw from running over rocks to get back to her. Jumping into the river had been a spectacularly stupid move on his part, especially considering what Toni must have thought.
It didn’t take Hunter long to find her trail. He would have had a harder time following a herd of elk. She’d been running, and from the look of it, she’d fallen. Was that blood he saw on the rock? She was probably panicked because of his stupidity. Who could blame her? He called himself every name in the book as he followed her path through dense pine. When he hit the trail, he saw she’d gone the right way. Pride filled him. At least she was keeping her wits about her, though no one would blame her if she hadn’t. He picked up speed and ran flat out, all the way calling her name. When he saw the cabin, he knew she’d made it that far. The door was left wide open. He ran in. “Toni?”
He heard crying. Shit. When he stepped into the bedroom, she was searching his desk. “Toni?”
She stopped and looked at him, the leftover terror clear in her eyes. There was a flash of relief just before a swirl of emotions coalesced into what looked an awful lot like anger.
“I’m sorry, Toni. I should never have left you.”
“You’re sorry?” She hiccuped through tears. “You left me, and I thought… I thought you were dead!” She hugged herself, her fingers digging into her own arms. “I ran down the river after you. I saw your head go under, and I didn’t see it come back up. I thought you’d drowned!” She took a stuttering breath. “I pictured you trapped under the water, your head smashed against a boulder. You left me. You promised you wouldn’t. I was trying to find a phone to call 9-1-1 and have the river dragged. And I don’t even know if they have 9-1-1 here.” She threw her arms out wide. “No one told me what to do if the man you’re making out with takes a flying leap into a raging river. I thought you were dead, Hunter. Dead. You left me just like everyone else.”
Her knee was bleeding, her arms were scratched, and she was shaking. “Shhh… it’s okay.” He pulled her into his arms, and she pounded on his chest a few times before she wrapped her arms around him and cried.
“You could have been killed. Was I so awful in the spring that you risked your life to get away from me? You could have stopped or said, ‘Hey, Toni, I’m just not that into you’ or something.”
“God, no, it wasn’t you. My shorts with my keys and my ID floated into the river. I didn’t think. I just reacted. I’m sorry I scared you. I was stupid. I’m so sorry.”
“You could have been killed. Dead, like… I don’t know… dead. Were you trying to kill yourself?”
“No.” He didn’t bother telling her she was right, but he knew the river. He was a strong swimmer. He knew he’d be fine, well, mostly. He just hadn’t considered her. And that made him feel like the world’s biggest asshole. “I’m fine. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I frightened you. But I’m proud of you too. You did exactly the right thing. But it would have been nice if you weren’t quite so fast.”
“Where is your
phone?”
He walked her backward into the bathroom. “It’s in my backpack, why?”
“Where was your backpack?”
He lifted her to sit on the counter, making a space for him between her legs, and reached to get a washcloth out of the cabinet. He turned on the tap and ran the hot water. “My pack was by my shoes.”
“I ran all the way up here and left your phone by the water?”
He stopped and looked into her now bloodshot and swollen eyes. She had dirt streaked across her face. “I should have told you where the phone was. And I should never have left you like that. Can you forgive me?”
She nodded but didn’t say the words. He was a selfish bastard; he wanted to hear them.
Hunter soaped the cloth and wrung out the excess water before bending down to wash the cut on her knee. Once he was sure it was clean, he worked his way up and washed the scratches on her arms. She said nothing, though he could tell by the look on her face, there were a thousand and one things running through that quick mind of hers. He’d never experienced a quiet Toni Russo before. He much preferred it when she babbled. He finished washing her injuries, took her hand, and helped her off the counter. “Come on. Let’s get you into a warm shower.” He turned the water on and adjusted the temperature.
When he reached for the straps to her suit, she pushed him away. “I can do it myself.”
“Okay.” He knew when he was being dismissed. “I’ll be in the kitchen if you need anything.” He pulled a towel down for her and left her to it, closing the door behind him.
Hunter stepped out of the bathroom and wanted to kick himself for the hell he’d put Toni through. She’d need something to wear so he pulled a clean T-shirt from his drawer and rummaged around until he found the pair of silk boxers his sister had bought him for his birthday. He’d never worn them, never planned to, but the thought of Toni wearing them made him smile. He was just glad she wasn’t in any position to refuse. He was also thanking his lucky stars he had the rest of the night to try to make amends for the huge blunder he’d made.
Chapter 6
When Hunter was stressed, he cooked. It calmed him, and since he’d made that crack about Toni’s weight, he knew she hadn’t eaten much for lunch. Maybe a nice meal and a couple bottles of wine would help her to forgive him.
He’d bet his bottom dollar Toni was a woman who enjoyed food. He’d never known a passionate woman who didn’t, and on the passion scale, Toni was off the charts. The memory of how she looked when she came apart in his arms made his dick twitch. He took a big gulp of wine, which didn’t help the fit of his shorts any, but it made him care less about his discomfort.
While the tuna thawed, he grabbed his favorite knife and a cutting board and chopped the vegetables. Once he had them roasting, he took out a loaf of challah he’d made the day before and cut it up for a quick bread pudding. He tossed in a handful of raisins and dark chocolate chips before pouring the bread and custard mixture into a loaf pan and placing it in the water bath waiting in his second oven. Then he started the apple and port wine compote.
By the time the shower shut off, the vegetables were roasting, the compote simmering, the bread pudding baking, and he was well on his way to finishing the salad. He tossed what was left of the fennel into the salad bowl and turned the roasting vegetables—red pepper, eggplant, cherry tomatoes, onions, fennel, zucchini, and garlic. Perfect. He threw in a handful of kalamata olives and added a few sloshes of a very nice white wine—a 2009 DAOU Chemin de Fleurs Paso Robles he’d been saving for a special occasion. He couldn’t imagine a better woman to try to woo with it. He was just lucky he had two chilled bottles—the way Toni had looked when he’d left her, he wished he had ordered a case.
Hunter poured Toni a glass and refilled his own before starting on the salad dressing. Grabbing a bowl, he whisked together a nice Italian and sprinkled it with a few fennel leaves. There. It was simple meal, yet a feast for the eyes and soul, or so he hoped.
Hunter tossed the tuna steaks on a hot grill. While they seared, he turned on dinner music, wishing he knew what Toni liked to listen to. Since he was in the mood for some bluesy jazz, he clicked on his favorite playlist and set the table for two while humming along to Corinne Bailey Rae.
Hunter felt Toni’s presence before he heard her. She stood in the living room wearing the clothes he’d set out and looked uncertain. “Feeling better?”
“Yeah, thanks for the clothes.”
“You’re welcome.” He’d decided against candles, because it was still bright out. In the past, he’d always appreciated the long summer days when it stayed light past ten in the evening. For now, he’d have to just imagine her washed in flickering candlelight with his T-shirt slipping over her bare shoulder. She’d tied the T-shirt at the waist, probably because it would look like a dress if she hadn’t. The effect was anything but functional.
Her wet hair hung straight, her lips were bright pink, probably from biting them, although it could be from the sun. He wanted to kiss her, but then he remembered the steaks. He ran back to the kitchen to turn them, hoping they weren’t overdone. “I poured wine.”
Toni watched him move toward her and hugged herself before he got too close.
“Are you cold?”
She shook her head and took the wineglass he offered.
“I hope you like tuna. While you showered I threw dinner together.”
He went back to the kitchen and pulled out the vegetables. He plated them, took the tuna steaks off the grill, and sliced and arranged them on each plate.
A silent Toni was unnerving. She eyed him like she would a hairy spider.
“The salad’s in the refrigerator if you want to grab it.”
She did, but he couldn’t help but notice she was sure to keep her distance. Great. He took another swig of wine and whisked the dressing a few more times before pouring it over the salad. “The salad tongs are in the drawer directly in front of you.”
“I didn’t expect you to cook.” Toni found the tongs, tossed the salad, and then brought it to the table.
So she does speak. He picked up the plates and set them on the table before taking a chance and wrapping his arms around her, pulling her close. “I really am sorry.”
She looked at him with guileless eyes. He liked that about her. When Toni looked him in the eye, Hunter saw the truth. If she didn’t want to talk about something, she told him point-blank. There was no beating around the bush, no lies he could see, and he saw more lies than anyone, but maybe Trapper.
He realized a little too late he couldn’t stop at holding her. No, he pretty much had to kiss her. She tasted like the wine she’d just sipped, cool and tart. He took it as a challenge, but then everything with Toni had been somewhat challenging. “So, are you going to forgive me?”
“It’s not that big a deal.”
“Yes it is. It was a major screwup, and it was all my fault. I didn’t think about you. I’m not used to having anyone…” he stumbled. What the hell was he supposed to say? He wasn’t used to having anyone who cared about him? That was kind of presumptuous. Anyone to care about… which, when he thought about it, fit the bill. But she didn’t look at all ready to hear that. He couldn’t say he wasn’t used to anyone counting on him. That wasn’t true. Everyone he guided counted on him, just not the way he hoped Toni would. Damn. “I promise not to let you down again.”
He kissed the skeptical look right off her face, and this time she kissed him back. Oh, she was still mad, but as long she took it out on him with kisses, he could definitely get behind that.
He slid his hand under the back of her T-shirt, traced her spine, learned every bump and curve of her, and loved the feel of her body against his. She ended the kiss before he was ready, but since dinner was cooling, it was probably for the best.
Her cheeks were pink, her eyes dark and bri
ght, and her lips swollen. She stole his breath.
He held her chair only to be met by a look of surprise. She surveyed the meal, and her eyes widened. “I can’t believe you did all this.” She sat, and he took his seat, scooting a little closer to her.
“Why? I cook every night I’m home. It’s about an hour and a half to Ketchum and the closest restaurant.” He reached over to serve her salad.
“If it were up to me, I’d starve.”
“No, you wouldn’t. You’d learn to cook after a month of eating frozen dinners.”
She gave him another incredulous look.
“What?”
She placed her napkin in her lap. “How do you know so much about me?”
He sipped his wine and thought about it. “I spent the entire day watching and listening to you. I think it would take a lifetime to figure you out, but I have to hand it to you, you fascinate me. I want to know everything about you, and since you’re tight-lipped about certain things, I find it necessary to make deductions. It’s good to know I’m right.”
Toni almost choked. She fascinated him? “What is this, figure out the weird girl?” Suddenly it didn’t feel like the compliment it had a second ago.
Anger flashed in Hunter’s eyes. “I don’t think you’re weird. I think you’re beautiful, passionate, and smart. Fascinating. I say what I mean, Toni. I don’t give backhanded compliments. Why is it that’s all you hear?”
“I don’t know.” She’d never thought about it. She’d also never confronted anyone like she had Hunter. She wasn’t sure what it was about him that made her blurt out the first thing that came to mind. She had no filter where he was concerned. “I’m sorry.”
He shot her the same look she’d seen when she told him she wasn’t interested, and at the time, she really hadn’t thought she had been. Sometime through the day that had changed; now she just wished she wasn’t interested.
Hunter was a complication she didn’t need, but one she didn’t want to give up either. When she’d thought he was dead, she’d been upset—like anyone would be, but it went deeper than that. She felt a profound sense of loss of something beautiful, something she might never find again. And that something covered a lot more feeling than a few kisses and a mind-blowing orgasm should instill. She’d known him only hours, but that wasn’t the way it felt.
