Mac always felt he shouldn’t have to tell her because she should know that she and the girls meant everything to him. He didn’t take any chances with his life because of them. His goal for every covert operation was to come home alive and in one piece to Teri and the girls. He loved being a husband and father.
Returning to the living room, he took the seat across from her. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to see that she was nervous. Why?
“So what is it, Teri? What big-ticket item did you buy while I was gone that was over-the-top enough to send you here?”
He could tell by the surprised look on her face that he’d been right. She had bought something and whatever it was, she knew it would be something he wouldn’t like. Last year it had been a new bedroom set when they’d given Tia their old one. That didn’t bother him as much as the price she’d paid for it. As far as he was concerned, a bed that cost that much should have the ability to sing them to sleep. They didn’t have to worry about making ends meet, but it was the principle!
“That’s not the reason I came here, Mac.”
He nodded. “Okay, then, what’s the reason?”
For a long moment, she didn’t say anything and he watched her intently. When he saw the first sign of the tears that appeared in her eyes, he was out of his chair in a flash. He went over to the sofa and pulled her into his arms. His wife wasn’t a crier unless she was truly upset about something.
“What is it, Teri? What’s wrong?”
She looked up at him and took a deep breath, as if trying to find the courage to tell him whatever she had to say. He tensed, not knowing what would come next, and hoped he was prepared for whatever it was.
“We agreed that we wouldn’t have any more children, and I was to have that surgery.”
He watched her closely. “Yes, we did agree to that. I wanted to be here with you for the surgery, but then I got that call from my commanding officer to leave immediately. You said you would have the surgery as scheduled and get the folks to come help out with the kids.”
Mac watched her features and had an idea where this conversation was headed. “Are you trying to tell me that you didn’t have the surgery after all, Teri?” He’d known that although they’d agreed the surgery was necessary, having another child would not have bothered her in the least.
“I couldn’t.”
He stared at her. “What do you mean you couldn’t? We agreed that you would.”
“I know, but—”
“Let me guess,” he interrupted to say. “You changed your mind about having it done, right? It wouldn’t be the first time you reneged on something we agreed to do, Teri. You had no right to take it upon yourself to do that. That was a decision we’d made together.”
She pushed out of his arms, her features furious. “Damn you, Mac, don’t you think I know what we agreed to do. I was going to have the procedure done, but like I said, I couldn’t,” she said, almost screaming at him, clearly getting emotional.
“Why?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Because when I had my presurgical workup done, the doctor discovered I was pregnant.”
Mac’s head began spinning. He dropped his arms to his side. “Pregnant?”
“Yes, pregnant! Although a baby was something we hadn’t planned, I figured you would want him.”
“Him?”
“Yes, him. I carried our son for four months and then I lost him. I lost my baby. Our baby.” She then rushed from the house.
He stood there in shock. Teri had been pregnant? She’d gotten as far as four months and then miscarried? Their son? Oh, my God, what had happened? Snapping out of his shock, he quickly went to the door after her. He opened it in time to see Teri galloping off on that horse.
* * *
Teri kept riding, refusing to look back when Mac called after her and rebuffing the idea of going back to finish her conversation with him. At the moment she needed to get as far away as she could in order to pull herself together. Then she would go back. But not now.
She needed to be alone.
She knew Mac and truly believed that although they hadn’t planned for a baby, he would have wanted their son. It would not have mattered if it had been a boy or girl. Mac would have wanted their baby. He loved kids. They both did. They had wanted three but had decided to try a fourth time for a boy. When it turned out to be a girl, they’d decided to have no more tries and had agreed four was enough.
Teri knew the only reason Mac had gone off like he had just now was because they were still at odds with each other. He believed she would defy him at every turn, and unfortunately, over the years, she had given him reason to think so. She never did anything deliberately, but it always seemed that way to him.
What he had to understand and what she’d tried explaining to him countless times was that when he was gone, she became the head of the household. That meant she had to make decisions without him. He claimed he didn’t have a problem with that, yet he never agreed with any of the choices she made.
He would return home and begin questioning her decisions. On top of that he tried to control everything, as if he could just reappear after being gone for months and disrupt their lives. While he was gone, everything ran like a finely tuned machine. When he returned, that machine would break down. He would be so glad to see the girls that he would let them get away with murder. Then when he left it was up to her to implement martial law all over again and become what the girls thought of as the mean parent. She was sick and tired of him questioning what she did and why she did it. She wanted a marriage where she felt any decision she made wouldn’t be questioned and ridiculed.
She slowed Amsterdam down to a trot and noticed she was in a different area from where she’d ridden before. Ahead she saw a large windmill and remembered that when they’d come here for their honeymoon this had been a coal miners’ camp. Several mines were in the area and were now deserted, their openings boarded up.
Teri had been a history major in college and recalled that years ago several settlements in Wyoming had been considered mining towns. Even now Wyoming was the largest producer of coal in the country. She wondered when these particular mines had shut down since she recalled them being in operation when she’d been here on her honeymoon.
She nudged Amsterdam toward an area where she’d seen a huge lake the first day she’d ridden out this far. That particular area had reminded her of a section of her grandparents’ property, which was now legally hers again. She wished she could be happy about that but knew she couldn’t until she told Mac what she’d done.
It didn’t take her long to reach the lake. Getting off Amsterdam, she tied him to a tree and decided to walk around awhile to calm her nerves before heading back. Before knowing all the facts, Mac had reacted pretty angrily to her not having that procedure done. If his reaction was an example of his mood, she wasn’t in any hurry to tell him about her ranch. But she would tell him. It was best to tell him everything, let him get mad and then get over it.
And he would get over it, eventually.
She just hated this pattern they had to go through whenever he returned home. Should they seek marriage counseling again? She knew that was out of the question since he’d hated it the last time. Still, Teri couldn’t discount the potential of another issue being added to the mix. Like she’d told him, she hadn’t gotten that surgical procedure done. What she hadn’t told him was that she hadn’t been taking any type of birth control since. His arrival had been unexpected and when they’d made love, he hadn’t used protection. What if she was pregnant again? Had he considered that possibility yet? Would he understand why she still hadn’t gotten the procedure done three months later?
No, he wouldn’t understand.
The more she thought about it, the more she felt she still needed time to herself. She’d told him what had happened with the baby and for now
that was enough. At a later time she would go more into details, but for now she needed her time here to deal with things without him. The best way to handle Mac was to ask him to leave.
She wasn’t sure how long she’d walked around the lake, deep in her thoughts, when suddenly she heard the sound of a horse approaching. When she glanced around, she saw it was Mac. He was racing his horse toward her. Unsurprisingly, he had a fierce frown on his face.
He barely brought the horse to a stop and was off the animal’s back, looking every bit the cowboy in his jeans, Western shirt, boots and the Stetson on his head. Her husband was a gorgeous man, regardless of whether he was wearing navy attire or dressed as he was now. She could see him riding the range of the forty-acre ranch they now owned.
A ranch she had yet to tell him about.
He rushed over to her. “Why did you leave like that, Teri?”
She lifted her chin. “Honestly? What else was I to say, Mac?”
He reached out and pulled her into his arms. “I’m sorry, baby,” he murmured brokenly. “I’m sorry you went through that alone. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. And I would have wanted our baby, please know that.”
She fought back tears when she lifted her head to look up at him. “I know that, Mac. I never doubted that you would. But what hurts more than anything is that I lost the son we wanted.” And then she buried her face in his chest and sobbed.
* * *
Mac held his wife while she cried. The sound nearly broke his heart. He felt like an ass for saying what he had earlier without knowing all the facts. And now that he did know, he hurt right along with her.
He’d always wanted a big family and so had Teri. Using sound judgment, they’d decided to stop at four. It was hard enough for Teri to handle everything alone when he was gone on his missions, without adding another child to their family. But that hadn’t meant they would not have welcomed a fifth. She was a wonderful mother to his kids. He knew that. He also knew that after having four girls they’d entertained the idea of trying again for a son but had decided not to. There was no guarantee their fifth child would be a boy.
But it had been.
He gently stroked her back, wondering what had caused the miscarriage. He was about to ask when she pushed herself out of his arms. “I need time alone, Mac. Please leave.”
He shook his head. “There’s no way I’m going back to the cabin and leave you out here.”
“No, I don’t want you to do that. I want you to leave and go back to Virginia. I’ll be home in a few days and we’ll talk some more then.”
Mac knew he had to be looking at her like she’d lost her mind. “I’m not going anywhere and leaving you here, Teri. Whatever happens in our marriage we’re in this together. We—”
“No, Mac. With you it’s never really ‘we.’ Not really. It’s what you want and what you think, and like the good wife, I fall in line. But you know what, Mac? I didn’t know how much I wanted another baby until I found out I was pregnant. Then I wanted it with everything within me. I didn’t care about how difficult it would be, or how you and I can’t seem to agree, because I knew we would make it work.”
“Teri—”
“No, you always want me to do what you want, Mac. You never ask what I want. Like how I want to work.”
“That’s not fair. You knew how I felt about things before we married. Is it wrong for a man to want to take care of what’s his?” he asked, not liking the way their conversation was going.
“Only when you start taking our marriage for granted.”
He didn’t say anything for a minute and then he asked her, “And you honestly think I’ve done that?”
“All I know is that I woke up yesterday morning feeling sad and depressed, and a part of me wished you were here with me.”
“I am here with you now, Teri. I want to spend the rest of the week here with you. We can consider it a second honeymoon. We can—”
“No, I don’t need a second honeymoon, Mac. I need a marriage with a husband who won’t question everything I do when he returns home. If you stay here, we will only argue...especially when I tell you about the other thing.”
Mac lifted a brow. Did that mean there was more? “What other thing?”
She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about it now. I need time alone, Mac. Please go home and stay with the girls until I return. When I get back on Sunday, I’ll tell you everything.”
“I am not leaving.”
At that moment the sound of the horses caught their attention. Both animals were fidgeting, acting anxious and prancing about as if they were trying to get away.
“I wonder what’s wrong with them,” she said.
“I don’t know,” he replied, and they moved toward the animals to find out for themselves.
Mac glanced around. Had they picked up the scent of a wolf, coyote or some other wild animal? The closer he and Teri got to the horses, the more agitated the animals seemed to get.
“Oh, my God, Mac. Look!”
The frantic sound of Teri’s voice had him looking over at her. She was pointing toward the sky. He saw it. Damn.
In the distance was a gigantic tornado. It had already touched down and was swirling right in their direction.
Five
“We need to get the hell out of here!” Mac said, pulling Teri toward the horses.
“And go where? We’re not going to be able to outrun that, Mac.”
“I know. I recall passing several abandoned mineshafts coming here,” he said, untying her horse and handing her the reins.
“But we’ll be headed toward the twister,” Teri said, climbing on Amsterdam’s back.
“We have no choice. If we stay here, we’ll be out in the open. Our chances would be better trying to get to a mine before that damn tornado does. That means we’ll need to ride like hell to get there.”
Teri had no problem doing that and knew Mac didn’t, either. “Then let’s go.”
She took off and Mac kept up with her. They had to tighten their hold on the reins to control the horses. Animals had an instinct to avoid danger and they were forcing their steeds head-on toward it.
“It’s okay, boy.” She leaned in to whisper to Amsterdam. “It’s okay.”
As if the horse believed her, he picked up speed. And even through the sense of impending doom, Teri couldn’t help smiling. From the moment Amsterdam had been selected as the horse for her during her stay, she believed they had bonded.
She glanced over at Mac and knew he had gone into SEAL mode, intent on keeping them alive, regardless of the danger. She doubted he’d talked to his horse, yet the animal seemed to accept the man on his back was master and wherever he led the horse had to go, regardless of whether he wanted to or not.
“We’re almost there. I can see the windmill,” Mac shouted over to her. She nodded against the wind that had picked up and she refused to look toward the sky. She just refused to do so.
They reached the area and quickly got off the horses. While Teri removed the saddlebags from the animals’ backs, Mac grabbed a huge, thick limb off the ground and used it to knock some of the boards from one of the mineshaft openings. She released the horses, knowing their instinct for survival would have them running away to find refuge from the storm.
After the horses raced off, Teri rushed over to Mac. “Why did you decide on this particular mineshaft?” she asked him as she began helping to move the boards aside.
“The wider opening will afford more air to circulate. It also looks sturdier than the others and the ground around here is damp. That means there’s water somewhere in this shaft.”
Teri glanced down at the ground. She hadn’t noticed that. At that moment she looked up to see several limbs from a huge tree blown down near their feet.
“Get in. I’ll take the saddlebags.”
“I’ll help.”
Mac looked at her, opened his mouth as if he was about to protest but then changed his mind, and said, “Come on. We need to hurry.”
Teri had never been in a mineshaft before and glanced around. The area inside was dark. She could barely see in front of her. When suddenly a light appeared, she saw it was the flashlight from Mac’s cell phone. It shone brighter than the one on hers.
“We need to get as far away from the opening as possible.”
Heeding Mac’s advice, she followed him deeper and deeper into the mineshaft, recalling horror stories of miners who got trapped underground and died for lack of air. “Let’s place the saddles here,” he said, placing his on the ground, and she followed, placing hers there.
They walked farther into the mineshaft when suddenly the ground beneath their feet began to shake. At the same time sediment began falling from the ceiling. Mac grabbed for her and she clutched him tight while he covered her body with his. Teri knew without being told that the twister was practically above them.
Although they were midway in the mineshaft, they could see debris flying around outside the mine’s wide opening. They actually saw a tree, the same one she’d been standing under earlier, ripped from its roots to tumble down to the ground. Appliances, from no telling where, had gotten caught up in the twister and were tossed effortlessly to the ground.
Mac tried to press her face into his chest so she wouldn’t see the devastation happening around them, but she looked anyway. Suddenly, the opening was covered in tree limbs, boards and other flying debris. She glanced up at Mac, and he didn’t have to tell her they were trapped inside.
As if he sensed her thoughts, he leaned in close and said, “We’ll be fine, Teri. Once it passes, we’ll get out of here.” She wanted to believe him. She had to believe him. They had four little ones at home who needed them.
His To Claim (The Westmoreland Legacy Book 4) Page 5
