by I Beacham
Joey kissed her. Sam’s face turned soft, and some of the worry she wore disappeared.
“Thank you, Sam, for giving me space. I do appreciate it and I know you’re concerned, but I think the walk has done me good. It’s been therapeutic.” Joey rested her head on Sam’s shoulder.
“Since I came back from Balshir, I haven’t found any peace. There’s been this whole agitated mess inside me that never stops moving. It’s like being on some caffeine high without the caffeine. Seeing Abu has been a shock, more so hearing what he said, but it’s made me feel different. Something inside me has stopped. Sure, the horror of what happened is still there and that will haunt me to the end of my days. It was vile…traumatic. But I feel like a weight has lifted.”
Sam just listened and Joey continued.
“I understand the missing part of the puzzle. I always wondered why Mo left the rooms just before the missile hit. It never felt right. I know I thought a lot about that when I was in hiding, but I never connected the dots because I had no reason to. He went to get water despite the fact we had enough until the following morning when we were going to leave anyway. Now it makes sense. It wasn’t because we’d upset him. He knew what was going to happen.
“If Mo hadn’t done what he did, if he hadn’t told the insurgents we’d be there, maybe we’d all be alive today. Kurt, Mitch…they’d still be around. We’d have gotten our stories and we’d be looking for the next one. And I was always the planner. I used to drive the guys crazy. They thought I went in for overkill, but it was always attention to detail with me. I’d plan everything down to the last chocolate bar. But for Mo, we might have made it out.” She looked at Sam. “Of course, I’d never have met you.”
“Can you forgive Mo? Truthfully?” Sam asked.
“I don’t know. I expect some days I will and other days I won’t, but I’ll try. He was a good man, and he had no choice.”
“How does all this make you feel?” Sam asked.
“Better.”
Sam tightened her arm around her.
“How does it make you feel?” Joey asked Sam.
“Anything that makes you better makes me feel better too.”
“You’ve been worried,” Joey said.
“Only because Abu took you back to a place I long for you to leave.”
“But it’s helped. I really do feel…lighter. Abu gave me a gift today.” At that precise moment, her stomach made a rumbling sound.
“Strange,” Sam said. “Mine made that same noise just before you came back.”
“So, Sam, my wonderful rock…I feel better. I also feel hungry. We haven’t eaten since breakfast. There’s a burger joint around the corner. How about something unhealthy?”
“Dear Lord, yes. My stomach thinks my throat’s been cut.”
They moved off the sofa. Joey reached out and held Sam’s face in her hands.
“Thank you for being there with me today. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for coming over here to find me. And thank you for loving me without reservation even when I tried to push you away. I don’t know what I’d do without you in my life. You are my everything. I want you to know that.”
Sam turned to kiss Joey’s hand. “Thank you for loving me. You’ve saved me.”
“We’ve saved each other.” As Joey stood there, she didn’t think it was possible to love anyone more than she loved Sam. She had fallen in love with her so easily, and despite the complications that had followed, she couldn’t imagine life without her. “I’m in love with a vicar,” she whispered.
“A jobless one.” Sam grinned.
“You need to talk to Neil and see what’s happening.”
“Tomorrow. Now can we please go and eat?”
Sam dragged Joey out of the apartment in search of food.
It didn’t matter to Sam that she ordered—and ate—the biggest burger, covering it with everything you weren’t supposed to if you wanted to avoid a heart attack. Never had a burger tasted so good. It occurred to her as she ate that everything was going right. Her prayers had been answered. She was eating. She was in love and she was loved in return. Joey was opening up. Sam thought life couldn’t get much better.
But it did the next morning when they arose.
“It’s early,” Sam bellyached. She just wanted to stay in bed, but Joey was up with the larks.
“Come on, we’ve got loads to do.”
“We?” Sam didn’t think there was anything on her agenda. She was unemployed.
“You need to talk to Bishop Neil and see what’s going on, and—”
“What do you mean, going on?”
“You said yourself, you’ve had no confirmation of your resignation, and you haven’t been asked to vacate the vicarage yet. Talk to Neil and find out what’s going on.”
Sam sighed. Joey was right. “Fine.”
“I also need you to do me a favor. Can you find me a good counselor in the UK, one who specializes in my sort of trauma?”
Sam couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Thank you, God.
“I’m ready to talk. I have PTSD, and I don’t want it. I’m not going to let Balshir dictate the rest of my life. It’s time to let the professionals give me a hand.” Joey looked down at Sam. “Now get up.”
Sam was already pushing the covers back. “Your parents are going to be so happy.”
“I know.”
“I’ll talk to Neil. He’s worked with the military over the years. I’m sure he has good contacts. I’ll drop him an email.”
“You should call him.”
“Too early. England still sleeps.”
“Then call him later. In the meantime, you can help me figure out what stuff I have to put into storage and what we want shipped to the UK. Get dressed,Vicar. We have a busy day ahead.
*
“I’ve lost it,” Neil told Sam over the phone.
“How can you have lost it? I sent it to you in an email.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. It was an attachment.”
“Ah,” Neil said. “That’s it then. Letters of resignation have to be hard copy.”
“Why haven’t you chased me for it?”
“No time. I’m starting the new job, and Miriam has been boxing everything at the house that isn’t sentient.”
Sam sensed Neil wasn’t being entirely truthful. She always knew when he was being evasive. She hoped he wasn’t planning on cajoling her back to be vicar of St. Mary’s. That option was untenable now.
“How are you explaining my absence then?” Sam asked.
“You’re taking all your accumulated leave and on a short sabbatical.”
“And no one is asking why?” Sam smelled more than a rat now. The rodents were breeding.
“They ask.”
“And?”
“I’m evasive,” Neil answered. Sam could almost hear him grin.
“You’re not expecting me to come back to St. Mary’s, Neil.”
“Be calm, Sam. Of course not. There’s a new vicar who’ll be taking over shortly. He’s an older man who has left his career as a successful prison psychologist to enter the church.”
“He’ll fit right in.” Sam’s dry response earned a chuckle from Neil.
“You’ll like him…The Reverend George Hale. He’s coming to us from Stratford. He’s had a very successful first parish there but wants to be closer to the children’s schools. He’s got a bigger family than I have…seven children.”
“Seven?”
“Several adopted. Good man.”
“You’ll want me out of the vicarage soon then.”
“Yes, but not because of George. The place is too small so the diocese is making alternative arrangements. The church is looking to cut costs so they plan to sell the current vicarage. It’s too small and needs modernizing. They consider it no longer fit for purpose and too expensive to bring up to a decent living standard.”
“Thanks. You’ve had me living in a hovel all these years.”
“Where will the new one be?”
“They’re thinking the other side of Kidderminster.”
It was a considerable distance from the old vicarage. Sam thought of Gloria. She wouldn’t be able to continue as housekeeper if they did that.
“When will you be coming back?” Neil asked.
Sam had told Neil that she and Joey were now an item. She had also apprised him of Joey’s new job and decision to move permanently to England.
“Imminently,” Sam said. “We’re just waiting for Joey’s mother to have her operation and make sure she’s okay. Then we’ll be on the first flight back.”
“Good. I need to see you as soon as possible.”
“Any particular reason?”
“Do I have to have a reason to see a dear friend? Miriam is missing you too.”
“Why do I think you’re up to something?”
“I have no idea, Sam. However I do have a proposal for you.”
“A proposal.”
“Yes. Something I’m working on.”
“With regards to what?”
“Just come and see me as soon as you get back. I’ll drop you an email if I hear of any date you have to vacate the vicarage.”
Sam knew she’d get nothing more out of Neil. When their phone chat finished, it didn’t stop her from wondering what he was up to.
She suspected he wanted to offer her another church position. But Sam was adamant that she didn’t want to be a vicar anymore with all the demands that entailed. She wanted to have more time for Joey. Neither did she want to be a vicar for a small country church. While she wanted more personal time, she also wanted a job that would challenge her. Sam hoped Neil wasn’t rethinking the idea of offering her a position on his team at Lambeth Palace. She didn’t want to be in London and commuting home to Worcestershire. She and Joey would start house hunting as soon as they returned, and they wanted somewhere around the area they were already living. Joey was also fond of Auntie Elsa—despite her inability to keep confidences. She knew she was growing old and wanted to be around.
Sam put her anxiety on hold and glanced at her watch. Joey wouldn’t be home yet. She was with the Realtor who was letting her townhouse.
At a loss for something to do, Sam contemplated going for a bike ride but decided to check her emails. She was surprised to find one from the producer of Forgotten Worcestershire. It appeared her earlier sortie into the households of WM radio listeners had proved popular and she was being invited to do more, possibly a series of six. Would she like to contact them?
Sam replied immediately. It was something she’d enjoyed doing, and the chance to do more and this time be paid wasn’t something she would pass up. It seemed her day was turning into a series of possibilities.
She waited for Joey to return so she could tell her the news.
Chapter Twenty-one
Their return to England came at the right time.
The American tabloid press had started showing interest in Joey. Photos of her leaving NPR and speculation she might be considering working for them abounded. Sherry Dexter had done nothing to kill that rumor. She loved toying with the types of media that fabricated stories based on lies and innuendo to boost their circulation or Web hits. Some of the rock-bottom press was already discussing why RSB had canceled Joey’s contract. They would voice their sympathy for her, but there was always an edge of unpleasantness to their articles. One even went as far as stating RSB had let Joey go because she was having a lesbian relationship with one of the married station producers. There was never any truth to these articles. Joey always seemed to take it in her stride, but Sam and her father didn’t.
As soon as Ann had undergone angioplasty and the operation was declared successful, Joey and Sam flew back to England.
The first thing Sam did was put the house her parents had left her up for sale. The second thing on her list was to go and see Neil at home.
“I hope you don’t mind, but I’ve booked you a job interview,” Neil said.
Sam stared at him. He habitually surprised her, but this was surpassing his usual method of attack. Based on their last chat, Sam was sure he was going to ask her to reconsider her resignation as vicar. She still wasn’t sure he wouldn’t.
He was sitting in what was left of his home office. It was currently nothing more than organized crates with a desk and a few chairs in the middle of the room. Neil had already started working in London, but the family had yet to move and join him.
Sam leaned back in one of the armchairs the movers hadn’t yet taken and placed her mug of coffee on a package box.
“You did say you’re still looking for gainful employment,” he added.
“Am I allowed to ask for what?” Sam loved mysteries, but this was a curious one. She watched Neil lean forward and pick up a sheet of paper. He started to read from it verbatim.
“The Worcestershire Tudor Rose Historic Churches Trust. It supports appeals from churches for building and restoration projects, the repairs of church fabrics, church communities initiatives, religious charities, other charities that preserve the UK heritage, etcetera, etcetera.” He stopped reading and looked at her. “The trust office is in Worcester, and they’re looking for an ordained minister to replace the Reverend Dominic Bell who will be retiring at the end of the year.”
“I know Dominic. I approached the trust for a grant for St. Mary’s,” Sam said.
“I know. Dominic was very impressed with your application, which is why you were successful. He’s also been very impressed with you. He likes how you think outside the box and how you’ve used the media to push fundraising.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“I’ve always found him a bit dry and humorless. I didn’t think he was too keen on me.”
Neil chuckled. “He’s not an easy man to read. I agree he lacks a certain charm and possesses the warmth of a taxman, but his heart is in the right place. He just doesn’t hand over money lightly. As he says, it’s hard to come by and shouldn’t be squandered frivolously. I think he sees the trust funds as his own money and doesn’t like to part with it without good reason. You should be honored that St. Mary’s got that grant.”
Neil placed the sheet of paper down. His face was more serious.
“When I mentioned to Dominic that you were looking to go ‘field agent’ he actually asked if you would be interested in applying for his post. Whoever gets the job they would start fairly soon and work alongside him to pick up the reins when he leaves. I thought this would be right up your aisle. And of course with your treasurer experience…”
“Is that your attempt at dry humor?” Sam had many butterflies about leaving the church, but the post of treasurer wasn’t one of them.
“Is it working?” Neil grinned.
“No.”
“But are you interested in the job?”
“Yes.”
“There’s a small team on the trust and the usual amount of requisite paid professionals so I don’t think you’d be revisiting your treasurer skills. The job would give you enormous flexibility, Sam. Dominic says he drives his own schedule. He spends as much time as he wants in the office, balancing it with the need to get out and view applications. It’s a people job, and you’d be meeting the applicants face-to-face.” Neil let the proposal sink in. “What do you think?”
Sam couldn’t hide her excitement. “I think I’m very interested.”
“Thank the Lord.” Neil looked relieved. “I told you God would find you something.”
“I haven’t got the job yet.”
“They want an ordained minister. You fit. They want someone with restoration experience. You fit. They want someone who understands fundraising and who can think outside the box. You fit.”
“Oh, Neil…” Sam couldn’t believe it. This morning she’d woken up fairly jobless and with just a short radio series on the list. Now she had real prospects.
> “Well, I’m glad that’s sorted. What are you doing tomorrow morning?” Neil asked.
“Er…”
“Excellent. I’ve got you an appointment with Dominic at the trust office in Worcester tomorrow morning just to make sure the job lights your fire. He’s keen to tell you about it, and you can both talk through all the detail. Then you can fill this in.”
Neil handed her the job application. “The formal interview is next Friday.”
It was all so quick it left Sam speechless. When she overcame her shock, she asked, “Is there anything you haven’t done?”
“We still haven’t found St. Mary’s a treasurer, but…” He gave a reluctant smile. “That’s no longer your problem, Sam. It’s not mine either now. My replacement, Bishop John Clement, will have that challenge.”
“Neil, I was blessed the day you and I became friends. I know I haven’t got the job yet—I may not—but thank you for all of this. I admit this morning I felt the first surges of panic that I don’t have full-time employment, or any irons in the fire that might provide some. I told Joey she might have attached herself to an over-the-hill ordained minister with no job prospects, and that she might be the sole breadwinner.”
“What did she say?”
Sam smiled. “She told me to stop whining and that something would come along.”
“And it has.”
“Yes, thanks to you.”
When Sam got back to the vicarage, she was over the moon to find Joey there.
Officially, Joey wasn’t staying at the vicarage. They both agreed that it didn’t look good to have a vicar living in sin at the place. They would play it tactfully until they found a home of their own. Then they could sin all they wanted. Joey had moved back in with Auntie Elsa. However, the self-imposed rules did get bent on occasion, and Joey stayed over at the vicarage more times than she didn’t.
Sam swept into the kitchen and gave Joey a huge hug.
“I’ve missed you, and I’ve been thinking of you all day. How has the first session gone? Am I allowed to ask?” Sam pulled back to study her. Joey’s first counseling session had been today. Sam was praying it went okay. She knew Joey wouldn’t chuck it all in again like she had before, but it didn’t stop her from worrying.
