He led the horse as they strolled down the lane, past the fields where men were working in the distance. Catalina took off her bonnet and let the sun wash over her.
‘Does all this belong to Castonbury?’ she asked, gesturing to the fields and the woods beyond.
‘Yes,’ Jamie said. ‘And more just past that way that has been fallow for a long time. I have been consulting with many of the other farmers in the neighbourhood to see what best use they can be put to. There has been too much waste at Castonbury.’
‘So you are turning farmer?’ Catalina said with a teasing smile. ‘I could not have envisioned it.’
Jamie laughed. ‘I would not have thought it myself in my soldiering days. But I must do my best for Castonbury. Phaedra and her husband have made a good beginning with the stables here now. I can do my part with the farm and the tenants.’
‘You were a formidable leader in Spain, Jamie,’ she said. ‘Your home will surely prosper with you here now.’
‘Even if I know nothing about sheep or cows or crop rotations?’
‘You will learn,’ she said.
‘I am trying. Once Webster is out of the way...’
‘Which he will be very soon!’
‘Then I can really turn my attention to the estate. But the house needs a mistress. It has not really had one since my mother died.’
A proper mistress for Castonbury—a proper duchess. Yes, that would be the crown of Jamie’s homecoming, Catalina was sure of it. She looked out over the fields and imagined it as hers, as theirs. It would be a dream to build such a life here.
But she loved Jamie, and she couldn’t be selfish, grasping on to what she wanted with no thought to what would be best for him. She would not let the past they shared tie him down now.
She smiled up at him. ‘We should be getting back. They’ll be returning from the picnic soon, and Lydia will be rushing to tell me all about it.’
Jamie raised his brow, and Catalina could tell he saw through her quick change of subject. But he let the topic of a duchess for Castonbury drop. ‘Your charge is a charming young lady. You seem very fond of her.’
‘I am. It has been a pleasure to spend time with her.’
‘She appears to have an admirer in Mr Hale.’
‘Yes. I am not sure I should encourage their attachment,’ Catalina said.
‘My sister says Mr Hale is considered quite eligible in the neighbourhood. All the young ladies wear their finest bonnets to Sunday services now, I hear.’
Catalina laughed. ‘Her guardian did hope for a, shall we say, grander match. But I think a country vicarage would suit Miss Westman very well.’
‘What if I were to put in a good word for Mr Hale with her guardian?’
When Jamie himself was meant to be the ‘grander match’? Catalina wasn’t sure it would help, but any ally she could find for Lydia would be welcome. ‘That would be very kind of you, Jamie. Thank you.’
‘I want to help you in any way I can, Catalina,’ he said quietly. ‘If you will only let me.’
Catalina wasn’t sure what to say. Her heart was pounding at his words. She nodded silently, and they continued on with their walk in silence through the lovely summer day.
* * *
Jamie studied the way the sun shone on Catalina’s hair, turning it to a gleaming ebony. She turned her face up to its warmth and smiled, and for a moment she looked so very happy.
He suddenly had the urgent desire to make her feel like that every day. To make all her moments happy and free of any care or trouble. Because all of the happiest moments in his life had been spent with her.
When he thought she was dead, everything had gone grey and blank. It had been one of the reasons he took on the secret task in Spain; without her he hadn’t cared about anything. Perhaps he had even hoped he might truly die. But then he saw her again, here at Castonbury, and all seemed right again.
As he watched her smile up at the sun, it hit him like an explosion—Catalina was his wife. She had been since that day in Spain, and she always would be even if she pushed him away. He didn’t know what her real reasons were for running from him now, but he would find them out and overcome them all. He would find a way to make her stay.
Because he suddenly realised he could not go on without her. That he loved her, and she was his true wife. She always had been, and he wanted her always to be so....
Chapter Sixteen
‘It is very kind of you to give me a ride into Buxton again, Lady Phaedra,’ Catalina said as the carriage bounced down the road out of Castonbury. She had got up very early that morning, knowing that Phaedra was going on another horse-bound errand. She had to talk to Alicia again, alone this time.
‘Not at all,’ Phaedra answered. ‘I am glad of the company, Mrs Moreno, especially since Lily is taking Miss Westman to visit her grandmother, Mrs Lovell, today. Though I am rather surprised you had an errand into town again so soon.’
‘I have a friend there I must call on,’ Catalina said.
‘Indeed? A friend?’ Phaedra arched her brow, and for an instant she looked so very much like Jamie in his sceptical moments. ‘You know, Mrs Moreno, you are most intriguing.’
Catalina laughed in surprise. ‘Intriguing? Me? No, I assure you, I am very dull.’
‘Just the chaperone who keeps to the background?’ Phaedra shook her head. ‘I don’t think so. I think there is much more to you than that.’
‘There is not,’ Catalina said, wishing the Montagues were not so very observant. She wanted to be in the background. She wanted not to leave any mark on Castonbury.
‘Everyone thinks I see only my horses, but that is not true,’ Phaedra said. ‘And I know my brother Jamie finds you intriguing as well.’
‘Now that cannot be true,’ Catalina protested.
‘Why ever not? You are very pretty. Why should he not watch you?’ Phaedra turned her head to stare silently out of the window for a moment. When she spoke again, it was almost wistful. ‘I fear Jamie was a lonely man, even before he left for Spain. Being the heir, having so many expectations on one’s shoulders, will do that, I suppose. But since he came home—I don’t know. He seems in such pain. None of us can really reach him.’
She suddenly turned back to Catalina, her eyes solemn and direct. ‘But when he looks at you, he smiles.’
Catalina closed her eyes against the pierce of hope and fear. She wanted so much to confess everything to Phaedra, but she knew she could not. ‘He seems a very good man, Lady Phaedra. And—and he makes me smile as well. But I know he needs a different sort of wife than I could be. A proper English duchess.’
‘Truly?’ Phaedra cried. ‘Oh, Mrs Moreno, you must know so little of our family. We never do anything in a “proper English” way. My sister Kate had a disastrous Season, and now she is married to a black man, a former American slave, and living in Boston. I had no Season at all, and you see how I live. Giles is marrying Lily, whose grandmother is a Gypsy and is welcome at our house. And Harry’s Elena is Spanish, just as you are. Not to mention my father’s illegitimate daughter.’
Catalina had to laugh at such a litany of scandal. It did make her fears sound small indeed. A product of growing up in a place where she never felt she really belonged. ‘When you put it like that...’
Phaedra nodded. ‘Jamie needs someone who can help him with the huge task of rebuilding and running Castonbury. Who can make him not brood so very much. Who can make him happy, as the rest of us are happy in our marriages. I don’t know at all if that is you, but—well, if you like my brother, I hope you might give him a chance. He is a good man. That is all.’
Catalina nodded as she thought of what Phaedra had said, all the implications of those seemingly simple words that were not really so simple at all. ‘You have given me so much to think about, Lady Phaedra.’
‘Good. Then I can stop being interfering. It doesn’t suit me so well, I fear.’ The carriage slowed as it came into town and Phaedra glanced out of the window agai
n. ‘Shall I drop you outside the Assembly Rooms?’
‘Yes, that would do well, thank you.’ Once Catalina was alone on the walkway, watching the carriage roll away, she knew that what Phaedra had said was true. She had spent too long dwelling on reasons why she and Jamie should not be together. Yet what if there were reasons why they should be?
But first she had to be rid of the pernicious Webster. She looped her reticule closer about her wrist and turned towards Alicia’s house. She glimpsed Alicia’s pale face at one of the upstairs windows, but she quickly vanished when Catalina knocked at the door.
‘Mrs Moreno,’ she said, her voice full of surprise as she opened the door. ‘How nice to see you again so soon.’
‘I hope I am not calling at an inconvenient time,’ Catalina said.
‘Not at all. Please, do come in.’ Alicia led her to the sitting room, where sewing things littered the table. She quickly swept them into their box. ‘I’m afraid the maid is out, but I could probably make some tea.’
‘No, please don’t go to the trouble. I won’t stay long,’ Catalina said. ‘Is your son here?’
‘He is with my neighbour for the afternoon.’
‘Has there been any trouble?’
Alicia shook her head. ‘No, nothing at all. Crispin just likes to visit her, she is so kind to him. I begin to hope Webster has gone from here, after all.’
‘That is not terribly likely, is it?’ Catalina said. ‘He has lost so much. If he is at all the same as he was in Spain, I doubt he would ever go so quietly.’
‘I fear you are right,’ Alicia said with a sigh. ‘I was a fool for ever listening to him for a moment. But I was so desperate....’
‘There was never a chance Jamie was your child’s father, was there?’ Catalina said quietly. She knew there was not, yet somehow she felt compelled to say it aloud. To have everything out in the open.
Alicia squeezed her eyes closed as her cheeks slowly turned red. ‘No, of course not. He never looked at anyone but you in Spain, Mrs Moreno. I—well, I envied that way he would watch you whenever you were nearby. As if there was no one else in the world at all. But he was never anything but kind to me, as were you. You never deserved what we did, Webster and me. Not at all.’
She pushed herself to her feet and went to look out the window at the street below. ‘Crispin’s father was Colonel Chambers.’
‘Chambers?’ Catalina exclaimed. ‘He was your lover?’
‘Yes,’ Alicia said miserably. ‘He was kind to me as well. He liked to talk to me, as his wife had no time to listen to him at all. I was so very lonely, you see.’
Catalina nodded. She did see. She, too, had felt that terrible, cold sense of being alone in the world—when she had lost Jamie. When she thought he was gone for ever and there could never be understanding between them.
‘I did not know I was pregnant until after he died,’ Alicia went on. ‘And of course Mrs Chambers dismissed me. I didn’t know how to take care of myself and my child, or even how to get home.’
‘And that’s when Webster approached you,’ Catalina said.
‘Yes. I was sure I had no choice, I—all I can do now is say I am sorry. I can never make it up to Lord Hatherton and his family. I can only hope to...’
Suddenly there was the sound of glass shattering from somewhere in the house. Alicia’s head whipped around, and Catalina jumped up from her chair.
‘I thought you said your maid was gone?’ she said.
‘She is. Whatever could that be? This is such a quiet neighbourhood.’ Alicia hurried to the door, and before Catalina could shout at her to stop, to lock it, she swung it open.
Everything happened in a swift, violent blur. Alicia had barely opened the door halfway when a large man shouldered it open hard, knocking her to the floor. He grabbed Catalina hard around the waist as she screamed. He clapped his gloved hand hard to her mouth, and she had a quick glimpse of blond hair and even features.
It was the footman from Castonbury, the one who had given her Jamie’s note.
She heard someone else rush into the room, and the footman pressed his hand even harder to her mouth. She could hardly breathe, but the raw fear made her fight like a wild beast. She kicked at him through her skirts, ruing the fact that she wore delicate kid half-boots. She twisted her head to bite his hand.
‘Crazy bitch,’ the man shouted. He lifted her up and forced her down onto the floor on her stomach.
‘There was only supposed to be the one,’ Catalina heard Webster say as she struggled to be free. There was a sickening crack when Webster slapped Alicia and she cried out. ‘But this is even better. Hatherton is sure to come after the Spanish bitch. I knew something was up when I saw her at Castonbury.’
Catalina kicked back again, struggling to break the man’s painful hold. The next thing she felt was a sharp, heavy pain quick against the back of her head. There was a shower of light behind her eyes, a strange stickiness on her skin. She thought she heard a scream coming from a long way away.
Then nothing.
Chapter Seventeen
‘Catalina? Catalina, wake up. Please, please, wake up!’
The words seemed so blurry and faint. Catalina felt as if she was slowly crawling up through a dark, thick cloud. It pressed down on her head, as if to drag her back down into peaceful sleep, but somehow she knew she had to struggle against it. There seemed to be something she needed just beyond her weak grasp, and that voice pulled her up out of the beckoning darkness.
Painfully, she pried open her gritty eyes. Candlelight pierced her brain, so faint yet so very bright. Her head pounded as if a hundred drums beat inside of it.
‘What is happening?’ she said. Her throat felt so rough.
‘Oh, thank goodness! You are alive.’ Slowly a face swam into view above Catalina. Alicia’s face. Her blonde hair straggled from its pins, and a bruise marred her cheek. ‘I was so frightened. I couldn’t bear for yet another person to be hurt because of me.’
Catalina winced, and found that she lay on a hard floor with her head resting on Alicia’s knee. Wherever they were it felt cold and damp, and dark with just that one flickering candle.
Then it all came flooding back to her. The shattering glass at Alicia’s house, Webster knocking her to the floor. They had been kidnapped by the very man they had been scheming to trap.
Catalina sat up too fast, wincing as pain rushed through her head. ‘Are you hurt, Alicia? Did he...’
‘Oh, no,’ Alicia said quickly. ‘He just knocked me out and somehow brought us here—wherever here is.’
Catalina pressed her fingertips to her temples and studied the dark room they were in. It was a place she knew—the sheepherder’s cottage in the woods where Jamie had brought her the day they had both got caught in that terrible downpour. It was the cottage where they had made love in front of the fire. She slowly pushed herself to her feet and went to try the door. It was securely bolted from the outside.
‘I am sure someone will find us very soon,’ she said, trying to push down the fear rising inside of her. Panic did no good. She went to the shelves along the wall and pulled down some blankets. She handed one to Alicia and wrapped the other around herself. ‘Surely two men can’t take two unconscious women out of the house without someone seeing.’
Alicia nodded, but Catalina could see how pale and frightened she was. ‘Thank heaven Crispin was with the neighbour today. My poor baby. If Webster had got him as well...’ She broke off on a ragged sob.
Catalina sat back down next to her and put her arm around Alicia’s trembling shoulders. ‘All will be well, I am sure. Lady Phaedra knew I was coming to Buxton today, and when I do not make it back to Castonbury she will know something is amiss and will tell Jamie. He will make that bastardo Webster sorry he was ever born.’
Alicia nodded again. ‘You—you do love him, don’t you?’
‘Yes,’ Catalina whispered. ‘I do love him.’ And she realised those were the truest words she had ever spoken.
She loved Jamie more than anything, and she always would. No matter what had happened in Spain, who he had worked for, how long they had been separated, he was her beautiful, kind, strong Jamie. She had been a fool to think she could ever go away from him again. The past was gone. They had both done what they had to do in times of desperation, but now they were through it.
Or so she had hoped.
‘I am sure that is one reason Webster hates Lord Hatherton so much,’ Alicia said.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Webster wanted you in Spain. Once, when they were foxed, he bragged to Colonel Chambers he would have you, and when the colonel laughed at him he was furious. But even Webster could see how you and Lord Hatherton looked at each other. It was just one more thing Hatherton had—family, money, position, women—that Webster could never hope for.’
‘And he took his revenge once he thought Jamie was gone,’ Catalina whispered.
‘Yes. Once he was gone and could no longer fight—and beat—Webster. Webster is a coward. He would never confront someone he hated directly. But now—now Hatherton is back.’
‘Webster is surely done for.’
‘I only hope we get out of here to see it.’ Alicia sat back against the wall and stared into the flickering flame of the candle. ‘I loved Colonel Chambers too.’
‘Did you?’ Catalina said. She could see the truth of it in the sadness in Alicia’s eyes, and she suddenly felt something she had never thought she would for the woman—sympathy.
‘Yes. Not as you love Hatherton, perhaps, but in my own way. He was so kind to me, and for a while I wasn’t lonely any longer.’ Alicia hugged her knees closer. ‘But I know he is truly gone for ever and I will never have another chance with him. Not as you have now with Hatherton.’
Catalina turned Alicia’s words over in her mind. She and Jamie did have another chance, a miraculous chance to find each other again. She had been so foolish ever to push that away, even for good reasons. Love was a gift given to so few. She and Jamie had found it again, and she wouldn’t let it go twice.
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