“How did you find me?”
“Christopher,” James answers, stealing glances at me like he’s having as hard of a time believing I’m here as I am. “We tracked him down when you went missing, and he used a tracking spell to get us to you.”
“I felt him,” I murmur, putting a hand over my heart. “So…he’s back?”
James doesn’t answer right away. He exchanges a look with Rowan in the rearview and my heart sinks as I realize things aren’t as settled as I let myself hope.
“He said he’d be there when we got back,” Rowan answers carefully. “We couldn’t have found you without him.”
“There’s still the fact that you shouldn’t have left at all,” James growls.
“I know,” I murmur. I feel guilty for lying to them, especially knowing how close that came to being the end, but when I look back at my brother sleeping in the back seat, it’s hard to regret my decision.
“Aspen,” I say suddenly. “He’s still with Christopher, isn’t he?”
“Yeah, I was gonna ask you about that,” James says, frowning. “How the hell did he get out here?”
I sigh, leaning back against my door. “It’s a long story.”
“We got nothin’ but time,” Rowan grunts, draping his heavy arm across the back of my seat. “You’d better start talkin’.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Recounting everything that happened to Rowan and James is like reliving it all over again, but luckily Albien wakes up halfway through and, after being given a change of clothes and some much-needed coffee, he helps me fill in the gaps of the whole sordid affair.
James and Rowan are still furious, and I’m sure Christopher is too, even though I still have a bone or two to pick with him, but I’m too happy to be with them to care. And exhausted, but I know there’s still a long road ahead of me.
Aedan is still out there, and so is Mace. As long as that remains true, Albien and I are only safe until the next winter solstice.
A year. It feels like tomorrow and already, I feel the dread closing in around the relief.
This is bigger than me and my twin. Aedan admitted that he wants to overthrow Eternus itself, and if he gets access to the power he wants, I can’t imagine he’ll stop there.
For now, I’m choosing to celebrate our survival as a victory and I agree to give myself at least one day to enjoy it before I start planning for the future. Planning to make sure we have a future.
As soon as we make it to the castle, we’re swarmed by guards and knights, and Jenna is first among them. She throws the back door open, practically throwing Rowan aside to reach Albien.
“Your Majesty!” she cries, tears in her eyes as she bows before him when he steps out of the vehicle. If there was any doubt that her feelings for my brother run much deeper than country loyalty, they disappear as soon as she looks at him. I’ve never seen so much grief and joy on someone’s face at the same time. “Forgive me. I failed you.”
Albien looks at her, startled by her words. “Failed me?” he murmurs.
“And you,” she says, looking to me. I know what she’s thinking. I’m not sure how much she remembers of Aedan’s control, but after what I’ve witnessed, I know she had no part in handing me over to him.
I give her a reassuring smile. “It wasn’t you, Lady Jenna. It was Aedan. He’s capable of more than anyone imagined.”
Jenna nods, but I can tell that my absolution is only going to go so far. She opens her mouth to speak to Albien, but when he pulls her into his arms, the words seem to leave her. “I’m so glad to see you,” he says, turning his head into her neck.
Jenna slowly relaxes and returns the embrace, as uncustomary as it is. For the moment, none of that matters. As unlikely as it is, we’ve become a family, and all that matters is that we’re together again.
Once we head inside, Albien and Jenna go off to recover with the promise that we’ll all reunite soon, once we’ve had the chance to clean up, rest, and hopefully eat something. I’m starving, but not half as desperate for food as I am for a shower. I tell James and Rowan as much, and there’s some bickering over who should stand guard and who should help me, which I can resolve easily enough.
“You could both join me.”
They fall silent, like they’re not sure if I’m joking. I can’t help the smile that comes to my lips as I lean in the doorway. “I’ve been through hell and there’s only one thing I want even more than a solid hour of hot water cascading down my skin. That thing happens to be both of you, in equal measure. Or are we going to have to draw straws?”
They look at each other for a moment and Rowan is the first to shrug. He takes a step through the doorway and peels off his shirt, revealing the muscular column of his torso beneath. He’s a sight for sore eyes, but I look James’ way as he adjusts the water.
James is far more hesitant about disrobing in front of his fellow knight, but when his eyes meet mine, they darken with the same need I feel. It’s been too long since I’ve been around them and the hunger is overwhelming. As soon as James’ clothes hit the floor, I wrap my arms around him and kiss him hard. He returns it and our tongues tangle breathlessly until Rowan clears his throat, reminding us we’re not alone.
As if I could forget. I give him an appeasing smile and step into the shower beside him, my hand still folded in James’. The water hits my scalp first, washing the blood through my hair, and the sensation is orgasmic. I can’t help the moan that escapes me, and the look in Rowan’s eyes suggests he knows it’s about more than just the water flow.
“I think our girl missed us,” Rowan says huskily, putting his big hands around my waist. I feel James come closer from behind, and even though he’s usually colder than I am, the heat coming off him puts the shower to shame.
“I’d say so,” James purrs, tracing his fingers down the curve of my spine. I gasp and play right into his hands—or rather, Rowan’s—bending forward into the other alpha while James presses up against me from behind. James reaches for the shampoo bottle and the pleasant aroma of herbs and spices is diffused in the steam as he works the soap into a lather. The moment his fingers dig into my hair, working the scented mixture into my tresses, it’s pure heaven.
Then Rowan makes it even better when his lips press against my throat. His hand hooks around the small of my back, pulling me up against the length of his fully erect cock. I moan in bliss as James’ fingers massage their way down my scalp and the back of my neck, working out every last bit of tension. As the water washes us clean, all I can think about is all the dirty things I want to do with my alphas.
Now James’ lips are on my neck and the familiar need rises up in my core. I gasp as Rowan’s finger slips down over my clit, causing the bud of flesh to swell and twitch in arousal. I buck into his hand as his finger slips inside of me and I feel James’ length pressed into the small of my back.
I want them both, and the need becomes almost painful as Rowan’s lips claim mine. I part my lips so his tongue can enter my mouth and James allows his fangs to graze my skin so deliciously. I long for nothing more than his bite, to erase the memories of the blade that cut my flesh so recently, even if the wound has already healed. I’d tell him, but all I can seem to do is kiss and pant and writhe between them as I grope their hard, tensed bodies to pull them both closer.
They crush me between them and it’s the sweetest breathlessness I’ve ever experienced. Rowan pulls my thigh up over his and James puts his hand over my belly to help support me for the other man’s claim. This unexpected cooperation between them is at once surprising and arousing, and by the time Rowan’s thick member enters me, I’m so ready I could scream.
In fact, now that I think of it, I am. His name flows so easily off my tongue as I lean all the way back into James. He’s all but entirely supporting my weight, making the mind-bending position possible.
“God,” he breathes. At first, I’m worried he’s offended by the way I’m writhing in desperation for another man’s cock
. Then his hand slips between my legs and he starts touching me as he grinds into me from behind. “That’s hot.”
Rowan growls in agreement, his eyes darkening as he tunnels into me. Every time he thrusts, I see stars. Between him filling me up and James’ expert touch, I come twice in the span of a few minutes, and they’re still going strong.
If I’d had any idea they were this much of a force to be reckoned with together… James is so close to penetrating me from behind, but the grinding feels good, too. Judging from the way he’s groping my breast with his left hand and bucking into me, it feels good for him, too.
On the verge of my third orgasm, Rowan spills his seed inside of me and pushes me over the edge. A moment later, I feel James’ slick against my back as he trembles with me in his grasp. I moan in delight, pressed between them as we enjoy the aftershocks of the pleasure we just shared.
Rowan eases out of me, keeping his hands on my hips to hold me steady. Not that there was any chance of falling with James behind me, still worshiping my neck with his mouth.
I turn around to face him, capturing his lips. “That was amazing,” I murmur, leaning back against Rowan as I reach up behind my head to stroke his hair. “Both of you. I could get used to this.”
Rowan gives another husky laugh. “We’ll see.”
“Mmh,” James moans noncommittally. If it was a one-time deal, I’ll appreciate it for what it was, but part of me hopes they’ll come around. Like all good things, it’s even better when we’re together.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
That night, long after I’ve recovered from the best shower of my life, I end up in the parlor, sitting on the sofa in a fresh set of pajamas and sipping a cup of hot cocoa James made me. There’s still so much we have to discuss, but Christopher will be here soon. I hope.
I’m still not sure what I’ll say to him, but the moment he walks into the room, I have my answer. He freezes and looks at me like he’s seen a ghost. I can’t tell if it’s anger, or maybe even guilt over our last encounter, but it turns to surprise when I run to embrace him.
He eventually hugs me back, burying his face in my neck. It’s more of an instinct for our kind, and his scent is just as comforting to me. “Thank you,” I murmur. They’re the only words that really seem to matter, after all the ones I’ve rehearsed in my head.
He tenses up, like he wasn’t expecting that response any more than I was. “For what?”
“I felt you in the woods,” I say, pulling away from him. “I know you’re the one who tracked me down.”
He looks away and now I know for certain what the emotion is. It’s guilt. “Of course I did. I never should have left.”
His words warm me deep inside. “Then you’ll come back?” I ask hopefully.
He refuses to meet my eyes, dashing my hopes that it could really be that simple. “I can’t.”
“Why not?” I ask, sounding far more desperate than I want to.
“When I did that to you… when I went into your mind,” he murmurs, sounding as if the memory is as painful to him as it is to me. “I realized I was out of control. That I’d gone too far.”
“Christopher…”
“I left because I was afraid of what I’d do if I stayed,” he says hoarsely. “What I’d become. I’ve been doing this so long, keeping it a secret for so long, that I thought I had it under control, but… I don’t.”
“Christopher has been working with mages,” James says calmly, trying to help him. Trying to help me understand.
“Mages?” I whisper. “In this kingdom?”
Christopher smiles faintly. “There are more than you’d think. Not all of them are bad. There’s a group that’s been helping me learn to control the power I invited in when I started all this.”
“How?” I ask, shaking my head. That’s what I still don’t understand, after all this time. “How did you get into this, anyway?”
Before, he was a closed book, but after everything that’s happened, I feel like I have a better chance of getting an honest answer out of him than I ever have.
“I found an old book in the pack archives,” he murmurs. “It was hidden. I think it was confiscated in a raid or something. Whatever the case, I was fascinated by it. I tried a few of the minor spells, and when they worked…” He lets out a deep breath. “It was intoxicating. More than that, I thought maybe it would help. Maybe I could become good enough that I could actually protect you.”
His words feel like a punch in the gut. All this time, I thought his distance was because he was bored of me. Because he’d given up trying. To know that he never gave up on our childhood dream of escape, even if it took us on divergent paths, at once fills me with warmth and breaks my heart.
“Christopher,” I breathe. “All I ever wanted was you.”
“I know,” he says, taking my hand. “And one day, I plan on being someone you deserve, but right now…” He shakes his head, dropping my hand. “It’s not safe for me to be around you. Not yet.”
His words cut deep, and I feel like there’s a hand around my throat, choking the breath out of me, but I won’t let myself give in to the pain. Not in front of them. I need to be strong. There’s so much left to do. So many battles we have to win in order to see a future where we can exist together, in peace.
“I guess I’ll just have to wait, then,” I say hoarsely. “But there’s still something I need your help with.”
“Anything,” he says, holding my gaze.
I clear my throat, trying to get it together. Trying to get my head back in the game. “The night of the solstice, after Aedan sent you and Aspen away, he went through with the sacrifice. Mace tried to stop it, but Aedan overpowered him.”
That’s the one part of my story Rowan and James didn’t seem to believe until Albien corroborated it, and Christopher looks just as shocked. I still haven’t told any of them the truth about my real father, either.
“Why would he try to stop it?” he asks in disbelief.
“I don’t know,” I admit. “I just know that before it happened, I saw a glow in his eyes. The same one I saw in yours when you used that spell on me, and in Jenna’s, before she handed me over to the vampire who was working for Mace. Aedan is controlling him, and I have no idea how deep it goes.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Rowan growls. “He’s a traitor.”
“He’s right,” says James. “He’s been under Aedan’s control since he was a child, if everything he said is true. Everything you know of Mace is a product of that. I don’t know why he saved you, but he can’t be trusted.”
I know they’re right. I can’t trust Mace, and I never will. If there’s anything in him that exists outside of Aedan’s control, it’s probably nothing more than a sliver, and yet, I can’t get the look in his eyes as he held that knife to my throat out of my head. As he fought back the control that’s all he’s ever known.
Why? Why would he do that for me, when Aedan means everything to him? Why would he even care?
“That’s not what I need help with,” I murmur, forcing myself to focus on the issue at hand rather than the mystery I may never be able to solve. “Mace tried to save me, but he failed. Aedan went through with the sacrifice, but as soon as my blood went into the stone, the ritual failed and the light disappeared. He was furious, and I don’t remember everything he said, but he looked me right in the eye and said, ‘Death.’ I was just wondering if you knew what he might have meant.”
Christopher listens, his eyes widening in curiosity. “No idea. But if the ritual didn’t work, he must have gotten something wrong. I was researching it with the coven, and all this Magus stuff is the real deal, as far as it sounds.” He frowns. “But that means you’re not a wolf.”
“No,” I say, realizing this is the moment of truth. “I’m not. Um. Aedan told me the truth about our birth parents. Our mother was the Queen, but our father… he was human.”
The others fall silent as they take in the latest bit of information. I’m still no
t sure what to think of it myself. On the one hand, I’m relieved it’s not Aedan, but on the other, it leaves so many questions unanswered. One troubles me more than the others.
“What if Aedan is wrong?” I ask. “What if Albien and I aren’t what he thinks?”
“I don’t think that’s what it is,” James says suddenly. We all turn to face him, and the look on his face gives me pause.
“What is it?” I ask warily.
“Mace told you that death and magic can’t coexist,” James replies.
“That’s right. Aedan’s body was destroyed by it because magic always rejects a dead host,” I answer.
“Exactly,” says James.
My heart beats faster. “I’m a hybrid, but Aedan said my father was human. A mage, not a vampire.”
“Not you,” James says quietly. “You left before I had the chance to tell you, but Danica… I think you’re pregnant.”
It takes a while for his words to sink in and once they do, I can’t make sense of them. “Pregnant?” I echo, touching my stomach. “That’s… what?”
“When you passed out and started showing symptoms, I had my suspicions,” he says quietly. “That elixir I gave you… it contained blood. My blood.”
“Yours?” I ask in disbelief. Now the strong scent and taste of the concoction makes sense.
“Vampire blood is easy for a wolf to smell,” he says. “Lavender and mugwort disguise it well enough.”
I remember the vampire Mace sent to retrieve me and now I understand. James must have used the same mixture to conceal the scent and taste of his blood. “But why?” I’m not sure what to feel. None of it seems real, but most of all, I’m just confused.
“The baby is a quarter vampire, if it’s mine,” he says with guilt in his tone. “Judging from the way you responded to the blood, it is.”
“How is that possible?” asks Rowan. “She’s part mage.”
“That, I don’t know,” says James. The gravity in his voice makes me even more conflicted about how to feel. I love him, and it’s not like the idea of having his baby has never occurred to me. As unexpected as it is, my first impulse is to be thrilled, but the look in his eyes stops me short. “But I’m sure that’s what kept the sacrifice from working.”
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