“Will you talk to her about it?”
Riley sipped her tea, giving her a chance to consider Jennifer’s question. “I’m not sure I want to. She’s been gone so long, and now I know who my real dad is, and that they’ve had a family that didn’t include me, I’m not sure I ever want to see any of them.”
“What about your brother?” Jennifer asked carefully.
Riley met her gaze. Jennifer had asked the one question she was unsure how to answer. She knew in her heart she didn’t want to see her mother or biological father, but her brother? He’d done nothing wrong. “I don’t know. It’s not his fault, but I’m not ready to meet him.”
“Okay.”
Riley had had enough of talking about it. The events of the day had exhausted her. She looked over at the books on the table, deciding a change of subject would help lighten her dark mood. “So, how’s your studying going?”
“Not great. I’ve been reading the same paragraph for hours. It’s not sinking in.”
Perhaps not the wisest of subject changes. Jennifer had to be going out of her mind with worry about her sister. Christ, Riley could barely wrap her head around it, which meant Jennifer must be pulling her hair out. “Kelsey?”
“Yeah. I know she’ll be fine, they do hundreds of these operations every year, but I can’t help worrying.”
“Yeah, me too. She’s a strong woman. She won’t let anything happen to her or the baby.”
“She better not. The last thing I need is her leaving me with you,” she added, a smile tugging at her lips
Just like Jennifer, always throwing out the insults. Although it didn’t feel like an insult. Teasing is what it was, maybe even a little flirting? She could always hope. “Hey, I thought you liked me now.”
“Yes. Somehow you’ve managed to worm your way in.”
“I’m sure I’ll do something to piss you off at some point. It’s been a rough few days and I’m not at the top of my game. Once Kelsey is sorted and everything goes back to normal, I’ll be back to my annoying self.”
Jennifer gave her a sweet smile, then rolled her eyes. “I have no doubt about that.”
They stared at each other for a long while. Riley had the urge to kiss the lips that were so close to her own. What she’d said was true: the last few days had been rough, and she didn’t want to do anything stupid, and kissing Jennifer would be a stupid thing to do. She wasn’t even sure Jennifer liked her. No, that wasn’t true. Jennifer might not be able to admit it to herself, but Riley could see it in her eyes. She stood from the couch, putting her mug on the coffee table in front of her. The sooner she left, the better. Before she did something dumb.
“Do you want another tea?” Jennifer asked.
“No, I better get going. Hopefully my mum isn’t still waiting at my house.”
Jennifer stood also and shifted from foot to foot, twirling the hem of her sleep shirt. She was nervous, not an emotion Riley would equate with her ever.
“Do you want to stay here tonight?” Jennifer murmured, a slight blush tinging her cheeks.
That was not what Riley had expected her to say. “I’m sure she’ll be gone by now.”
“I wasn’t asking for you. I was asking because I don’t really want to be here by myself.” Jennifer looked away, looked everywhere except at Riley. This was hard for her to admit, clearly. “I’ll only end up awake all night worrying about Kelsey.”
Riley stared at her for a moment, thinking of and disregarding reasons to stay, reasons to leave. In the end she followed her gut. “Okay, if you’re sure.”
They locked up the house, then headed upstairs. Riley turned right, toward Kelsey’s room.
“Where are you going?” Jennifer asked in a quiet voice.
Riley turned around slowly, then indicated Kelsey’s room with a tilt of her head. “Kelsey’s room.”
“I, um, was kind of hoping maybe you’d stay with me, in my room.”
Now that was unexpected. “I’d normally say something crude here or tease you, but I can see how worried you are about Kelsey, so I’ll just say okay.” She pretended it was for Jennifer but in reality, she wanted to be as close to her crush as she could get. Nothing might ever happen between them and it could be the only chance she had. Riley knew she was taking advantage, but she didn’t care. She was too selfish. She followed Jennifer into her bedroom.
“Thank you. But make sure you stick to your side of the bed.”
She grinned. “No promises.”
Jennifer pulled out some spare sleeping attire from her chest of drawers and handed it to her. Riley excused herself to the bathroom to change, allowing Jennifer some privacy to change also. As much as she wanted to watch Jennifer undress, now wasn’t the time. Too much was going on for them both.
She came back into the bedroom, and Jennifer was already in the bed, waiting for her. Riley lifted her side of the duvet and slipped in, the heat from Jennifer’s body warming her skin although a good few inches separated them. She settled the covers over herself and willed herself to sleep. Being this close to Jennifer was torture, she balled her hands into fists to stop herself from reaching for her. It was going to be a long night.
“Goodnight, Riley,” Jennifer whispered.
“Sleep well, Jenny.”
Chapter Fifteen
“Are you ready?” Jennifer asked Kelsey, who was lying in the hospital bed waiting to go up for her operation. Jennifer couldn’t miss the look of fear on her face. Kelsey had always hated hospitals, feeling no good ever happened in them. She supposed the death of their parents hadn’t helped that fear.
“As I’ll ever be,” she said, her tone subdued.
“You’ll be fine.” Jennifer smoothed Kelsey’s hair back, then rested her hand on her cheek, noting her skin was cool to the touch. “The doctors know what they are doing.”
“I need you to promise me something.”
“Anything.”
“If something goes wrong, can you promise you’ll watch out for Riley? Before you say anything, just listen. She’s had it tough since her mum left. She won’t admit it to anyone, but she isn’t as strong as everyone believes. I know you have your issues with her, but for me, please look out for her.”
“You don’t need to worry. I promise. It won’t be that hard anyway as we’ve gotten to know each other since you’ve been in here.” She thought back to earlier that morning, waking up in the same bed as Riley. Riley had stuck to her word and remained on her side of the mattress. It was Jennifer who had moved. Sometime during the night, she had shifted over and woke up to find herself snuggled in Riley’s embrace. Without thinking, she had moved in closer still, feeling Riley’s arms tighten around her in her sleep. Jennifer had gotten wet. And she panicked. As gracefully as she could, she escaped the room and took a cold shower. She prayed Riley wasn’t aware of Jennifer’s body betraying her.
But she’d had nothing to worry about. Riley acted normally, giving no indication she had any clue how turned-on Jennifer had been.
“I spoke to Riley before you came in and she refused to talk to me about yesterday, her dad’s funeral. She said she didn’t want to upset me. That’s the first time since I’ve known her that she hasn’t opened up to me. Is she okay?”
“It’s not my place to tell you. Riley will give you all the gory details when you’re better, so you better look after yourself in there. She is okay, though. She has some stuff to think about, work through, and she knows we are both here for her should she need us.”
Kelsey stared at her, studying her. Heat shot through Jennifer’s face. “You like her, don’t you? I knew it!”
She smiled. “She’s growing on me, yes.”
“No, you’re blushing. What’s happened? Come on, tell me.”
“Nothing has happened. We’ve just spent a little time together and maybe I was quick to judge her, that’s all. I swear.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re finally giving her a chance. She deserves to be happy.”
�
�You’re getting way ahead of yourself. All I said is I don’t want to throttle her every time she opens her mouth.” No, you want to tear her clothes off!
“That’s because you’re keeping it busy with your own.”
“You’re incorrigible.”
“That’s why you love me.”
“No, I love you because you’re my sister, my friend.”
“Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I’ve never said it but I’m so grateful for the way you took care of me.” Tears filled Kelsey’s eyes, and Jennifer wiped them away.
“Always.”
A nurse opened the door to the room. “Excuse me, the doctors are ready for you.”
Jennifer looked back at her sister. “I’ll see you in a little while. Look after my niece or nephew.”
She headed back in to the waiting room, looking for Riley. Their conversations that morning had been sparse but pleasant, as if both of them were afraid of stepping on the other’s toes. They had gotten up, gotten ready, and after a quick breakfast, headed to the hospital.
She found Riley sitting on one of the plastic chairs, head resting in her hands. No one else was in the small room. Riley looked up as Jennifer approached. She had been crying. Eyes red and cheeks still damp. She scrubbed her hands over her face when she saw Jennifer.
“Hey,” Riley whispered.
“They’ve taken her up. She shouldn’t be long.” Jennifer sat next to her, trying her best not to allow any contact between them. She wouldn’t be able to think if they touched. “How are you doing?”
“I should be asking you that.”
“I’m okay.”
They were silent for a moment, and she could feel Riley’s gaze on her. Jennifer squared her shoulders, determined to project just how fine she was. She might be screaming on the inside with worry over Kelsey, but she wasn’t about to let anyone see that.
“You know, being the older sister must have been tough for you. Giving up school to look after her. I can imagine you’ve had to be pretty strong, guarding Kelsey’s heart all these years.”
“I wouldn’t change any of it.”
“No, you wouldn’t. But you don’t have to be strong in front of me. I won’t think any less of you if you need to ask for help.”
Riley held open her hand for Jennifer to take. Jennifer stared at it for a second before sliding her own into Riley’s palm. When did she get so good at reading me? The contact stilled her nerves. She blew out a breath, her shoulders sagging. She didn’t need to pretend in front of Riley. Riley knew how she was feeling because she was feeling the same. Jennifer was glad she was here with her. Riley would support her, no questions asked.
“I asked for help last night,” she said. She hadn’t planned on it. However, the thought of being alone, worrying about Kelsey, worrying about Riley, didn’t instill confidence that she would get a good night’s sleep. She had blurted the request out, the words escaping her lips before she could stop them. Her relief when Riley agreed to stay confused her. A week ago, hell, even yesterday, she would have said it was absurd how much she needed Riley’s solid presence next to her; now she couldn’t imagine Riley never being there. And that confused Jennifer even more.
“Yes, you did. And you were embarrassed this morning when we woke up.”
“You’re right, I was embarrassed. Not because I asked you to stay. I think with everything going on we both needed someone.” Deciding she had to start being honest with herself, she said, “I don’t know if you know of my dating history.”
Riley groaned, turning her head to look at Jennifer. “Kelsey has taken great delight in tormenting me with the details.”
“Tormenting?” Jennifer asked, grinning at Riley’s apparent discomfort.
“Yes. She knew I had a crush on you and thought it hilarious to let me know when you were out on a date.”
So she does have a crush on me. Jennifer smiled, pleased to the nth degree she wasn’t alone in feeling an attraction. “Well, you should know then that I haven’t dated much. And when I did it was always with guys, but it never felt right. Last night was the first night I ever shared a bed with a woman. When I woke up lying in your arms, hearing your heart beat beneath my ear, I panicked.”
“Why?”
“Because I enjoyed it too much. It felt right.” Riley squeezed her hand, giving her the encouragement to continue. “I never gave much thought to my sexuality. Once my parents died I didn’t have time to date and when I did it was always guys who had asked me out. I did what I thought I was supposed to do.”
“And now?”
“And now I realise I was wrong.” The heat of another blush worked its way up her neck. “I think giving how turned-on I was being next to you is a clear indication I might be gay.”
“Do you think it was because I’m a woman or because it was me?”
“I don’t know,” she said helplessly. “Does it really matter?” She looked away.
“I guess not.”
“Anyway, you should be pleased. You’ve charmed your way in. I no longer have the urge to kill you.”
Riley laughed.
A moment later she felt Riley’s hand on her chin, turning her head so Riley could look her in the eye. Her face was serious now, all her muscles relaxed. Her hand remained where it was, warm against Jennifer’s skin.
“There’s something you should know, Jenny. You’re not just another woman to me. I didn’t ‘charm’ my way in for the fun of it. I really do like you. I always have.”
Jennifer was dismayed to feel tears sting her eyes. She had hurt Riley so many times with her callous words over the years. And yet she hadn’t scared her off. Riley really was a special woman. Kelsey had seen it right away, when they met at ten years old. It had taken her a while, but Jennifer saw it too.
“I know. I’m sorry it took me so long to figure it out.”
Riley looked away, then tilted her head back until it rested against the wall. “It doesn’t matter. So, what now?”
“I think with everything going on with Kelsey, now isn’t the time to be starting anything. I’m sorry if that upsets you, but you must agree we’ve both got a lot going on right now.” It was the right decision. Jennifer needed time to adjust to her growing feelings for Riley and she needed to be there for Kelsey, without distractions. And Riley would be a distraction.
“Yes, you’re right. But can I still see you?”
“You’re always at the house, so you’ll see me all the time,” she teased.
“I didn’t mean that.”
“I know.” Jennifer squeezed her hand. “I need time, Riley.”
“Okay.”
They sat in silence for the remainder of the time until Doctor Baily came down the corridor toward them. They both stood from their chairs.
“How is she?” Jennifer asked. She took Riley’s hand, needing all the strength she could get from her. She didn’t know what she would do if it was bad news.
“She’s in recovery. Everything went well. We’ll keep her in until her blood pressure settles. When it does, there is no reason she can’t go home. She’ll need to stay on bed rest to prevent her pre-eclampsia acting up. She’ll need looking after.”
Jennifer released the breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding. “That’s fine. I have some holiday saved up. I can take time off work to stay with her.”
“She will also need to keep up with her appointments.”
“I will make sure she goes.” No way would she let Kelsey get away with avoiding the doctor again, despite how much she hated doctors and hospitals, but when it came to her health, she would not be giving her a choice in the matter. Jennifer could be just as stubborn as her sister.
“I’ll send a nurse to come get you when she’s settled and awake.”
“Thank you, Doctor.” Doctor Baily nodded, then strode away.
“I can take time off from the garage too.”
Jennifer turned to Riley, surprised at the unexpected offer. But of course Ri
ley would offer; that’s who she was, always thinking of others. “You don’t need to do that.”
“I want to. She’s my best friend.”
“We’ll work something out.”
Chapter Sixteen
The next evening Jennifer was alone, reading on the sofa. She had spent most of the day at the hospital with Kelsey. She had tried her best to keep her mind off Riley, concentrating on her sister’s words, but it was no good. Remembering lying in Riley’s arms stirred her senses and it was all she could do not to head to the nearest bathroom to take care of the arousal that seemed to plague her every waking hour.
She had never felt like this before about anyone and it scared her. It made sense now, all the times she’d put Riley down with her disapproving words and looks, she’d been trying to mask her true feelings, and her attraction.
Shame washed over her. Riley hadn’t, didn’t deserve that kind of treatment from anyone. When Riley had come to the house the evening of her father’s funeral, she had looked so lost, so empty. I suppose seeing your mum after eighteen years would do that to you.
Jennifer tossed the book onto the coffee table, giving up trying to read. Her thoughts were elsewhere—with Riley, with Kelsey. As she stood to grab a glass of wine from the kitchen, her doorbell rang. She glanced at her watch, noting the time. Eight thirty. She looked through the peephole, not in the mood for company, but smiled when she saw Riley. She unlocked the deadbolt and opened the door wide.
“Hey. Since when do you knock?” Riley looked good, too good. Her hair was swept back and recently washed. Her jeans hugged her lean thighs, and her denim jacket looked comfortable, well worn.
“Usually Kelsey’s here and she doesn’t mind me barging in. You on the other hand can be somewhat combative when I do that, so I thought I’d be considerate for a change.” Her grin sent Jennifer’s pulse racing, but she knew that Riley wasn’t telling the truth. The way her gaze shifted away from Jennifer’s to look at the ground was a clear Riley-avoidance tactic. After seventeen years Jennifer had picked up on reading a few of her traits.
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