“Communication, little one. We fucked up with that last time, I won’t allow it to happen again. Your parents don’t worry me. They sure as hell shouldn’t worry you either; I have no issues beating the pair of them senseless. The other Masters would jump at the chance to assist me.”
Bodie welled up again at the unified front Braun presented. If he asked it of them, the Masters would help him do whatever he needed. They might rib each other mercilessly and have their disagreements, but they banded together like brothers in arms.
“Jasper would be the first,” Braun added nonchalantly. “He despises abuse of any kind. Been known to coldcock Doms who’ve stepped over the line between consensual and assholery.”
She jerked, shocked. “But...but he’s a sadist.”
“Pain’s arousing to a lot of people, Bodie. Some can only handle a light paddling; others need a darker kind of pain to reach their pinnacle. Jasper’s the kind of guy masochists flock to in droves because they know he’ll give them exactly what they need to fly, then catch them when they lose momentum.”
That actually sounded kinda...appealing. “Fly how?”
Braun chuckled. “Well, orgasms are pretty popular. Subspace is achievable if the sub’s in the right headspace. Some find it harder to reach than others, but with patience and trust, flying isn’t an insurmountable task.” His lips touched her forehead; she closed her eyes and absorbed the warmth. “Considering we’re discussing this as adults, does this mean you’re not against the idea of...”
Snuggled up on his chest, it didn’t seem to be the worst idea. The rest of what it entailed...maybe she’d think again when they got to it, but after the month she’d had, saying yes to Braun wasn’t as difficult as she first thought. “I still don’t think I’m submissive...” she began, then giggled when he flicked her earlobe. “But everyone else thinks that I am, so...”
“I’m liking where the ‘so’ is leading.”
Bodie flattened her hand over his chest. “I’ll try. I’m not going to promise I can do it because I’ve never done anything remotely close to what you’re asking. Trying is all I’ve got to give.”
“Then that’s all I want from you. Your best shot, Bodie.” His big body relaxed as though her answer sucked all the underlying tension out of him. “I meant what I said about communication. You need to talk to me, little one, when things overwhelm you, instead of shutting me out and taking off. Understand me?”
“Yes. Yes, Sir,” she amended, rolling the honorific on her tongue for size. The honorific was particularly important, she recalled from her research. Respect and obedience were two essential components of this journey.
She just needed to remind her tongue before it got her into trouble.
“God, I love the way that sounds in your voice,” Braun murmured. “Good girl. Just remember we can take this slow, Bodie. I’m not striving for perfection right out of the gate; I want you enjoy what we do together, and I’m hoping you’ll love learning as much as I love teaching.”
It amazed her how he knew just what to say to shear the rough edges off her anxieties. She realized she’d essentially just signed herself over into his care—score one for research—and that in his world, he could do pretty much anything he wanted to her now as long as she consented.
Part of her waited for him to change, to shift into big, bad Dom mode and take charge straight off the bat, but he was still the same laid-back, chilled out man she’d begun to trust. His hand still caressed her nape, his attitude hadn’t leaped from calm to domineering, and best of all, his voice still held all the warmth she was coming to depend on for inner peace.
“While we’re here, we may as well address the kiss,” Braun decided. “If it triggered you, I need to know. Doesn’t mean I won’t do it again, because there’s not much going to come between me and that mouth of yours, but I can take precautions so we don’t have a repeat of last time.”
Oh boy, she was dreading this conversation. Explaining her reaction meant divulging secrets not even Liam knew—that was going to piss him off—and she just wasn’t ready to lay her whole fucked up life on the table. She doubted he was going to like ninety percent of her history, and she would never forgive herself if he decided to take the Masters and go on a revenge mission on her behalf.
Her parents were possibly the most psychotic duo in current times.
She wriggled, wanting to sit up so she wasn’t in such an exposed position, but Braun kept her down effortlessly. “Just relax, little one. We’re going to use tonight to get you comfortable with me again. We made some headway when we last in here; we need to get back to that. Submission doesn’t have to leave you feeling vulnerable, Bodie. It can empower you if you let it.”
Do as he says, Bodie. This is part of it, remember? Trusting him to make the tough calls without hurting you. He’s experienced, he’s a nice guy, and Liam sees him as a good boss and a better friend. Just go with the flow.
“I...the kiss was amazing.” It wasn’t a lie. “I just don’t like it when I...”
“It’s okay, you can tell me. My job is to listen, little one. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and just let the words come. No judgement, I promise.”
Her fingers curled into his shirt, held on. She could do this. No matter how embarrassing it was, she could tell him this one thing without dying from mortification. Eyes squeezed shut, she jolted when his hand covered hers and stroked her knuckles. “I don’t like it when I get wet,” she blurted nervously, braced for his laughter. “It freaks me out, and every time I’m near you it happens, and I hate it.”
“Hmmm, I can see how that would be a problem. Do you touch yourself when you’re aroused? Play with yourself, make yourself come?”
Bodie's eyes popped open and she stared at him with something akin to horror. “What? Why the hell would I do that?”
“That’s a resounding no. Something for us to work on. Quite frankly, I’d be more concerned if you didn’t get wet at all. A dry pussy is no fun for either party—at least we know you respond to stimulus.” Braun’s brow furrowed in thought. “Have you ever orgasmed, Bodie? With a lover?”
This is going to come back and bite me on the ass, she thought miserably. They were skating on the edge of darker, deeper secrets and she had the most atrocious balance. “Umm...no?”
“You’ve never had an orgasm,” he muttered. “We’ll have to rectify that sooner than later, won’t we? Anyway, we’ve ascertained you don’t like being aroused but we’ll get you through that. Can you tell me what, aside from kissing, turns you on?”
You, breathing. You, speaking. You, period.
Damn you.
“Your voice. When you pick me up. That thing you do with your hand on the back of my neck.” She felt heat rising into her cheeks and ducked her face into his shirt.
“Honest answers, clever girl,” he purred.
When you call me good girl and clever girl. Oh yeah, they were the kickers all right. The words that had her body trembling to obey, needing to hear those words of praise so she felt good and she felt clever, just like he said she was.
“Seeing as your current limits list isn’t an accurate representation of your likes and dislikes, we’ll attend to that tomorrow night before we begin playing. I need to know how you truly feel about several activities, little one, because I’m going to ask you to try a lot of different and exciting things. Do you know about safewords?”
She nodded slowly. “Red stops a scene immediately, yellow hits the pause button. Green means I’m okay and want to keep going.”
“Exactly right. The traffic light system works well in the club atmosphere because the monitors are listening for it. If they hear red or yellow, they’ll step in if the Dominant leading the scene ignores the safeword. No one does that in my club more than once—one strike and they’re out on their ass.” So saying, Braun maneuvered her like a ragdoll until she sprawled over the top of his body instead of tucked into his side. He adjusted the blanket until she was covered, o
nly her feet poking out at the bottom, then slipped his hands beneath the material. “I always respect a safeword, little one, no matter what. There’s no excuse for disregarding a sub's safety net.”
Bodie gulped.
“I’m going to touch you, all over, front and back. I want to find out where all the sneaky erogenous zones are hiding, maybe exploit them a bit. When you get wet—and you will—I want you to safeword if you feel any hint of unease. Can you do that for me?”
Shit, she shouldn’t have told him any of that. He was using it to torture her. Being on top of him already had her off-kilter—it was a very intimate position when she was only in her underwear. And it wasn’t even sexy underwear. What if he wanted to look at her? “Yes, Sir. I’ll try.”
“That’s my good girl.” Rough palms smoothed over her shoulders, clever fingers finding the knots in her muscles. “All this soft, soft skin covering up so much tension. We’ll work out all these bumps, little one.”
Holy Mother of God. Bodie moaned tremulously, skin singing under his touch. He really did have the most magical hands. Pockets of pressure popped with sharp bursts of pain. The relief it brought outweighed any discomfort.
Her eyes fluttered shut.
“That’s it, there’s my girl. Just relax.” Those wonderful hands changed direction, skimming down her sides, over her ribs to her hips, then back up to rub slow, leisurely circles over her shoulders again. Firm pressure stroked down either side of her spine, fingers sticking to the contours of her body, all the way down to her butt. “I love this body, Bodie. Fits to mine just right.”
If by just right, he meant she was flush against him from breasts to crotch, he was on the money. Her skin liked the friction of his clothes scratching lightly over her, making everything sensitive and tingly. Under the guidance, she went limp.
“Fast learner,” he said approvingly with another slow pass of his hands down her back. “There’ll be times when this is as complex as submission gets, little one. When all I’ll ask of you is to trust me and relax, just this way.” He cupped her ass, kneading the flesh as she squirmed in mild protest. “Other times, my demands will be more taxing. I’ll ask you to surrender everything, Boadicea. When I claim a subbie, I take all of her.”
That sounded ominous. Before she could ask him to clarify that, his fingers parted her cheeks and a single threatening fingertip tapped on her bottom hole. A sharp squeak ripped from her throat as she hunched and clenched her ass. “No! Absolutely no fucking way!”
The crack of his hand on her bucking butt stilled her physical protests, the pain fleeting before warmth took its place and her insides sort of melted.
“Ass, mouth, and pussy are all mine.” Holy hell, he was using his patented Dom voice. The dark tone only added to the wetness just inches from his fingertips, turning the ache in her belly into a pulsing throb. “And mind your tongue, little one. I’m not adverse to profanity when warranted, but I won’t hesitate to paddle your backside if you curse me out or swear in a scene.”
“Damn right I’ll curse you out if you touch there again!”
“Then you’ll have a very red, very sore bottom to keep the anal plug I shove up your ass company. Punishment comes in many forms, little one; I like to use them all so naughty subbies stay on their best behavior.” He gave her cheeks a small pat, then gripped her hips. “Roll over, Boadicea.”
“Not on your life!”
He levelled her with a look, his eyebrow arching and giving him a devilish edge. Not that he needed an edge; he was potent enough. “Now, please.”
Yellow was on her tip of her tongue for all the wrong reasons.
You promised him you’d try, a mocking voice in her head sang. This isn’t trying, is it? This is succeeding at being what you’ve always been: a coward.
Rigid from head to toe, Bodie bit down on her tongue and fisted her hands. She was grateful for Braun’s help as she twisted around on top of him until her back laid on his chest, her legs straight between the vee of his. She jerked when his arms hugged around her waist, breath hitching uncertainly.
Her safety blanket tangled around her, baring skin.
Stubble scraped featherlight over her shoulder, followed by the sweet touch of his lips. “Not everything is what we expect, Bodie. The biggest demand I’ll make of you tonight is that you trust me. Give yourself into my hands and trust me to take care of you.”
Relax. Breathe. Don’t freak out again, for the love of all that’s holy.
“Good girl, that’s the way. Just relax and let me hold you, okay? Tomorrow’s soon enough to start confusing this tired brain with rules.” Braun boosted himself up the couch a bit more, releasing an arm to aid himself.
Bodie clung to the other one as his body rocked under her, a tiny lost boat on a dangerous sea, completely baffled as to what she should do. Muscles bunched and flexed beneath her, indicating the sheer power of the man, and she wondered if she’d finally lost her mind and bitten off more than she could chew.
When he was comfortable, she found herself tucked into him again, more on her side than her back, and his hands were just as attentive as before. Soothing, calming ragged nerves until she finally sagged onto him.
“You’re not touching my butt,” she murmured, firing one last stubborn shot.
Chapter Seven
At ten minutes to eight the next night, Braun kicked back in the seating pit with the Masters. Connie was noticeably tardy but had sent word with Loki that she may be up to an hour late due to work commitments.
The hot topic was, of course, last night’s Bodie hunt through the club; Jasper had voiced his displeasure several times already, and Braun promised he wouldn’t use the sadist as a fear tactic again. It wasn’t fair on either Jasper or Bodie, but it had been necessary.
Liam had also vocalized his unhappiness with the situation, not quite as forcefully as Jasper but strong enough Braun knew his friend was worried for Bodie. Especially as Braun had kept her hidden away in his office all night—they’d both fallen asleep on the couch, and it hadn’t been a hardship to wake this morning with an armful of sleeping subbie starfished on top of him, facedown.
“I still can’t believe she’s agreed to give this a go,” Liam muttered, sipping lemonade from a glass. Ice tinkled against the sides musically whenever he moved his arm. “You better look after her, Fitzpatrick, or that pretty face won’t be attracting the ladies anymore.”
Braun was pretty damn sure his days of subbie-searching were over if his heart had anything to say about the matter. There were steel cables wrapped around his feelings, leading back to his raven-haired sub. “Calm your jets, William. I’ve every intention of toning my dominant urges down for the time being. Until Boadicea acclimates to the lifestyle, I’ll treat her in the same manner I would any virgin subbie who comes here to explore. Firmly but fairly.”
Jasper hissed between his teeth. “Goddamn it, and I broke out my favorite cane as a welcoming present just for her. Fucking spoilsport.”
“I know, I know. What can I say, I’m getting soft in my old age. Once you hit the big four-zero, caning the sass out of a perky rear end just doesn’t hold the same appeal.” Braun deadpanned.
Loki crowed with laughter. “What a crock of bullshit. I’ve seen you reduce more than one subbie to grateful tears bent over the spanking horse, buddy. Just because you hit forty doesn’t mean the natural urges fade.” His face held a touch of uncertainty as he thought about it. “Does it?”
Atticus thumped him on the back. “Gullible as fuck, Loki. You never disappoint.”
“It’s a valid question!” Loki protested.
“We’ll be dominant ‘til the end of our days,” Jasper stepped in smoothly. “I for one plan to die with my cane in hand, listening to some sweet masochist cry while her welted ass rides my cock. That, boys, is how to die happy.”
While laughter filled the room, Braun checked his watch and frowned. His brand-new subbie was cutting her time down to the last minutes. They’d agreed she
would be by his side by eight p.m. and the seconds were ticking past without pause.
He glanced towards his office. If she wasn’t out when the clock hit eight, their dynamic would kick off on rocky ground. His plans for tonight didn’t involve a spanking for lateness, but they could be adjusted. He just hated to do it on their first night.
Ninety seconds.
C’mon, darlin’, you can do this.
They’d spoken before she disappeared into his office to change and she’d seemed quiet, reserved, but he considered it a point in his favor she’d actually shown up to the club. Her stage schedule was clear—he’d double-checked that. Her attention needed to be on him and only him tonight, not on whether she was supposed to be up there under the lights.
Her face reflected her thoughts when he’d explained what he would like her to do. There were some choice curse words in her eyes she’d done well not to spit at him, but the nerves he’d seen her trying to bury had held her tongue completely silent.
“Want me to go chase her down before I open the doors?” Liam asked him from the corner of his mouth. “Go give her a nudge? When she’s fearless, she’s unstoppable, but once doubts get under her skin, she can procrastinate with the champs.”
Braun just shook his head. “Leave her be. The choice has to be hers, Liam. If she walks in here of her own volition, she’ll be all the stronger for it.”
“I know. But she—”
“William,” he said a tad sharper than he meant. “Boadicea is an adult. She doesn’t need two Doms nannying over her; she has to focus on me. She’s not just your friend anymore and while she’s here, she’s a submissive who’s come to learn and enjoy herself. You’re not going to mollycoddle and confuse her.”
Liam ran his hand over his hair. “Goddamn you, Fitz.”
Back to Fitz, Braun thought. “As a Dominant, you know better than to interfere with another Dom’s submissive, Liam. I taught you better than that. Don’t make me order her to ignore you when she’s in my care.”
Dance for Me Page 12
