by Sandra Marie
Gavin sat there, staring at her, not a peep coming from his mouth. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Instead of not opening up enough, she did the opposite, completely drowning him in her baggage. She was surprised he hadn’t bolted out the door, leaving her in his dust.
“I have no idea why I told you all that,” she said, trying to at least end the awkward silence.
He took her hand and brought it to his lips, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “I’m happy you did.”
“Really? Because you didn’t say anything.”
“Honestly, I was taking it all in and realizing.” His eyes crashed into hers with an intensity that made her breath catch. “How incredibly brave you are.”
She shook her head, needing to put a stop to that train of thought immediately. “I’m not brave.”
“You are. You’re so brave you can’t even see it in yourself.”
“I had my grandparents. I was lucky, unlike so many other kids. Those are the kids who are brave. The kids that get bounced around from one foster home to the next.”
“Your situations are different, and yes you are lucky to have your grandparents, but some people let the trauma of their past define them. Not you.”
“I do though. I close myself off and won’t let anyone in.”
He turned in the seat to face her completely and gently pushed her hair behind her ear. She blinked up, meeting the deep green of his eyes. “You just let me in.”
A smile spread across her face. “I did, didn’t I?”
He nodded. “You did. I’m proud of you.”
She shrugged. “Thanks.” She pointed a finger at him. “But don’t expect that all the time.”
“I wouldn’t even think it.” He laughed.
“Now what about you?” she asked. “Any deep-rooted emotional baggage you want to share with the class?” He was quiet for a moment, and from the pucker of his cheek she could tell he was nibbling on the inside. His lips parted as his eyes met hers.
“Lauren Logan.”
His mouth snapped shut, and he turned away.
“Lauren Logan,” the nurse called from the door.
“Here!” Lauren said, holding her hand up. She looked at Gavin, mad that they didn’t get a chance to finish their conversation. “I’ll be back,” she said. “Don’t have too much fun without me.”
He got up from his chair and held his arm out. “I won’t, but at least let me help you to the door.”
She latched on and leaned her weight on him and they made their way to the nurse who was patiently waiting.
“Go get em’ Tiger,” he said as she hobbled away.
***
Gavin sat back down and tried to occupy his mind, but all he could think about was Lauren’s ankle. The swelling was ugly, and the guilt was eating at him. He reached into his pocket and took out his cell. He clicked into his contacts and scrolled to Ashton’s name. His finger hovered over the name. All he had to do was hit call, step outside, and have a conversation with his brother, it shouldn’t be so hard.
It was just money nothing more. But no matter how many times he repeated that thought, he knew it was a lie. It was so much more than money. It was admitting to failure, giving Ashton the pleasure of saying I told you so.
When Gavin had gone to Ashton a few months ago for the loan, Ashton had originally told him no and that he was saving Gavin from a life of debt. Saving. Like Gavin was some helpless dimwit who couldn’t do anything without his brother’s help. It had pissed him off and pushed him to the point of honesty. That honesty was what changed Ashton’s mind. Gavin had every intention of paying every single penny back with the added interest, if he didn’t pay it back in time of the parameters they’d set up. He was a man of his word, and he didn’t care if he paid that last cent back with his dying breath, he would pay it.
Gavin loved Ashton; he was his twin, partner in crime all through their childhood, but Gavin didn’t want to piggyback off of Ashton’s success. This bar was his way of carving his own path in the world, and he couldn’t even do that himself. How was he supposed to know that opening up a wall would open a pitfall full of problems?
He dropped his phone in his lap, ran his hands through his hair, tugging on the short ends before resting his hands on his knees. His legs shook with nervous energy.
Twenty minutes had passed, and Lauren still hadn’t come out. He hoped she didn’t have to get x-rays. That would just be the icing on the cake if it was more than a swollen ankle.
He couldn’t just sit there, so he got up and walked over to the window. The receptionist was an older woman with short salt and pepper hair. She glanced up at him over her red rimmed glasses. “How can I help you?” she asked.
“My friend is back there, and I wanted to pay her copay.”
“That’s very kind of you.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. He didn’t exactly have the extra funds, but he couldn’t have Lauren paying for something that was his fault. The least he could do was cover the cost of her appointment. He handed the woman his debit card and waited for her to finish the transaction.
She handed it back and gave him the receipt. “Thanks,” he said and was about to head back to his seat, but the door opened, and Lauren came out on crutches.
His eyes widened, heart stuttering to a stop. “Please tell me it’s not broken,” he said.
Long lashes blinked up at him. “Not broken, just really swollen. The doctor said I should keep weight off of it for a few days, continue to ice it, and he gave me this,” she said, holding up a small piece of paper.
“Paper how nice of him.”
“It’s a prescription for pain meds, you dope.” She smiled, then her eyes cast down. “I doubt I’ll fill it though.”
“Why not? If it’ll help with the pain.”
“I told you about my parents.” She glanced up. “I don’t want to ever wind up like them.”
Gavin took the script from her hand. “That’ll never happen.”
“Addiction clearly runs in my blood.”
“Why don’t we get you home. You can see how bad the pain is and decide then.”
“I’d like that.”
“Good let’s get out of here.”
“I have to pay first.” She turned on her crutches. “I’ll just be a sec.”
“It’s already taken care of.”
She turned around, upper body, resting on the crutched. “What do you mean it’s taken care of?”
“I took care of it.” He held his hand up. “And before you get your panties in a bunch, I get it, but I’m the reason you’re here, so just let me have this one.”
“My panties are not in a bunch.”
“I think they are.”
“Maybe if I was wearing some,” she said, leaving him with his mouth open as she swung herself past him on her crutches.
“Do you need anything else?” Gavin asked as he stood at the head of her bed. He already went to the pharmacy and filled her prescription just in case, got her extra blankets from the hall closet, propped her foot on top of a pillow, stacked a pile of books on her nightstand, made sure her Kindle and cell phone were fully charged, and made her a hot cop of apple cinnamon tea.
“I’m good,” she said, unable to prevent the smile spreading wide across her face. “I’ve been good since you made me brunch in bed.” He only microwaved a prepackaged egg sandwich Olivia had bought, but it was the thought that counted, and there was definitely a lot of thought behind it. “You should go.”
“I feel bad leaving you here alone.”
“It’ll only be for a few hours before Ashlynn gets home, and Ginny is right across the street if I need her. I’ll send her a text.”
“I’ll take care of it. I’ll stop over there when I head out.”
“I let you help me with a few things, and now you’re taking over,” she said with a laugh.
“Only while you’re down for the count.”
He walked over to her and be
nt down, giving her a sweet kiss. “Text me if you need anything.”
“And what? You’re going to close the bar up and come over here?” She fluttered her eyelashes. “I’ll be fine.”
“If I have to close my bar, I will.”
“It’s just a swollen ankle, Gavin.” She hated to see the concern that had been tightening the skin around his eyes from the moment he arrived that morning. She wanted to kiss it away and watch him relax back into the laidback guy she knew.
“I’ll call you later.” He turned to walk away, and Lauren grabbed his hand. He looked back at her, his eyebrows drawn together.
“It’s not your fault, okay? So stop blaming yourself.”
“I’m not,” he said, but it was a pathetic attempt at a lie.
“You are, and you’re making me feel guilty about it, so stop. It wasn’t your fault. I should’ve been paying attention because I knew that area was under construction. It was a stupid accident because of my own carelessness.”
“What if you fell and hit your head?”
“I didn’t. I twisted my ankle. The doctor said I’ll be fine in a week.”
“It shouldn’t have happened.”
His eyes lingered on their fingers as she laced them together. “Stop being stubborn and look at me,” she said.
“I thought we established you’re the stubborn one.” He lifted his gaze; that sparkle she loved was back, even if for only a second before it dulled again.
“It appears you can be just as stubborn.”
“I don’t like seeing you in pain.”
“And I don’t like seeing you looking like someone stole your puppy.”
“What kind of monster would steal a puppy?” His stoic resolve cracked and he smiled.
She poked at his side. “Was that a smile?”
He tried to cover it with his hand but started laughing.
“Are you laughing?” she asked.
“What can I say? I’ve been making myself laugh since the nineties.”
“Okay, old man.”
He gasped, holding a hand against his chest. “Old man? That’s hurtful.”
“They say the truth hurts sometimes.”
“I didn’t realize you had an evil side.”
“Stick around. There’s a lot you don’t know.”
He looked at the clock on her nightstand. “Crap. I really have to go. You sure you don’t need anything else?”
“Positive! Now go. Please.”
“Enjoy your book,” he said, kissed her forehead, and took off.
Lauren settled into the soft warmth of the pillow fort Gavin made around her and picked up her newest read, a dystopian with a kickass female lead. After spending so much time in reality, she was ready to slip back into the world of fiction.
Though as she started reading, she couldn’t help but picture herself as the female main character and Gavin as the romantic lead. Mixing reality with fiction had never been so fun.
***
Gavin hurried across the street and knocked on Ginny’s door. A round of barking greeted him, and Ginny appeared a few seconds later. She ordered the dogs back as she flipped her hair into place and slipped out the door. She pulled it shut behind her, the sound of nails scratching on the wood.
“Hey, Gavin,” she said. “W…What are you doing here?”
“Sorry to bother you.”
“No, no bother.”
He tossed a thumb over his shoulder. “I was at Lauren’s. She hurt her ankle, and the doctor told her to keep off of it. I have to head to the bar, and I feel bad leaving her alone, so I was hoping you can check on her in an hour or so.”
“Absolutely. Is she okay?”
“She will be. She took a tumble last night at the bar. Tripped on a piece of metal sticking out of the floor and twisted her ankle pretty good.”
“Oh no!” Ginny’s hand landed on her open mouth, making Gavin feel even worse than he already did.
“I would stay, but I have to open the bar,” he said, feeling like he needed to justify why he was leaving her alone and injured.
“Of course and I’m sure Lauren wants you to. She’s not exactly the type that likes to be fussed over.”
That was the understatement of the year. “You’re telling me. She fought me all day from the car to the doctor’s office to the pharmacy and back.”
“Y…you went to the doctor with her?” Ginny asked, tucking a green strand of hair behind her ear.
“I didn’t exactly give her a choice.”
Ginny smiled. “Good.”
His eyebrow arched in curiosity. “Good?”
“When she had the flu, she wouldn’t let me or Dylan take her to the doctor. She went by herself.”
What kind of dip shit would let their girlfriend get behind the wheel when they were battling the flu? Did he even try? Gavin wouldn’t only have refused, he would have made sure she had everything she needed.
“Explains why he’s not around anymore,” Gavin said.
“One of the reasons.”
“What were the others?” Gavin knew he shouldn’t ask, it was none of his business, but he couldn’t help himself. Lauren was a complex woman that he really liked, and he wanted to understand her better.
“It was like a whole bunch of little things that accumulated into the simple fact that they didn’t belong together. I saw you two at the bar, and she never looked up long enough from her book to look at Dylan the way she looked at you.” Ginny shrugged. “But y…you d…didn’t hear that from me.”
Gavin held his hand over his heart. “Your secret is safe with me.” Gavin glanced up and spotted three dogs in the window, fighting for prime view.
“Your dogs are waiting for you,” Gavin said. “I won’t keep you any longer.” He stepped back. “Thanks Ginny.”
She smiled. “You’re welcome.”
Gavin got in his car and looked at Lauren’s house. His lips quirked as he remembered standing in front of her bent over while she stubbornly stood in the doorway. She had been so cranky this morning.
He had a feeling that hiding who she truly was had become her own personal crutch, and he loved that she didn’t hide her true colors from him.
Happy or cranky, he would take her anyway he could get her.
He put his car in reverse and reluctantly headed back to the bar.
It was another quiet night with a handful of customers, and Gavin was starting to worry about making enough money to keep the place afloat. He had a few customers in but nowhere near the capacity he needed to pay all the bills. He needed to think of something and fast, or he’d be either closing up shop or asking Ashton for help.
“I’ll take one more,” Devin said, and Gavin grabbed his empty glass to refill it. He turned to the taps and pulled down on the pilsner, filling it to the brim. He pushed the glass across the bar and went to the register.
“Gavin Alexander Mills!” Lily May’s voice boomed across the bar.
Gavin flopped his rag over his shoulder and turned to the door along with every other pair of eyes in the bar.
Lily May was wrapped in a green corset covered in ivy leaves and a matching pair of the tiniest green shorts—if you could even call them shorts—and a bright red wig that matched her lipstick fell in curls down her back. Leaves replaced her eyebrows, framing her blue eyes, while green tights with twisting ivy covered her legs. The ivy continued in a single vine around her arm. She stood tall in green high heels, her hand planted firmly on her hip.
“Hey!” Gavin yelled at the men who were drooling at her. She and Ashton had only been dating a couple months, but he’d already considered her like a sister, and he would not hesitate to defend her honor if it came to that. “Divert your eyes, boys,” he said, and the sound of butts turning on stools and chairs interrupted the silence.
Gavin pointed a finger and twirled it at Lily May. “Spend your day being one with the trees or something? I know you miss North Carolina but this is a bit much.”
“If you
don't stop talking, I'll tear your arm off and beat you to death with the bloody stump.”
His lips pressed into a thin line, trying to control his laughter. “Violent.”
“I am madder than a wet hen, and I don’t need you trying to be funny.”
“What’d I do?”
“What’d you do? Poor Lauren is hobbling around because she hurt herself in your bar!”
Gavin waved his hand to Lily May to quiet her down; he didn’t need his customers to hear about an injury in his bar. He didn’t want them getting any ideas.
“I know,” he said. “And I feel really guilty about it. I went with her to the doctor to make sure everything was okay and paid her copays.”
“And have you talked to your brother yet?”
“No.”
“Why the heck not?”
Gavin went to speak, but the words stuttered on his tongue because he didn’t have a rebuttal. He had no reason other than his pride standing in his way like it always did. “Haven’t gotten around to it.”
“Oh heaven’s to Betsy! That is the saddest excuse I have ever heard, and I have heard some pretty pathetic ones in my day. You either talk with him today, or I will.”
He could stand here and argue with Lily May until he was blue in the face, but she wouldn’t budge, and she shouldn’t have to. Gavin was being an idiot, and he needed to get over himself and do the right thing for him, for the bar, and for Lauren. If he would have spoken to Ashton in the first place, she never would’ve gotten hurt. The only person to blame was himself.
