“Brittany is pregnant. I’ll take care of my responsibilities.”
“Which sounds great, but how? We’ll ignore the fact that after Hawk finds out, he’s going to kill you.”
Raoul shifted on the bed. “Coach won’t be happy.”
“You think? So assuming you make it out of that conversation alive, then what?”
“I get a scholarship and play football.”
If only it were going to be that simple. “What if that goes badly? You blow out a shoulder or a knee? You take a bad hit and you’re out for the season, or worse, permanently. Then what?”
“Then I’ll get a job and support Brittany and the baby.”
“Doing what?” She held up a hand. “Raoul, I know this all seems possible and you can make it work, but it’s not the only option. Doing the right thing doesn’t mean putting your future in danger. Brittany is convinced everything is going to work out perfectly, but you and I live in the real world. We know things can go wrong. There are countless wonderful couples out there who are emotionally and financially prepared to have children.”
“I’m not giving my baby away.”
As soon as he spoke, she realized what she’d said. He was a boy who had never had a home. He would never willingly turn his back on any family he had.
“Of course. I’m sorry. I should have realized.”
That for him, there were no other options. Raoul wasn’t that upset about the baby because to him it meant finally belonging. He wouldn’t lose Brittany or the baby, or so he thought.
“I’m sure everything will work out,” she said.
“You’re not sure. You think it’s a mistake.”
She stood. “Maybe, but what I think doesn’t matter. You know she’s not mature enough to handle this well, right?”
He hesitated, then nodded slowly. “I know, but I am. We’re going to be a family.”
Which in the end was what mattered.
She left him and went into her room and closed the door. It was only then that she realized yet another woman in her world was pregnant. Claire, Jesse, the dog and now Brittany. It seemed like everyone was having a baby but her.
“JUST BE GRATEFUL my ex-husband was totally inept,” Nicole muttered as she finished tying Raoul’s tie. “So I learned how to do this sort of thing.” She adjusted it, then stepped back so he could look at himself in the mirror. “I’m one of three girls. This was not supposed to be in my life-skill set.”
“Thank you.” He smoothed the front of his shirt. “Do I look okay? I feel stupid.”
“You look good. Very GQ.”
Hawk had taken him shopping the previous day after school and bought him slacks, a couple of dress shirts and a sport coat. The items would be getting a lot of use during the next few weeks as college recruiters came calling.
Now Raoul looked uneasy in his new clothes. “I don’t know,” he muttered.
“Hey, listen up. Who’s the best?”
“What?”
“This is a pep talk. Who’s the best?”
“I am.”
He grumbled the words more than spoke them.
She put her hands on her hips. “Excuse me? I want a little enthusiasm or I’m not going.”
His eyes widened. “You have to go. I’m not walking into that restaurant all alone. I won’t know what to say. Look, Nicole, I’m just some kid. I’ve never been anywhere or done anything. I’m not like you. You know, sophisticated.”
If he hadn’t been so sincere, she would have laughed. Her? Sophisticated? Surely he meant her world-traveling, piano-playing sister. Claire had been all over the world. Nicole’s claim to fame was a trip to New York several years ago. They’d seen The Lion King on Broadway, which was just so sophisticated.
“You’re going to do fine because you’re the one being courted. The colleges all want you to lead their winning teams. You’re going to have your pick. They know it and you need to know it. Let him do all the talking. If the conversation stalls, Hawk or I will pick up the slack. You’re the talent. For the night, just pretend you’re Lance Armstrong.”
“He’s a cyclist.”
“Then insert the name of your favorite pro football player into the sentence. You’re the man. Now let’s get going. There’s going to be traffic. You can spend the drive telling me how pretty I look. I’ll find it relaxing and you’ll be distracted.”
Raoul laughed, which was good. Things had been a little strained between them for the past couple of days. Ever since she’d found out that Brittany was pregnant. As she hadn’t heard a giant primal scream coming from the west, she assumed Hawk didn’t know yet. She wasn’t looking forward to that conversation.
BUCHANAN’S was an elegant steak house near the downtown shopping district. The food was excellent, the portions generous and they were practically revered for their wine list. Not that Nicole was going to get much wine that night. Not only did she have to worry about driving home, but the whole point was to pay attention so Raoul found out as much as possible so he could make a smart decision when it came to his college selection.
She used the valet to park her car, then walked into the restaurant with Raoul. Hawk was already by the reception desk, talking to a middle-aged man in a great suit.
Nicole hadn’t expected to feel anything but the normal tingles when she saw him, so she was left practically gasping when a wave of emotion swept through her. This wasn’t about sex, although she wouldn’t say no to that, but the feelings were so much bigger.
What was wrong with her? Did she have a fever? Had she eaten one too many cupcakes at work? Did she need to start exercising? Well, maybe not that. But what?
Before she could decide, Hawk looked up and saw her. He smiled, a big, wide smile that made her thighs start to tremble.
“Here they are. Walt, this is the star player I was telling you about.”
Hawk introduced everyone, using the title of “friend of the family” to describe her. They all shook hands and were quickly shown to a quiet booth on the side of the restaurant.
Walt launched into a speech about the college. “We take our football very seriously,” he said, smiling at Raoul. “You’re a talented quarterback and that’s the position we’re most focused on this year. Our college is in a small town where everyone supports our team. You won’t be able to walk around at the local Dairy Queen without someone wanting to tell you what a good job you’re doing. You ever lived in a small town, Raoul?”
“I’ve been in Seattle all my life.”
Walt leaned toward him. “There’s nothing like it. We all look out for each other. It’s like one big family. Personal relationships matter and you can’t get that in a big city. Let me tell you a little bit about our football program.”
By the time dinner was over, Nicole found herself wanting to move more than halfway across the country to live in the beautiful campus housing. Walt made it all sound perfect.
His presentation was impressive. In addition to the usual brochures, he had a mini movie he played on a DVD player. He bought everyone the most expensive steak on the menu, kept them laughing with funny jokes and charmed with just enough sincerity to keep Nicole from getting suspicious.
She tuned out the talk on team building. The number of backs or halfbacks or whatever-backs wasn’t her thing. What she did get was that this could be a very difficult decision.
When dinner was finished, Walt shook hands with them all and returned to the hotel. Hawk patted Raoul on the shoulder. “We’ll talk about this more tomorrow. Why don’t you wait in the restaurant so I can say good-night to my girl.”
Raoul smiled and stepped back inside.
“You two seemed to have made up,” Nicole said, figuring that was a safer topic than addressing the “my girl” part of the statement.
“We have an understanding,” Hawk told her, pulling her close to the building, then kissing her.
“Does this mean my curfew got extended?”
“Not exactly.”
; That made her laugh. “He’s still willing to take you on, huh?”
“Let’s say I’m not pushing it. You’re right. He’s a good kid. I respect that.”
Nicole was suddenly fighting against a crushing tide of guilt. Brittany hadn’t told Hawk about the baby. When she did, it would change everything, especially Hawk’s relationship with his star player.
Should she tell him now? Give him some kind of warning? Was it her place? Her business?
She was torn. Not only had she promised Raoul and Brittany that she would keep the information quiet, Hawk had made it clear that he was the experienced parent while she was just a pretender. It had pissed her off at the time and it was kind of making her want to keep quiet now.
Was that bad? She was willing to accept immature, but bad was different.
Before she could decide, he said, “Thanks for coming tonight. Having a family member along keeps these things more low-key.”
“I’m not exactly a family member.”
“You’re the closest he has.”
Which was really sad. “I care about him. He has to make a tough decision. It’s going to change his life forever. Whatever he decides, he shouldn’t have to do it alone.”
Hawk tucked her hair behind her ears, then touched her cheek. “You’re amazing. You took him in, you’re looking out for him. How many people would do that?”
She felt embarrassed. “It’s not that big a deal. It just sort of happened.”
“To you. I meant what I said before.”
She had no idea what he was talking about. “When?”
“At your place. I’m done with the deal. I want us to date because we want to date. Not to prove anything. I want to be with you, Nicole.”
Her heart pounded so loudly, she wouldn’t have been able to hear him if he’d kept talking. Hope and need and happiness bubbled up inside of her.
“I’d like that, too,” she said, hoping she didn’t sound as eager as she felt.
He smiled, then kissed her. “So we’re dating.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Exclusively.”
That made her laugh. “Yes, which means no dates for you with football moms.”
“Not a problem. You’re the one that I want.”
Magic words, she thought with a sigh. Amazing words.
He kissed her again, his mouth pressing against hers as he claimed her with his tongue. She yielded to him, wanting more, needing him as much as she needed to breathe. Then a car drove by and she was aware of where they were and how late it was.
She pulled back. “I need to get Raoul home.”
“Brittany’s waiting for me. But I’ll see you soon.”
It sounded a whole lot more like a statement than a question, which she liked.
He stuck his head in the restaurant and motioned for Raoul. Together they walked to the valet, who quickly collected their cars. Hawk held her door open.
“I’ll give you a call tomorrow.”
“I’d like that.”
She drove home, doing her best not to spontaneously giggle with delight.
NICOLE DUMPED the spaghetti into the serving bowl and Raoul carried it over to the table.
“How many more recruiting dinners do you have lined up?” she asked as she opened the refrigerator and pulled out the salad.
“Three, including UCLA and Ohio.”
“Good schools. I don’t know how you’re going to decide.”
It was like teenage-boy heaven. All these colleges wanting to sign him. They had great organizations, offered an outstanding education and as many perks as the rules would allow. How was he supposed to figure out which one was the best?
“I’m making a chart,” Raoul told her as he poured himself a giant glass of milk. “Coach said that was a good place to start. Make a list of all the things that are important to me and rank the school that way. Like they do with cars in Car and Driver.”
“My favorite magazine,” she teased.
“I’ll show it to you.”
“Promises like that shouldn’t be made lightly.”
He grinned. “I want to be at a school where they’re going to play me. Time on the field is everything.”
Because it was hard to impress anyone from the bench. “Got that. But you also need a team with depth.”
He raised his eyebrows.
“I’ve been doing some reading,” she admitted. “I can see we’re going to be on this topic for a while, so I want to be informed.”
“Impressive.”
“I know.”
“Brittany’s making a chart, too. What she likes about the schools and doesn’t like.”
Nicole’s good mood popped like a punctured balloon. Brittany’s input shouldn’t matter, but there was no point in saying that. Raoul wouldn’t listen.
“When are you going to tell Hawk?” she asked. “He needs to know. I was okay keeping your secret before, but it’s starting to bother me.”
The need for him to know had gotten worse after he’d talked to her about dating for real. Now she felt as if she were keeping secrets from someone she was supposed to be loyal to.
“Soon.”
“According to Brittany, this is all total happiness, so why wait?”
Raoul looked at her. “I know you don’t agree with what we’re doing, but our minds are made up. Brittany and I are going to have a baby. That means we’ll be together.”
“I know. You keep telling me.”
“But you’re mad.”
“I’m not mad. I’m disappointed. Raoul, you’re both so young. I know it seems like everything is going to be fine, but what if it isn’t? You don’t have a backup plan.”
“I love her, Nicole. Love doesn’t come with backup plans or guarantees. You have to take it on faith. I want to be with her. I want to see her smile every day. I want to hear her voice and have her tell me what I’ve done to make her happy. I want to go to sleep, feeling her heart beating against mine. I want her to be the mother of my children. I want to experience everything in life, with her, because being with her is the best part of my day.”
It was an amazing speech, Nicole thought, stunned both by the words and the emotion behind them. At that moment Raoul wasn’t a teenager or some kid who needed a place to stay. He was a man in love with a woman.
“Okay,” she said quietly. “I get it. I’ll stop pushing.”
Probably because what he’d said had made her realize something about herself. She, too, was in love with someone amazing. A caring, sexy man who made her heart beat faster every time he was around. A smart, funny guy who made her want to believe in possibilities and hope and love. A man who might still be in love with his late wife, whose daughter was pregnant and from whom she’d been keeping a really big secret.
Lucky, lucky her.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
HAWK SCROLLED through the Web site. He wanted to plan a weekend away with Nicole after football season ended.
Somewhere nice, he thought, checking out different hotels. But he didn’t want to spend the whole time driving. He had other things on his mind. Maybe Portland. It was only three hours away and there were plenty of good restaurants. Or they could head down to the Oregon wine country and do some tasting.
In the other direction, there was Bellingham, close to the Canadian border. He’d heard one of the teachers talking about a small hotel with a spa. Now he wasn’t into the whole mud wrap, massage thing, but Nicole might be and he wanted to make her happy.
San Francisco was only a couple of hours away by plane. Still, there was wait time at the airport, time he could spend with Nicole in bed.
“Daddy, can I talk to you?”
“Hmmm? Sure.” Hawk motioned his daughter into his study but didn’t turn his attention away from the computer.
Should he ask Nicole first or surprise her? He wanted the trip to be a surprise, but women didn’t always take that sort of thing really well. She might need to make special arrangements. Raoul could take care o
f himself and the dog, but what about Nicole’s business? Yeah, he would have to tell her.
What if he could find a place with a private hot tub? Now that was some quality time he could get behind.
“Daddy, are you listening?”
“What? Sure, honey. Go on.”
He forced his attention away from the computer and looked at his daughter. Brittany stood in the doorway to his office.
“Like I was saying, I’ve been thinking a lot about Mom and what you two went through.”
What? When? “Uh-huh.”
“You had a very special relationship,” Brittany continued.
He still had no idea what this was all about. “We both loved you a lot. You know that, right?”
“Sure. I’ve always felt special, Daddy. Like I’m a part of something really important.”
“Good.” His attention strayed back to the screen.
“That’s why I’m excited about following in your footsteps.”
Footsteps? He clicked on a link.
“You know. With the baby and all.”
Baby?
Hawk’s gaze narrowed down to a single point of light. He heard a rushing sound, followed by the thundering of his heart. It was as if he suddenly weighed ten thousand pounds. He could barely move his head. He managed to turn so he could see his daughter.
“Baby?”
She paused, then licked her lips. “Uh-huh.” Her smile trembled at the corners. “Are you excited? I’m excited, Daddy, and Raoul is, too. Now let me explain. We’re going to be fine. We have it all worked out. We’ll do what you and Mom did. Raoul will get a full scholarship to college and I’ll move there, too. It’ll be great. I’m excited about being a mom. A little scared, but excited. Raoul’s really happy. And he’s going to pick a good school. One I’ll like, too.”
Hawk heard the words, at least he thought he did. But none of them made sense. Was it a language thing? Had she suddenly started speaking Polish or something?
“You’re pregnant?” he demanded, slowly rising to his feet, feeling the heat of anger matched only by his sense of betrayal.
Sweet Spot Page 19
