by Rye Brewer
“Danger from who?” he asked.
“From Lucian. I know, it’s a lot to believe at once, but it’s the truth. He’s been screwing with our family for years. He was the one who turned Mom, thinking he could force her to be with him instead of with us. He didn’t know she would turne us, too. He did it out of spite for Dad. Like I said, it’s a long story, and we don’t have a lot of time.”
“Why couldn’t he tell us?” He looked at Fane. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“It would’ve only made things dangerous for you. If you knew, and he found out you knew, he would stop at nothing to find out where we were. I couldn’t let that happen, knowing he would torture you to get the information he wanted.”
“What about Mom?” He looked at each of us in turn. “Where is she?”
Fane spoke up. “That’s another story, and why I brought all of you here.”
“Where is she?” Scott asked again, like he hadn’t heard what Fane said.
“We saw her,” I murmured. “Not her, really. There was another being in her body. I know, I know,” I said when it was clear he was about to ask another several hundred questions, “it’s beyond anything we’ve ever encountered before. I know. But that’s how it is. And it was a big shock.”
“It was horrifying. Disgusting.” Philippa shivered. “It was her body and her face, but it wasn’t her. You’re lucky you didn’t have to see it.”
“I disagree,” Scott said. “You got to see her, at least.”
“You can’t unsee what we saw, or un-hear what we heard,” Gage murmured. “If I slept, I would probably have nightmares about her. It was an abomination to her memory, Scott. You didn’t miss anything.”
Scott snorted. “I missed a lot. I missed a whole lot.”
I wondered if he would ever be able to forgive us.
“While we’re on the subject of your mother,” Fane interjected, “she’s the reason I called you all together.”
“What about her?” Philippa asked.
I heard hope in her voice and it just about crushed me. She wanted so much for Mom to be Mom. Well, we all did, didn’t we?
“I have to find her.” He looked at all of us, his children. “I have to find your mother’s body. We all deserve answers as to how Nivia ended up in there.”
“Nivia?” Scott asked.
“The being inhabiting Elena’s body,” Fane said. “As far as I knew, your mother died. That’s the belief I’ve had to live with for all these years. Now, I find out that another being has inhabited her. I need to know how, and why, and what happened to your mother—your actual mother—during all of this. Is she gone, or inside the body? Is Nivia too strong to let her out? These are all questions that must be answered. We need to know.”
“I’ll go with you,” Philippa said, taking a step forward.
“Not so fast,” Fane said, and I thought I saw a shadow of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He had always admired her spirit, even when she frustrated him. Daddy’s Girl. “I think we’ve already learned that it’s unwise to run straight into an unknown situation. We need to have a plan in place.”
“This is Mom we’re talking about,” Scott argued, and his voice was stronger. Indignation was taking the place of shock. “We don’t have the time to stand around here in this place, wherever we are, and come up with a plan. I’ve already been left out of enough. I want us to go after her, and I want to be caught up on all of this.”
“Scott.” Fane’s voice was sharp, cutting through the confusion.
Scott’s mouth snapped shut. Dad could always do that—he always had the sort of strength and presence that made it possible for him to command an entire room. His children were no challenge. “I understand what you’re going through. I do. I’ve had to live for years in-between worlds, never being myself again, always having to live as Fane.”
“You’re Fane?”
“Oh, no.” Philippa rolled her eyes. “I forgot he didn’t know that, either.”
I stepped in. “Yes, he’s Fane. And this is not to be discussed outside of us. Not Fane and not our father. Can we move on?” I looked at Fane and nodded.
“As I was saying,” he continued with a doleful look at Scott, “all along, I’ve blamed myself for her death. I’ve blamed myself for so many things. For earning Lucian’s hatred, for bringing all of this on us. I hated myself for not being able to save her from dying. And now, there’s a chance she’s not actually dead. Trust me, none of you wants to understand what happened more than you do.”
That was enough to shut Scott up, but it didn’t do much for my peace of mind. I caught a glimpse of movement in the shadows and turned in that direction.
A flash of long hair, a white cloak.
Sirene.
Even as my hackles raised at the sight of her, I couldn’t help but wonder how it made her feel to hear that Fane wanted to know what happened to his wife.
Sirene’s eyes met mine, and her face was like a mask. It didn’t reveal anything, but I understood.
She disappeared then, back into the shadows.
31
JONAH
“What does all of this mean? Are we going out to find Mom or what?” Scott looked around.
“Aren’t you more worried about your girlfriend?” Philippa whispered.
“Not right now, Philippa.” He glared at her.
“It doesn’t matter what any of you are more worried about, because I’m going on my own. This was not intended to be a family trip. I only wanted to let you know what my intentions are, so you’ll know where I am and what I’m doing.”
“That doesn’t seem fair,” Gage said. “I don’t like the idea of you going out all alone to handle this.”
“I don’t remember asking you if you thought it was fair,” Fane reminded him. “And the last time I checked, I’m the…”
“You’re the what?” he asked. “The father? You set the rules? I thought you were Fane. I thought you weren’t our father anymore. You should make up your mind about that.”
“Stop it,” I said, raising my voice. Even though I did, it still sounded muffled. The sound hardly carried at all, like I was yelling in the middle of a padded room. “We won’t get anywhere this way.”
“Your brother is right,” Fane said, still looking at Gage. “If we keep sniping at each other, we’ll fall even further apart. We need to come together at a time like this. We need all our strength, and we have to trust each other.” I bit my tongue on hearing that. I couldn’t help but remember how Gage had destroyed every bit of trust I ever had in him.
“Anyway,” Philippa said, looking at Scott, “Sara’s with Anissa. Remember? She’s not out there alone, so maybe it’s time to think about our family and our clan and less about theirs for a little while.”
“She’s not just with Anissa,” I said. “She’s probably with their mother.”
“What?” Fane looked stunned, and it took a lot to get that sort of reaction from him. “Did you say their mother?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Tabitha? Tabitha died in the Great Fire. I should know. I mean, wasn’t I accused of setting it?”
Scott’s sharp intake of breath revealed his reaction to remembering that bit of information. Maybe he would finally figure out that this wasn’t a joke, that Dad and Mom fled for a good reason.
“It’s a long story,” I said. I felt like a broken record, repeating the same platitudes over and over.
“I have time,” Fane replied.
“Maybe we don’t.”
“Talk,” he ordered. “Please.”
I sighed. “A Shade saved her. She made it through the fire and found where the Shades live, and one of them took her in. She was near death, from what I understand. It took years for her to fully heal.”
He took this in, then asked, “Where did you hear this?”
“A Custodian told me the entire story. He told Anissa, too.”
“That’s impossible.”
“It’s n
ot impossible,” I assured him. “The Custodian in question is Anissa’s and Sara’s brother.”
“Their brother? They have a brother?” he asked.
“Yes. Half-vampire, half-Shade. Didn’t you pick up on it when we were all together?”
“What?” he asked.
“It’s Allonic.” For once, I knew something he didn’t know. I felt a little smug about it.
“Allonic. I had no idea.”
“I wasn’t aware you knew Allonic,” Philippa said.
“I wouldn’t say I know him, but I’m familiar with him. We’ve crossed paths many times—you would be surprised how easy it is for those of our kind to cross paths. Maybe it’s fate. Who knows?” He turned to me. “I didn’t know he was half-vampire.”
“Yes. He has fangs, but he doesn’t drink blood. Well… not usually.” I vaguely remembered him drinking Valerius’s blood back in Sorrowswatch, but everything from that experience was so fuzzy and foggy, it was hard to make sense of much of it. Almost dying would do that, I guessed.
“I never know she was his mother,” Fane murmured. “I never bothered to ask who his mother was. We don’t know each other that well.” He turned to Scott. “Your Sara must be fine, then, if she’s with her mother. Tabitha wouldn’t let harm come to her children.”
Scott’s forehead creased, and his mouth curved into a smirk. “I can’t say I agree with that.” But, to his credit, he didn’t argue, either.
“Regardless of everything we’ve discussed, or how important it is for you to know where your mother is and what happened to her, there’s clan business for you to attend to. You can’t keep running off on these expeditions. I’ll be doing this alone. It’s better this way, and safer for all of you.”
“I don’t think so,” Philippa argued.
“I do. Remember, this entire time I’ve been gone, I’ve gotten used to being alone. I know how to handle whatever comes at me.”
“Yes. You’re legendary,” Scott said.
“Something like that.” Fane replied, shaking his head.
“What about your other woman? How does she feel about this?” I couldn’t help myself. I had to know.
“Wait. What? What other woman?” Scott asked. “You have another woman?”
“Tell him,” I said. “Tell him about the happy new arrival that’s on its way.”
“Jonah. This isn’t like you,” Fane murmured.
“How would you know anymore? It’s been how long since you left? Besides, you know how I feel about this. I didn’t lie when I first found out.”
His face settled into hard lines. “Your brother is referring to Sirene.”
“Who’s that?” Scott asked.
“A witch,” I whispered, still looking at Fane. “The witch who’s carrying his child.”
“This doesn’t concern you, and I’m not discussing it with you,” Fane snarled.
“I don’t get this.” Scott looked around, almost laughing. “You’re telling me we have a sibling and it doesn’t concern us? How can you say that?”
“I agree with Scott,” Gage said.
“So do I,” Philippa added. “I think this is something else we need to clarify. There are too many secrets. I’m sick of them.”
She wrapped her arms around herself, and I saw for the first time that she was shaking.
I put an arm around her shoulders.
She continued, “I wish we could just go back to the way things were before, but I know that isn’t possible. And that’s fine. We can’t turn back time. But we can start being a little more open with each other, a little more honest. We need to stick together. There are too many pieces in play right now for us to hold back from each other. Don’t you get it? We’re all on the same team. Aren’t we?”
Her question hung in the air.
I didn’t know how to answer it or even whether or not I could. I had the feeling she directed it to Fane.
“Of course,” he finally said, his shoulders falling. “We’re all on the same team. All I ask is that you remember something: if there are secrets, if I’m keeping something from you, there’s always a good reason. Just like you didn’t know why your mother and I left. We did it for the right reasons, and it tore us apart inside. I mean that. We didn’t do it willingly, but it was the only way. This is the same sort of situation—perhaps not as dire, but just as important. It’s best that I keep certain things to myself for now. Not because I don’t think you deserve to know about your sibling, but because it’s for the best.”
“Says who?” Gage asked.
“Says me.” And that was the final word on the subject. He always had a way of making his point known in very few words. He looked around as if he was daring any of us to challenge him again. None of us did.
“Fine. That’s how it is, then.” I spoke for all of us.
They must have agreed, because they didn’t counter my decision.
“It’s time for all of you to go home,” Fane announced. “Come on. I’ll walk you back to the portal.”
I couldn’t help thinking that so much was left unsaid. Too much. I didn’t like that feeling. We all dragged our feet going back to the portal—none of us wanted to leave things the way they were. Even so, I couldn’t help but reflect on the fact that we were all together. Finally, after so long. We were together.
Except for Mom. Her presence, or lack thereof, was deeply missed. She was always the lightness, the brightness, the breath of life in our family. She had always kept us laughing. And when we found ourselves in tense, tight situations, she was the one who held us together like glue. We needed her. I wondered if we would ever get her back. I told myself we wouldn’t—it was reasonable, of course. I couldn’t get my hopes up. Still, Fane’s presence gave me a reason to hope.
We reached the portal and stopped. None of us wanted to be the first ones to go through. We were all just as reluctant as the rest. Fane cleared his throat. “All right. Go back and take care of the clan, the way you have been all this time. They need you.”
Gage nodded and squared his shoulders before striding through the portal and disappearing.
Philippa looked at Fane once more—her mouth opened, the snapped shut. She followed Gage with her head hanging low.
“I still don’t understand any of this,” Scott said.
“I know.” Fane sighed. “I’m sorry.”
Seconds later, Scott was gone, too.
Fane looked at me. “I’ll get word to you as soon as I have something.”
“All right. You know where to find me.”
He smiled a little, and I decided that was as good a way as any to leave him.
Just like that, I was back on the roof. I wondered if I would ever get used to traveling via portal.
The rest of my siblings were there, looking at me.
Judging from the expression of shock on Scott’s face, I had the feeling it was going to be a long night.
32
ANISSA
Funny. I was angry with Jonah. I was sure that taking a little space and figuring things out was the right thing to do. I knew I was being strong, doing what was best for me. But when I stepped outside after leaving Jonah’s penthouse, I felt alone. I didn’t like the feeling very much. I wrapped my arms around myself to ward off the chill in the air, but that didn’t do much to make me feel better. My spirit was about as low as it had ever been—which was saying something.
Wasn’t I used to doing things on my own? I was, once. I could only rely on myself when Sara was imprisoned. A one-woman army, something like that. Only I got used to being with Jonah, relying on him to support me, to be there for me when I needed a shoulder to lean on. I needed him—or, I thought I did. That was my biggest mistake, telling myself that I needed him. I had tricked myself into believing I couldn’t get on without him—obviously, since I felt so lonely, standing out there on the sidewalk in front of the high-rise.
That feeling didn’t last long. I didn’t take more than three steps away from the building
before my phone started buzzing. For a split second, I thought it might be him, trying to get in touch with me.
To ask me to come back.
I wouldn’t. Maybe.
It wasn’t him. It was a text from Raze.
Another funny thing, how Raze used to be such a huge part of my life but I almost never thought about him anymore.
Everything had shifted so far, so fast.
Meet me at the coffee shop on the northwest corner, his text read.
I blinked, too stunned to move.
How did he know where I was?
I looked around and saw the coffee shop in question. What was he even doing in this part of town? The library, sure, but out here? I had a lot of questions for him. I practically sprinted to the corner to meet him.
He was sitting at a small, round table, one of those high-top ones with the tall stools.
I hopped up onto one and glared at him. “What are you doing here?”
He flinched. “I didn’t know there was an invisible fence I couldn’t go over,” he muttered. “And hello to you, too, by the way.”
I didn’t soften. “How did you know where I was?”
“What if I followed you?”
“What if I hit you right now, in front of all these people?”
“Come on, Anissa. Don’t be this way. I’ve been looking for you. There’s something very important you need to know about. And I didn’t actually follow you—I was only kidding.”
“Hilarious,” I smirked. “What is it I need to know? And that still doesn’t explain how you found me.”
He looked down at his coffee cup. “What if I told you Sara told me where to find you.”
My eyes lit up. “Sara? Where is she? I was just on my way to find her.”
“You wouldn’t know where to look.”
“Yeah, no kidding, but I’ve been sleuthing for a while now. I’m getting pretty good at tracking people.”
“I don’t even wanna know,” he muttered.
“Good, because I don’t even wanna tell you.”
I would’ve liked to. I needed to unload on somebody—there was so much happening in my head and my heart, and a best friend would’ve come in handy right about then. But there was too much that could get Raze in trouble if he knew about it. I wouldn’t put him in that position.
