“The large windows allow the sunshine to come right in.”
“And the view of Pebble Creek . . .”
He raised an inquisitive brow. “You know what I was thinking?”
“What?”
“That you could work on your art in here. And sketch.” He lowered his tone to stress how very serious he was. “Anna, I know you want to study art, but you can do it without getting a four-year degree. And it doesn’t have to take place in a large classroom.”
He stepped closer, and their gazes locked in mutual understanding. “God was the greatest teacher of all, and He didn’t have a classroom.”
He watched the surprised expression on her face.
When she responded, uncertainty edged her voice. “Denki. But college will help me to learn so much more.”
He smiled a little. “Fortunately, you’re a natural. Anna, there are people, like me, who could study art for years and never sketch like you do.”
Her cheeks flushed. “Thank you for that, Jesse. You’ll never know how much I treasure your belief in me.”
“But Anna, there’s so much more to my feelings for you.”
* * *
That night, Anna’s conversation with Jesse replayed in her mind until she finally stopped sketching and stepped to her bedroom window to gaze out at Pebble Creek. Of course, she couldn’t see it in the dark. All she could glimpse was the half-moon. At the same time, the words of her mamma’s letter danced through her thoughts like a soft, comfortable blanket.
She pressed her palms against the windowsill and leaned forward. The light blue curtains her mother had sewn on her old Singer sewing machine were attached to hooks on both sides.
As Anna stared out into the darkness, her mind eventually focused on Jesse, and their serious talks, and a happy sigh escaped her throat. We’re opposites really. I want to go out and see the world. Jesse’s content to stay right here, where we’ve been our whole lives. He’s happy to farm and watch crops grow. But our differences are even stronger than that. Jesse has had a typical Amish upbringing from two respected parents. There’s no way he can understand what it’s like to have been adopted, and not know for over two decades why his mamma gave him up. Of course, that’s to his advantage.
Nothing bothers me now. Not even Mrs. Graber looking down on me and whispering that I’m not a real Amish girl. It doesn’t hurt me anymore that I’ve been looked down on by some because I’m adopted. While they might feel that way, I realize I’m blessed to be here, even if I’m not my parents’ own flesh and blood.
I respect that Mamma had me. Like Jesse said, she didn’t have to. But she was brave to bring me into this world, and I love her so much for that. Life is a miracle. Doesn’t that mean I’m a miracle, too?
* * *
In the barn the following morning, Anna fully acknowledged that the contest was fast approaching and, in her opinion, she didn’t have a winning entry. The issue was the Englisch version of Anna. The woman Anna still didn’t truly know. Would she ever be happy with the facial expression of the non-Amish woman? She shrugged.
Anna considered the subject while she raked dirty straw. As soon as she finished, she proceeded to shovel the pile into one of their two large wheelbarrows.
A moderately cool breeze floated in through the large, open barn doors. The exit behind the horses’ stalls was open, too. A tiny mouse scurried out to the vast pasture where cattle and horses grazed.
After Anna finished her task, she stepped up the ladder that was nailed to the hayloft, being very careful not to catch her dress on the rungs. At the top, she used both hands and all her weight to push the nearest bale of straw over the edge. As it landed on the floor, she dusted her hands together and sat on the edge to catch her breath.
For a moment, she enjoyed the view from the small window in the loft that allowed a pleasant glimpse of Pebble Creek. Yesterday’s conversation at the Norris farm flitted through her mind until she closed her eyes.
Jesse Beiler wanted to marry her. She still couldn’t believe it, because with all her heart, she yearned to be his wife. But the dream she’d carried in her heart most of her life couldn’t materialize if she wed her best friend. She thought of the list she’d kept for so many years. And what had always remained first on it.
She opened her eyes and pressed her lips together thoughtfully. What he’d said about using the room that overlooked Pebble Creek as an art studio made sense. But her plans were so much larger than that.
She yearned more than ever to explore different cultures. It was difficult to believe that if her mamma had lived, Anna would have been Catholic. She didn’t really know much about that faith, but what she was sure of was that she couldn’t wait to visit San Diego, the place she’d come into the world.
Still, the warm sensation of Jesse’s fingers wrapped around hers prompted a surge of excitement that nothing in the world could replace. Jesse Beiler. Anna Beiler.
Pressing her lips firmly together in a line of determination, she gave a firm shake of her head. Automatically, the memory of Old Sam entered her head, and she smiled a little. She’d heard all sorts of stories about the artistic genius and his loving wife, Esther.
When they’d been alive, Old Sam had carried something special that he’d made just for her for their sixtieth wedding anniversary all the way up the hill. He’d buried it in hopes of giving his beloved wife a symbol of their love. Unfortunately, Esther had gone to the Lord before that day. However, years later, blessings had come from it. People associated with Old Sam always seemed to be blessed.
Miraculously, his niece, Jessica, hadn’t even believed in God when she’d come to Arthur, Illinois. Now, she did. If God had created a miracle like that, surely He would bless Anna with one, too.
And there were other stories, too. Levi and Annie Miller had met at Pebble Creek when they were kids. Anna had been told that on the top of that very hill, Levi had asked Annie to spend the rest of her life with him.
Closing her eyes with great emotion, Anna crossed her palm over her chest and drew in a deep, helpful breath. She acknowledged her dream of sketching beautiful canvases all day. Of venturing off to places where human beings practiced different cultures. Different faiths.
However, at the same time, she realized an even greater dream. To find true love and to be a good wife to the man she loved with all her heart. Footsteps interrupted her thoughts, and she heard Jesse’s voice. “Anna, what are you doing up there?”
Suddenly, she felt silly that she’d allowed her mind to wander to finding a husband when, really, what she needed to do was finish cleaning the animal stalls and freshen the bedding.
She waved a hand in a friendly welcome and tried for her best explanation. “Did you find out anything yet? About the Norris farm?”
“Not yet.”
“I’m ready to spread straw in the horse stalls, and I . . .” She smiled, deciding on complete honesty. “I was thinking of some of the wonderful things that happened at Pebble Creek.”
Stepping up to the top of the ladder, he joined her. At her side, he nodded. “I understand. There’s nothing like it, is there?”
She silently acknowledged that today, while sorting things out, she needed to stay away from Jesse. Doing that with him next to her was difficult. To clear her mind and look at things realistically. She stood and began carefully stepping down the ladder, which was attached to the loft. At the bottom, she looked up at him and answered. “No, there isn’t.”
Even in this short time with Jesse, she had experienced a sense of calm and satisfaction that she’d never felt before. She wasn’t sure why, but she reasoned it was because he listened to her without judging.
And his advice was well-thought-out. Jah, Jesse Beiler put her at ease . . . and excited her at the same time. And no matter how much she tried to rid him from her thoughts and focus on her lifelong goal, she couldn’t deny that she loved him.
“You gonna finish spreading straw?”
She nodded. �
�But I’m behind on my chores today.”
He quickly made his way down the ladder after her. All of a sudden, he darted her a handsome grin. “Then I came at the right time to lend you a hand.”
He grasped his hands around the cords that tied a bale of straw together and hoisted it over his shoulder.
But she didn’t protest. Jesse could carry a bale of straw the long distance to the stalls much more quickly than she could load it into the wheelbarrow and push it herself. And while she followed him, she smiled a little. No matter how much she tried to put Jesse out of her mind, she never could. And do I really want to?
* * *
The contest deadline was near. The drawing of the two women still wasn’t to Anna’s satisfaction. Yet her mind focused on Jesse and what he’d confessed to her at the Norris farm.
She also contemplated the words of her mamma’s letter. Still, she was sure that pursuing the Englisch life via the upcoming contest was the right route to go. How could she change her mind when she’d had it at the top of her list all these years?
Today, the King home was even more quiet than usual. Maemm had told her not to fix a big dinner because she and Daed would be home late. As Anna ran the feather duster up the stairway banister, she allowed herself to imagine a life with Jesse. As she closed her eyes for one blissful moment, her heart skipped a beat. When she opened them, she let out a sigh of contentment and proceeded to dust where the oak poles met the steps on the way down.
Thunder interrupted her thoughts. As a bolt of lightning crackled, she glimpsed the sudden downpour from the small stair window. Without warning, a different downpour returned to her thoughts. The storm when Jesse had carried her into the barn. Their conversation. The careful way he’d attended to the cut on her forehead. For a moment, she closed her eyes to savor the memory.
Rain beat down on the roof. Usually, she didn’t like precipitation because she loved being outside. But today, for some reason, the weather seemed conducive to helping her think things through.
After she imagined a life with Jesse, she switched to the thought of venturing out into the Englisch world. To experiencing a California sunset. To wearing her hair down.
She gave a discouraged shake of her head and finished her task. She stepped to the kitchen to return the duster to its place underneath the kitchen sink and to pull out a container of wood polish.
She stepped back to the stairwell, polish in one hand, thin rag in the other. Careful not to disperse too much dark liquid into her rag, she dipped it and used slow strokes to apply it to the rail that ran all the way up to the second floor.
The contest was just around the corner, and she’d been thinking more and more of the talk that would spread if and when her church became aware of her plans. Fortunately, right now it was still a secret. She’d certainly had heard if it wasn’t. Amazingly, she felt closer than ever to Maemm. Especially since she’d told her that she and Anna’s daed had always planned to adopt. Even if Anna didn’t win first place, the knowledge of her aim to go after a four-year degree outside of their community could harm her parents. Mostly, she was concerned for her folks. They were always very careful to do what was expected of them.
When her thoughts unexpectedly migrated to Jesse, she pressed her lips together in a fine line while she considered the rugged-looking man who’d quickly become the best friend she’d ever had. While she rubbed deep brown polish in to the oak, she smiled a little.
As long as she’d known him, he’d always seemed logical. Reasonable. He’d never been one to pass judgment. Jesse had always appeared to be on the quiet side, but when something happened that required strength, he’d always been there. For instance, she recalled a time in school when he’d stopped a fight. He’d been, without a doubt, the strongest kid in her class, even though he hadn’t been the tallest. Her heart picked up speed to an unusually nervous, fast speed.
I want a four-year degree. Independence to express who I am. But I want to be with Jesse, too. Her shoulders tensed. Then she drew in a deep, relaxing breath as she remembered that the Lord was her guide and her Savior.
How could I have such little faith when You are with me? Dear Lord, please hear my prayer. You know my concerns as well as my lifelong dream. Please guide me and protect my family. Amen.
As soon as she opened her eyes, she heard the side door open.
“Daed!” She went to hug him. “You’re home early!”
He smiled a little as he grabbed a metal container of cabinet stain. He stepped around the hall to the washroom. As he spoke, she could barely hear him over the sound of the water. “The store’s out, and we’re almost done, so I’m taking what’s here to finish up.”
When he rejoined her, he regarded her with a hopeful expression. “I was thinking about your fresh-squeezed lemonade.”
“Of course! Let me wash my hands and I’ll pour you one.”
Quick steps took her to the washroom in the hall. When she returned to the kitchen, she stood on her tiptoes to reach a glass, filled it with ice, and poured her daed the freshly squeezed lemonade.
At the dining-room table, she sat down across from him. It was nice to have him home, even if it wasn’t for long.
“Anna, when the rain stops, would you tell Jesse that there are extra bags of oats? It slipped my mind.”
“Aren’t they in the barn?”
He nodded. “But they’re on the east side. He might not see them.”
“Sure, Daed. I’ll let him know.”
Thunder crackled.
Sitting back in his chair, her father grinned. “At least you’re inside this time, safe and sound.”
She nodded.
“How’s that scar?”
She lifted her bangs so he could see, and he nodded his approval. “I was sure it needed stitches. But you proved me wrong.” After a slight hesitation, her father went on. “Looks like we’re going to need more staff at the bakery. Thought it would be a nice full-time job for you.”
Anna frowned, trying to hide her disapproval. Compared to working on her sketches, working full-time in the bakery didn’t appeal to her at all. She wanted control of her life. To make her own choices, even though she knew her daed had her best interests at heart.
At the same time, she was fully aware that the man sitting opposite her loved her, and that his intentions were good. She watched him drink from the large glass, fully aware how fortunate she was to be part of such a loving family, even if it was only the three of them.
There was no one more hardworking than Paul King. And no man around was more honest. Which made what she set out to do much, much harder.
Inside, she shook. She loved her father with all her heart. He could give the appearance of being warm and understanding. But she knew him too well. To her daed, there was only black and white. No in between. Right was right and wrong was wrong.
I wish Daed could better understand that not everyone’s the same. That we don’t all think alike. And if God blesses me with that scholarship, I’m afraid he will be angry and ashamed. If I don’t win, maybe it will be a blessing. But the desire to learn and share with others how I’ve captured things on paper is so strong. Why did God give me the ability to draw if He didn’t intend for me to share the gift He gave me?
* * *
Jesse made his way to Anna’s sketching place. He couldn’t wait to tell her that he now owned the farm. He’d found out last night, before dinner, and at the dining table, his daed had said a special prayer to God. And Jesse continued to give his thanks to the Creator of the universe.
But Anna’s contest was only two days away. And even though he had his farm, his life wouldn’t be complete unless she came with it.
* * *
Light, gurgling sounds from Pebble Creek floated through the warm, late-summer air. On the ground, Anna rested her back against a large rock and held her canvas on her lap.
She’d risen very early again to start her chores so there would be enough time to work on her sketch at the
place that most inspired her. Not only that, but she and Jesse had arranged to meet here.
Hopefully, today, the Norris farm would belong to him. She’d said an extra prayer for Jesse before she’d left her house this morning.
Not wanting to waste time, she began moving her pencil over the pad that rested comfortably on her thighs. The shallow water gently rolled over pebbles, prompting a spirit of ease and relaxation through Anna’s entire body, starting at her shoulders and flowing all the way down to her toes.
I’m still taking in how Jesse and I have become so close. It’s certainly an unusual relationship because of my contest entry. At first, I feared he’d tell the bishop. But I didn’t know Jesse then. Now I do, and I like the part of him that respects my ambition, and the soft side of him that wants to help me.
The water cascading over the pebbles lulled her into a state of inspiration, and she took advantage. As she slid her pencil lightly over the visage of the woman who claimed most of the canvas, a soft, familiar voice pulled her from her reverie.
She sat up a little straighter. Not at all because she was on edge but because talking to Jesse about her project made the pulse on her wrist move to an excited, hopeful pace.
She straightened and waved a hand in a friendly greeting when she glimpsed him coming her way. “Over here!”
This part of Pebble Creek was the ideal meeting place because her family’s land brushed up against this branch of the creek. The late Sam Beachy had willed the area that had been coined Pebble Creek to Jessica, who’d come from out of state.
The mere thought of creative genius Old Sam prompted a sense of well-being in Anna’s chest. For years, she’d coveted this place.
She’d talked to Jessica Beachy a few times, and Anna planned to ask Old Sam’s great-niece to continue spending time here. Quickly recalling her purpose, she watched Jesse wade through the tall, wild grass. When he finally stood in front of her, he offered her a wide smile and extended his arms. “I made it.”
As he stepped closer, she jumped up and clenched her palms in front of her. “Did you get the farm?”
The corners of his mouth lifted. “Jah!”
Love at Pebble Creek Page 18
