Pillar of Light (The Lost Princess Book 1)

by A. Mashburn

  He ran the water, dripping in various oils that began to fill the room with a spicy calming essence. “It’s serene out here away from civilization. You’ve spent so much time cooped up in a big city, this has to be a bit of a culture shock.”

  “You might think so, but no, I love the outdoors. Being in a place like this feels almost like home. I know, that probably sounds silly but it feels right. This whole situation has flipped my life upside down. Nothing is what I thought it was yet, nothing has ever felt so right.” Gretchen closed her eyes as she allowed the sounds of birds and the smell of the herbs and oils to wash over her.

  She felt Nicoli’s hands wrap around her waist as he pulled her shirt over her head. “You need to wash up.” He responded to her unasked question as he kissed the crook of her neck. A shiver ran down her spine and another kiss landed on her shoulder as he skillfully unbuttoned her jeans and began peeling them down over her curvacious hips.

  She stepped out of her pants and turned towards him. His hands lightly gripped her hips and she had to give him credit. He didn’t ogle her body, much to her disappointment; yet, as she examined the fierce expression he had on his face, she had to step back. “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  His shoulders heaved and he ran his hand over his face. “Nothing, Princess, please get in the bath, soak for a while then put on the robe.”

  He turned to walk away and Gretchen grabbed his arm. “What’s up with the hot-cold thing, Nicoli? You’ve never shut me out like that. Seriously, what is going on?”

  He pegged her with a hard stare. “You say that like you know me, Princess; you don’t.”

  She dropped her hand and lowered her eyes. “I know, I—” She felt his hand under her chin.

  “Look at me,” she didn’t miss the gruffness in his voice. “You cast your eyes down to no one, you understand me? Not now, not ever.” He sighed, “I know you don’t understand,” he caressed her cheek with the back of his hand, “but I can’t stay here when you’re naked. I won’t be able to stop myself or my wolf.”

  Gretchen groaned, “I’ve told you; I don’t want to wait. You’re the one who wants to, remember?”

  He let out a soft chuckle as his eyes darkened. “Is it so bad for me to want you to want me because you want me, not because of instinct? I need you to remember who you are, who we were. This way, you can make the decision based on how you really feel, not because of this damned bond.” He traced his finger down her arm causing goosebumps to rise across her skin. He breathed deep, inhaling the sweet scent of her arousal. “See, just a touch and you want me. How can I take you when you have no idea what it means for me—for us?”

  “You could tell me…” she trailed off as he cocked his head to the side and raised his eyebrow. “You want me to know why I feel this way, not just feel it, but to understand it, right?”

  He kissed her forehead tenderly. “You’ve heard the whispers of your wolf, I’m sure. But until you’re unbound, I won’t take something that you may not be willing to give me once your memories have returned. Our bond only goes so far; you have a choice. If you want this bond to grow, we will nurture it together. If not, you’ll know how to break it.” He released her and stalked out of the room, leaving her confused and suddenly cold.

  Genesis?

  I haven’t gone anywhere. I’m part of you, remember? All you have to do is think something at me; you don’t have to mentally knock on the door to see if I’m home. Genesis snickered at her human counterpart.

  Okay, I’m so confused. I know I want Nicoli with everything in me. Why does he keep pushing me away?

  He’s an honorable man and wolf, Gretchen. He was entrusted with your care for a reason. My guess is that he loves us and wants us to fully understand what it means to be his mate before he takes what you are offering. He doesn’t want you to have any regrets after your memories return, just as he said.

  Gretchen stepped into the bath and lowered herself into the water. The oils coated her skin and the scent of sage, frankincense and myrrh filled her nose as her body began to relax. You think he loves us?

  If he didn’t love us at least a little, do you think he would be here worrying about your virtue? Genesis cooed.

  Gretchen sighed and dipped her head under the water as she rinsed out her hair. He should stop worrying so much about my virtue and start enjoying my lack of one, she grumbled as Genesis laughed. All in good time, Princess, all in good time.

  Gretchen heard a little knock, opened her eyes and peered in the direction of the sound. Mo’s smiling face greeted her in the doorway. “Are you about ready?” Mo asked.

  Gretchen smiled, happy to see her friend’s familiar face. “Yeah, you look good, Mo—you’re almost… glowing?” She gave her friend a once over. “Yeah, definitely glowing. What’s going on?”

  Mo’s grin stretched and happiness shone in her eyes. She walked to the robe Gretchen left on the chair’s back, picked it up, and held it open for Gretchen to step into. “I found my mate,” she said quietly but no less enthusiastically. At that moment, Slovenia walked in the door with the same happy glow about her and Gretchen’s heart leapt as she flung her hands around Mo’s neck.

  “I’m so happy for you. Nicoli told me a little bit about mates and the bond they share. From what I gather, this is a wonderful thing.” She looked to Slovenia, ran to her and wrapped her arms around her neck in a loving embrace. “Mated to a dragon, eh? Who would have thought?” Gretchen held her hand out to Mo and the three girls hugged.

  Slovenia and Mo laughed at Gretchen’s enthusiasm. As their gazes met over Gretchen’s shoulder, they wove their fingers together, squeezed tight and comforted each other. Gretchen pulled back and looked between the two females. “This,” she motioned between the two of them, “is a good thing, right?”

  They both smiled; Slovenia squeezed Mo’s hand one more time before releasing her and answering Gretchen. “This is a marvelous thing, Gretchen. It’s more than I ever thought I could possibly be blessed with.”

  Gretchen could sense the but hanging in the air, “But?”

  “But,” Mo smiled sadly, “we’ve both got a bit of a past and it won’t be easy.”

  “You’ll make it work, though,” she assured them and grabbed Slovenia’s free hand. “Mo is the most loyal and fierce friend I could have ever asked for. I know she’ll be no different with you—trust that no matter what happens, she will have your back.”

  “Yeah, I paid her to be my hype man when I found my mate,” Mo grinned and winked at Slovenia.

  “Did not,” Gretchen insisted, “it’s true, every word. You never gave up on me and I know you won’t give up on this either.”

  Slovenia squeezed Gretchen’s hand in acknowledgment. “I know she is amazing, she’ll be the best mate I could ever ask for but, as with all relationships, there will be some hurdles and we’ll cross those when they come. Until then, I think we should do what you came here for. What do you say, Princess, are you ready?”

  Gretchen hooked her arm through Slovenia’s and smiled. “I’m ready.”

  When they entered the garden, Gretchen noticed a bare plot of grass circled by wildflowers. Slovenia walked her to the spot and instructed her to lay down. “You will remove your robe and lay in the grass with your eyes closed and hands to the side. You will feel me place the Chakra stones on your body.”

  Gretchen’s heart began to race as her eyes sought out Nicoli. Usually, she could feel him near, a constant prickling in the back of her mind. At that moment, she felt empty. Slovenia reached up and placed a calming hand on her cheek. “He’s around, as he always has been.” She nodded into the shadows as the faint lemony smell hit Gretchen’s nose and calmed her.

  She felt Mo tug on the shoulder of her robe. “Hey,” Mo said. “He’s here. It would be too hard for him to be right here with you. There might be some pain as your memories are unlocked and your wolf unbound. It’s his instinct to keep you from pain, so it’s best if he’s not here; but believe me, if he co
uld, he would be.”

  Gretchen nodded her head in understanding and released her hold on the robe. She felt the cool breeze on her skin and noticed the moon rising in the sky. Slovenia walked to the grass clearing and she followed. Gretchen laid down and closed her eyes as Slovenia had instructed.

  She heard Slovenia’s melodic voice as she began to chant to the Moon Goddess, thanking her for her love, devotion, and blessings. She then turned to Gretchen, “You have seven chakras. I will place the stone with each one I name. After I place the stones, you will hear me chant the names and the meaning while I continue to pray to the Moon Goddess to bring your chakras back into alignment. You will fall asleep for a bit, but after, I warn you… there will be pain; ready?”

  Gretchen nodded and Slovenia began, “The Crown Chakra,” a cool stone was placed near Gretchen’s crown. “The Third Eye Chakra,” another stone was placed between her brows. “Throat Chakra, Heart Chakra, Solar Plexus, Sacral Plexus, and the Root Chakra.” As each of the stones was named and placed, Gretchen felt her body begin to vibrate pleasantly. “Sahasrara, I understand. Ajna, I see. Vishuddha, I speak. Anahata, I love. Manipura, I do. Swadhthana, I feel. Muladhara, I am.” Slovenia repeated this chant a few times before Gretchen fell into darkness.

  Nicoli paced in the woods, walking as far away from the girls as the bond would allow. Xander paced in his mind and demanded that he be as close to Gretchen as possible.

  Xander, if—or should I say, when, she begins to feel the pain of the bond breaking, we cannot go slaughterhouse on everyone. It’s best if we just stay away until they’re done. I’m sure that when it’s all over, Genesis will instinctively run towards our scent.

  I can control myself, you jackass. I’m not a complete animal.

  Nicoli rolled his eyes. You are an animal. The only thing that makes you anything else is me.

  Asshole, Xander grumbled.

  Nicoli scowled but grinned, whole ass.

  A scream ripped through the air and Xander forced the shift. Xander, Nicoli tried to gain control, but he would not allow it. His back arched as his bones snapped and twisted. He felt his face crack and reform into a snout and hair began to grow across his body. Xander let out a vicious howl as Nicoli tried to talk some sense into him. Xander, you must listen to me. She is in pain from the unbinding. You know this, try to calm down; it will be over soon.

  I can’t, our mate's in trouble. Gretchen is in pain, I have to help her, Xander whimpered as his heart ached. He ran faster as another scream pierced the night. I won’t hurt them, Nicoli. I must be there with her; I can’t stay away, I’m sorry.

  Xander leapt over a downed tree as he searched for Gretchen. He followed the sorrowful moans and as he came to a clearing where he saw her shift begin. Her bones snapped one by one, and she cried out in pain, making him whine.

  Mo turned to him with pain swelling in her eyes. “Hey there, big guy. I guess you couldn’t stay away, huh?”

  He whimpered again and shook his large head as he took a few steps forward. He continued to advance on them when he felt a force push him back; he growled. Mate—I must be with her—I can help make it less painful. He pushed against the invisible force and took another step.

  “Vinnie, he won’t hurt us. He didn’t attack. I know him; I know Xander. He’s trying to help.” Mo pleaded with Slovenia to let him pass.

  A sickening snap filled the air as Gretchen’s hip broke to accommodate her wolf’s size. She let out a gut-wrenching scream and Xander whined as he pushed harder against Slovenia’s magic.

  “Slovenia, please. He loves her. He would never hurt her!”

  Slovenia looked at Mo with tired eyes. “It’s not her I’m worried about.” She then cut each of her palms, letting the blood drip down as she reached one hand towards the moon and the other keeping Xander in his place as she began to chant again.

  “Please,” Mo begged, hearing Xander whimper as he tried to come closer and blood began to seep from his snout. “Vinnie, please; he will not hurt us. He wants to help. He can help her with her shift; he’s her mate!” At the word mate, Slovenia’s eyes widened and she lowered her hand while she continued to chant.

  Xander lunged forward towards Gretchen’s slowly shifting body. The moment he pressed his body against hers, she sagged in relief. A single tear slipped down her cheek and her eyes began to illuminate. “Oh, Xander,” Gretchen threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his scruff. Xander, everything is so jumbled in my head. But I remember—”

  She moaned again as her back arched and she fell to all fours. Her shoulders dislocated and rearranged as her limbs started to shift beneath her. Each finger broke to reshape into her wolf's paws as claws sprouted from her fingertips. Xander tucked her body under his, emitting a low rumble from his chest that seemed to relax her further into the shift. White fur sprouted from her body as he heard her jaw crack as her snout began to form.

  A whimper came from the ground as Gretchen laid there, eyes closed as her breath came in short pants. Xander nudged her with his snout and sat on his haunches as he howled to the moon at the sight before him.

  Our mate is beautiful, my friend. Xander said to Nicoli in awe as he began to lick her snout. She was all white, the opposite of him. The only exception was the tips of her twin tails, ears, and wings; they were each edged with the same color as her brilliant red hair. When she looked up at him, her eyes held recognition in them as she tried to stand. Instead of letting her stand though, he growled low at her and placed a giant paw on her back. He gently shoved his massive body into hers, making her lay down to rest. The shift had been hard on her and he knew her body ached.

  Mo and Slovenia watched as the two interacted with such care. “He truly loves her, doesn’t he?” Slovenia observed.

  “He always has,” Mo admitted. “Why else would he have done everything he has to protect her?” she paused, “Vinnie?” Slovenia moved her gaze from the wolves to Mo. “Her memories are back, right?”

  Slovenia nodded. “It will take time for them to work themselves out and for her to piece everything together; but they’ll come to her. Right now, Gretchen is resting, while Genesis is in the driver’s seat. When she wakes from her slumber tomorrow, we will see what blanks we have to fill in. Until then, let’s give them some privacy; they’ll want to become reacquainted.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Genesis allowed Xander the time he needed to be satisfied she was okay. She looked down at her white paws and huffed in pleasure as the wind ruffled her fur. She felt Gretchen probe at her subconscious. Genesis, we did it.

  Aye, beauty, we did. How are you feeling? Genesis asked her human.

  It was painful, but better when Xander came. Why is that?

  Xander is my mate; Nicoli is yours. When our mates are there for our shift, it’s less painful because we are with our other half. Now that I’m here, I can feel our souls interacting.

  Gretchen grew quiet in the back of their shared mind, as if deep in thought. Is that what you weren’t sure of before?

  Yes, until I reached maturity, I couldn’t know for sure he was ours. And because I was bound while I was still a pup, that ability remained inaccessible until now. Now that we are free, I can feel him. Do you feel the energy flowing through us where he lays?

  I do, I kind of felt it when I went looking for him in the woods. It’s like an invisible tether that I followed to find him.

  Exactly, Love, as the bond grows, you’ll be able to speak to him through a mind link. You’ll also be able to feel where he is, always, and find him when no one else could. The same would be true of him, with us.

  It makes sense that he would be our mate, Gretchen conceded. Some of the things that I’ve remembered, were in my dreams. The thought never crossed my mind that they could be real. Could Xander have pushed them to us? That sounds crazy, doesn’t it?

  Genesis huffed, not at all, I’m in here too, remember? She had to laugh at the naivety of her human. We are extraordinarily strong,
Gretchen. Both Xander and I are the strongest wolves of our time and our bond has been since birth. When he shifted early, it triggered me to wake. Our bond had just begun to grow when we had to leave our family. Only I was bound, so Xander could communicate with us in some ways. I just couldn’t interact with him. It was a one-way road, you might say. I missed him terribly; now we're both here and all I want to do is run with him by my side.

  Gretchen smiled inside their shared mind. Then do it. You’ve earned the freedom, Genesis. Have fun—just no wolfy sex.

  Genesis laughed wholeheartedly at that and Xander raised his head and peered at her huffing.

  Please, Genesis—rest. Xander pleaded, knowing she wouldn’t be able to hear him.

  Xander, stop worrying, I’m fine and I’ve well and truly rested long enough, Genesis replied.

  Xander’s head snapped towards Genesis' face, which held a wolfy grin. She lapped quickly at the side of his face and rolled to push him off with her hind legs. She leapt up quickly and stretched. Xander, I’m fine.

  He stared at her wide-eyed, not saying anything and Genesis laughed. Come, Xander. Run with me.

  Xander cocked his head to the side. How?

  How, what? How to run? Oh, come on, Love, you haven’t forgotten how to run as much as you’ve forgotten that I can communicate with you, have you?

  I did forget. Xander took a tentative step towards her. She was a beautiful wolf, smaller than him, but still bigger than most. She was as white as the first winter snowfall in the Scottish Highlands he remembered from his youth, and her ever-changing hazel eyes were alight with mischief as she bounded off towards the woods. He stood for a moment before racing after her.

  Genesis leapt over downed logs and yipped in delight as she sensed Xander draw nearer. She ran faster, dodging brush and trees as she zigzagged through the foliage. She noticed a large bush and dipped behind it, poking her head around the scrub to see if he was coming.