by Marie Hall
His words sounded like ones given to a small child who needed encouragement while learning how to walk, but his tone was harsher, that of a man pushing tired soldiers through to the next engagement. He didn't bother to look at Xavier, but Xavier was sure he knew of his presence. As the formation moved past the five men off to the side with Xavier, they turned their mounts and started forward. Xavier fell in line with them. But hardly twenty steps further, Io stumbled and went down. Everyone again stopped, but not one man moved to assist her.
"Get up, my lady," Roth called. "Get up; you are almost there."
Io must have given some signal because someone to her left called out, "Refusal."
"A hundred more steps, Io, to the clearing," Roth called out over the heads of the men who didn't make a move to lift Io out of the dirt. Again, someone called out she was refusing. And as he made his way alongside those walking, Xavier saw him take a deep breath, look down the road and then at the trees and brush nearby before, with a sharp nod, he said, "Try."
The moment one man reached for her, Io screamed out. Not a pained or frightened scream but an angry, desperate cry. Another reached for her with the same result. Xavier couldn't see clearly, but from the sound and the way those trying to stand her back up, she seemed to be flailing about.
"Io, get up. Stand," Roth commanded. "We must clear the wood line. Take fifty more steps. Thirty."
Nothing. Not any movement or sound, and Xavier was done. He made to dismount and retrieve his wife, only to be stopped when Roth looked right at him, pointed a finger and said, "No!"
It was enough Xavier took seriously the man's better understanding of the situation. But Liam leaned in and elaborated, "She will hurt herself fighting. It is better to let her do this in her own time, her own way."
Even as he spoke, the formation took a few steps forward and Xavier realized Io was crawling, literally crawling down the road. The pain cut across his heart and bent him. A few more steps forward and, again, it all came to a stop.
"Enough then," Roth announced, defeat in his voice. A collective sigh from everyone else and the formation shifted, until only about twenty men remained standing around Io as the rest went back to their horses and began pulling out what they'd need to camp for the night.
This time, when Xavier tried to dismount, no one stopped him, but Roth stepped in front of him before he could step any closer to Io, who, as best he could see, was already asleep in the middle of the road, right in the dirt.
"What is this?" Xavier's harsh whisper was heard only by Roth. He'd no idea why he whispered; it simply seemed appropriate.
"Come," Roth said, jerking his head toward the trees. Xavier followed as every fiber in him told him to get to Io. They went only a few feet into the woods before Roth turned on him. "Why are you here?"
The venom in the man's voice caught Xavier off guard and he struggled to answer, "I came to see what was the delay."
"Well, you have seen it; you can ride on," Roth spat and then made to leave.
"Roth, Adam," Xavier reached out as he addressed the man as informally as possible. "I came to speak with her. To speak with my wife."
"Lady Io is not speaking to anyone at the moment." He sounded near despair to Xavier.
"She will speak with me," Xavier said, gathering resolve, remembering he was in fact their lord.
"She will not."
"This is a domestic matter. You will not interfere," Xavier reminded him.
"This stopped being a domestic matter when you broke her," Roth snarled back.
"Broke her?"
"Do you not see her? She is broken. She is worse now than when she first came to us. She will not eat, she will not take aid, she lies down every day at sunset looking like she hopes she doesn't see the dawn, and when she does, she looks filled with despair. She has no spirit, no will. I do not even know what keeps her alive. She is nearly a walking corpse." Roth stopped long enough to whip his hand over his face. "You broke her. She is defeated, and no one knows what she must have to lift her back."
Xavier closed his eyes and willed some miraculous answers to come to him. None did, but perhaps he could make do without them. Looking toward the west, he noted the position of the sun on the horizon. It was perhaps an hour before it was gone. Nothing would be done tonight. Facing Roth again, he made a quick plan and started its execution. "Everyone stay with the routine you have developed for tonight, but see to it everyone is gone before sunrise tomorrow."
"Gone?" Roth's voice raised in pitch. "No one is going to leave her."
"I will remain, but I cannot reconcile with her if she feels protected from me. We must face each other."
"You expect any of us to trust you now? When you have been absent for a week?"
"I was wrong to wait so long. I know this. I was hoping Io would make the choice, herself. That it would be her decision. It is always better when it is hers—"
"It is," Roth conceded.
"We have things we must speak on," Xavier went on. "I know Io better than anyone, and I know what it is that will bring resolution. I do not need your consent, but," Xavier waited to gauge Roth's possible response. "I am asking you to trust me. To believe when I say I will pull Io from this and I will bring her back to you restored. And if I cannot, I will still bring her back to you and you can wait with her at the Forks until I am seen at court."
"That would be in direct conflict with the king's command," Roth stated with skepticism.
"Yes, and it could find me in disfavor, but that is a lesser concern than Io's well-being. I will not have her destroyed just that she might get to court and be gawked at."
Roth still hesitated. "You will use force?"
"I am not sure what I may or may not do. It is not my intent to have this done at sword point, but… Io." Xavier felt his confidence grow when Roth had to fight off a smile.
"She has refused food, as far as I can tell since you…" Heat flared momentarily in the man's eyes. "She had not eaten the entire day she was taken."
"She did not forage?" The man shook his head. It was no wonder then that Io couldn't even stand. "I will see to it."
"She will not show me, but she took some injury."
Like finding she'd eaten nothing, this too surprised. Mark hadn't said anything, but then he'd found her after dark and Io may not have mentioned it. Xavier also failed completely to ask about her physical standing. He could only sigh. An inspection of her person was in his power, but he didn't want to strip her of her autonomy. She'd shown him the injury to her leg, but she waited until it helped her make a point. She might never have shown him the scar left when a blade was run through her. Only because he found it the first time she was naked before him did he know of it.
"She smells," Roth blurted out, breaking the stretch of silence between them.
"Smells?"
"She needs to bathe, change her clothes. Having a pot in the wagon with no lid wa—"
Xavier held up his hand to ward off the second lecture he'd get on this matter. "I will see to all of this." Again, he breathed in and let it out on a sigh. "Whether or not she wishes to reconcile, I will at least see her put right."
"And how long might we expect this to take? I will not wait the whole of a week to know her status." It was no veiled threat.
"I have no intention of falling further behind. I have ordered the others to wait for you in Tindale and then hold at The Forks. That is no more than three days out. But…" Xavier didn't want to be too long alone on the road with Io. The closer they came to the place where everyone gathered, the more chance some nuisance criminals could cross their path. He could easily enough defend them, but it'd only cause Io more distress.
"If you are not there in six days, I will send back a coach for Io," Roth told him, sounding like he might believe if it came down to blows, Io would come out victor.
"I do not think it will be necessary," Xavier grumbled.
"Then I will tell the men, and I will have some supplies shifted for Io." Xa
vier didn't miss the meaning in that statement. Io was and would be their only concern. It was exactly as Xavier always intended. Io had her own army, and she'd always be able to depend on them to do what was in her best interest. He'd always known the potential existed, they'd stand between him and his wife. However, it did seem, at least for now, even the worst domestic dispute would have them stepping aside.
Roth made his way back to the road, and after a few deep, calming breaths, Xavier followed. Roth was the ultimate authority, he commanded Io's guards, but that didn't mean they'd all just comply. Xavier expected hostilities before he was left alone with her. Io's men didn't surprise him.
Xavier pulled his bedroll and bags from the horse and loosened the saddle cinch. Dropping the bags next to a tree as close to the road as he could find, he carried the furs he used as a bed to Io, still sleeping in the middle of the road. His first instinct was to carry her some place less exposed and more comfortable, but it was clear the sixteen men sitting around her wouldn't be agreeable to the act. Shaking out the furs, he tossed them over her. Muttering about how she'd not keep it on went around. Xavier ignored it. He'd have to accept for now the criticism he received.
Not feeling he'd be welcomed if he lay down beside Io, he made his way back to the tree, and taking a seat, he made ready to wait out what was sure to be a long night. It was interrupted several times by small groups of men riding out and the occasional changing of those who directly guarded Io. Sleep never found him and perhaps an hour before dawn, one last group took all but four of Io's guard on toward The Forks. About the time the stars were fading, those four men stood and made their way to their horses. One man, though, came back and, stopping before Xavier, thrust out a small canvas bag.
"She let me carry this for her." Xavier took it, knowing as soon as he saw it what it was. "And about a day ago, she dropped this." The wooden camel hit Xavier in the chest and fell to his lap. "I do not know if she meant to leave it, but I picked it up." He was back across the road when Xavier called out his thanks.
The little bag of… trash, really, was never far from Io's hand. Nothing in the bag was useful to her. But every scrap of material and every stone meant something to her. The camel, though, Xavier had given that to her to prove that she was always on his mind. That he always considered her in his actions. He often saw her handling it when they'd some very small disagreement. That she'd left it in the road… he wasn't sure what to feel. A dull shaft of light fell across him, and Xavier stood and shoved the camel in the bag then shoved that inside his saddle packs.
Io started to stir in the road, and Xavier didn't know yet how he'd begin with her. He expected her to be distant and wary. He wouldn't begrudge her any anger she felt. And if she hated him again, he'd accept that, too.
But he watched her wake, look around, and realize she was alone. And then as she struggled to her feet, she again searched out familiar faces, only to find none. Then she stood looking first down the road the direction they all headed before turning to look back the way they came. He didn't expect her pitiful little cry to strike so hard at him. As he waited again for her to turn back, he started, hoping she might instead take steps toward home.
She didn't, though she did hold out her hand as if trying to reach something, but with a sob, her hand fell to her side and she turned back. Her feet tangling in the covers almost tripped her. Xavier knew he'd not lost her as he watched Io lift them from the ground and bring them to her nose. Stepping out on the road, he waited for her to again look up.
Their eyes clashed, and with more sobs, Io went down.
Chapter 5
Io squeezed her eyes shut, trying once more to refute the sunrise. It was not to be. With a deep breath, she opened them. The smell of dirt was almost always the first to hit her nostrils, but not this morning. This morning, she'd swear she smelt Xavier.
If not for the painful ache in her body, she'd swear she dreamed. And how pleasant a dream as his scent always gave her comfort. She closed her eyes to it one more time and made her wish.
Pushing up on shacking arms, Io prepared to make more of today than yesterday. She'd heard whispering about how far behind they fell. And she'd hoped maybe Roth would start sending people ahead. She didn't want or need the full number of men standing with her. She wanted time to be ready again for when she was alone.
Reaching up, she pressed the heel of her hand into her temple; already, her head throbbed. It'd been so long since she last felt starvation, not ever from the time Xavier had found her. Going back to that state was going to be worse, but she'd done it before, as a child, and if she could survive it then, she could now. As long as the men stopped trying to force her.
The men? She couldn't hear them this morning. Usually, the moment she stirred, so did they. Turning her head, she looked around. No one was in sight. Quickly getting to her feet, she took a better look. As far as she could see up and down the road and deep into the woods, she was alone. It made no sense. What had happened?
Her skin prickled at the unsettling quiet. Not even birds this morning. She pressed the back of her hand to her mouth to stop the cry clawing up her throat. Was she maybe dead? Left to haunt the road where she fell? Could that be why she'd thought Xavier's scent reached her? She was dead and damned to have her absolute loneliness pointed out. But could dead hurt this much? She didn't think so. So perhaps she'd only been abandoned.
Abandoned, though, was worse. Worse, more than before, because she'd not expected it. Xavier'd announced the end of their relationship, but she'd have thought he'd at least take her some place before leaving her to fend for herself. She didn't even know where she was to go from here. The Forks lay ahead, she knew that, but…
Turning, she looked north; Bainsport lay back that way. The house, Sarah, her other friends. She could go that way. Maybe get back before Xavier returned. But then what? Live the rest of her life hiding from his sight, knowing he was so close? Maybe watching as he took another as wife? She wouldn't last.
She almost laughed at that thought, hadn't she already wished for death? Her mother had cursed her with her dying breath. Fight. Live. Io had. She always did. She always would. Turning back south, Io would go forward. Perhaps as she went, someone would come along who'd take her some place new and she'd stay a while until she again wasn't wanted. Or perhaps she'd find something that allowed her to make her own way in the world at The Forks.
She took that first step and nearly tripped, her feet wrapped in a blanket. At least she had something to start. Bending, she lifted it and instantly realized why she'd smelt Xavier around her. His wood and leather odor saturated the material. She pressed it to her face, closed her eyes and inhaled. Trying to imagine him coming to her last night as she slept, to cover her, care for her like he once did. Hot tears slipped from under her lashes, rolling down her face. He was gone. She'd lost him. He couldn't trust, and they couldn't have a relationship if there was no trust.
Pressing her face into the fur once more then looking in the direction she'd go, her knees weakened and her legs failed her, the burn in her chest a mix of pain and the flame of hope. Not ten steps before her, Xavier.
"Get up, Io," she heard him say. She pulled the fur in and tried to smother the sobs. "Io, get up. Take my hand and stand." She couldn't. If she reached out and he vanished like the morning mist, she'd die right here. "Come now, settle." His warm hands under her arms from behind and before she could comprehend how, she was next to a horse waiting as he tightened the cinch and tossed his bags over then took the blanket from her slack grasp. He folded it a few times before arranging it on the saddle.
Pain rippled through her when she was placed in the saddle, even with the furs as a cushion. The majority of the hurt from Xavier's wrath faded, but a few thin cuts and deep bruises still remained.
"We won't be too long in the saddle," he said and swung up behind her. He tucked close to the saddle but didn't try to share it with her. Taking the reins, he trapped her gently in the circle of his arms an
d started them forward. Not on the road, though. He took them, rather, between the trees, deeper into the forest, through a clearing then back into the trees.
The soft ground of grass and moss made riding easier on her body. Hunger and exhaustion made it easy to drift into a light sleep, but each time she did, Xavier shifted, pulled her closer, and she'd jerk awake, not wanting to accept the comforts he offered now, only to be gone again when it suited him. They rode on in complete silence until the sun started to lift over the trees.
It seemed they headed in a mostly east direction, until they hit a wide river. At that point, Xavier turned them almost directly south, staying close to the roaring waters. The ground not even and often with deep muddy spots, the horse stumbled a bit, Xavier kept them going, though his arm wrapped tightly around her waist to hold her on. Another hour, and the waters stilled, the ground flattened and became more solid. Xavier's hold stayed firm, but before noon, he brought them to a stop.
Io took note of the area. Thick, lush grass, a few large oak trees, but it was the river that was most notable. The waters here were nearly still, which meant they were also very deep. Only a few large boulders disrupted the flow. The banks on both sides fell off, leaving a cascade of smooth rocks leading down into the water.
Io was still considering how perfect a place it would be to drown someone in this spot when Xavier dismounted and pulled her down. He pulled off the packs and the fur then, taking the horse's bridle, walked the animal to one of the trees and tied him them.
"Undress, Io," Xavier called as he unsaddled the beast. "Undress and get in the water. You need to wash." His hand brushed her arm as he passed, kneeling down by the packs and rummaging through them.
She needed to wash? Why? Perhaps he hoped to make her drowning look like an accident. No, that wasn't right. Xavier didn't want her dead. That was Neville and Charlotte. She searched the banks and the tree line across from her. Were they both waiting over there? No, that wasn't right, either. Neville was dead. She'd been the one to kill him when he'd tried to murder Xavier.
