He sighed. He had to stop thinking of her.
Maybe he should head to the club tonight. Get out of his own head. Find a brat to spank.
And pretend she was a certain sweet, absent-minded blonde-haired poppet.
Damn it. He needed to know she was all right. He walked back to his desk and grabbed his cell. If he called her, though, he might interrupt her work.
Instead, he brought up his brother’s name. The call went immediately to voicemail. That wasn’t unusual, Isaac wasn’t generally one for socializing. He often went days without returning a call.
His phone buzzed in his hand and he was surprised to see her name on the screen.
“Caley? Is everything all right?”
“Archer, umm, hi.”
“Hi, love.”
“I was calling because I received a new microwave and a washing machine/dryer combo.”
“Oh good, they arrived.”
“Archer, you shouldn’t have bought that for me. It’s too much.”
“It’s not too much. It’s entirely necessary. Did they set them up for you?”
“Umm, they set the washer up.”
“Let Issy set up the microwave, it’s too heavy for you to be carrying.”
“Oh, Issy isn’t here right now.”
“He’s not? Where is he?” he demanded.
The door to his office opened and his assistant walked in with a cup of coffee for him, but he ignored her.
“Has he gone into Bozeman for the day?” he asked when she didn’t answer.
“Uhh, no, he left.”
“He left?” he yelled.
He was aware of his assistant staring at him, wide-eyed. He gave her a wave to let her know everything was fine. Then he tuned her out.
“Love, what do you mean, he’s left?” he asked, forcing himself to speak calmly.
“I, uhh, Archer, you yelled.” She sounded completely shocked.
“Sorry, Caley, did I scare you?” He turned and saw his assistant still gaping at him. He gave her a small frown and she quickly turned and left.
“Umm, I just…I’ve never heard you yell.”
Why did he leave her? What the hell was he thinking? Had they had a fight? Why hadn’t he called Archer? He’d have…
Swooped in to save her.
Hero complex, much?
“He, umm, he got called into work.”
“Called into work? Someone on the ranch is ill?”
“Sort of,” she hedged.
“Caley,” he growled, not impressed at her half-answers.
“I’m not sure how much to say.”
“All of it,” he told her firmly. Damn it, why hadn’t Isaac called him?
“But Da—I mean Issy might get angry with me.” There was a lost note in her voice.
Poor baby.
“He won’t get angry with you,” he said soothingly. “If he gets angry at anyone, it will be me.”
“But I don’t want the two of you to argue again. I don’t like it when you argue.”
“You won’t know, because we aren’t going to argue in front of you again. Tell me, Caley.”
His voice was pure Dom now.
“He had to go to Colorado to help one of the guys who he works with. He got shot!”
Colorado? But the ranch was in Montana. And why would he have to go to help this guy? “Why didn’t he go to the hospital?”
“Apparently he doesn’t trust them. He doesn’t trust anyone to help him except Issy. That’s why he had to go.”
“And he just left you alone?” What was he thinking?
“I’ve lived by myself for years, Archer. A few days is fine. He’s coming back.” There was a note of uncertainty in her voice.
Damn it, Isaac! Didn’t he realize how vulnerable she was right now? If he left her too long, she could well convince herself that he wasn’t going to return. That he didn’t care about her as much as she did him. She could well decide that she was betraying her love for Dave by falling for Isaac.
He could lose her.
“Of course he’s coming back, love. Did he not tell you that?” If he hadn’t reassured her of that before he left…
“Archer, he wants me to move in with him. Before he left, he said he wanted me to move back to his home. With him. That he wouldn’t be leaving again without me with him. I…I…”
Holy shit. He could feel her panic from here. What was Issy thinking, laying that on her right before he left?
Jesus Christ.
“Poppet, breathe. Just breathe. It’s all right. He doesn’t expect that right away. That was just Issy’s way of telling you how serious he is about you. How much you mean to him.”
“What if I want that too?”
“What?” Whoops. He hadn’t actually meant to say that.
“What if I want to be with him. He’s only been gone half a day and already I miss him like crazy. I feel so lost. First you left, now him. I don’t know if I can be here on my own anymore. But it’s too soon, right? And what about Dave? How am I meant to leave here? Leave Dave? Leave it all? Archer, I…”
He heard her sniffle.
“Poppet, listen to me. It’s all right to have doubts. It’s okay to feel conflicted.”
“Is it? I feel like I’m being torn apart. To choose one option seems to disrespect how much I loved Dave. But to choose the other option, to not have Issy in my life, I’m not sure I can do that, Archer.”
“Because you love him.” He felt so happy for his brother. Yet at the same time, it was like his heart was breaking.
“I love him,” she said the words on an amazed breath. “It’s too early to feel that.”
“Nobody says there has to be a certain timeframe in which you fall in love.”
“Everyone says that. Everyone has an opinion.”
And she had experienced firsthand how much people’s opinions could hurt.
“Well, fuck them,” he said.
She drew in a breath. “Archer, you swore. First you yelled, then you swore. Are you sure you’re all right?”
He ran his hand over his face. “I’m fine, poppet. I miss you.”
“I miss you too,” she said quietly. “I’m scared, Archer. It’s not just letting go of Dave. It’s leaving here. It’s my safe place. It’s scary out there. I’m such a coward.”
“You are not a coward,” he said fiercely. “And I do not want to hear you call yourself that again, understand me?”
“O-okay.”
“You have every right to be scared after what you’ve been through. It’s understandable that you would be worried about leaving your home. It’s what is familiar to you. But, baby, you have to know that Isaac is not going to let anything happen to you.”
“He can’t be there to always protect me.”
“Not always, no. But it isn’t often that he leaves the ranch. And everyone on the ranch will be there to watch out for you.”
“But what if…what if they don’t like me or who I am?”
He was struck silent for a moment. “Has Issy not explained about Sanctuary?”
“Explained what? How most of the people who work for JSI live there?”
“That’s it?”
“Uhh, yes.”
“He left a bit out. Love, the majority of the men who live there are Daddy Doms. It’s a place where women are cherished and protected. If anyone ever made you feel bad about who you are, they’d be kicked off the ranch. And that’s probably after they got an ass kicking.”
“That’s…that’s…really?”
“Really, baby. I can’t believe Issy didn’t tell you all this.”
“I guess we’ve had other things going on.”
His brother was an idiot.
“I’m just scared. I’ve forgotten how to be around other people.”
“Then take it slowly. There’s no right way of doing this, Caley. You do what feels right for you. But I can guarantee that anyone who meets you will love you.”
Like he did. Fu
ck. He loved her.
She let out a shuddering breath. “You always know what to say to help me.”
“Hey, it’s my job,” he joked. He winced. Fuck. He shouldn’t have said that. He heard her breath hitch.
“Not that I think of you as a patient or anything. I didn’t mean it was a job to talk to you. I love talking to you, I just…” Shit. He hadn’t stumbled over his words like this since he was a teenager.
“It’s okay,” she said quietly. “I know what you mean. I like talking to you too.”
He let out a deep breath, trying to calm himself. “You can come to me about anything. I’m here for you. Issy is coming back. He would never leave you.”
“Sometimes people don’t have a choice.”
“No, they don’t,” he said with sympathy. “But you have to decide whether taking a risk is worth it. You can spend your life protecting yourself from all harm and hurt but never truly living. Or you can love, you can live, and you can risk loss. Caley, do you need me to come to you? I can.”
Only with a hell of a lot of reshuffling and probably a pissed-off assistant and patients. But he’d do it. For her.
“No, Archer, that’s all right. I know you have a lot to do there. And this conversation has helped more than you can know. A very wise man once told me that it was time to start living again. I think I should take his advice.”
“He does sound wise. And handsome, very handsome.”
Caley was giggling as she ended the call with Archer, placing the phone on the kitchen table as she looked over at the brand new microwave he’d bought her. It probably cost more than the rest of her appliances put together.
He was right, though. Lifting it herself wasn’t a smart idea. She grabbed her heat pack and put it in her old microwave. Her hands were aching a bit today and Issy wouldn’t be happy if she didn’t take care of them.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, bringing up Issy’s face. She missed him. She loved him. She wanted to be with him.
It was time to say goodbye.
There was only one way she could think to do that properly. Grabbing her jacket, she put it on. Then she put on her boots and stood.
She ignored the beeping of the microwave. She’d reheat her heat pack when she got back. This was more important.
Caley looked out across the small stream where she’d scattered Dave’s ashes. This was one of his favorite places to go. He claimed he thought better when he was here. So it had only been natural for this to be his final resting place.
She thought she’d probably keep this property. Maybe it could be their holiday cottage or something. She took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Archer was right, she’d always carry a piece of Dave with her. But if she didn’t take this chance with Issy, she’d always regret it.
“I love you, Dave. I always will. And I will never forget you. You were everything to me. My hero. My love. My Daddy. I hope you understand and that you approve of where my life is going now. I think you would. Not sure you’d like Isaac. But he takes care of me. He wouldn’t let anything hurt me. I think he loves me. I love him.” She crouched and pulled off her glove, running her fingers in the freezing cold water.
“Goodbye, my love.”
Turning, she started back down the dirt road, feeling lighter than she had in a long time. It was time for the next chapter.
It wasn’t until she was halfway back home that she smelled it. Smoke? Holy shit. Where was that coming from? She started moving faster. It was now growing dark. She’d forgotten her cell phone, not that she’d get much reception up here.
There was a gap in the trees, and she let out a loud cry as she saw the flames ahead of her.
Her cabin? Oh God. She raced forward, barely noticing the branches slapping at her, scratching her face. She tripped over a root of a tree, wrenching her ankle. But her fear and the adrenaline meant she didn’t even feel the pain. She stumbled on.
Bumbly! Her laptop! Her train set!
She reached for the front door, screaming in pain as the heat seared her skin. She got the door open, though, coughing as smoke assailed her. The back of the house was engulfed in flames.
Oh God. Oh God.
She attempted to make her way to her office, but the smoke was just too thick. The heat was so intense. She changed direction, moving to her bedroom. She screamed as the cabin creaked then the roof at the back collapsed.
Moving on instinct, she stumbled into her bedroom. She quickly grabbed Bumbly and her snuggly, disorientated, the smoke thick and insidious, she moved to the window, opening it, crying out as her hands protested.
She practically dived out the window then rolled away, right as the roof completely caved in. Taking just about everything she owned and cherished with it.
23
Caley coughed. Her lungs burned. There was a beeping noise that appeared to be in time with the throbbing in her head.
Something was over her mouth. She reached up, trying to bat it away, shocked to realize her hands wouldn’t work.
What was going on?
“Easy, Miss Ryan, you’re in the hospital. You have an oxygen mask over your face since you inhaled quite a bit of smoke. Your hands are bandaged up as well. Just relax. That’s it.”
She blinked, looking up into an older woman’s lined face. She appeared brisk, slightly tense but her eyes were kind.
“Hello, Miss Ryan. I’m Jenny, your nurse for this shift. You’re in the hospital in Bozeman.”
Bozeman? She was in Bozeman?
What had happened? She’d inhaled smoke?
Her cabin. Her cabin had caught on fire. Everything was gone. She whimpered, trying to speak.
“It might be hard to speak for a bit. You should just relax and concentrate on breathing. You’re safe in the hospital. You were airlifted here after someone called about the fire and the authorities arrived and found you. We’re trying to find a next of kin for you.”
She shook her head, worried they might call her parents.
“Easy. You can’t dislodge the oxygen mask. Everything is fine. Why don’t you go back to sleep?”
She got the feeling the nurse gave her something to help her sleep, because all at once a wave of drowsiness overcame her and she was out.
The next time she woke up, the throbbing in her head was slightly less. And she no longer seemed to have an oxygen mask on. Instead she could feel prongs in her nose belonging to oxygen tubes. She guessed that was progress.
She glanced around. She needed a drink of water desperately. She saw one sitting on the bedside table and reached for it, shocked to see the white bandages on her hands.
What had the nurse said? Had she burned her hands? She recalled opening the front door to her cabin and the heat searing her hands. Tears dripped down her cheeks.
Everything was gone.
At least you’re alive. No one was hurt.
The door opened and someone in dark pants and a light green dress shirt walked in. He was carrying a tablet in his hand. A nurse entered behind him.
“Ahh, Miss Ryan, you’re awake. Excellent. How are you feeling?”
She blinked at him.
“This is Doctor Reynolds,” the nurse explained kindly. “I’m Emily.”
She nodded. “My…my cabin?”
The doctor frowned. “I’m sorry. We don’t have information about that. I’m sure someone will be in touch about your home. We’re just here to assess your physical condition.”
The doctor was brisk. Not unkind. But her tender emotions couldn’t handle much right now. Tears dripped down her cheeks.
“Oh, honey, it’s all right. Are you in pain? Is it your hands?” Emily asked, moving closer. She looked to be in her sixties and spoke to her soothingly.
She shook her head. “No pain. Just my throat.”
“Smoke inhalation. We need to keep you in a few days to monitor you. Your hands have second-degree burns. I’m afraid they could take a while to heal. You’re going to need help when released.
Have you got someone who can take care of you?” the doctor asked.
“I…I…my phone was in the cabin.”
“Poor thing,” Emily sympathized. “We can call someone for you. Husband? Parents?”
She shook her head. “I can’t remember his phone number. My boyfriend.” She stopped to cough. “Maybe you could call his brother for me.”
Archer would be able to get hold of Issy. And maybe Archer would come himself.
“Of course.”
“Good. Good,” the doctor said. “You’re on pain relief for your hands. We’ll keep an eye on your oxygen levels. You were lucky, Miss Ryan. Too much smoke inhalation can kill.”
Lucky. Yeah, that’s how she felt.
Emily frowned.
Her stomach dropped. They’d had to google Archer’s name to find where he worked and call him since she didn’t know his private number by heart.
“Is he busy? Not there?”
“His assistant said he couldn’t take our call at the moment, but that she would leave him a note. I’m sure he’ll call back, dear.”
Of course he would. It was Archer.
“Could you also look up the number for Kent Jensen. Or JSI?” she asked. If they couldn’t get through to Archer, she’d have to call Issy’s boss.
“Right. I have a number here for JSI. Want me to call and ask for Kent Jensen?”
Emily hadn’t queried why they weren’t calling her family. Maybe she thought she had none. Which was actually pretty accurate.
“Yes, please,” she said after a moment. She felt bad about taking up the nurse’s time. But she was lost and alone.
Everything was gone.
Emily dialed the number and asked for Kent. “Yes. It’s for Caley Ryan.” She rattled off a number and hung up. “He’s in a meeting.”
Disappointment flooded her. But she couldn’t expect instant results. What would Issy do when he called and couldn’t get hold of her? He’d get mad then worried. She felt so terrible. What was she going to do? Her laptop was gone, although at least everything was saved to the cloud. But everything she had of Dave was gone. All her stuff.
Heal Me, Daddy (Montana Daddies Book 8) Page 21
