by AG Meiers
“Well, if you found that much to improve, then they aren’t doing their job.”
Jayden gave him another shy smile and shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe.”
They had talked for quite some time about Jayden’s projects, and the room was almost completely dark now. The warm, golden glow of the fire was the main source of light. Sven had moved next to Jayden to get a better view of his drawings, and he could smell that hint of vanilla that always seemed to follow Jayden around. They were standing so close. I could just reach out and touch him. Something must have given his thoughts away, because the silence stretching out between them was suddenly filled with awareness.
Jayden broke the spell. “Orla and Elliot will be back soon.” He shut down his laptop and then started to collect all the napkins.
“Let me help. We can—” Their hands brushed against each other, and Jayden drew a few deep breaths as if he was trying to steady his mind. The air felt thick and heavy. There was this undeniable current between them that seemed to be pulling them closer together.
“Jayden, at lunch, I think you misunderstood.”
“No, don’t apologize. It’s okay. I get it. All this. Perfect Match. All this wasn’t your idea, and here you are stuck with me.”
Oh no, this wouldn’t do. Sven didn’t want Jayden to brush off the attraction between them, so he blurted out, “Last night . . . last night was amazing.”
At first, both of them seemed frozen in time at Sven’s confession, but then Jayden gave a low moan. And at that moment, a pair of headlights swiped across the window and illuminated the room. A deep frown marred his face. Just as quickly, the headlight passed and it was dark again.
Sven swallowed a frustrated sigh. What was he missing? He wasn’t imagining the attraction between them, so surely Jayden should be in his arms right now—ecstatic at his admission. Wasn’t this what he had been pushing for all this time?
Maybe Sven had misread his reaction, but all his instincts told him that something was off. Wrong even. He simply couldn’t figure it out. At the same time, he felt this surge of protectiveness for Jayden again. Jayden had secrets and they were making him unhappy, and Sven had to find out what was going on.
Before he could say anything else, a key turned in the lock and the front door opened with its usual loud clank.
“Are you boys still here? Oh good. Elliot and I could use some help.” Orla’s cheerful voice took away Sven’s opportunity to ask questions.
When she walked by with the first set of shopping bags, she took one glance at Jayden and immediately gave Sven a deadly glare. Of course, she would pick up on the tension and uneasiness in his body language. Sven had a hard time remembering when Orla had last looked at him with full motherly disapproval. Maybe when he’d been suspended from high school for smoking. Oh shit. Orla clearly blamed him for Jayden’s unhappiness, and she sure as hell would call him out on it if she had a chance.
Despite the late hour, Orla insisted on making dinner. She also made a pot of her special tea and gave Jayden a huge cup and, no surprise, Sven wasn’t offered any. With another pointed glance, she dragged him into the kitchen.
Orla barely waited until the door closed behind them to rail into him. “Sven, what happened? Jayden is miserable. I leave you alone for a few hours . . .”
He lifted his hands “Honestly, I’m not sure. Something has Jayden rattled, and it’s not me.”
Orla crossed her arms over her chest. “Not you? Really?”
“Well, maybe not just me,” Sven admitted. “I might have said a few stupid things earlier, but we were okay just now. I promise. All was okay. We talked about this baking website before you came back. Everything was fine. I . . . There’s something else going on.”
Elliot walked into the kitchen, and to Sven’s surprise, he gave Orla a stern look. “Stop interfering, Orla. These are two grown men. Let them figure it out.” Sven got a quick pat on the back and a push toward the door.
Orla glared at Elliot. Still, she managed to stop Sven before he could make it out the door. “Sven, be nice to Jayden. I didn’t get him to come up here all by himself to be miserable. Make an effort. Take him places. Show him around. He’s a good kid and deserves some lo . . .” Her voice faltered, but she steadied herself with a deep breath. “He deserves some happiness. At least for a few days.”
Sven nodded and walked through the swinging door, back into the main room.
“Everything okay?” Jayden asked. He was standing at the bar refilling his cup.
“Yeah, everything is fine. Orla just had a few ideas for tomorrow if the rain stops,” Sven lied. Had Jayden heard anything through the door?
“It’s supposed to ease up in the next few days. I checked the forecast.” Jayden’s voice was a little stiff, but he managed a smile.
Elliot walked back in. “Maybe you boys can hike up Cold Creek Mountain. There’s a trail starting right behind the lodge.”
“Yeah, we’d need the ground to dry off, but it’s an awesome view from the top,” Sven supplied as he grabbed the remotes to turn on a hockey game. Orla came in a few minutes later, and they all settled down for dinner. Jayden sipped quite a bit from his potent tea. He even went for another refill. His complexion and his mood seem to be recovering with every sip. Sven didn’t say anything; he liked a slightly tipsy Jayden a whole lot more than the pale ghost from earlier.
By the time they got back to the cabin, it was later than usual and Jayden was swaying just a little bit, so Sven quickly got firewood to make sure they had some in the morning, and then they both fell into bed.
“Tired?” Sven asked.
“Exhausted.” Jayden’s reply came out slurred. Then his head popped up. “Maybe . . . Sven, can you get drunk from tea?”
Sven couldn’t help a small snort. Jeez, what had Orla packed into the tea tonight? Looked like Jayden was sloshed. “You can from Orla’s tea. Didn’t you taste the whiskey?”
“Wasn’t whiskey. It was sweet and yummy.”
Sven chuckled. “Go sleep it off. Let’s hope you’re not miserable tomorrow morning.”
Jayden let out a sigh and crawled deeper under the covers. They both turned quiet. Sven hadn’t gotten much sleep last night and had gotten up pretty early. Yeah, he was procrastinating again, but Sven would ask Jayden about the strange call with Perfect Match tomorrow. Jayden was a bit of a mess tonight. It wasn’t the best time for a serious discussion.
“Sven.” Jayden turned toward him. “Are you asleep?”
“Yes,” Sven answered, because hell he was exhausted.
“There is something I want to tell you,” Jayden whispered. His voice was so low that Sven had to move closer to hear him.
“I didn’t know what to expect coming here, but I didn’t expect to like it this much. Your family is great, and I really like spending time with you. I just wanted you to know, okay? Whatever happens, I just want you to know that . . .” Jayden’s sentence trailed out, but before Sven could respond, he added, “I wish—” And then he stopped again.
“You wish?” Sven asked.
“Nothing. It’s silly. Sorry, I’m keeping you awake. Good night.”
Sven gave Jayden’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. Then with City Boy lying next to him, he quickly fell asleep.
Sven woke up out of a deep sleep. The relentless drumming of the rain on the roof had stopped. It was blissfully silent and there was even a bit of moonlight coming through the window as proof that the clouds had cleared for now. It took him a minute to shake off his drowsiness and notice a restless Jayden next to him, twisting and turning. And it sounded like he was counting.
A minute later, Jayden whispered, “Please just stay asleep. Please, please,” as he crawled out of bed.
Sven froze as he feigned sleep.
Jayden crept through the cabin. Maybe he was getting sick from too much alcohol in his system. He’d be all embarrassed if he knew he’d woken up Sven.
But Jayden didn’t slip into the bathroom. Instead, he seemed to move
something around in the cabin. It was so bizarre that Sven gave up all pretense of sleep and turned on the reading light on his nightstand. Jayden was crouched down in front of the fireplace, where he apparently had been stacking the wood against the side of the wall. Jayden dropped the log he was holding, and it fell to the ground with a low thunk. Then, he just stood there in the middle of the scattered pile of wood.
“What are you doing? Why are you out of bed?” Sven asked, his voice drowsy from sleep. He tried to wrap his head around what was going on, and for a few seconds they just stared at each other.
“I am not crazy,” Jayden finally said in a hoarse whisper.
Sven scrambled out of bed and walked over. “What? Of course not. What’s going on?”
“I didn’t mean to wake you up. I’m sorry. It’s just…the logs are blocking the exit route. In case of a fire. It’s not safe. We should be able to reach the door at all times. You should know that—” Jayden froze. His eyes lowered. Then he shook his head, and looked straight at Sven. “I’m not crazy.” There was a strange defiance in his voice.
“Hey, relax, Jay.” Sven pulled him closer. “Nobody thinks you’re crazy.” Even all prickly, underneath Jayden seemed shaky and vulnerable.
Sven lifted his hand and softly stroked Jayden’s cheek. “I saw your suitcase and the drawer, and I know you like things organized. Let me help you with the wood. You don’t have to explain anything, you know, but I wish you’d told me earlier that this would bother you.” He stepped around Jayden and grabbed the first logs within reach to put them away. Beside him, Jayden also picked up another log, but he must have grabbed it wrong, and it slid through his hands. He winced. “Everything is going wrong today.”
All amusement left Sven in a heartbeat. “What happened? Baby, you’re okay?”
“I’m okay.” But instantly Jayden muttered, “‘Baby’? ‘Baby’! He called me ‘baby.’ So, not okay.”
“Huh? Calling you ‘baby’ is not okay?”
“No.” Jayden’s eyes went wide. “‘Baby’ is totally okay.”
Sven chalked Jayden’s muttering up to Orla’s tea, and quickly stacked the last pieces of wood. Then he tugged Jayden along with him to the small bathroom.
“Let me see.” He took Jayden’s hand and held it close to the light. “Just a few splinters.”
Jayden’s hands were shaking slightly as Sven removed the splinters and wiped antiseptic over his hand. His eyes followed Sven’s every move. The small shivers running through Jayden’s body were a bit worrisome, so Sven rushed to get him back to bed. He threw some more wood on the fire and directed the lamp toward the ceiling to diffuse the light.
“Okay now?” he asked as he tugged the quilt around Jayden with a few awkward moves and then lay down beside him. Jayden immediately snuggled closer and pressed against Sven.
“I’m a complete sucker for your warm body,” he mumbled. That was clearly still the tea talking, because it was immediately followed by mild outrage. “You laughed at me, you bastard.”
“‘Escape route’? Really?” Sven tilted Jayden’s face up and pressed a kiss to his forehead. He looked like he could use it. And shit, after today, Sven could use it too. The fire started to warm up the room. The cabin was silent, except for the occasional hissing from burning logs.
“I never said thank you, but I liked what you did with my drawer,” Sven whispered and then gently kissed Jayden’s lips. Jayden melted against him. There was no heat in their kiss, just tenderness and comfort. When they finally broke it, Jayden let out a low sigh and buried his face against Sven’s collarbone. His breath ghosted over Sven’s neck. He was muttering again. It sounded a lot like Could this guy be any more freaking perfect? before he raised his head for another kiss.
For a few minutes they simply stayed tangled up in each other, but eventually Sven pulled away. Instead, he tucked Jayden into a tight embrace. “Want to talk to me?”
“Not much to say. I just . . . I don’t like mess. I like everything to have a spot. Everything should have a spot where it belongs, and then, you know, it should be in that place. Sorting things, fixing things, and cleaning up makes me feel good. It calms me down. It’s really not so bad, but people act differently once they know. They watch me. Wait for me to act weird, or worse, they go out of their way to make me comfortable.” Jayden said the last word with ironic emphasis. “All my teachers in school had me sit in the first row, so that I wouldn’t get distracted by the other kids in the classroom. Stupid stuff like that. They should have simply branded weirdo on my forehead.”
Jayden went silent, but Sven didn’t push for more. He would let Jayden tell him whatever he was ready to share. Battling his anxiety in a foreign environment couldn’t be easy. Opening up and talking about it was probably even harder.
For a while they just quietly laid next to each other, but then Jayden continued, “In college, for six glorious weeks, I was normal. Just another freshman sharing a room on campus. Brian was actually a decent roommate. We had a few classes together and started to become friends. And then I fucked up. One night I had an anxiety attack over some stupid assignment and collected all of Brian’s dirty laundry in the room to put it into the laundry basket. It was totally stupid and I knew it, but I just couldn’t help it. That’s when the whispering started. Brian filed a complaint for invasion of privacy. He claimed I was going through his stuff. Which wasn’t true. It wasn’t.” The desperation in Jayden’s voice was audible. “I was diagnosed yet again and assigned a single room. Everything changed after that.” Jayden pushed himself up and looked at Sven. “I’m not crazy. Usually I have myself fairly under control. I have some coping techniques and breathing exercises. It’s more difficult when I’m in a strange environment or under stress—” He stumbled to correct himself. “That’s not what I meant. Everybody here has been great. I mean—”
Sven lifted Jayden’s chin and cut him off with a kiss. He hoped that a kiss went a whole lot further than any words to assure Jayden that everything was fine between them. Sven didn’t need more explanations, and he sure as hell didn’t need any apologies. This had been their most intimate and honest moment since Jayden had arrived.
There was silence between them now, but it didn’t feel awkward or uncomfortable. They simply lay next to each other. At last, Jayden’s breathing evened out, and he fell asleep in Sven’s arms.
Perfect Match Commitment #11:
Quality over quantity. If you are tired of meaningless one-night stands and depressive dates, let us find the partner of your dreams. You deserve only the best.
Jayden stood on a large boulder on top of the mountain and pulled in another lungful of air. It felt like the first real deep breath he’d taken in weeks. The wind whipped around him. Clouds chased across the sky, but there were also patches of blue. Midday sun warmed his skin. From his small plateau, he could see higher mountains in the distance and had a perfect view of Cold Creek Station. The buildings looked small, like toy houses, and were half-hidden in the trees. A little farther away, the overflowing river rushed through the valley.
It was his seventh day in Cold Creek, and the rain had finally stopped, so they’d gone on a hike up Cold Creek Mountain. The climb hadn’t been easy. Jayden had thought himself fit after a few weeks in the gym. But when he’d labored breathlessly behind a slowly and steadily climbing Sven, who hadn’t even broken a sweat on the trail, he’d felt all kinds of humiliated. Once they’d finally reached the summit though, he’d quickly forgotten about the strenuous ascent.
Jayden explored the rocky peak, while Sven unpacked a small picnic on a flat rock, out of the wind. When Jayden joined him, he realized that Sven had also brought him a warm flannel shirt. The thought that Sven had expected him to be a sweaty mess after the three-hour hike was embarrassing all over again. Jayden’s grumbled thank-you had Sven smirking, but then Jayden got him right back by stripping off his sweat-stained T-shirt and parading around half-naked for a few minutes despite the ice-cold wind, before scam
pering back to the top. Sven’s heated glance was so worth freezing his nipples.
There hadn’t been any sex since the firewood incident, which was frustrating. In general, Sven was nice to him—always friendly and nerve-rattlingly nice, but he’d made no further attempts to get into Jayden’s pants. In fact, more and more frequently, Sven had sent him off to Orla’s kitchen. It was almost as if he’d decided to give both of them a few days of peace.
Perfect Match had been checking in regularly. Both Alex and Jackson had reached out to him via email and text to discuss exit strategies, but Jayden had given them only evasive answers. He knew he had to figure out how to get Sven to hate him at some point, but not right now.
“Do you want more coffee before I pack up?” Sven called from their picnic spot. He was leaning against a large rock, enjoying the sun, and looked completely at home in their rugged surroundings.
“Thanks, I’m good,” Jayden replied while he tried to climb up one of the huge boulders to get another glimpse of the river from a different angle.
“Careful, City Boy. Don’t want you to fall and break a leg. Rescue would have a field day if they had to evac us from Cold Creek Mountain right behind the station. We’d never live that down.”
Jayden flipped him off, which made Sven laugh.
“Ready to go back down? The clouds are moving in again.”
From his lofty spot, Jayden could see Sven starting to gather their stuff. “Yes, we can leave. Can I help you pack up?”
“Nah, all good. Take your time. No need to rush.”
Good. Because he didn’t really want to stop his explorations. There was something freeing in being so high up on top of the world. Plus he was trying to draw out his time with Sven after being ignored the last few days. That wasn’t really a fair assessment, but somehow he’d developed a Sven addiction and couldn’t get enough of the grumpy forester. Like this morning, when for the first time he’d woken up before Sven with his body draped over Sven’s chest, their legs tangled, and Sven snoring softly into his ear.
