Jon opened the door for me and took my hand to pull me out. His gaze went to the campus around us. The tall brick building with rows and rows of windows where we’d be living—me on an even floor and him on an odd one.
“Home sweet home,” he said.
This building would never be home, but standing next to Jon, tucked underneath his arm, I realized I had a piece of home with me.
I leaned my head against his shoulder, taking it all in, and he kissed the top of my head. “Everything’s going to change,” he said.
A girl who only looked a year or two older than us approached, wearing a blue polo with the Upton mascot—the vaquero, cowboy—right above her big breasts. Like, massive. How was she standing up? “Are you in the A building?” she asked.
I followed Jon’s eyes, hoping they were going the right direction, and grinned when I saw he smiled at her face. “We are.”
She took us to the big stand where they were checking people in, and part of me cringed at the fact that I was checking into my dorm at what equated to a lemonade stand. Like, Welcome to college, that will be $50,000. But I kept it to myself. With some effort.
Jon and I got our room keys. I would be on the tenth floor, since freshmen had to room higher up, and he’d be on the ninth. It wasn’t right next door, but pretty close.
We held up our keys and snapped a selfie to send to his parents and Grandma. After we pocketed our phones, we grabbed a cart and got started.
“We’ll get your stuff in first,” he said.
“We can do yours first,” I offered.
His eyes narrowed. “You’re putting off meeting your roommate, aren’t you?”
I stood up on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek, nibbled on his earlobe.
“So that’s a yes?” he mumbled. “I don’t even care.”
Someone a few feet off yelled at us to get a room.
Jon whispered against my lips, “What does it look like we’re doing?”
I smiled and pulled back. “So, you first?”
A chuckle started low in his throat and spilled over his lips. “Nope.” His eyes had lost that hazy look that came whenever our bodies talked instead of our words. He took hold of the cart and wheeled it toward the front of my car. “You can do this. She will love you, and you’ll love her, and it will be great. Maybe she’ll even be the maid of honor at our wedding.”
I stood frozen. “Did you just say...”
At first, he looked confused. Then understanding crossed his expression, then bashfulness. “Too soon?”
Smiling, I shook my head. Especially since I’d been thinking those thoughts all summer.
We made quick work of unloading my things, stacking them all up in one pile. Jon walked on one side, me on the other to make sure the suitcase tower didn’t topple, and started our march inside. My throat got tighter the closer we got to room 1009. To whatever or whoever waited behind the door.
“You go in first,” I whispered. “Make sure she hasn’t painted the walls black or anything.”
He gave me an exasperated smile but obliged, pushing the door open. “Hey,” he said. “You look familiar.”
Chapter Eighteen
A voice came back, kind and clear. “You’re Jon Scoller, right? From Woodman? I went to Roderdale.”
Curiosity got the best of me, and I followed him into the room. A girl with bright blue eyes and brown hair knotted on top of her head stood on one side of the room, boxes stacked around her. Good thing I didn’t have much, because I wasn’t sure how our stuff and both of us were supposed to fit in the small room.
“Are you my roommate?” she asked, a nervous edge to her voice.
The fact that maybe she was as scared as I was immediately set me at ease. “I guess so. I’m Abi.”
“Anika.”
An awkward silence hung between us. What now?
“Why don’t you guys get to know each other?” Jon suggested. “I’ll go park your car?”
“Are you sure?” I asked. “I can come help.”
“Yep.” He stuck his hands out for my keys, and in moments, it was me, Anika, and a twelve by twelve room with cinderblock walls—painted white.
“I wanted to wait for you before picking a side.” She gestured between the two loft beds. “Do you have a preference?”
Honestly, each side was a mirror of the other. I shook my head.
“Me either.”
I dropped my backpack on the bed farthest from the door and unzipped it. So maybe the notes had me on edge. As I took out my school supplies and put them on the generic desk under my bed, I searched my mind for something—anything to say to Anika. There had to be something.
“Was that your boyfriend?” she asked. “He’s cute.”
I turned to gauge her expression. It seemed neutral, but maybe there was something hiding underneath? Maybe she liked him. Who wouldn’t like Jon? “Yeah, he is. Are you dating anyone?” Please say yes.
“Yeah, Kyle Rayford,” she answered. Her smile said she was happy about it, but there was a bitter sweetness in the tightness of her eyes that made me wonder if there was a story there. “Do you know him?”
My mind jumped back to the first football game I watched and how Stormy thought Kyle had a great backside. “Um, I’ve heard of him.”
She climbed onto her bed, even though it didn’t have any sheets on it and was probably covered with other people’s germs and... I shuddered. Something that rhymed with germs. Gross.
I wanted to say something, but awkward Abi from a year ago took over. My throat felt dry, and all I wanted was a chocolate-coated granola bar and a sugary soda to give me a feel-good sugar boost. Instead, I got busy unpacking my suitcases and totes, trying not to think about food or if Anika was watching me or if she would like me or if this would be the most awkward year of my life. And that was saying something. I’d had a lot of awkward years. I used to have Bieber Fever, for crying out loud.
I was up on my bunk, trying to put on a fitted sheet without breaking my neck, when Anika spoke next.
“Oh my gosh,” she said. “We match.”
“Huh?” It didn’t look like we were wearing the same clothes.
She dug through one of her suitcases and pulled out the exact same sheets I had on my bed.
I laughed. “I guess you have good taste?”
“Or I saw the same sale at Target you did.” She giggled.
“Accurate.” In a final ugly grunt, I got the last corner of the sheet over my mattress and climbed down the ladder. Then I threw my flat sheet and comforter over the bunk and stood back to take it in. Anika’s side of the room, still in boxes, and my side, an echo of the room I had at Grandma’s.
“What are you doing tonight?” she asked.
I shrugged. “Jon and I hadn’t talked about it.”
“Want to go to the freshmen pancake feed?”
“Are they trying to fatten us up for slaughter?”
She laughed. “You’re funny.”
My cheeks warmed, and I mumbled a thanks.
“I think it’s just to introduce us to people.” She shrugged.
Jon walked in at that moment. “You’re not gonna believe this.”
Then, the second most handsome guy I’d seen in my life followed him into the room and announced, “We’re roommates too.”
Anika’s face split into a grin as she sat up. “No way.”
Jon nodded.
“That’s amazing,” I said.
Jon winked at me. “Looks like it will be easy to get some privacy.”
Curse my damn pale skin for showing just how much the idea of privacy with Jon got to me. This was college. No rules.
The handsome guy, who had to be Anika’s boyfriend, went and leaned against Anika’s lofted bed, arms folded across his muscular chest.
I finally gathered myself enough to speak. “How did that even happen? This is too weird.”
Kyle shrugged. “Apparently, they try to put athletes together. If they can.”
> I turned to Anika. “Are you out for track?”
She shook her head. “You must be leftovers.”
I shrugged. I had signed up for the team late in the season.
Jon wrapped his arms around me. “Never.” He dropped a kiss on top of my head, and I closed my eyes against his touch. I loved it. Loved him.
“So, what are y’all doing tonight?” Kyle asked.
Jon looked at me. “I’m taking my girl out.”
The words just fell off his lips, but they torpedoed my heart. His girl. I liked the sound of that.
“Starting when?” I asked.
He took my hand. “Now.”
Chapter Nineteen
We walked together to his car, which was parked so far away, we practically needed a map and some snacks to get there.
He grabbed the handle with one hand and bent over with his other hand on his knee. “It was a tough run, but I’d like to thank my mom and dad for always supporting me, my girlfriend for letting me walk behind her from time to time, and my Lord and—”
“Unlock the door, Jon!” I laughed.
Chuckling, he hit the button and we climbed inside. As he pulled away from the college, I asked, “So, what are we doing?”
He smiled over at me. “Up for a little adventure?”
I would be up for anything with him. He could suggest a marathon over a bed of hot coals, and I’d run it twice if it meant more time with him. But I just said, “Sure. Anywhere’s good with me.”
My phone dinged with a notification.
Grandma: Do you know your new address yet?
I sent it to her with my room number, and then I copied and pasted it into the friends group text.
Abi: In case one of you is nice enough to send a package. Or magical pants that can fit both Evan’s skinny ass and mine. Whatever works.
Stormy: Laughing Emoji. You’re more likely to get the pants.
Abi: Ouch.
Andrew: What about us? They don’t even have Dairy Queen here.
Evan: Crying emoji. Baby emoji.
Andrew: Heyyyy.
“My phone’s blowing up,” Jon said. He took it out of his pocket and gave it a quick glance. “Group text?”
I tilted my head and gave him a smile. “What else?”
His hand settled on my thigh, rubbing up and down, sending sparks to my core.
Frank: Can we go back to the part about Abi getting in Freckles’s pants? Smug face emoji.
Macy: I don’t think Jon would like that.
Michele: Side-eye emoji.
Macy: Or junior over there.
Abi: Blushing emoji. Just kidding. Gah.
Frank: Uh huh. Winking emoji.
Abi: Eye roll emoji.
Abi: Going on a date with my ACTUAL boyfriend. Peace sign emoji.
Stormy: Love you chica. Have fun. Call me tomorrow to tell me all about it.
Skye: Same here. I know your roommate. She’s AWESOME.
Skye: Love you.
Abi: :) Love you both.
The car slowed, and I looked up to see Jon turning onto an access road that looked like it hadn’t been repaved in decades.
“What is this?” I asked.
“We’re not there yet.”
“Good.”
“What happened to ‘anywhere’s good with me’?”
I laughed. “Did I say that?”
He rolled his eyes at me and kept driving. “That’s what I thought.”
When he turned again, we were on a dirt road, dust billowing behind Jon’s car. Rows and rows of crops passed outside my window. “We are officially in BFE. The middle of nowhere. The boonies. The—"
“I get it, I get it!” Jon laughed. “I heard the team does practices out here sometimes. Thought we could check it out.”
A nervous flutter swept through my stomach at the mention of our new team, replacing my humor from earlier. We were collegiate athletes now. Wow. But you would think Upton would have better facilities. “We practice in a corn field?”
“I mean, I think we do our long runs along the road,” Jon said. “It has lots of hills, and some big donor to the college owns this land.”
There was a turnoff alongside the road that was too big to be a trail but too small to be a real parking lot. Slowly, he took his car off the gravel and onto the area carved into the field. He got out of the car and went to the trunk. I stood beside my door, taking it in. The midday sun beat down on us, every bit as hot as I’d expect it to be in August. Beads of sweat already formed on my skin, a bare echo of what would be there if our coaches had us run out here anytime soon.
Jon closed the trunk and walked my way, a bag slung over his shoulder. When he reached me, he took my hand in his.
“You sure you don’t mind sweaty hands?” I asked.
He lifted our interlaced fingers and kissed right below my knuckles. “Is that what I’m calling you now? Because if so, I love Sweaty Hands.”
I giggled and shoved him away, but his hand stayed latched in mine.
“How do you know it’s you sweating?” he asked.
“I just know.”
He shook his head. “What do you think of Anika?”
“She seems nice.” I shrugged. “I don’t really know her yet. What about Kyle?”
“Seems cool,” Jon said. “He’s out for the football team.”
“Ah.”
“Weird that we got put together, huh?” he asked.
“The weirdest. Skye says she knows Anika.”
“That’s cool. You’ll have to ask her for all of Anika’s deep, dark secrets.”
I winked at him. “One step ahead of you.”
“You usually are. Thank God.” He winked right back.
I laughed, even though he was ridiculous. And wrong.
He’d beaten me to a first real relationship. Had college figured out first. Healed from his trauma first. Knew his passion first. And with all of his comments about the other kind of passion, I couldn’t help but be glad he hadn’t lost his virginity yet. We had to be level on some playing field.
Jon just seemed so evolved. So comfortable in his own skin. Even though I knew I was still healing, I craved that kind of self-confidence, the kind that rarely cracked or faltered. Was desperate for it.
Almost as much as I was desperate for some shade and a massive glass of ice water.
I fanned my face with my free hand. “How far are we walking?”
The sound of vehicles from the nearby road had already faded, and we were now surrounded by sparse trees and a blanket of patchy grass growing in dapples of sunlight.
“I’m just looking for...” His eyes lit up. “There.” He pointed at an area with no distinguishable features, as far as I could tell, and veered off the path.
“What?” I asked, nearly stumbling over a root.
“Two trees close enough together for this.” He patted his duffle bag. “I brought a hammock.”
My lips lifted into an easy smile. Jon, me, and a hammock? Talk about paradise.
Here in the shade, the temperature felt at least twenty degrees cooler, and a soft breeze had this little spot feeling almost comfortable.
I watched Jon as he put up the hammock, my eyes following his lean arms and shoulder muscles flexing through his thin T-shirt as he stretched and twisted. Sweat darkened his light brown hair and dripped down the curve of his chin. I wanted to kiss the drops, taste the saltiness, feel his skin under my lips.
He tested the straps, pushed the hammock back and forth, and then flopped into the fold, swinging rapidly and then slowing down.
I smiled at him, and he opened his arms wide, an invitation for me to claim my spot. He didn’t need to ask twice. I fell into his arms, into his warmth, and snuggled in.
“This is perfect,” I breathed, settling into the feeling of pure bliss.
His lips touched the top of my head, feather light, and he let out a contented breath.
We rocked back and forth for a little bit before Jon said, �
��I need to tell you something.”
My heart froze at those words, and my entire body tensed. “What?”
Jon must have sensed my nerves because he kissed my head again, right where my hair met my forehead. Once, twice, three times. And then he said into my hair, “Remember where we were a year ago?”
I nodded cautiously. I’d been in my parents’ house, living in the real-world version of hell, ruled by two demons who had devils of their own to answer for. Jon had been in Woodman, starting his senior year. A life with him—or someone like him—had been nowhere on my radar. It was a future as laughable as me walking on the moon.
He spoke softly into my hair. “I was just going through the motions… school, cross-country, home, sleep. And then you sat next to me on the bus.” He kissed my temple, and my skin heated under his mouth. “You were so scared. I could see it in your eyes, even though you were trying to be strong, and I was...lost.” He sighed. “I don’t know how, but I knew I needed you. In a way I’d never needed anyone before, and it scared me.”
He’d never told me that before. Confusion brought my eyebrows together, and I lifted up to look at him. “What are you trying to say?”
“I’m trying to say I’m sorry.” With his eyes somewhere in the past, he brushed a few loose strands of hair back behind my ears. “You know when you’re on the verge of right where you’re supposed to be, and you feel like you’re not good enough?”
I recognized it as if I’d given birth to it. Every second, every moment of my life since moving to Woodman to live with Grandma, I felt that way. I lived with a woman who loved me, was in a relationship with Jon Scoller, had a track scholarship at a D1 college, good friends I group texted with. It was everything I’d dreamed of when I was locked in my room, burying my feelings in layers of comfort food, attempting to escape my parents.
Jon sighed. “The more I got to know you—fell in love with you—the more scared I became. I thought if I was the one to push you away, if I went another direction, dated another girl, I could end how I felt about you on my own terms, rather than watch it all blow up in my face. I almost lost everything. This.”
Abi and the Boy Who Lied Page 5
