Although she tried to forget it, Whitney fell asleep still trying to place all the people from the field. The puzzle just didn’t fit together and just when she’d thought she kind of understood Millersburg.
◆◆◆
The next morning Whitney woke to beautiful sunshine flooding through her tall windows. Whitney’s room when she woke the next day. For a moment she panicked, sure she was late for some game or practice, her heart slowing, and then sinking when she remembered she actually had nothing to do. Unable to find hope in the day, she pulled herself from bed and headed downstairs for coffee.
“Mom said I had to tell you I’m having friends over and you can to. Pool party!” Mable spewed in her direction as she flew past her on the stairs. While she filled her coffee cup Whitney debated inviting over her new “friends.” She wasn’t sure if they’d come, but she decided to take a risk anyways.
Whitney called Brynley, Everley and Ivy in that order. Brynley and Everley said they’d be over around one; Ivy wasn’t allowed to come. In an awkward exchange, Ivy sounded excited about the invite when Whitney asked, but her mom’s voice turned sour at the mention of Whitney’s name. Through the phone Whitney heard muffled pleads from Ivy and stern denials from her mom until finally Ivy returned to say she wouldn’t make it. The call was odd, but Whitney was too anxious about Everley and Brynley’s arrival to spend very much time stressing about it.
Mable and her two friends were already splashing around like crazy animals on the near side of the pool, when the older girls arrived, so Whitney led them across the intricately stamped concrete deck, to the far side. They set their towels on three of the loungers adorning the deck and sat on the edge of the pool letting their feet dangle in the crystal clear water. Whitney stared out past her yard and let her gaze settle on the cows in the near field. More countryside than she’d seen in her whole life surrounded her new house and while she never anticipated liking it, she did. She found it peaceful, a feeling she rarely held with her dad around.
“This pool is amazing! I thought you meant you had like a free-standing pool,” Everley said, bringing Whitney back to reality.
“What’s a free-standing pool?”
Brynley and Everley exchanged a look before Brynley answered in a tone usually reserved for children. “A pool that isn’t in-ground.”
“Do people have those here?”
“Yeah. Most people with a pool have those. In-ground pools are really expensive,” Brynley said.
“Everyone in California probably has these pools, huh?” Everely asked.
“Yeah, mostly,” Whitney whispered. She stared into the fields again, growing increasingly aware of the fact that in Millersburg she was in fact, rich.
Everley broke the silence after a few minutes, “Did you have fun at the game last night?”
“Yeah,” Whitney said, “it was really fun.”
“Where’d you guys go afterwards? I was talking to James and when I turned around you were gone,” Brynley said.
“We were over with Ivy’s family by the end zone,” Everley said.
“Were those little kids running around and playing with Ivy her siblings?” Whitney asked.
“Uh, yeah. All the wild blonde kids belong to them,” Everley said.
Whitney splashed her toes in the water trying to appear only mildly interested. “Does her whole family always come to the games?”
“Pretty much every player’s family comes,” Brynley said. “Only really poor kids with parents who are on drugs or working at night don’t have family at the game. I feel bad for them sometimes….” Whitney was learning that Brynley never lacked an opinion about anyone. Yet she usually tried to rationalize her harsh statements with an air of pity. Whitney would learn this wasn’t uncommon in Millersburg.
“Who plays from Ivy’s family?” Whitney asked.
“Leif,” They both said at the same time, heads snapping towards Whitney.
Slowly the pieces fell into place. Ivy’s family was supporting Leif. Leif was Ivy’s brother. The blonde hair. The blue eyes. The way he acted with Everley. It made so much sense, yet she didn’t want it to. She couldn’t be obsessed with her friend’s brother.
The thoughts kept circling her head as her toe circled in the water. When she finally looked up she found both girls still staring at her.
“That makes sense now,” Whitney finally said. “That’s why you guys always joke in math.”
“Yeah. I thought you knew that. And Jasmine is their sister,” Everley said, casually dropping a second bomb.
“What?? Jasmine is Ivy’s sister?” Whitney blurted out before she could filter her response to remain cool. She couldn’t stand Jasmine and she was nothing like Ivy…or Leif.
“How do you not know this?” Brynley asked.
“Um, I just moved here.”
Whitney was now more confused about Eva than ever before.
“What’s up with Eva and Leif? Are they together?”
“Who knows?” Everley said.
While Everley seemed blind to the reason Whitney was asking, no crush flew under Brynley’s radar and she immediately perked up like a cat ready to pounce.
“Why do you care?”
“I don’t really,” Whitney said, “I just saw them together last night and they looked like a couple but they are both in drama and they don’t really act like a couple there so I was confused.”
“Well, they are and they aren’t. Their parents grew up here together. She is best friends with Jasmine and everyone bugged them to date until Leif finally asked her out like two years ago. So then they started dating and everyone thought they were so perfect together, but she is so mean to him. Things started falling apart early last year and finally in August he told her he wanted to take a break. She apparently cried a lot, and then just kept going over to their house to “hang out with Jasmine” and ending up crying in Leif’s room almost daily. I think he’s totally over it, but he can’t get rid of her.” Brynley said. Happy to again be the knower of all. “Plus, she goes to all these college parties and gets drunk and does who-knows-what with whoever she finds and everyone knows it, yet she acts like it isn’t true. It is so rude to Leif.” She lowered her voice at the end like the last part was gossip, while the rest hadn’t been.
Nodding, Whitney felt the story circling inside of her like a storm. Leif was with Eva, kinda. But Eva was awful to him. Yet she’d still never hold a candle to a senior.
Reading her mind, Brynley looked over at Whitney and in her most charming voice said, “You like Leif, don’t you?”
“No,” Whitney said. “He’s a junior and I don’t even know him, how could I like him?”
“Yeah, okay. We believe you,” Brynley said, a huge knowing grin covering her face.
Whitney wanted to believe it as much as she wanted them to believe it. She needed to not like him. She honestly couldn’t figure out why she did like him so much, she’d never even talked to him. Plus, he wouldn’t ever like her and if her dad taught her anything it was not to chase unobtainable things.
◆◆◆
After the girls left, Brynley to a date with James and Everley off to a gig with her band, Whitney retreated to her room to do some serious internet stalking. She hunted down first Brynley, then Ivy, then Jasmine, then Eva and finally Leif on Instagram. She scrolled through their pictures with the same awe she felt while watching Harry Potter. Her summer Instagram showed days spent at the yacht club, their beach house, the stables and of course, her summer traveling basketball team. These all showed hikes through the woods, tractors, and groups of girls laying by a murky looking reservoir. Whitney stared at the pictures until the tears blurred her vision of them. The last few days, she’d actually felt like she fit in with these people, but who was she kidding. She was nothing like these people. No wonder Ivy didn’t like her, she thought.
Whitney stared at the things in her room. The pictures she’d hung up of her friends and family. A picture of her and her dad at last y
ear’s father/daughter golf tournament sat on her desk. She already missed how close she’d been with her dad before the divorce, before the fighting turned bad and he started looking at her like a problem instead of a solution. She’d had no choice about leaving, but her did still acted like she’d picked a side. When he’d called the other day she hadn’t known what to say. Part of her wanted to act normal, part of her wanted to hang up and part of her wanted to beg him to take her back home. Across the desk sat a picture of her and her two best friends Kate and Lily shopping in San Francisco. Their mom’s used to take them all there for a weekend and they’d shop until they dropped. Her friendship with Kate and Lily was easy. She missed that; she missed having people who understood her.
Looking around Whitney saw only pieces of her past life, of who she used to be. She didn’t feel like that girl anymore. Not really. Yet, she had no idea who she felt like instead. She felt like no one and the emptiness that brought echoed in her soul. It seemed like everyone in this town knew each other and everything about each other and she knew nothing. Nothing worth knowing in Millersburg anyways.
She laid there forever thinking about how much had changed in such a short amount of time and trying to figure out how she would ever fit into this life or how she’d survive if she never did fit in. The realization that the second scenario may be the one she should consider more seriously sent tears streaming down her cheeks. She let them fall silently, unable to grasp any comforting thought that might make them stop. Finally, as the moon drifted higher into the sky and her window let in the cooling breeze of night, Whitney gave into the exhaustion and slept.
Chapter 4
Over the next few weeks Whitney did find a way to survive. She placed Leif completely into the “cute but never going to happen” file, even though Brynley routinely made comments about the crush she was sure she’d uncovered. Ivy still seemed distant and didn’t come over to Whitney’s house either of the other two times she had Everley and Brynley over, but she was still nice to Whitney at school. Whitney wasn’t sure what to do about it, so for now she just ignored it. She’d hung out with Brynley the most. Since Ivy did cross country and Everley played volleyball, Brynley and Whitney were the two with the most time on their hands. They’d ride the bus to Whitney’s together and spend the afternoons playing basketball on the half-court Whitney had in her driveway or Brynley’s mom would pick them up and they do homework at Brynley’s. They also went to nearly every home volleyball game together to cheer on Everley. For the most part, people at school had stopped staring in the halls and Whitney kind of felt like she fit in, kind of.
Math quickly became Whitney’s favorite class. With Leif securely in the “not possible” file, Whitney allowed herself to enjoy his company with minimal pining. Phillip brought nothing but average, jackass high school boy comments to the group, but Everley and Leif offset him.
Late in September math kicked off with Ms. White handing back their first tests. Everley did the best scoring an 89%. Whitney earned a satisfactory 77% and the boys brought down the pod average severely with a 54% and 59%.
“Mrs. White?” Phillip said after receiving his test, “You must have done some math wrong when you scored my test, because there’s no way I scored this low.”
“Phillip, you must of done A LOT of math wrong because you did score that low,” Mrs. White replied without skipping a beat.
Leif let his head fall to his desk. “My mom is literally going to kill me,” Leif mumbled against the wood.
“I thought I knew this stuff better. A 77 is not good. I cannot get a C in here,” Whitney said.
“We need to do a study group before our next test!” Everley said.
“YES! We really should,” Whitney said. “We could even do it like weekly starting now to just review stuff so we are ready.”
“I am always on board when cute girls offer to do my homework for me,” Phillip said.
“We aren’t going to do your work for you. We will help you though,” Whitney said. Everley just glared at him.
“Where and when?” Leif asked.
After lots of thought, schedule comparison and debate they agreed on Leif’s house every Wednesday night from 7-8:30. Excitement overwhelmed Whitney as she thought about studying with Leif every Wednesday night. Only once did she let her mind wander to her staying after and ending up in his room with him. Just as quickly though, she remembered how out of her league he was and returned to earth.
The next day in drama, Whitney was busy trying to eavesdrop on Jasmine and Eva when Everley flew in breaking her focus.
“Did Ivy text you last night?”
“No, was she supposed to?”
“No, she just text me about our math group not being able to meet at her house so I thought maybe she’d told you too,” Everley said.
Whitney’s heart dropped in her chest. “What? Why?”
“I don’t know. Her dad got mad about it for some reason,” Everley said. “I guess, like her mom said it was okay, but then her dad asked who all would be coming and then he said no.”
“Doesn’t he know everyone?” Whitney said. “Well besides me.”
“I think it’s just cause there’d be a lot of us,” Everley said. “I don’t think it has to do with you. Their dad never wants a bunch of extra kids over there.”
Everley tried hard to recover but Whitney saw through it. She’d brushed off Ivy not coming over, but now she wasn’t allowed at their house for a math study group? She’d never even met these people. How could they dislike her without knowing her?
In math Leif just stated his house was a no-go. When Phillip tried to push him on it he grew pissed and refused to give up any reason beyond the numbers thing. Whitney was prepared to just drop it. The outside of school time with Leif now left a bitter taste in her mouth. Yet, Everley was not so easily conquered.
“Whitney can we do it at your house?” she asked a few minutes into their work time. Whitney stared at her in horror. If she wasn’t allowed at Leif’s house and Ivy wasn’t allowed at hers why did Everley think Leif could come? And if Leif didn’t come Whitney didn’t want Phillip there.
“Yeah! That’d be great. Your house is big and doesn’t even have a lot of people in it,” Phillip said.
“Um….I can ask,” Whitney said.
She brainstormed good excuses for the rest of the day without luck. At dinner her mom enthusiastically said yes, as Whitney knew she would. By the next morning Whitney had conceded to just saying yes, hoping Leif wouldn’t be allowed to come and thus Phillip would chose not to. She hung onto that string all the way until 7 pm the next evening, when Leif and Phillip rang her doorbell.
Their first session went much better than Whitney anticipated. Leif didn’t act weird at all instead making jokes and driving Whitney crazy in a good way all night long. By the end of the night Whitney was wondering if she’d imagined the whole thing. Maybe the drama didn’t have anything to do with her.
The boys left at 8:30 and the girls waited in the front room for Everley’s mom to pick her up.
“That was actually fun,” Whitney said.
“Did you think it wouldn’t be?” Everley asked.
“I don’t know. Ivy never comes over here and it seems like they don’t want me at their house so I didn’t know how things would go with Leif.”
“Leif’s different than his family,” Everley said.
Her mom’s car rounded the driveway as she said it and she rushed out leaving the comment on the air. Everley thought about it all night. She didn’t even know his family well enough to know what he was different from. Plus, Everley’s comment didn’t in any way deny what Whitney said about Ivy and the Smyth’s, leaving her more confused than ever.
◆◆◆
On their third week of session Phillip bailed at the last minute and Everley called at 7:05 to announce she’d forgotten about her little sister’s dance program that night.
“I guess it’s just us,” Whitney said ending the call wit
h Everley.
“No Everley either?”
“Nope, apparently her sister has a dance thing,” Whitney said. She spun her phone around on the wooden table. “You can go home if you want,” she offered Leif. She knew he’d want to.
“Nah, it’s cool. I need to study and you’re the real brains of the group anyways.” He flashed his single-dimple smile making Whitney even more nervous than she had been.
“Okay.” She opened her math book and pulled out her notes. “Chapter 10 it is.”
Leif moved to the seat next to Whitney ceasing her ability to make coherent sentences for the next few minutes. Suddenly she realized how weird this was. With Phillip and Everley there Whitney felt fine, but now, with just Leif, it seemed odd. Her stomach twisted in knots she fought to ignore.
“34? Did you get an answer to 34?” Leif asked.
“Um, yeah.” Whitney searched her paper for the answer. “68 inches squared.”
Most of the night continued in similar uneasy, short, math-centered questions making Whitney actually glad when they wrapped up their review and put away their books. She figured Leif would just leave, but he surprised her again.
“Did you always live in California?” Leif said.
“Yeah. I was born there,” Whitney said. “And no, I don’t surf or know any celebrities.”
Leif chuckled and Whitney felt her heart melt into her stomach. “I’m assuming you get those questions a lot.”
“From pretty much everyone I’ve met in this town.”
“Yeah, this town’s full of idiots. Even without the surfing and celebrities though, did you like it there?” Leif asked.
Being Whitney (Book one of the Being Series): A Young Adult Novel Page 3
