by Leigh Riker
Becca dropped onto a chair. “I told you how my dad reacted. With Calvin gone, I’m in a worse spot. It’s just me and...” Her gaze softening, Becca laid a protective hand over her stomach.
Elizabeth tried to choose her words carefully. “You wouldn’t want to marry Calvin anyway, Becca, if he’s not on board about this baby.”
Again, Elizabeth could have been talking about herself. If only she and Dallas didn’t live in such different worlds—if he wanted a deeper relationship right here in Barren, if a family other than his parents was on his mind...would she take that second chance? Or had Harry destroyed not only her trust but her faith in marriage?
“You mean a shotgun wedding?” Becca said, massaging her abdomen. “No, but I can’t have the baby then keep living with my dad the way we are now, like strangers, either. He’s so disappointed in me. That wouldn’t be fair to an innocent child.”
Becca sounded surprisingly mature. Weird that they were in the same situation. Becca faced a private scandal at home, while Elizabeth’s own unplanned pregnancy would give those in town who considered her to be Ms. Perfect a field day. Also, there was her mother to reckon with. She didn’t want to think about that. This conversation was for Becca, who, for once, seemed to be more in control than Elizabeth. Keeping her pregnancy a secret made them seem less than equals, which was unfair, as it was with Dallas. “Becca, if I tell you something, can you keep it to yourself?”
Becca’s gaze sharpened. “Sure.”
Elizabeth took a breath. “I feel that while Olivia’s been gone, you and I have gotten closer. I do hope we’re friends by now. So, I thought you should know. You’re not alone in this, sweetie. I’m—uh—I’m pregnant too.”
“Oh, that’s lovely. Congratulations, Elizabeth. But why don’t you want anyone to know?” Then Becca seemed to remember Elizabeth’s divorce and thus that Harry might not be the responsible party. “Oh,” she said again. “I hope your baby’s father is happier about that than Calvin was.”
Elizabeth had to overlook Becca’s statement. “Remember when I told you about my miscarriage last year? Sometimes I still walk around the house at night, grieving.” She saw Becca’s eyes well with tears. “You know how I make myself feel better then? Ice cream,” she said, hoping to make the girl smile. “Most recently, butter pecan. But I don’t mean to make light of things. When I found out I was pregnant again, I knew what a blessing this is. My baby will be a welcome addition to the family I already have. It won’t be easy, but I never considered any other option.” Elizabeth held her gaze. “What do you see as yours, Becca?”
She shuddered. “I already love my baby too, but how could I take care of it when I can hardly take care of myself? That’s what Calvin said. This job...the money I make alone would never support a baby. I’d be the worst single mom on the planet.”
Becca faced a truly hard choice.
So did Elizabeth. Her work on the rodeo had already thrust her back into the spotlight she’d hoped to avoid. Dallas had been right, before her children came home, that any gossip wouldn’t hurt them, but once the news of the baby came out, she’d feel humiliated again, even more personally this time. The speculation then would be world-class, worthy of the best paparazzi. And her kids would suffer. She doubted Dallas would commit to stay, commit to her, as if that were a viable solution. He had responsibilities to his mother, his career. And, still in her first trimester, what if she did miscarry again? That fear was never far from her mind.
“Have you thought about adoption?” Elizabeth asked.
“No,” Becca murmured. “I mean, I have—I tried to think of everything—but I’d be giving up my baby. I’d never see him or her again, would I?”
“In an open adoption maybe you could, if that’s what you’d want to do, but it could be painful seeing the child all the time yet not being a true part of its life.”
“He—or she—would have a good home, though. I’d make sure of that.”
Becca seemed to be growing up before her eyes. Adoption would free her of responsibility for a helpless human being she couldn’t afford to raise on her own; the baby would live in a more secure, maybe even prosperous home. Which didn’t take away from the heartbreak Becca would likely feel.
The bell above the door chimed in the front room, interrupting Elizabeth’s thoughts, and a customer walked in.
“Back to work. We can talk later or whenever you want,” Elizabeth told Becca.
“Thank you.” With a flush on her cheeks, Becca disappeared into the storeroom to take inventory of the newest rugs from Kedar. And probably to ponder her difficult, life-changing decision.
When she’d taken that first pregnancy test, Elizabeth had made hers. With every cell of her being, she would protect her unborn child. For the moment, she busied herself and blocked any other thought by dusting the knickknacks out front.
If she told Dallas about the baby now, she’d needlessly complicate their temporary relationship. She had a little time left before she began to show.
Maybe she would tell him right before he left town for good.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
ELIZABETH WAS PULLING out of her driveway the next morning when she realized the same house lights had been on next door for the past several days, not that she was keeping track of Dallas. His mail wouldn’t pile up outdoors because all the homes on this street had brass slots in the front door. His truck was gone. Where was he? They had PR issues to discuss, if not personal ones.
Elizabeth backed out onto the street and headed through town toward the McMann ranch. She’d planned to see Clara today anyway.
“Scads of people want to enter our baked goods contest,” Clara announced, meeting her at the door, all smiles. “Some are interested in showing their melons and tomatoes too! I know there’ll be others.”
“You’re doing a fantastic job,” Elizabeth said, following Clara into the ranch office and taking a seat. Clara seemed to have found a new purpose in life even beyond her devotion to Hadley’s and Jenna’s twins. Elizabeth reached for a piece of chocolate from the box between them. “About the rodeo, I’m concerned. Do you know where Dallas is? I don’t think he’s here in Barren,” she said with a question in her voice.
“He’s not, dear. I’m afraid his mother’s in the hospital again. As soon as he got the call the other day on Hadley’s sat phone while they were in the field rounding up strays, he left for Denver to be with her.” Clara selected a chocolate truffle. “I should have let you know.”
Elizabeth tensed. “No, Dallas should have.” They were supposed to be partners in the event, but he hadn’t thought to tell her he’d be out of town. Or that his mother was ill. “I hope Mrs. Maguire is all right.” But she couldn’t keep from asking, “Will he be here for the rodeo?”
“We expect he will. Things are already beginning to heat up on this ranch.”
“I’ve been focused on publicity this week.” Elizabeth frowned a little. “The Barren Journal’s editor finally caved. She’ll interview Dallas for a weekend edition. If he’s available,” she added. “If not, I’ll have to fill in, but they’re really interested in him and, of course, the celebrity factor. I don’t know what we’ll do regarding the TV segment I booked in Farrier. No one will want to see me when they’re expecting a rodeo star.”
“If necessary, perhaps Hadley could do the interviews.” Clara’s lips pursed. “Not that I should burden him with another obligation. His mood hasn’t been the best, and even Jenna won’t bring up an issue if it can wait.”
Elizabeth hoped that Dallas would come back in time. She thought of Becca, who was beside herself about Calvin, which made them kindred spirits. She tried to sound upbeat. “We’ll manage, Clara,” she said.
“Everyone seems excited, and Barren is alive with energy.”
Elizabeth couldn’t complain. The gossip she’d expected hadn’t materialized so far, and even Ber
nice was keeping quiet, although, certainly with her sharp gaze she’d noticed Dallas’s absence.
Clara chose another square of chocolate. “With the rodeo goings-on, the ranch could use help. I wouldn’t have taken Calvin for a quitter. Hadley’s been good to him, and Calvin was due his pay, which he didn’t take. I’m sure he needed that. What on earth made him pack his things then leave without a word? Without Dallas here too, poor Hadley’s doing all the work himself.”
Elizabeth guessed why Calvin had left but, for Becca’s sake, she couldn’t say anything. They were in the same boat now, and she wished she’d told Dallas about the baby after all. Even when he must already have enough on his mind too.
* * *
DALLAS HATED HOSPITALS. He’d spent time in several of them, most recently because of his hip injury, and it didn’t matter how well the staff did their jobs, how skilled the doctors, how kind the nurses were. He always wanted to be somewhere else. Especially now.
“Hey, Mom.” Dallas leaned over her bed. “It’s me again. How you feeling today?”
She framed his face. “Oh, honey. Your father should never have bothered you.”
“Don’t kid a kidder. Of course I came.” Had she forgotten he’d also been here for the past three days? The night before that he’d driven rather than flown to Denver, not only to save money but because he might have to stay longer this time and would need his truck. Perched on the edge of her bed, he took her hand. Hers felt cool, as if the blood had left her body, and his throat closed. “You tell me one more time you’re fine when I can see you’re not, I’ll take all your toys away.”
At his teasing, she brightened. “Not my new vacuum cleaner.” She smiled wanly. “Your dad bought it for my birthday, every woman’s fondest wish for a gift, but I know what he really wanted—to give up his cleaning chore—and just between us, I’m all for that.” Her other hand covered her forehead. “You should see that man bang into every piece of furniture, the wood chips flying.” Then she seemed to run out of steam. Her grip weakened, small and fragile, and the lump in his throat grew bigger. “I don’t know how he’d manage without me.”
“You’re not going to do anything foolish, are you?” Like leave me and Dad? He’d left his father downstairs with sorrow in his eyes, the fear that Dallas also felt. He worried about him too. She was right. Their house—Dallas’s home—could use a good cleaning, and when he’d arrived, there hadn’t been a scrap of food in the refrigerator. His dad had been spending all his time in this hospital, sleeping on a chair next to her bed at night. A half hour ago, Dallas had taken him to the cafeteria for a good meal, so at least he’d eaten today. But what would happen if they lost Millie?
“Don’t be ridiculous, Dallas. I’m in here to rest a few days, that’s all.” She managed a grin. “My doctor looks about twelve years old, but then everyone does—including you. You’ll always be my boy. Tell me what you’ve been doing since we saw you last.”
Dallas had trouble talking around the ache in his throat. His parents were the best, a far cry from the two who had conceived him and Hadley. For a few minutes, he talked about his rodeo, his temporary alliance with Lizzie—he tried to make that sound like strictly business—and his hip, which had mostly healed. He was done at last with rehab.
Millie held his gaze. “When will you introduce me to your Lizzie?”
Dallas froze. “She’s not mine.” Had his mom seen the glint in his eye whenever he said Lizzie’s name? Heard his husky tone of voice? “I knew I was your son from a different mother—” true enough “—but I never guessed you were a mind reader.”
“Then you don’t deny it. That’s not all business. I could tell.”
“No, ma’am.” He brushed hair back from her forehead. “But don’t start naming your grandchildren or, to get things in the order that would please you, planning my wedding.” He explained about Lizzie’s ex-husband, the scandal she’d endured and her three children. “She has to put her life together again, Mom.” And leaving rodeo was probably the only way he might convince Lizzie that he was more than friend material, but he wasn’t about to do that. “If I don’t return to the circuit, which would mean never being in Barren for her, Ace will sign a new rider.”
“Then you’d find another agent.” Her steady gaze made him squirm. “You’d really let Ace O’Leary make your decisions?”
“I’d be out of business, Mom, lose the rest of my endorsements.”
Dallas remembered his most recent talk with Ace, the same day he’d heard Millie was in the hospital. Your contract’s about to expire with Prestige Boots, and they’ve decided—in part because you’re off the circuit—not to renew.
Dallas said, “The boot people already canned me.”
“There are others.” She wagged a finger at him. “If you quit before you win that championship, your father and I will disown you.”
Dallas grinned. “No, you won’t. I’m not getting rid of you either.”
She answered his smile. “I was joking. I know you won’t stop. You’d never forgive yourself, but about your—Lizzie?”
He stopped smiling. “What does she need with a guy like me? I’m practically a nomad.”
“A nomad?” His mother wouldn’t let him off the hook. “That’s part of your job and won’t last forever. Make use of the time you have. Before I’m through, I want to see you settled with a woman who loves you and a family of your own.”
“I’m not ready to get serious.”
“I think you already are.”
Dallas didn’t welcome the notion that zipped, unfiltered, through his head. Most of his rodeo friends had wives or serious girlfriends. In Barren, during this summer of recovery, he’d learned Cooper and Nell Ransom were starting their family, and they weren’t the only ones. No, Dallas wasn’t ready, yet the idea held an appeal it never had before.
As his mom had said, time was passing. The day he’d left the McMann ranch, earlier he’d surprised Jenna and Hadley having a quarrel. Later in the field, looking miserable, Hadley had told Dallas why. “It’s not bad enough she can’t have babies, but I didn’t realize she was this unhappy.” Then Dallas had gotten the call about Millie. He’d hit the road within the hour.
Dallas wasn’t bound to anyone. Or was he wasting the best years of his own life? Refusing, in part, to grow up? He hadn’t seen Lizzie since right after her doctor’s appointment, when Dallas had guessed she was still keeping something from him. He’d stayed long enough that day to watch the rodeo tape with Jordan, and during the video Seth had crawled onto Dallas’s lap and fallen asleep in his arms. Soon after, Dallas had gone back to his house. On his way across the drive he’d seen Stella watching from a window as if to make sure he was headed in the opposite direction. Would have made him smile—fierce little tigress—but he’d been too worried that Lizzie was far more ill than she’d admitted.
What did all that mean? Sure, he’d like something more than friendship with her, but he also knew they weren’t free to go further than that. Dallas’s heart ached. Or was his mom right? And he’d waded into deeper waters here? Could he be falling in love with Lizzie?
He forced his attention back to Millie. Her tired gaze had brightened. “Three children, you said?”
“Mom, cut it out.”
“Tell me their names.”
With a sigh, Dallas did just that, throwing in a couple of cute stories about his babysitting stint with Lizzie’s kids, then stood up, patting Millie’s hand as it lay on the covers. “I’d like to grant your fondest wish but not yet, and never mind me. You concentrate on getting well.” He kissed her cheek, still afraid for her, and knowing he’d likely disappoint her about Lizzie. His job, his parents, had to come first. “I’ll take care of Dad for you.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
AT THE RANCH two days ago Elizabeth had told Clara the shop was out of flyers, and today Jenna had brought a fresh supply.
Unfortunately, she interrupted one of Elizabeth’s ongoing discussions with Becca about Calvin and their baby. “He won’t ever come back,” Becca was insisting, “and I don’t want to give up my baby but...”
Seeing Jenna, she trailed off. Becca’s lips flattened and she smoothed the tunic she wore to cover her stomach.
Jenna’s eyebrows rose. “Should I go out and come in again?”
“No, you’re fine.” Elizabeth took the flyers, then fanned them across a bare space on the front counter. Even she could feel the growing sense of excitement in town, as Clara had said. The rodeo was getting ever closer, yet Dallas was still missing. She hoped his mom was doing better but... “Things must be hopping out at Clara’s. I hope the disruption’s not overwhelming.”
Jenna’s eyes were shadowed. “Hadley says the barn was mostly empty anyway. Now it will be full of stock and so will the paddocks, the pastures, plus the tack room will be stuffed with equipment.”
Elizabeth couldn’t stop from asking. “Has Dallas told Hadley when he’ll be back?” Maybe he was avoiding her too, slipping in and out of his house without her seeing him. The pattern of his lights hadn’t changed, though, so probably not. And she had to admit she missed him.
Jenna said, “His mom’s better but he’s staying there as long as he can.”
Elizabeth tried to downplay her concerns. “His prep work for the rodeo was mostly done—except for some interviews I don’t know whether to cancel or find a substitute for—so that leaves Clara and me to finish the rest.” She just hoped he’d be here on rodeo day. Elizabeth had decided it was time to tell her kids about that, and now her two boys couldn’t wait, but she still hesitated to let Jordan compete. And Stella had asked to enter the baking competition with the cookies she’d learned to make at a Brownie troop meeting. Elizabeth was happy to see her involved in what would be a family outing.
