by J. R. Adler
Nicole rubbed her granddaughter’s sleeping back, swooning over her. She hadn’t seen her since she was a baby.
“She’s gotten big,” Nicole said, her voice just above a whisper with a waning sadness held within. Her eyes widened, revealing more of the red veins that appeared to have no end, like the roots of an ancient tree.
Kimberley nodded, her eyes still searching her mother’s face, absorbing it in its entirety as well as each section of it.
“Let’s get her inside and in bed,” her mother said, beckoning Kimberley with her hand.
Kimberley ran her fingers through Jessica’s hair as she slept peacefully in an old wooden crib she was sure was either passed down from David’s family or had been picked up from a local garage sale. The bedroom her and her daughter would be sharing for the foreseeable future was small, but it would do. It was big enough for a full-size bed, a bedside table, a crib, and a tall dresser. That was all she needed. Well, all she really needed was Jessica, so anything beyond that was a luxury. She tucked the small stuffed elephant beneath her daughter’s arm. It was dingy, old, and gray with a missing eye, but Jessica loved it more than anything. Kimberley pulled the pink blanket up a little higher and leaned down, planting at least the twelfth kiss on her daughter’s forehead for the night.
She took a look around the room, at the two suitcases beside the closet, the bag on the floral bedspread, and then decided she’d unpack it all in the morning. This was hers and Jessica’s home now, a nine-by-ten bedroom with popcorn walls and vomit-green shag carpeting. It definitely must have been last updated in the 1970s, when dangerous, textured walls met comfy, ugly floors—a time when people clearly didn’t know what they wanted, and it was evident in their choice of interior design. Kimberley walked to the door and reached for the light switch, her hand hovering near it for a moment, one final glance at Jessica. As she turned off the light, the back of her forearm slid down the wall.
“Ouch,” she said as her brain registered the searing pain. She brought her arm up to her line of sight, a thick, red scratch stretched three inches long. The popcorn walls had already gotten her; the house drawing the first drop of blood. Kimberley rubbed the blood away and reminded herself to keep Jessica away from the walls, if that were even possible. She rubbed her arm again, trying to polish away the stinging pain.
“She fell right asleep,” Kimberley said to her mother as she gently closed the door to the bedroom.
“Oh, that’s good.” Nicole smiled. “She had a long day.”
“Yeah, and she slept for a lot of it. Made it through the trip with only one tantrum.”
“You’re a lucky mom. When you were little, the only way I could get you to sleep was with a nip of rum.”
“Mother of the century.” Kimberley rolled her eyes, but her tone was light, and she smiled. It was so good to see her mom.
“Oh, I’m mostly kidding, honey.” Nicole gave her daughter’s hand a squeeze. “Come, dinner’s ready.”
Kimberley followed Nicole down the hallway and into the small dining room that fit a square table, four chairs and a buffet filled with white china. The plates on the table were plastic, so she assumed the china was for special guests, of which she clearly was not. David padded into the dining room and took a seat at the table.
“Everything looks great,” he said, planting a kiss on Nicole’s cheek.
Her mother smiled at David and turned her attention to Kimberley. “Sit. Eat,” Nicole said while she took her own seat.
The plates were already pre-served with a scoop of buttery Brussels sprouts, a large cut of flank steak, and an even larger helping of mashed potatoes. A glass of red wine was placed at her and her mom’s plates, with an open bottle in the center of the table. Kimberley took a seat across from her mom and next to David.
“No wine for you, David?” Kimberley asked, mostly out of curiosity.
“Wine’s for women,” David said, pulling a beer from his overalls and opening it before setting it on the table.
Kimberley nodded. No use arguing that line of thinking. She picked up her fork and dove it into the Brussels sprouts.
David cleared his throat. “We say grace in this house, Kimberley.” He held her mother’s frail hand in his and bowed his head. Kimberley went to reach for his hand out of politeness, but it wasn’t in sight and his eyes were already closed. She sensed he had done it on purpose, perhaps displeased that she had eaten a bite of food before giving thanks. Her mother’s hand found hers and she held it.
David cleared his throat. “Dear Lord, we thank you for this food and all our blessings. We ask nothing of you as you have already given us so much. Amen.”
“Amen,” Kimberley and Nicole repeated.
Nicole let go of Kimberley’s hand and shot her a sympathetic glance.
David let go of Nicole’s hand and brought his other hand up from beneath the table. Without missing a beat, he cut into his rare steak; blood oozed out of it, pooling in the center of his plate. He immediately popped the hunk of meat directly into his mouth. Kimberley watched him for a moment from the corner of her eye. She wasn’t the godly type, but his prayer said more about him than anything else he had said this evening. He was a proud man, straight to the point, direct, and he didn’t ask for things; he took them himself.
“Don’t say grace in your house, Kimberley?” David asked with food still in his mouth.
“I’m usually too hungry for that,” she said with a laugh.
David stared back, methodically chewing his food. Kimberley couldn’t tell if he was thinking of a response or trying to burn a hole through her head by staring at her and culling some divine power from up high. Thankfully, Kimberley’s mother intervened first.
“I’m so happy you and Jessica are here.” Nicole beamed as she picked up her fork.
“Me too, Mom.” Kimberley dove her fork into the Brussels sprouts she had her eyes on. All day long, she had only eaten peanuts from the plane and an old Larabar she found lying in the bottom of Jessica’s diaper bag. Her stomach rumbled as the forkful of food entered her mouth. A homecooked meal. She almost moaned over it. In New York, takeout food and protein bars were the norm, but this, this she could get used to.
“So, David told me Wyatt and Emily live in the house.”
David let out a small grunt as if he thought Kimberley was poking the bear.
“They do. You’re just going to love them and their two boys. They’re a handful,” Nicole said, taking a sip of red wine.
“Boys are meant to be handfuls. That’s why they’re boys,” David said as he brought the beer up to his mouth. He took a long swig and set it back on the table with a thud. His eyes never leaving his plate.
Nicole gave a tight smile as she cut her steak up into tiny pieces.
Kimberley made a “hmph” sound. She figured David was the type of man that would explain away all actions of the male sex with “boys will be boys,” so his comment didn’t come as a surprise to her. David seemed like a simple man with outdated views. She decided she’d lighten up on him, try to be a little nicer, but she’d still keep a close eye. You could never be too careful, especially with men. Kimberley had learned that the hard way.
“You’ll meet them tomorrow,” Nicole added. “They were supposed to come over tonight, but their youngest, Jack, was running a fever, so she put him to bed early.”
“Is he okay?” David asked, his voice full of concern.
“I’m sure he is. Kids get fevers all the time. But Emily didn’t want to risk passing anything onto Jessica, just in case it’s more serious. Hopefully, he’ll sleep it off,” Nicole explained.
“He’s a tough kid. He’s got them Turner genes.” David popped another piece of steak in his mouth, chewing proudly.
Nicole smiled and took a sip of her wine. “So, when do you start work?”
“The day after tomorrow.” Kimberley took a bite of mashed potatoes.
“Sheriff Sam Walker is highly respected in this community. I’m sur
e you’ll learn a lot from him,” David said with a crooked smile.
Kimberley tilted her head. “I’m sure I can teach him a thing or two as well.”
Nicole interjected. “Well, Dead Woman Crossing is nothing like New York City, I’m sure. It’s rather quiet here.”
“You working the first shift?”
“Yes, unless I’m needed otherwise.”
David nodded. “Day shift is good. They’ve got a pretty solid team. Nothing all that exciting though. You might get bored.” David picked up his steak with his hands and bit into it like a caveman. He chewed and swallowed, grease and blood from the piece of meat covered his lips and around his mouth. “Might want to move back to the Big Apple after a few months of gangbangerless streets.”
“I’m sure I’ll be just fine here. I’m looking forward to some peace and quiet. More time with Jessica and my mother, less time with gangbangers,” Kimberley said with a small smile directed at her mother.
Nicole smiled back.
“That’s good, then. Sounds like the Custer County Sheriff’s Office is going to be a good fit for you.” David took a long swig of his beer.
Kimberley looked away from her mother’s plate and back at David. “I hope so. I’ll miss the excitement of the NYPD, but this is what’s best for Jessica.”
“If you ever get too bored and want a thrill, I’ll take ya hunting. Ever been?” David raised an eyebrow.
“For animals? No. Humans? Yes.” Kimberley chuckled, but stopped when she saw the confused look on David and Nicole’s faces. “Sorry, homicide humor.”
Nicole took another sip of her wine. David’s mouth curved into a grin when he finally got the joke. “Ha,” he said. “That’s a good one.”
“What do you hunt around here?” Kimberley asked.
“Depends on the season. But deer, bobcats, hogs, turkey, and rabbits are the main ones.”
“I might have to take you up on that hunting offer. I’ll have to see how thrilling the job is first.”
David took another swig of his beer and nodded.
“What’s on your agenda for tomorrow?” Nicole asked, changing the subject as she was clearly bored with the hunting conversation. She placed her fork beside her plate.
“Aside from unpacking and meeting Wyatt and Emily, I’ve got to run to the daycare to meet the staff there.” Kimberley cut into her fleshy steak.
“Of course. I’ll go with you since I’ll be doing some of the pick-ups and drop-offs. You know you don’t have to pay for daycare? I’m home all day; I could watch Jessica. Actually, I would love to,” Nicole said, the vivacity in her eyes growing.
“Well, Mom, you could have always hopped on a plane?” Just as the words left her mouth, she immediately regretted it.
Nicole pursed her lips together. The light in her eyes dimming slightly.
Kimberley tried to smooth things over. “Actually, no, I don’t want to impose. It’s good for Jessica to interact with other kids and socialize. Plus, she’s a handful,” she quickly added.
“She didn’t seem like one tonight…” Nicole took a sip of wine.
“That was only because I woke her up early this morning and played with her all day until we had to leave for the airport.” Kimberley chewed on a piece of steak.
There was no way she was going to burden her mother with Jessica, especially after witnessing her not eat anything at dinner or seeing how frail and tired she was.
“Oh, alright.” Nicole flicked her hand. “But if you change your mind.”
“She said no, Nicole. Plus, you have a house to take care of,” David argued.
Nicole gave a slight nod.
“I can help around the house,” Kimberley said, jutting her chin up at David.
Who was he to tell her mother what she could and could not do?
“That is expected, but I appreciate you offering,” David said, setting down his now empty bottle of beer. “Well, I’ve gotta get up early, so I’m going to head to bed. Good night, you two.”
He rose from his chair, leaving his empty plate and beer bottle on the table, and walked down the hallway toward their bedroom.
“Good night,” Nicole and Kimberley called out.
His footsteps were heavy and loud throughout the small house.
“Is he alright?” Kimberley asked.
Nicole nodded. “He just doesn’t like change. Don’t worry. He’ll get used to it.”
Kimberley searched her mother’s face again, but it remained neutral.
“Do you need help cleaning up?” she offered.
“No, of course not. You’ve had a long day. Please go to bed,” her mother said, standing from her chair and picking up her full plate of food and David’s empty plate. She stacked them on top of each other.
Kimberley slowly rose from her seat.
“Are you sure?”
Nicole hesitated for a moment. “How about you help me finish off another bottle of wine instead?” she said with a smile.
Her mother prided herself on taking care of her family in every way she could, which to her was cleaning and cooking. Growing up, it seemed to be the one thing Nicole could do that wouldn’t infuriate Kimberley’s father, so she put all of her energy into having a spotless home and preparing the best meals she could, despite only being able to afford the cheapest of ingredients. Her father worked in a factory and her mother was a secretary and, with only one child, they should have been financially stable at worst. However, her father’s drinking consumed a large portion of their income, dropping them from middle class to just scraping by.
“Deal,” Kimberley said, smiling back.
“I figured that was an offer you couldn’t resist,” Nicole said over her shoulder as she left the dining room carrying the plates, silverware, and empty bottles. She returned only a moment later with a bottle of red wine and a corkscrew.
“You know I can help with more than just drinking the wine?” Kimberley teased.
“I know. That’s why I brought the corkscrew. Open and pour. I’ll just be a moment,” Nicole said with a laugh, disappearing back into the kitchen again.
Kimberley shook her head and smiled. She missed moments like this. Her and her mom hadn’t had nearly enough of them. From the kitchen, she heard water splashing and pans banging, while she uncorked the bottle. Nicole was clearly rushing to get back to her daughter. Just as she finished pouring the two glasses of wine, her mother emerged into the dining room, slightly out of breath. A couple of beads of sweat clung to her hairline.
“See, I told you it would only be a moment,” Nicole said, taking a seat.
Her mother raised her glass. “To having my babies home.” She smiled, but a glossiness formed in her eyes.
“To being home,” Kimberley added. They clinked their glasses together and drank.
“I was really sad to hear about Aaron.” Nicole set her glass down. “When I met him, it seemed like you two made a good team.”
It had been a couple of days before Kimberley’s due date when Nicole had met Aaron in person.
“Wow, I can see where Kimberley gets her good looks from,” Aaron had said, smothering her mother with charm. He had won Kimberley over the same way. Her mother blushed and hugged Aaron, officially welcoming him into the family despite the fact that he and Kimberley weren’t engaged and he had only recently decided to step up as a father.
Her mother had stayed with her for ten days, helping with last-minute preparations for Jessica, being there for the birth, and then helping care for a newborn baby. During that time, Aaron had been on his best behavior, attentive in every sense of the word. Feeding and changing Jessica, waking up with her, rocking her until she stopped crying. He even gave nightly foot rubs to Kimberley and prepared her and Nicole nutritious and hearty dinners. So, did Kimberley and Aaron make a good team? It sure seemed that way.
“Looks can be deceiving.” Kimberley shrugged away the memory, taking another sip of her wine, careful to swallow it completely. Aaron was like a g
ag reflex. Just thinking about him made her want to throw up.
“What do you mean, sweetie?” Nicole’s eyebrows drew together with concern.
Kimberley looked around the dining room, then back at her mother. She’d never uttered the words aloud, never told anyone how awful or selfish Aaron really was.
“Aaron walked out on Jessica and me well before she was born.” Kimberley still couldn’t say it. Her words faltered. She was embarrassed she had picked a partner that had been so selfish, so like her own father—minus the addiction. It was true, the apple didn’t fall far from the tree, and it was why she had never told her mother.
Nicole tilted her head in confusion.
“He pushed me for an abortion when I told him I was pregnant. He pushed for it all the way up until I was twenty-four weeks.”
Nicole gasped. Reaching her hand out for her daughter’s, she held it. “I wish you would have told me this before.”
“I know. I didn’t want to tell anyone, because I don’t want Jessica ever finding out that her father wanted to abort her.”
“What changed? Why was he there for the birth?” Nicole creased her brow.
“I’m not sure. Trying to clear his conscience or something. He was gone two weeks later, claiming it was too much for him to handle, and he never wanted her anyway. But he still manages to send a text here and there to ask how she is, as if he cares.” Kimberley shrugged her shoulders and took a long sip of her wine.
