by K. L. Slater
Tom had a heart murmur that was getting rapidly worse. He needed an operation, and it was a bigger one than if they’d acted sooner. I wished I’d been more insistent earlier in the process. He recovered well, but the surgeon told us that, left untreated, the condition might easily have killed him. Like one of those healthy sixteen-year-old boys we’ve all read about who collapses out of the blue on the football pitch.
I’d known there was something wrong all along. When everyone had tried to shut me up, I knew it. Like Dad had once said, it was all about keeping tight control on what you cared about.
I’d internalised that rule. Lived by it. Now, I was beginning to realise how it had utterly exhausted me over the years.
I knew there were things happening around my son and I was determined to find out what. No matter how many times they all told me I was imagining it.
* * *
The café was only about a ten-minute walk from Second Chances, across the other side of town. It was a cold but dry afternoon, so when I’d finished my coffee, I decided to leave the car where it was and walk over there. I’d call in and surprise Audrey, find out what she thought about the cryptic things Coral had said.
It was actually a bit cooler than I’d thought, so I buttoned up my jacket and set off. The sky was grey and the breeze was persistent, but after a few minutes walking briskly, I warmed up a bit.
I took a short cut through the quieter side roads until I reached the bustle of the main shops again. I wondered how Tom would get on in his new job at Bridget’s charity. It sounded so much fancier than the humble archiving clerk position I’d lined up for him. I wished I felt more pleased for him, but judging by the article Audrey had shown me, Bridget was making full use of Tom’s link to Jesse’s death to highlight the work of the charity. My son being pushed into the media spotlight for all the wrong reasons.
As I neared the shop, I felt a little nervous, hoping Audrey would be pleased to see me. All friendships had sticky patches. Maybe I’d been more absorbed in my own life than I’d realised. I thought she had things going on in her life she hadn’t wanted to burden me with.
The shop looked empty from the street, but when I opened the door, prompting the old-fashioned bell to chime out, Audrey and the single customer who stood with her at the desk both turned round.
‘Jill!’ Audrey’s eyes widened and she quickly stepped away from the other person. ‘This is unexpected!’
She was babbling, but I was already too distracted to take any notice of her.
The customer stepped forward.
‘Jill,’ Bridget said. ‘What a nice surprise. You look … different. Your hair!’
To my knowledge, Bridget had never been in the shop before. I kept my voice level. ‘Am I interrupting something important?’
‘No! Of course not.’ Audrey sprang into her smooth managerial patter. ‘Bridget popped in to say hello and to—’
‘I wanted a look around the shop,’ Bridget added laconically. ‘I’ve always wondered what it was like in here.’
‘Really?’ I took a few steps forward. ‘Audrey, you were showing her, I presume?’
Audrey picked up some wire hangers and put them down again. She didn’t know where to look or what to do with herself.
Bridget sighed. ‘Look, to tell you the truth, I came in to ask Audrey if you were OK. Last week’s dinner party wasn’t the success I’d hoped it would be, and … I thought Audrey might know how you were feeling.’
I folded my arms and stared at her. She must think I’d fallen off a Christmas tree.
‘Why didn’t you simply ask me how I was feeling, Bridget?’ I turned my attention to Audrey. Her usually calm demeanour had vanished. Her face looked hot, her eyes darting around the shop as if she was searching for an escape route. ‘I didn’t know you were in touch with Bridget, Audrey.’ My measured tone belied the relentless thumping on my chest wall. I was desperately trying to piece it all together, but I was drawing a complete blank.
‘I should go,’ Bridget said. ‘Thanks for showing me around the shop, Audrey.’
‘Hang on,’ I called as she walked quickly to the door. Something was wrong with this picture. It wasn’t only that my best friend was talking to my biggest enemy. There was something else more subtle out of place. I was the outsider. The one in the dark.
Another customer came in at that moment and Bridget took the opportunity to slip out.
With the new customer still browsing, I moved in on Audrey. ‘Don’t lie to me. I know something weird was happening there.’ I made a real effort to dampen down the emotion, but it still slipped through, showing itself in my shaking voice. ‘You’re my oldest friend and I’m asking you to level with me. Did she send you round to the house yesterday to taunt me with that article?’
‘Of course not!’
I wanted Audrey to tell me the truth, but I wanted that truth to be something innocent. Something that didn’t threaten our friendship or complicate my life even further. The things I’d told her about Bridget, about my deepest feelings … had she really been betraying me? Because that was what it looked like.
Audrey looked suddenly gaunt. ‘Can you watch the shop for me while I make us a drink?’
‘I don’t want a drink. I want you to tell me why Bridget Wilson was here and what you were talking about.’
Audrey glanced anxiously at the customer browsing the scarf rack. ‘When she’s gone, I’ll close up for half an hour and we’ll talk. I promise. I’ll make that drink. Your hair looks great, by the way. You look years younger.’ She disappeared into the back of the shop. I heard crockery rattling in the kitchen and I willed the customer to leave quickly.
Bridget had said she was asking Audrey if I was OK, which was ridiculous. To my knowledge, Audrey hadn’t spoken to Bridget since Tom went to prison. The two women knew each other, of course, and there had been family occasions where they’d met and exchanged pleasantries in the years before. But in the end, they had both been my friends, never friendly with each other. For years, all the meeting up and socialising Bridget and I did was based around the children, and Audrey didn’t have kids.
‘Hello?’ the customer called out. ‘I’d like the price of the long purple scarf, please.’
‘Sorry, I was miles away.’ I picked up the scarf and saw there was no little price sticker. The next one was the same. ‘These must have been put out before they were priced up. One moment, I’ll ask my manager.’
The customer nodded and moved on to the belts. I walked to the doorway that led through to the kitchen and back office.
‘Audrey, can you come through to the shop for a moment?’
There was no answer. I heard the hot water urn spluttering and hissing.
‘Audrey? A customer has a query about the scarves.’
Silence.
I glanced back into the shop. Our policy was to never leave it unattended when a customer was present. I walked down the short hallway, ensuring I still had sight of the woman. The kitchenette was empty. I pushed open the door to the office, expecting to see Audrey caught up on a phone call or looking at something on the computer, but that was empty too.
Which left only one place. The cloakroom.
‘Audrey? You in there?’ I rattled the handle, expecting it to be locked, but the door opened and Audrey wasn’t in there.
I dashed into the office again with new eyes. Her handbag and coat were nowhere to be seen. The fire door leading to the back yard was closed, and I wondered if she’d popped out with a rubbish bag to the bins we shared with the neighbouring shops and inadvertently locked herself out.
I pushed down the emergency bar and the heavy, solid door swung open. A cat jumped out of an over-full bin and scurried out of sight, but other than that, the area was empty.
Audrey was nowhere to be seen. It seemed like she’d simply vanished into thin air.
I closed the fire door and rushed back into the shop, ready to explain to the customer that I had to close up, but she’d o
bviously got tired of waiting for me and had already left.
In the back, I searched through each room again and there, on the kitchenette worktop, was a note in Audrey’s handwriting:
So sorry, Jill, feel unwell and had to leave. Will explain everything about Bridget very soon. Please close the shop for me. Will be in touch when I feel better.
What kind of explanation was that for doing a disappearing act without a word? It was outrageous – totally out of character for Audrey, who was a stickler for opening up and closing at the correct times.
I pulled my phone out of my bag and called her number. It was turned off and my call went straight to answerphone. I left a garbled message. ‘Audrey? Where are you? Why did you take off like that? Call me when you get this message.’
I followed it up with a text as an insurance policy, so that she’d see at least one of my messages when she turned the phone on:
What happened? I’m worried about you! Contact me asap or I’m coming over.
At the counter, I scribbled a hasty note on a sheet of printer paper with black marker pen: SORRY! SHOP TEMPORARILY CLOSED DUE TO UNFORESEEN CIRCUMSTANCES. I stuck it to the glass with Sellotape – one of Audrey’s pet hates – and then engaged the latch, bolted the door and pulled down the blinds.
I’d give her a couple of hours and then I’d go to the house. If she wasn’t there, I’d wait. In the meantime, there was somebody else that owed me answers.
Thirty-Five
Bridget
When I got back home from the charity shop, Tom was watching football in the living room.
I’d driven around a bit after leaving the shop and I felt calmer now.
I breezed in and kissed him on the cheek.
‘Is it too early for a gin?’ he called as I walked past. ‘I’ve been dying to tell you all about the gym. Where have you been?’
‘Here and there,’ I said vaguely. ‘I’ll jump in the shower and then we can have a drink. Can’t wait to hear all about it.’
Upstairs, as I soaped my skin and washed my hair, I tried to eradicate the altercation in the shop from my mind but it wasn’t working. Audrey Denton’s shocked expression was still in my head. I’d told her exactly what I’d seen, given her the date and time, and she was unable to deny it. She knew I was on to her now.
When Jill turned up at the shop like that it was my turn to be shocked. She’d had her hair styled and coloured and she was actually wearing make-up for once. It seemed to give her a new confidence. I’d beat a hasty retreat but now I’d have to think of how I was going to explain it all to Tom.
I stepped out of the shower, towel-dried my hair and wrapped a soft white bath sheet around me. Still damp, I padded through to the master bedroom, luxuriating in the soft cream carpet beneath my bare feet and the weak sunlight streaming in through the floor-to-ceiling window, drenching the room in a pale golden glow.
I gasped when I almost walked straight into Tom. He’d obviously crept up and waited for me. He looked like a cowboy, stripped to the waist. I spotted the small scar on his chest he’d told me was from a childhood op. Tousled hair, a five o’clock shadow and a slight smirk on his full lips. He looked … edible, and within a second, my entire body ached for him.
‘Hello. Is there something I can do for you?’ I said saucily, letting the towel drop to the floor. He didn’t say a word but pulled me towards him, his fingers tracing the back of my neck down to the damp, warm hollow at the bottom of my back. Everywhere they touched, they left a tingle of electricity. God, this man made me feel so alive.
Suddenly impatient to show him I was worth ten of those ditsy young women he’d no doubt seen at the gym today, I tugged at the waistband of his jeans and he took a few steps back as I shimmied forward. He lost his footing and stumbled backwards onto the bed, and we giggled as I launched myself on top of him, lost in the passion surging through me.
Then the doorbell rang. A long ring followed by a couple of staccato blasts.
Tom pulled his face back an inch, but I grabbed the back of his head.
‘Ignore it,’ I gasped, sealing my lips over his again. He smelled of nutmeg and soap.
He flipped me over so that he was on top, his muscular arms holding his weight off me, and I closed my eyes, feeling myself unwinding inside. A couple of seconds later, someone started to hammer on the front door.
‘What the hell?’ Tom froze above me.
A fist banging, then the doorbell, then the fist again …
‘Jeez!’ He rolled off the bed and went to the window. He looked out, cursing in disbelief.
‘What’s wrong?’ I sat up and reached for my damp towel from the floor. ‘Who is it?’
His strong, tight body seemed to deflate in front of me. ‘It’s my mother.’
‘Oh, perfect timing.’ I groaned but my mouth went dry. I hadn’t even mentioned my run-in with Jill to him yet.
‘I’ll have to go down,’ he said, starting to dither around looking for his T-shirt. ‘She’ll see the cars and know we’re in.’
‘Tell her we’re busy.’ I gave him a little grin, tried to relax. ‘Say she’ll need to come back another time because you have some very pressing business to attend to.’
He didn’t laugh. He made a sort of heavy puffing sound before muttering, ‘I don’t know about that. My mum can be very determined.’
‘Yeah? Well so can I.’ I was in no mood for Jill’s power games right now. Her stalking into the shop like she had authority over who stepped through the door. I knew she’d hate to think I’d been speaking to Audrey, because Audrey was her friend and I was in the shop she worked at. Her urge to control everything and everyone around her was frightening.
Still, thanks to her impromptu visit, I had to think on my feet. I wasn’t ready to tell Tom what I’d confronted Audrey with yet.
I slipped on some underwear and a loose white cotton shift dress and combed through my wet hair while Tom scuttled off to get the door. It infuriated me, the way he still jumped to attention when Jill clicked her fingers. No wonder she still thought she was in with a chance of telling him what to do with his life.
Tom might spend his life being nervous of her, but I’d be damned if I let Jill Billinghurst put me on the back foot. It was the perfect chance to put her in a bad light. What did Jill know about my chat with Audrey, really? Nothing! I would front this out, and hopefully, if I did a good enough job, Jill would come out of it looking much worse in Tom’s eyes.
I walked across the expanse of biscuit-coloured carpet and descended the stairs, standing barefoot where I’d be able to listen to what was happening but I wouldn’t be seen.
Tom had already opened the front door, and I heard a muted conversation taking place inside the hall. After a short time, their voices became louder, more heated.
‘Something’s going on with those two and I’m not leaving until I find out what it is,’ I heard Jill hiss.
I took a step out into the open.
‘Hello, Jill,’ I said.
She glared at me and resumed her conversation with my husband without even acknowledging my greeting. ‘Like I said, I just need to know if she’s here, Tom.’
‘I already told you, Mum,’ Tom said firmly. ‘She’s not.’
‘Who are we talking about?’ I said innocently.
‘Audrey.’ Tom shrugged his shoulders, confusion furrowing his brow. ‘She’s gone missing from the shop, apparently. You didn’t say you’d been there.’
‘I called in when I was in town earlier. I didn’t even realise it was the place you worked, Jill, until I saw Audrey behind the counter.’
‘Rubbish! Why are you lying about it?’ Jill’s face burned crimson.
‘Mum!’ Tom’s face clouded.
‘Perhaps Bridget can help me out.’ She looked at me expectantly. ‘I wonder if you’d care to shed any light on why you and Audrey were huddled together, whispering in the shop?’
‘I’d hardly call having a casual chat huddled together, Jill.’ I a
dopted a puzzled expression. ‘As I said, I didn’t know it was your place of work until—’
‘Oh please.’ Jill threw back her head and laughed. ‘Tom, even you must see she’s lying through her—’
‘I think you should leave, Mum,’ Tom said curtly. ‘Come back when you’re feeling a bit calmer, yeah?’
Jill was unfazed.
‘Let Bridget answer my question, please. What were you talking about with Audrey?’
I stared back at her and said nothing.
Jill addressed Tom. ‘They were obviously both shocked to see me. Bridget ran out almost immediately and Audrey went to make a drink and did a disappearing act without saying a word to me.’
‘Are you feeling OK, Jill?’ I looked at her hot flushed face with concern. ‘Audrey was fine when I left – and I certainly didn’t run out. I saw you were agitated, so I thought it best to leave.’
‘Don’t you lie like this.’ She spat out the words, stepping forward until she was almost toe to toe with me. ‘You are a sly, underhanded—’
‘Mum! Seriously, you need to leave.’ Tom placed his hands on her shoulders and oriented her carefully but firmly towards the door.
She wailed and tried to resist his pushing, and I realised this was my chance.
‘Wait, Tom!’ I called out. ‘Let me explain properly what happened.’ They both turned to face me. I hesitated before continuing. ‘Jill, I honestly didn’t realise it was the charity shop you worked at. The trustees at work have been talking about the possibility of the charity opening our own shop to help raise funds locally, and the window display looked attractive. I just called in there on the off chance.’
‘There you go, Mum,’ Tom said, relieved. ‘Perfectly reasonable.’
Jill’s face darkened, but I continued before she interrupted. ‘Audrey was in there and we got chatting. Nothing cloak-and-dagger; I’m afraid that’s all in your head, Jill.’ I forced my lips into a smile. ‘While I was there, I took the opportunity of asking her if you were OK, because you’d been a bit prickly at the dinner party. That’s all it was.’
