by K. L. Slater
Jill frowned. ‘So what was the problem?’
Audrey felt irritation swell in her chest. ‘The problem was, the man she hated, who was such a presence in her life … he was Ellis’s father.’
Jill’s forehead wrinkled as she wrestled with this information that didn’t match up to the facts she’d internalised. ‘But Jesse was Ellis’s father.’
Audrey reached for her hand, held it tight in her own. ‘No, he wasn’t.’
‘I don’t want to hear it.’ Jill snatched her hand away and stood up, her face reddening. ‘Please leave now, Audrey.’
‘Jill, no! I haven’t finished. I have to tell you—’
She covered her ears with her hands and raised her voice. ‘I don’t want to know. Do you hear me? Go! I want you to go.’ She turned and ran out of the room.
Audrey called after her, but she already heard Jill’s feet hammering on the stairs. Then the bathroom door slammed shut.
She took the sealed envelope with Jill’s name on it from her handbag and propped it up on the mantelpiece. She prayed when her friend opened it and read the shattering contents, she would find it in her heart to forgive her for the terrible secret she’d kept from her.
Fifty-Four
Jill
The front door opened and slammed closed again. From the front bedroom window, I watched Audrey scuttle away from the house, her coat done up, head down.
My insides cramped. I’d thought I knew Audrey as well as I knew myself. I would have wagered this very house against the chance she’d ever betray me. Now I knew she’d been in league all this time not with Bridget, but with Coral.
I watched until she reached the bend in the road and disappeared from sight. I went back downstairs, poured a glass of water and took it through to the living room. The instant I stepped through the door, I saw it. A long white envelope with JILL written on it in thick black letters, large enough to read from across the room.
I put my glass down on the coffee table and picked up the envelope, turning it over in my hands. The flap was sealed and I felt a substantial fold of paper inside, more than one sheet.
I didn’t want to hear what she had to tell me because I already knew. I knew what she was going to say about Ellis’s father and the life-changing implications of that … I couldn’t bear it.
I jumped at a sudden noise in the hall – the front door opening. I rushed to the window and saw the silver car on the drive.
‘Tom!’
He stood in the doorway and slid the door key into his pocket. ‘I had to come back to speak to you, Mum. I can’t go on like this, so many things not being said.’ He glanced at the envelope in my hand. ‘What’s that?’
‘Audrey was here. She left me this envelope. I ran upstairs because I didn’t want to hear the rubbish she was spouting.’ But I knew my words meant nothing. I felt the truth towering over us as each second passed.
Two red spots appeared on his cheeks. ‘Rubbish about what?’ he whispered.
I hesitated. Then, sick of all the pretence, I wailed, ‘About who Ellis’s father is! She was going to tell me something I don’t want to hear it. Do you understand?’ I looked at him meaningfully. ‘I don’t want to know, from you or her. I can’t take it, I—’
‘Oh, Mum.’ He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around me. I sobbed into his warm chest, crushing the sealed envelope between us.
I’d waited so long to have my boy back again. My affectionate, loyal son. I didn’t care about Audrey and her petty little secrets.
‘Let’s sit down, Mum. It’s time for us to talk.’
I pulled away. ‘No.’
‘It’s long overdue,’ Tom said carefully. ‘And there are things you should know. Things I should have told you way before now.’ He sat down, but I stayed standing. ‘Let me have the envelope, and then we’ll talk.’
With shaking hands, I held it up. ‘I know already, Tom. I know what I’m going to find when I open this.’
‘Give that to me, Mum,’ he said steadily, his eyes trained on the envelope that held the awful reality I had no choice now but to face. ‘Don’t open it.’
‘Why? Because it’s going to tell me you’re Ellis’s father, not Jesse?’ I tore at the seal.
‘Don’t do this until we’ve talked about it,’ Tom yelped, jumping up from his seat.
‘What have you done?’ I yelled as I backed away. ‘Have you given away my grandson? Is it going to tell me that Ellis is my boy, not Bridget’s? He heard you and Coral arguing about the secret Jesse told you that night.’
I gripped the back of a dining chair for support. For the first time in twenty-eight years, I saw what Robert had been telling me all this time. That Tom, my beloved son whom I’d defended, fought for and believed above everyone else, was actually a liar and a cheat and, to cover up his terrible deed, had deprived me of knowing my grandson for the first nine years of his life.
I gulped in air and broke into pieces from the inside out.
‘Mum, please. Let me explain.’ He walked towards me and I backed towards the door, still clutching the envelope. ‘I’ll tell you everything myself, from the beginning. You don’t want to find out from a piece of paper.’
For a couple of seconds, I actually thought about it. I yearned to sit down with my son, the two of us, to talk honestly. It was all I’d wanted to do since his release from prison, but I’d been so naïve. He’d already been lying to me for years.
I bolted for the downstairs cloakroom. He moved fast behind me, gaining ground, and then there was a crack and he yelled out in pain. Maybe he’d collided with a chair or the table in his rush to get to me, but I didn’t stop to see if he was OK like the old Jill would have done. I bashed the cloakroom door open and slammed it shut behind me, snapping on the light and locking the door. Moments later, he banged on the door like a madman.
‘Mum, what the hell’s got into you? Open this door.’ His fist hammered so hard I feared the wood might splinter. ‘Open it now!’
I hadn’t got much time. With my heart banging too fast and too hard, I ripped open the envelope and pulled out the folded sheets within. The banging stopped.
‘This is your last chance to save yourself the heartache, Mum. Your last chance to let me explain everything. We can sit down together, you and me … what do you say?’
‘I’ve listened to your lies too long, Tom,’ I cried out.
I felt sick and dizzy, but I unfolded the sheets.
I stared at the letter in front of me. It was from some sort of laboratory, addressed to Coral McKinty, and the words leapt off the page at me:
We have analysed the DNA samples you submitted and the results are a match. Please see below for further details of the …
Like a star popping out in the night sky, the shining truth I’d suspected and dreaded in equal measure was now facing me. It was the only thing amid all the lies, deceit and confusion that made absolute sense.
‘Mum?’ I heard Tom call hoarsely from the other side of the door. ‘Are you OK?’
I blinked rapidly to clear my eyes of the tears welling there. Nine years. Nine long years I’d had a precious grandson and Bridget Wilson had filled my role. She’d loved and cared for Ellis, seen his first smile, watched him crawl and walk and run. These were my gifts that were now lost forever.
‘Mum! Open the door.’
I gathered myself and refocused on the letter.
Please see below for further details of likely DNA relationship between the two samples: Tom Billinghurst and Ellis McKinty.
Close family members, possibly siblings.
I frowned. Close family members, possibly siblings? I was expecting to see ‘father and son’. I tried to make sense of the wording.
‘Mum?’ All the urgency and anger had gone from Tom’s voice. ‘Open the door. Please.’
I read the results again, mouthing the words silently.
… likely DNA relationship between the two samples:
Close family members, possibly
siblings.
I slumped like a lead weight, sinking down into the floor. I twisted around and unlocked the door. A moment later, Tom stood in front of me, his face wretched and sagging.
‘Ellis is my half-brother, Mum. That’s what I’ve tried to protect you from all these years.’
I looked up. The shape of my son was blurred and vague. I blinked and tears rolled down my cheeks, clearing my vision.
Tom crouched down in front of me and took my hands. His fingers were warm and reassuring as he squeezed them gently.
‘It was Dad who betrayed you,’ he said. ‘It’s Dad who’s been lying through his teeth all this time. Not me. Dad is Ellis’s father.’
Fifty-Five
Tom
‘Remember all those times Dad offered to pick us up late from our nights out? We couldn’t quite believe he was being so helpful?’ Jill stayed tight-lipped and silent. ‘Coral told me she had sex with him twice.’
A small sound of disbelief escaped Jill’s lips. He had no choice but to carry on now, he had to say the terrible things.
‘She was drunk both times. He didn’t force her; she was a willing partner. To her it was something that happened a couple of times at the end of the night and she knew Dad really well because …’
‘Go on,’ Jill whispered.
‘She’d been going to him for counselling sessions. Through college. She said that Dad was really kind to her and that they’d chat on the way home. She said he made her feel safe, ironically.’ Tom hesitated. ‘It’s hard to explain but all my mates really liked Dad. He was … so different with them than he was with me. I used to wonder what was so wrong with me that he wasn’t like that at home. I know you probably can’t imagine it, Mum, but he was.’
‘I’ve seen it with my own eyes,’ Jill said softly. ‘He’s like that with Ellis, too.’
Tom felt a surge of inadequacy, but he battled it back. He had to get this all out. It might be his only chance if the police came for him.
‘Anyway, she forgot to take her pill she said and fell pregnant. She was pretty certain the baby was Dad’s because she and Jesse had been going through a rocky patch for a while and they hadn’t slept together.’ He paused for a moment before continuing. It was beyond weird to be discussing all this with her. ‘She said she felt like Jesse didn’t care about her any more, and there had even been rumours he’d been seeing other girls. When she found out she was pregnant, she seriously considered not going through with it.’
‘Did she tell Robert?’
‘Yes. And he told her to get rid of the baby. Coral said it was like he’d flipped a switch and all the compassion and kindness disappeared in an instant.’
They looked at each other. They both knew only too well that this side of Robert existed even though he didn’t show it to the world.
‘Dad told her he wouldn’t see her for counselling and the lifts home were done. He completely cut her off. Then Jesse died and Bridget immediately became territorial about the baby, promised Coral she’d look after both her and the baby. So Coral said nothing to me or to Bridget and decided instead to pass the baby off as Jesse’s.’
Jill frowned, the cogs turning in her head as she struggled to process the awful facts. ‘So, Jesse never knew about Robert?’
‘That’s the thing. On the morning of the day Jesse died, Coral found texts on Jesse’s phone. He’d been secretly seeing another girl. They had a terrible argument and Coral lost her temper, threw the truth of what she’d done with Dad at him to hurt him. That’s why Jesse wanted us to go out that night. To tell me about Dad and Coral.’
Jill shook her head, unable to comprehend it. ‘She actually told Jesse that Robert was the baby’s father?’
‘Yep. Even though she wasn’t a hundred per cent sure, she said it in the heat of the argument. Jesse was excited about the baby and she wanted to really hurt him after finding out he’d been unfaithful.’
‘She didn’t have DNA proof back then?’
Tom shook his head. ‘That didn’t happen until years later. When Jesse died she was terrified of the truth coming out and Bridget disowning her and the baby. But needing to know the truth tortured her and when Ellis was five, she had his DNA analysed. The result in itself didn’t mean anything, but she kept it for a reason.’
Jill frowned. ‘She was waiting until you got out of prison.’
Tom nodded. ‘She never saw Dad again and she didn’t want anything to do with him, either. She had Bridget to help her financially. But as Ellis got older, Bridget became more and more controlling, and Coral got to the stage where she wanted out.’
‘Bridget truly believed Ellis was Jesse’s son and she was his blood grandparent,’ Jill whispered, and Tom saw the realisation dawning on her face that she wasn’t the only person who’d been terribly betrayed. ‘And why wouldn’t she?’
‘Jesse told Coral that day he was going to tell me what Dad had done and he was going to punish Robert, ruin him. Coral never got a chance to speak to me before I was arrested for Jesse’s manslaughter. But when Ellis was five, she wrote to me in prison and said that if I had a DNA test done too when I got out of prison, it would prove we had the same father and I was Ellis’s half-brother. It would be her passport to getting rid of Bridget. But there was another consideration. She didn’t want to let her nice life go, the life Bridget supported. So, together with Audrey, who she’d befriended at the shop, she came up with a plan. She realised that once she had the DNA evidence that Ellis was Robert’s son, she had the ability to make Dad pay – literally.’
His mother frowned. ‘Pay maintenance for Ellis, you mean?’
Tom laughed sadly. ‘Oh, she wanted a lot more than that. Between them, she and Audrey cooked up a plan to blackmail Dad. Maintenance payments would be peanuts, but if Dad was faced with losing his marriage, his job, his standing in the local community, he might be persuaded to sell the house and pay her a good lump sum for her silence.’
Jill’s mouth fell open. ‘He asked me to sign something … I didn’t read it. Something to do with the mortgage.’
Tom shook his head. ‘Don’t worry about that now, Mum. We’ll have to sort everything out. The first thing is to get the truth out there.’
‘Audrey knew, you knew,’ Jill said in a small voice. ‘The people I loved the most.’
‘I had to make a decision in prison. If I’d told you on one of your visits it would have nearly killed you, sitting there in that awful visitors’ hall. You were so low, so desperate for us to be a family again. You, me and Dad. It was an easy decision for me, it had to wait until I was released.’
‘And Bridget?’
‘I’m going to speak to Bridget when I leave here,’ he said with a weary sigh.
‘Hang on a minute.’ Jill raised a finger as a thought occurred to her. ‘You married Bridget knowing that Ellis was probably your half-brother.’
‘Yes,’ Tom said quietly.
‘Did you marry her so you’d be close to him?’
He felt sad to see the hope in his mother’s eyes. Hope that he’d reveal he didn’t have feelings for Bridget after all.
‘No, Mum. I married Brid because I love her. But I’d been desperate to keep on good terms with her because of Ellis. I wrote so many letters during that first year. In one of them, at my lowest point, I told her the truth about Dad being Ellis’s father. But she destroyed that letter and all the others without reading them. So the truth never came to light. Then when we did the restorative justice programme together, we got closer and I fell in love with her. I married her for the right reasons.’
‘I see,’ Jill said softly. Then, ‘I’m glad about that. I’d hate to think you’d been so cold and calculating. That’s not the way I raised you.’
Tom nodded. ‘Apart from that one letter, Coral never made contact with me again in prison and I had to put up with that. It got easier as time went on to push the truth about Ellis to the back of my mind, but then when my release date got closer, it loomed large again.�
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‘And once you did get out?’
‘I spoke to Coral straight away. I’d had a DNA test done in prison as part of the restorative justice programme. They fund certain procedures if they think it will help an inmate’s mental health and privately, I’d told the programme’s counsellor I had doubts about my own father. I didn’t know Coral was involved with Audrey and that she’d come up with a scam to get money out of Dad. When I saw she’d given you a sealed letter today, I knew it would be the truth about the DNA match showing that me and Ellis shared the same father. I never wanted you to find out that way.’
‘But still, you’ve never said a word until now. Until Coral was dead.’
‘It killed me to see you hating Bridget so much when you were living with the enemy under this roof all that time. But I struggled exactly how to do it. I knew so many people would be shattered by the truth: you, Bridget, Ellis … the list goes on.’
‘And Coral?’ Jill said carefully. ‘Do you know exactly what happened to her?’
He looked her in the eyes. ‘No. I don’t know what happened, Mum, but once I’ve spoken to Bridget, I have to tell the police the truth about Dad.’
Fifty-Six
Bridget
‘There’s something I have to tell you. Something I should have told you a long time ago,’ Tom said.
‘You’re scaring me now.’ I swallowed, my wet fingers fluttering to my throat. ‘What is it?’
My shoulders and neck had been tight and painful when Tom had dropped Ellis and I back at the house after visiting the police station. Ellis had gone to his room to catch up on sleep and Tom had insisted on going back to see his mother alone. I’d got in the hot tub to ease the tension and dissipate the fury I felt towards Tom for lying to me about the gym and then sloping off to see Jill when we badly needed his support here.
He had returned from his mother’s house looking like a beaten man, and when I refused to go back inside the house and talk to him, he’d got in the tub with me.
