by Jerri Hines
Despite the woman’s tendency to gossip, Cathryn discovered she enjoyed Mrs. Montgomery’s company. The woman loved her family. Although, she acknowledged to Cathryn, she lacked her nursing skills.
“I have never had the ability to nurse others. Livy, my maid, has been with me since I was a child. She does such a better job than me, but you, my dear, you did a remarkable thing,” Mrs. Montgomery said while they sat upon the deck. “Of course, I should have never allowed you to help...but we won’t mention it to anyone. You understand, I know. It wasn’t proper, but there wasn’t another option at that time, but people wouldn’t understand. Your father would frown upon it I am certain, but I’m no monster. That poor child. I don’t know what’s to become of her now. If she returns to Charles Town, what will be left for her?”
“I have been thinking about Mary,” Cathryn said, turning slightly to get better light for her sketching. “Don’t you believe I may need a companion? I know she is young, but her being from my home, it would give me a sense of well-being. I’ll be honest with you, Mrs. Montgomery. I am nervous about England. I don’t know anyone. I have family, I know, and will no doubt be well looked after, but do you think it may be a viable option?”
“She could never be a chaperone, my dear.” Mrs. Montgomery eyed her carefully.
“I understand, but I shouldn’t need one in reality. I have my grandmother. Since I’m only planning on being here a year, it would give Mary time to recover fully...to come up with options for her.”
“You have a good heart, my dear, but let me check with Mrs. Peterson. What will your grandmother say to such a suggestion?” Mrs. Montgomery asked. She sighed as she saw her youngest trying to climb up the mast. “Peter, climb down from there. You’re going to fall. I don’t care if your brother dared you. Pray, excuse me for a moment.”
From that day forward, time passed pleasantly. Mary, timid and shy, stayed close to Cathryn’s side after Mrs. Montgomery had talked with Mrs. Peterson. Cathryn had become her protector. Mrs. Peterson had thought it a wonderful idea, not that she wanted to impose upon Cathryn, but it would so help out Mary in her time of need.
The weather improved greatly with not even a mention of rain after the initial storm. The days were spent on the deck in the sun. It was the nights that were the hardest, for Cathryn found she couldn’t read because of the dimness of the ship. They weren’t allowed to use lanterns, for fear of fires. Cathryn learned to stay above deck until she had no choice but to retire.
Moreover, a change had occurred in her relationship with Lieutenant Pennington, Jake, now as she called him in private. She looked for him at certain times and found herself quite disappointed if he didn’t appear.
She had the time to draw. She sketched the faces of the two young Montgomerys, which in itself took time, for neither would stay still long enough. Mrs. Montgomery seemed pleased with the results when she finished.
Cathryn found herself sketching Lieutenant Pennington, when he wasn’t looking. He looked so handsome in the ocean sun with the breeze blowing back his natural dark hair, for during the voyage he hadn’t worn his wig. Although at times he would catch her studying him with her sketch pad in hand, he would smile at her, a disarming, charismatic smile. Then she would hastily begin drawing again.
Cathryn had caught him staring at her, also. She found herself doing what she had laughed at others for doing. Her heart leaped when she heard his voice. She had reprimanded herself for finding herself laughing at his jokes at dinner. He walked with her most nights afterwards. They talked of everything. She told him of her life at Elm Bluff and he listened. He talked of his home in such a way she longed to see the ocean waves crash against the cliffs.
Tacy watched but said nothing. She didn’t have to for Mrs. Montgomery had observed the growing connection between the two. She had hinted at times to Cathryn, but Cathryn, as was her manner, paid no mind. To her thinking, she wasn’t doing anything wrong. Mrs. Montgomery cornered Cathryn before the end of their journey.
“It will all work out I’m sure, Cathryn,” Mrs. Montgomery said. “Everyone will love you. I hope, though, no one will say anything about Lieutenant Pennington.”
“Say what about Lieutenant Pennington?” Cathryn asked, indignant by the implication.
“Well, dear, I have been responsible for you. I know there has been nothing inappropriate, but I hope no one gets another impression. I know that both of you are young. It was only natural to be drawn to each other,” Mrs. Montgomery rattled on.
“Mrs. Montgomery! Nothing...”
“Now, now, dear, calm down. I know. I talked with Mr. Montgomery about this at length last night. It’s just coming into England, your grandparents will have certain expectations and it doesn’t come with a poor young lieutenant upon your arm,” Mrs. Montgomery said frankly.
“I can assure you...”
Mrs. Montgomery reached over and patted Cathryn’s hand. “I know, child. I have become quite fond of you. If I ever have a girl, I would want her to be just as you are. Kind, compassionate; I see it within your eyes, your actions, but I would do you an injustice if I didn’t try to tell you what I see. You don’t have your mother. God bless her soul. But when we left Charles Town, I thought you and William Peyton might be making a match of it with you talking of only staying a year. And now this young lieutenant...”
“Mrs. Montgomery, I can assure you that William and I have no agreement. We are friends, only. As for the lieutenant...”
Mrs. Montgomery wouldn’t let her finish a sentence. “That is good for I had feared. With me being responsible and all, I don’t want you to tarnish your reputation with all you have in front of yourself. Your father put such faith into me; you understand, my dear.”
Cathryn took a deep breath. She could see Tacy sitting by, holding back laughter for her to have taken such a lecture and had no opportunity to defend herself. Mrs. Montgomery hadn’t wanted or needed for Cathryn to give her input. She had said what was needed, but what she didn’t know was that Cathryn would never meekly walk away.
* * * *
There was a chill in the air, but Cathryn took no notice. Pulling her shawl tighter around her, she stood in the night’s breeze and inhaled deeply. Tacy had not said a word. There was no need. Cathryn realized Tacy feared she was asking for trouble. She was. She had to see him.
Above her, a quarter moon sat in the cloudless sky, reflecting off the still ocean water with the stars twinkling in the distance. Cathryn stared upward hoping and praying Jake would appear. Then he was there.
“I’m glad to have found you here,” he said, walking up beside her.
“I’ve been warned, Lieutenant, not to linger long in your company. Mrs. Montgomery is afraid people will begin to talk. I don’t think she wants to be held responsible for my tarnished reputation.”
“I see nothing wrong,” he said. “Your maid is within reaching distance and I imagine can hear every word we say.”
She turned abruptly right into him. His hand went around her waist. Instinctively, she looked up into his eyes. Mesmerized, she couldn’t breathe as he reached over and caressed her face. She melted with his touch...his look. In an endless moment in time, she couldn’t take her eyes off of his. She thought he was going to kiss her, but the moment passed.
He released his grip. Her heart sank. Feeling dejected, she turned from him.
“Don’t, Cathryn. Mrs. Montgomery isn’t wrong to be concerned,” he said. “The ship is too tight quarters when two feel as we do. I see you every day. You are within my reach. And yet, so far away. The ship will dock tomorrow and everything will change.”
She whipped back around. Her eyes blazing, she challenged him, “That is why you came tonight? You have come to say goodbye to me. Do not lie. I can see it in your eyes. Tell me...tell me, Jake. Are you are leaving me? Is that what you have come to do? To say it was nothing, only the close quarters upon a ship! How dare you! Make me want you and now back away. Moreover, don’t you dare tell me what I
’m supposed to feel!”
“Tomorrow is a different day. You will see how it is...I have my own responsibilities as you have yours. Remember when you first came aboard. You said you were only biding your time for a year? Now you believe you want something else. How do you know what you will feel on the morrow?”
She wanted to scream at him that she had never felt what she did when she was around him. Why did this have to change? He had told her he was only a simple lieutenant. She didn’t care. Oh, Heavens! She had fallen hopelessly in love with him.
“So you don’t care for me,” she cried. “Don’t tell me such! I could not take those words.”
“I don’t know what I want you to take with you,” he whispered. “It is for your best. You will see.”
She took her fist and hit him upon his chest, her temper exploding. “For my best! How dare you try to tell me leaving me is for the best! How can you say such—”
She didn’t have a chance for another word. He cupped her face in his hands and his lips came down upon hers, softly at first. She trembled in his arms as her lips pulsed gently against his own.
Somewhere in the madness, the reason for meeting this night escaped her mind. Only being with him...in his arms with his lips upon hers mattered. He kissed her over and over again, ravishing her mouth.
She returned his attentions as gasps of pleasure escaped her. Her body was shocked at the depth of emotion he provoked within her. She was lost in his essence. Then his lips broke from hers, lingering briefly before he released her.
“See what you made me do,” he uttered. “This is why I can’t—”
“No, please, Jake, don’t leave me. Don’t tell me I won’t see you again,” she pleaded.
“It’s not to be, Cathryn. By God, I wish it was.”
“Don’t tell me that, Jake. Tell me what to do so we can be together.”
His eyes softened in the moonlight. “I can’t ask that of you.”
She took his hand and kissed it, terrified of losing him. Losing what they had before it had a chance to begin. “Why? Tell me, Jake. Why? Can you not give me hope? This can’t be goodbye. It can’t. I would die.”
He stood in silence for a moment. His gaze fixed upon hers reflecting a longing that both suffered. He took her one last time in his arms and kissed her. Breaking from her, he caressed her face one last time, turned and walked away.
Chapter 4
Cathryn smiled out the window of her bedroom in her grandparent’s London townhouse. She couldn’t contain her excitement. She was having a coming out ball. She wore the most gorgeous of gowns, a lovely sapphire blue dress creation. Her chestnut locks were twisted in an upswept fashion and delicate spirals framed her face.
Her hair was held back by a brilliant jeweled tiara, adorned with sapphires and diamonds. Her grandmother had given the tiara to her...it had been her mother’s...a priceless gift. Never had she felt so alive!
She had anticipated this moment since that dreadful last night aboard the Victoria. How she had cried herself to sleep! Until in the morning when the comprehension of the situation dawned upon her...he loved her! She knew he did and clung to that knowledge.
How proper Jake had been the next morning! Her anger wouldn’t let her even acknowledge his presence while he introduced himself to her grandfather. She ignored him, even though his eyes implored her. It wasn’t going to be goodbye...not if she could help it.
Over a month had passed since she had seen Jake, but her amour had not diminished. All her energy had been spent to bring about this moment. Now she waited to be called down to make her appearance. She held no doubt he would be among the guests.
Her grandfather, who to her surprise wasn’t much older than her father, was a handsome gentleman with silver hair, a rather aquiline nose and kindly mouth. Reserved in manner, he seemed at first taken aback by her affectionate welcome when she hugged him upon introduction.
Reservations her grandfather may have held toward his affectionate granddaughter melted long before Cathryn arrived in London. Her charms beguiled her grandfather. Soon she had him in agreement with her that a companion from her own home would be beneficial. Without issue, she had attached little Mary to her entourage.
It had been a beautiful spring day when Cathryn made her entrance into London. The whole of the city fascinated her. She had never visited a city this large. It bustled with activity and there were so many people.
The carriage brought her to a lovely gray stone mansion on Park Lane, an impressive sight designed in the classic style, and executed in stone and stucco brick. In front of the house was a grand park. Her grandfather informed her it was called Hyde Park and all around the house were similar massive structures, equally as grand.
Excitement built within as she stepped into the elegant foyer. Perhaps she would enjoy her adventure. The home exuded luxury on every turn of her head, from the crystal chandelier to the marble flooring leading to a beautifully curved staircase.
She had followed her grandfather up the stairs and along a corridor to where the footman opened a door to the drawing room. It was impressive as well. The large room had an overabundance of beautiful stylish furnishings. The red silk curtains accented the rich cream color of the room. A portrait hung over the fireplace of a beautiful young lady sitting with her hands folded in the most dignified manner. Sitting underneath the portrait in a plush velvet cushion chair, Cathryn found the older version of the lady, her grandmother.
Her grandmother sat stiffly upon the chair. Her posture, her being, illuminated the status of her position in life. Elegantly dressed, her dark gray-streaked hair was pulled back in a manner that no hair was out of place.
Her eyes coolly surveyed Cathryn from head to toe. Without blinking an eye, she nodded ever so slightly in approval. With only a slight hesitation, Cathryn politely curtsied and bent down and kissed her grandmother’s cheek quickly assessing her charms would not yield the same results as they had with her grandfather.
“Sit, my dear. Your journey must have been long,” her grandmother said in a tone that seemed best not to question. “I’m sorry if I seem out of sorts, but it has all been emotional for me. Your mother was your age when she left to marry your father and now...”
Cathryn sat without hesitation, but wondered briefly about her grandmother’s impassive greeting even with her proclamation of emotions. The woman looked as though she had never shed a tear.
“You don’t look like your mother,” her grandmother said solemnly, turning to one of the footmen. “Would you care to bring us some tea and sandwiches?” She turned back to Cathryn in the same motion. “I suppose it’s for the best. Your mother was never what one would call a beauty and you, my dear, how can I say this, have potential.”
“Thank you, Grandmother.”
“My other grandchildren call me Grandmamma.”
“Of course,” Cathryn paused briefly, “Grandmamma. I have so looked forward to meeting you instead of the exchange of letters.”
“I agree, my dear. I feel so much better with you safely on our shores. We have heard dreadful things about the colonies as of late. And now that you are here, we will have to get to know each other.”
Cathryn spent the next few hours detailing her youth to her grandmother, talking endlessly about Elm Bluff and her father, but never did she mention Sumner or Juriah, knowing well to hold back on the information.
“You have so many relatives to meet, Cathryn. You have your Aunt Esmeralda, Uncle Richard, and, of course, cousins. They have heard so much about you. We have such plans for your visit, especially hoping that you will extend it longer than what your father requested. I can’t imagine you going back with the troubles they are having across the ocean,” her grandmother said.
“Have they begun? I know only that Father was concerned about the situation. He wouldn’t talk much to me about the rising conflict,” Cathryn confessed.
“As well he shouldn’t,” her grandmother interjected. “It is not for your ears.
Now you are here, you need only to worry about the plans we have made for you.”
Within the week she had met her mother’s brother Richard and his wife Esmeralda. Their three children were older than Cathryn. Their two girls, Cecilia and Drusilla, were both married. Cecilia, Cathryn understood, was expecting her first child and wouldn’t be able to meet Cathryn at this time for she lived up North. Drusilla was in London for the season, had no children, and didn’t live far from her parents in the summer house in Devon.
Their only son, Reginald, or Reggie as his family called him, had as of yet not married. He was decent to look at, Cathryn supposed, but his nose pointed too sharply and his eyes had a waned look about them. He had a personality, though, that she found made up for his lack of good looks. She found him quite amusing and entertaining.
“I need to warn you, Cousin. They are in the midst of marrying you off,” Reggie said at the first opportunity Grandmamma wouldn’t overhear his words. “With your looks and money, it won’t take long I imagine.”
“And if I have no desire to be married off?” Cathryn countered.
“Ah, you’re going to break Grandmamma’s heart if she isn’t allowed to match make with you, Cathryn,” he teased. “She has talked of nothing else for the last year after my sisters were married, mind you. Besides, it takes her mind off of me.”
She laughed and found she could never take Reggie too seriously. But she took his warning in earnest about Grandmamma’s desire to marry her off for she realized that her grandmother’s aspirations for her were different from her own. She never mentioned her lieutenant to her grandmother as a suitor, not yet at least. She would be patient.
She had written her father numerous letters, but had only received one back. One he wrote before he had known she had arrived safely. Communication took a great deal of time which frustrated her to no end, but she had been so busy with all the fittings that needed to be accomplished before she could be introduced. Even though the season had already begun, her grandmother didn’t see the sense in holding Cathryn back. She was certain she would be a success.
