by Susan Rohrer
“He names all the prepositions in alphabetical order.”
Kate looked at her roommate, agape. “How did you know that?”
“Because that’s what you do. He probably got it off your profile.”
Kate took M.J.’s suggestion in, more puzzled than ever. “That’s what’s kind of wigging me. Most of it...I never put it on the profile.”
seven
♥
Kate was purposely late for Antonio’s class. It wasn’t like her to be tardy. By and large, she made a point to be punctual, if not early. But knowing that Dustin and Wissy would be putting up their scene didn’t make the idea of showing up at all for this particular class attractive.
Still, there was something that drew Kate to the theater. Whether it was a sense of responsibility or a punishing curiosity, Kate found herself wandering into the darkened space and easing into a seat behind her teacher and peers, just as Dustin and Wissy took the stage, scripts in hand. They waited for Antonio’s cue to start.
Dustin shuffled his feet. He looked up at Wissy with a chagrined expression. “I’m sorry,” he read. “I don’t mean to... I know that thing that happened between us yesterday, it was unprofessional.”
Wissy stepped toward Dustin coyly, playing against the written words. “What were we thinking? We just won’t let it happen again. That’s all.”
Dustin took a step closer. “We should draw boundaries.”
“And stick to them.”
Dustin brushed a tendril away from Wissy’s cheek. “Absolutely.”
Ever the coquette, Wissy gazed longingly into Dustin’s eyes. “Because, we don’t want to let this interfere with our working relationship.”
“There’s that,” Dustin replied, millimeters away from her.
Kate squirmed in her seat at the back of the theater. The innocence of her own portrayal of this character was far from Wissy’s take on it. It was one thing for Kate to contemplate what was going on between Dustin and Wissy outside of class, but it was quite another to see it play out right in front of her, sparking like the fourth of July.
Their kiss started softly, and then grew in its intensity. Kate wanted desperately to avert her attention, but somehow, she couldn’t help but watch. With each bewildering moment, the knife sunk deeper into her heart.
Mercifully, Antonio cleared his throat to curtail the scene, but Dustin and Wissy continued to kiss, lost in the moment.
Hot tears brimmed in Kate’s eyes. Finally, she tore her gaze away, unable to watch any longer.
“Well, then,” Antonio interrupted. “Very good.” Antonio turned to the class. “Who can tell me why that scene worked?”
♥ ♥ ♥
“It’s the chemistry. Plain and simple,” Samantha intoned as she handed another day’s pay to Eric. “You’ve got it with the lens, they imagine it’s with them—three hundred fifty-eight of them by last count—all across this nation. I have a proposition for you, Eric.”
Eric marveled as he spotted his sizable take, especially since he’d only agreed to this job to fill in the financial blanks between acting gigs. “I’m listening.”
“Our license with you is domestic, but my instinct is that you could have global potential.”
“As in around the world? That globe?”
Samantha sashayed past her desk toward Eric. “I thought it might be interesting to discuss it over dinner. Say eight o’clock. My place.”
Immediately, Eric’s radar went up. Everything in him told him this didn’t seem to be an entirely business-oriented proposition. “Your place. That might be—”
Sam moved closer, toying with him. “Are you as bored with take-out as I am, Eric? I’ll cook.”
Eric swallowed hard, his mind racing.
Samantha held his gaze, her meaning plain.
Eric cleared his throat, stalling for a way to redirect. “Well, no, actually I...I think I’d rather just keep my position with you...domestic, I guess.”
Smoothly, Samantha retreated a bit, completely unruffled. A shrewd expression arched across her brow. “Darling, do you know how many there are of you, how many beautiful faces with underdeveloped talent and sub-par personalities populate L.A.?”
Eric raised his hands apologetically. “Hey, I’m not looking to rankle anybody. I just need this job.”
“And you only have it because you are an unknown,” Sam reminded. “The minute you become known, you’re useless to me. Did you realize that?”
“No, I—”
Samantha waltzed away. “Yes, that’s precisely my on-going challenge, to find stupendously good-looking Imaginaries who will never succeed in compromising their value to me by making a legitimate name for themselves.”
His ego bruised, Eric’s eyes flashed. “Hey, I was into three callbacks on an infomercial last week.”
Sam sat. “Was it by any chance for male-patterned hair loss? They must have noticed that you’re thinning.”
Eric self-consciously fingered his temples. “I have a naturally high forehead.”
“So did Ray Cooley,” Sam retorted.
“Who?”
Sam smiled tightly, her gloves off. “My point exactly. The clock is ticking on your marketability, Eric.”
“It is?”
Samantha nodded. “Odds are I just gave you more than you’ll see this entire year from your little thespian exploits. So, note to self: It might be prudent to take another gander at exactly where your bread is buttered.”
“Oh, no. Uh-uh,” Eric protested. “We have a contract.”
Sam folded her hands comfortably in front of herself. “Indeed. We do. One that clearly states that there are no guarantees. Humanity is fickle, Eric. It’s only good business to maintain a revolving door. If another new hunk should suddenly eclipse your popularity, well—as you know—you’re paid on commission.”
“But you’ve been pushing me with the drones!” Eric blustered.
“Have been,” Sam acknowledged. She let out a peeved breath and started to tap at her computer keyboard. “I’m also advertising for new faces, even as we speak. Would you care to see the size of my inbox?”
Eric struggled to maintain his footing, let alone his dignity. “Wait, so suddenly I’m on the outs here, just because I dodged some extracurricular dinner?”
Samantha held her regal head high. “I asked you to dinner to discuss the potential expansion of our business relationship at Virtually Mine. Even if you’d recorded this conversation, that’s all you could prove.”
Eric couldn’t help pacing. He could hardly believe this was happening at all. “This... This isn’t legal. It’s not, you know, right.”
If Samantha was sweating in the very least, she certainly didn’t show it. Her voice remained as smooth as her scarlet silk blouse. “Eric, Sweetheart. Morality is a relative term. Actors perform intimate acts with people they don’t even know, much less like, on camera for money, even awards. No matter how an agent packages it, it’s still high-class harlotry. You’re an actor. At least you claim to be. Let’s not pretend that you have scruples.”
Eric shook his head incredulously. He didn’t put much stock in spiritual things, but he felt like he was dealing with the devil himself.
♥ ♥ ♥
Waiting at Rob’s door with Freddie wagging his tail at her side could have been much more enjoyable for M.J. if she hadn’t been so acutely aware that she had company. Nervously, she glanced over as another Meter Mobile pulled up beside her abandoned one. M.J. whirled back as Rob opened the door.
At the sight of his master, Freddie wagged all over. Rob leaned down to pat his head. “Hey, there, Fella. Have a good time?”
M.J. smiled congenially, covering her concern the best that she could. “Yeah, he pretty much sniffed every blade of grass between here and the pier.”
As Rob unhooked Freddie’s leash, M.J. snuck a glance toward the street, just as the other Meter Maid got out to inspect M.J.’s abandoned vehicle. M.J. knew that this big-boned matron was eve
ry bit as humorless as she looked.
Rob nodded out toward a car out front. “That’s not your car, is it? It’s street sweeping day.”
M.J. covered. “No, no. I walked.”
Rob directed M.J.’s gaze to the two parking enforcement vehicles just down the block. “They’re out in force today.”
With horror, M.J. watched as the Meter Matron reached into M.J.’s vehicle and picked up M.J.’s quickly discarded uniform. “Yeah.”
Missing her anxiety completely, Rob closed Freddie inside the house. “So, I’m curious. This business of yours—I’m surprised he gets you all to himself, that you’re not walking more dogs.”
M.J. sputtered. “Oh, I have lots of other...dogs. It’s staggering the number of dogs I walk. Kind of a whole canine club I’m running here.”
“Freddie’s pretty social,” Rob replied. “Might do well with the group.”
Acceptingly, M.J. nodded, just as she saw the mother of all Meter Matrons take down her vehicle’s license. “Speaking of which, I’d better scoot. It’s a fast-paced life, this dog walking biz.”
“Okay. Thanks. See you tomorrow, then.” Rob stepped inside and called out to Freddie as he closed the door. “You hear that, Freddie. You’re going to be in a club!”
As soon as Rob disappeared, M.J. whipped around to the street. Her heart leapt into her throat as the departing matron’s Meter Mobile motored away.
What to do?
At a loss for a better idea, M.J. tore across Rob’s front yard in hot pursuit. In moments, M.J. skidded around the corner onto Ocean Avenue. Safely out of Rob’s earshot, she cried out to the escaping vehicle. “Hey, wait... I was on my break!”
Under normal circumstances, M.J. wasn’t much of a runner. But as she darted on foot past mid-day traffic, she found her inner athlete. What she’d do when she caught up with the matron, M.J. didn’t really know, but she’d figure that out when it came to it.
The matron’s Meter Mobile was blocks ahead, but M.J. could tell she was gaining on her. “Please, please, please...yes!” M.J. cried as the traffic light ahead turned yellow. Incredibly, the matron putted through, just as it turned red. “Stop! What are you crazy?! That was totally red!”
What she lacked in speed, M.J. made up with determination. Dissuaded only momentarily, M.J. sprinted as fast as her not so very long legs would carry her.
♥ ♥ ♥
Why it was that Dustin and Wissy had to squarely position themselves in front of the only open exit to the theater, Kate didn’t know. Everything in Kate wanted to melt into a puddle, evaporate into thin air, and quietly waft away. Despite her longing to do just that, she still found herself fighting through the clamor of ingénues lavishing praise upon Dustin, angling for the chance to be his next scene partner.
Her heart beyond flattened within her, Kate squeezed by as Wissy protectively claimed Dustin as her own, clenching him by his sculpted bicep. It was a move Dustin did nothing to discourage.
Finally free, Kate burst out of the theater and into the throng of pedestrian traffic on the popular Third Street Promenade.
A talent scout with a clipboard called out to Kate, “Hey, looking for love? I’m casting for a reality dating show.”
Wordlessly, Kate blasted by him. She fought the urge to whip back with a sarcastic retort, but she pressed her lips together so nothing of what came to mind in the moment would dare exit her mouth. She knew she seemed old-fashioned, but she hated herself for even thinking the kind of things her peers didn’t hesitate to say. Her mother’s advice rang in her ears that what came out of a person under pressure was exactly what was bottled up inside. Sweetness or bile, the words of Kate’s mouth would define her, and no matter how much her heart ached, bitter just wasn’t who she was.
Instead, Kate just ran. She bolted past shoppers, street musicians, and infuriatingly cozy couples, walking hand in hand. She swerved around the corner onto Arizona Avenue where she found herself in the middle of the area’s Farmer’s Market. Locals ambled along, crisscrossing the street, browsing through booths for fruits and vegetables.
Weaving her way through vendors and foot traffic, Kate raced toward the bluff overlooking the Pacific, heaving with sobs. Had her eyes not been so blurred by tears, she might not have careened into M.J. who, as it happened, was barreling down the sidewalk along Ocean Avenue at the very same time, in hot pursuit of the escaping Meter Matron.
“Hey, watch where you’re—” M.J. startled, realizing just who had broken her stride. “Kate! Where are you going?”
“To throw myself off that cliff,” Kate blurted. “Wanna help?”
Heaving for breath, M.J. bent over. She took a forlorned last look at the escaping Meter Matron, as she disappeared into the distance. M.J. stood up, offered Kate a hand, and pulled her to her feet. “Come on.”
♥ ♥ ♥
As usual, a wide assortment of actors populated the casting co-op common area as Dustin swaggered through. Cats and their owners waited to audition. Impossibly limber ballerinas stretched and rose to their toes. Senior citizens in pajamas rehearsed. Moms went over lines with their kids.
Dustin’s chest filled as he returned to Wissy’s now familiar studio. It felt good to be called back, especially after the whole shirtless debacle of the first audition. What had seemed a disaster had turned into a bit of brilliance, he decided. It had not only set him apart amongst the crowd of contenders, it had also secured his spot in Wissy’s good graces.
A look of dismay on her face, Wissy looked Dustin up and down as he approached, wearing the same shirt he’d just had on for their scene in class. “Where’s the vest? They liked the vest. They thought you were quirky.”
His bubble burst, Dustin’s face fell. “Well, it wasn’t mine.”
“This is a callback, Dustin. I told you to wear the same thing.”
“I thought you meant the same thing I wore to class.”
Visibly annoyed, Wissy slapped a size card onto Dustin’s palm. “What are you, bush league? You always wear the same thing you wore to the first audition. That’s how they remember you. That’s what got you called back.”
Dustin watched, forlorned as Wissy skulked away. He distinctly noticed how quickly she softened and preened as Eric arrived. It wasn’t just realizing that Eric had also been called back that ate at Dustin. It was the flirty way that Wissy sidled up to Eric, like her interests were turning Eric’s way. Dustin listened intently for their exchange.
“Eric, hi,” Wissy cooed.
“Hey.” Eric scribbled his name on the sign-in sheet.
Wissy cozied up to Eric. “So, I heard you almost got that infomercial. Very impressive.”
Eric brushed it off congenially. “Well, you know. Sometimes it comes down to a look.”
Wissy leaned toward Eric and spoke in a stage whisper that Dustin couldn’t help but hear. “Don’t say I said so,” she purred, “but it was probably about their has-been of a name star not wanting to stand next to you.”
♥ ♥ ♥
Kate and M.J. wandered along the Palisades Park path. A little air and space had gone a long way toward calming Kate’s shattered spirit. It helped her get her eyes off herself to hear about what had brought M.J. to come crashing into her at exactly the right moment. The way M.J. told it, Kate couldn’t help laughing. It was like someone above had known just what the two of them needed and just when they would need it, someone who orchestrated everything for the best no matter how bewildering it might seem in the short run.
Kate gave M.J.’s shoulders an encouraging squeeze as they walked along. “You should go into the office. Explain.”
A smirk crossed M.J.’s lips. “Something tells me they won’t go for the moonlighting as a dog walker on company time part.”
“Maybe you could spin it somehow.”
M.J. nodded gamely. “Oh, I could spin it. But do I really want to write parking tickets for the rest of my life anyway?”
“It’s an honest living. Pays the rent.”
> A moment of silence passed before M.J. responded. “I guess I want more than that. Yeah, you wait tables for rent; but you’ve still got your acting. Some kind of dream to shoot for.”
“I’m never going back to that class, again,” Kate vowed. “He could have tied her shoelaces he was so far down her throat.”
“Impressive in some circles.”
“I mean, sure, Dustin...he’s a little self-involved, but aren’t they all?”
M.J. kicked at a pebble in her path. “Yeah, guys are pretty much suns and we’re like these planets, orbiting around them. That’s the order of the cosmos.”
Kate searched her soul, sensing a palpable change. “I was pretty okay with that, but this...with her... Why do I even still want him? But I look at those eyes of his and I’m, like, sucked into his vortex again and... Blechk! I hate this! I can’t believe I was starting to think he was the one. I really was.” Again, hot tears filled Kate’s eyes. It was over, she realized. But she wasn’t over him.
“We always think the one we’re seeing is the one,” M.J. sympathized. “Otherwise, why bother?”
Kate threw her head back mournfully. “For three wonderful months, Dustin was practically perfect.”
“Welcome to the end of the first trimester.”
“Huh?”
M.J. communicated experience in the way she shook her head. “Most any guy can behave for that long, even the compulsive ones. Then, it’s like—to the day—the real guy starts to pop out.”
Kate wiped her tear-streaked face. “So much for my buffer boy making him jealous.”
“You made me jealous,” M.J. retorted. “Does that count? What with the flowers and the whole cozy-schmozy phone call.”
Kate knew it was more than the flowers Brad had sent. Those were part of her rental fee. It was the way Brad seemed to go above and beyond that made Kate sigh. “I just wish Brad were real.”
“Well, he is real,” M.J. replied. “I mean, you talked to him. There’s a real guy working your file.”
