by Tina Lee
The roars of men filled the hall. Leo raised his hand to silence them. “Many aren’t with us today. They sacrificed their lives for the dream of a better tomorrow. This is not farewell, for there will come a time where we all meet again in the next life. So I say to the widows; be proud. And when the North reaps the fruit of peace, know that it was your men who helped planted the seeds.”
The men roared again, chanting “King Leo.”
“I never really understood the badge of Hector. For it is known far and wide that all my men are brave, but what I discovered, was that we also have brave women among us, and in particular, Elizabeth.”
My heart skipped a beat to the sound of my name.
“Elizabeth, rise.”
I stood, and all heads turned towards me. Oh my. Oh my. Oh my. Keep calm. Don’t embarrass yourself. Madam Irvine escorted me up the steps. “I’m proud of you, dear,” she said before handing me off to Leo. I could feel their eyes on me, judging. I stood beside Leo facing everyone below. I tried not to look at anyone except Ben and Sia, who were smiling at me.
He pinned the badge on me, and whispered in my ear, “You look beautiful.” Damn, Leo, why did you have to say that? I was supposed to be hating you.
“The badge of Hector honors the courageous, the one who did their duty in the face of death. Elizabeth has done the full extent of her duties, and I’m sure many of you can attest to that. She is one of us. Do you agree, my fellow shifters?”
Faces I recognized from the base chanted my name. The royals raised their eyebrows and looked at each other, trying to understand the pack’s acceptance of me, a human, and more so, a woman.
I cried, and Leo being the sweetheart he was, wiped my tears.
I had barely returned to my seat when Leo made an announcement.
“I know many of you have doubts about me,” Leo said. Rambles here, rambles there. He silenced them. “It is understandable. There are certain things that are expected of a king. For those who have been patient with me, thank you. First, I would like to announce that I have strengthened our relationship with the West, and over the coming weeks, we will see one thousand and five hundred Westerners join our clan.”
The room erupted in applause that it took Leo a few tries to calm everyone down. “My second announcement is one that I know many of you have been waiting for. As a part of rebuilding our relationship with the West, it was agreed that I would marry the daughter of King Agnor, Princess Victoria. The wedding will take place here, in three weeks’ time. You all will get a chance to meet her in a week’s time, when King Agnor and his children, reaches the North.”
I give up. I’m done. At this point I was plain pathetic. Loving a man who clearly didn’t love me. Everyone seemed happy about the news. I guess things were happening exactly how it was intended to be. A King marrying a Princess. And it was stupid to think I could I come between that. I ran out the hall, and I ran and I ran until I found myself on an old abandoned farm, with a broken heart and a ripped dress. Suddenly, I didn’t feel so pretty anymore.
Chapter Twelve
Dante
Why did she run away? Could it be that she has feelings for Leo? These recent discoveries bothered me more than it should. I could fuck any woman in this land. One woman should not be the source of my discomfort.
“Dante, you’ve been so quiet,” Madam Irvine said.
“I have already told my brother that I am happy for him.” There was a small dinner after the ceremony. My cousins, the council, Madam Irvine and Leo discuss wedding arrangements.
“It will be so beautiful,” Diana said.
“It will, if it is planned properly. Leave it up to me. I will take care of it all,” Madam Irvine said.
“But surely you would prefer a more modern wedding, do you not? These are things I know all about,” Diana said.
Look at them, competing over a wedding that meant nothing. It was only business.
“Both of you can plan it,” Leo said, “I value your wisdom, Madam Irvine, and I value your eye for style, Diana. I’m sure, with you two working together, it will be a spectacle to behold.”
Diana blushed. “You won’t be disappointed.”
“And you, brother. Do you wish to help with the arrangements?” he taunted me.
“I’ve never been interested in weddings. I might have to skip yours,” I said.
“You will no such thing!” Madam Irvine said. “He is your brother and you will be there for him.”
Leo and I laughed, getting under Madam Irvine skin was something we did best as a children. When I killed our mother at birth, it was Madam Irving who took care of us until we were teenagers. She fed us, nursed us, read us stories at night when Leo was afraid of the dark. While everyone was afraid of me and my black fur, she loved me with open arms. And while my brother grew to look more and more like my father, she treated me as an equal, disregarding the color of my hair or eyes.
“You will have to excuse me, I have other matters to attend to,” I said.
“Dante, you must find a wife yourself. A Lukas doesn’t go around sleeping with every beauty he sees. That tarnishes the name,” Madam Irvine tried to trap me in one of her lectures.
“Don’t worry. One day we will all be around this table planning my wedding.” I kissed her on the forehead then left.
I went to the roof tops. It was cooler and the city looked better at night. Lamp post glowing around the city like fire flies, owls flying about, and the moon is out, who listened to all a man has to say.
I saw her walking in the street, chatting to Ben and the whore. I wanted to approach her, but how? This was a riddle in itself. What would I say after so long? Maybe it was better off not saying anything. Leave her be. Her heart seemed to belong to Leo, anyways. I had a gift for her. A bow I had my men made from the finest wood, with our emblem and her name engraved. She was a fighter, honored with the badge of Hector, it was only right she had a weapon fit for such an achievement.
I had planned to leave the gift on her bed and go, for seeing her would only complicate things for me and for her. Did my brother know of her affection for him? And more importantly, did he return such affection?
I watched from the roof as a candle was lit in her room. She saw the bow on the bed then she looked out the window, looking for me. She admired it, I could tell she really liked it by the way she jumped on her bed. That was all I wanted. I disappeared into the night.
The next night I sat on the roof and watched her inside her room, for no other reason than to see her. Looking at women through windows wasn’t me, and yet, there I was, watching her brush her hair in the mirror in a pink night dress. Who am I? I shouldn’t be here.
As I turned my back to leave, I heard something whistling through the air, I turned just in time to catch an arrow heading straight for my face. Tied to the arrow was a note, which read; why hide?
She stood at her window with her bow in her hand. I leaped across and sat on her window frame.
“How many nights have you watched me?”
“Just the night before and this one,” I admitted.
“Why?”
“I could not bring myself to face you.”
“You ignored me then felt guilty about it. Do you think my emotion is something you can toy with? And then you give me a bow expecting everything be better.”
“I didn’t expect anything from it, other than for you to use it.”
“It’s beautiful. Thank you.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I don’t want your apology. I want to know why you ignored me for so long.”
“I was afraid.”
“Afraid of what, Dante? Do I scare you? Do I scare the big bad Dante?”
“Afraid of an emotion I don’t understand. I’ve never loved a woman before. I don’t even know my own mother.” I had said too much. I turned to jump from the window but she grabbed me and pulled me back.
There was empathy in her eyes, pitying me. A human, pitying me, the son of D
emetri Lukas. When did I stoop so low? She hugged me, an embrace I missed ever since I left for the West. It was warm as ever and sweeter than I could ever imagine. I prayed she would never let go.
“You don’t have to be afraid. There is nothing to fear in love.”
Then why was I still afraid? She would weaken me. I would always be vulnerable as long as I was in love. “The thought of you weakens me. Before, I would gladly fight, with no fear of dying. With you, I will fear death. I will fear dying and never seeing you again.”
“You fool,” she said. “Love doesn’t weaken you. It makes you stronger.”
I found that hard to believe. Maybe I had a lot to learn about love. If anyone was to teach me, I would rather it be her. “Would you care to join me on the roof top?”
“I’m in my night dress.”
“No one would see us.”
She thought about it then agreed.
“Hold on tight,” I told her, then leaped from the window with her on my back. I jumped from roof to roof until we were on the highest one, the grand library. Recently built. It was the last creation of my father. We overlooked the whole city. Just us and the moon watching over our heads.
“It’s so beautiful,” she said.
I watched her face smile with awe. “Yes, it is.”
“What do you like most about the North?” she asked.
“In the winter, when it snows on a full moon. It’s something I think I’ll remember until the day I die.”
She scoffed, “I hate the winter. I love the spring, when everything is anew, starting over. A rebirth you could say. It reminds me that it’s never too late to start over. To change into who I want to be.”
“And what do you want to be?”
“To be great.”
It was no coincidence that out of all the women that occupy this land, she would be the one I fall in love with. She understood. We both shared that common goal. This was destined by the Moon God himself.
“Ben opened my eyes on what was expected of me from now on. I will change what it means to be a woman. No more will anyone ever look at me as weak. I will show women that all the strength they need is already within them,” she said.
“So you want more women to go to war?”
“Not just war. I want women to be free do whatever they please. Just as how you might not understand love, so your hide from it. It is no different for women and their strength. They do not understand it, so they hide and ignore it. But if you show someone how to love, and show someone how to use their strength, then you have made that person stronger.”
“I admire the way you think.”
She turned to me, the moon shining beautifully in her eyes. “Teach how to fight in combat, how wield a knife, how to be better at using my bow.”
She was serious. The eyes don’t lie. “Tomorrow, at dawn, and every dawn after, we will train.”
She smiled.
We trained the next dawn, and the next, and the next, and even in those few short days I saw glimpses of what she could become. She was becoming better with the bow. It came natural to her, as if she could whisper to the arrow and the arrow listened. Her combat was the weakest but she was determined to overcome her shortcomings. She knew pain and a lot of it. She must learn to accept it, then she will understand how to make peace with it. I did not go easy on her, not for a moment, even when my chest tightened for hurting the woman I love. I believed in her and her strength, and she would have to learn everything that hard way.
The rain poured in the dawn, and still she was up and ready, even when I would have rather rest in cool slumber. We fought in the rain and I slammed her into the mud, repeatedly, and every time she would get back up. She spat blood as if it was water, and even when I gave in and advised her to stop, she continued. Never did I question her will again.
After being impressed, I invited her in the Lukas castle, to take a warm bath. We were both soaking wet and I think I even had mud in my ear.
If you asked a man, who was the beautiful woman he had ever seen, I doubt ‘a naked woman covered in mud’ would be his answer. I was mesmerized, obviously too. She smirked at the growth of my beast.
“It seems you’re excited,” she teased.
She made a soft moan as the warm water touched her body. “Yes. This is exactly what I needed.” She closed her eyes, rubbed her breast then wet her hair, and I watched while trying to contain myself.
“You are improving.”
“And I will keep improving,” she said with complete confidence. She raised her legs above the surface of the water, rubbing her hand over her bruises.
“There will be more bruises to come.”
“And they too will heal. I don’t care for having pretty legs. I just need them to work.”
I laughed. “That’s too bad, I like pretty legs on a woman.”
“Then find a woman with pretty legs. Simple.” She leaned back, admiring the paintings on the ceiling. Her nipples peaked out the water.
Temptation is a powerful force, and more powerful is a man who could overcome it, however, I was not that man. I took her nipple in my mouth. Her hand pulled my head in, forcing me to suck harder.
I bit and she moaned, whispering my name, serenading me. Her legs part for me to enter. She whispered again, “I want you inside—”
“Brother, I need your advice” Leo walked in the bath house, giving us a split second to separate ourselves. He stopped, looked at Elizabeth, who was naked in my bath house, then looked at me with confusion. A short silence which felt like a lifetime. “I’m sorry, I should have knocked.” He turned and walked out the door.
Elizabeth placed her hands over her face. “What have I done?” she said. She got out the bath and got dressed in her dirty clothes.
“I can servants bring fresh clothes.”
“No, it’s fine.” She walked to the door then stopped. “See you at dawn,” then left.
Leo was always the favorite in everything. He had it all. Why couldn’t he let me have this? Do I not deserve anything in this life?
In the space of a day, I took two step forward and three step back.
Chapter Thirteen
Leo
How could he? He must have known my affection for Elizabeth. Was this an attempt to spit on me? Dante didn’t care for love or courtship. He only wanted her for sex because he knew he could get into my head, and it worked. Bravo Dante. And what exactly will you get from this? Why do you find pleasure in my misery? What have I ever done to you?
All I ever did was love you.
I didn’t choose this life, my name, my eyes, and the color of my hair. All of it was given to me. Then why should I be blamed for something I had no control of? What sense does it make?
How could I trust a man that smile in my demise? What use does he have at my side? Blood or no blood, I must rid myself from him, for he will one day be my downfall.
Rain beat on the roofs, lightning flashed and thunders rolled. The darkness covered the North and it was barely noon. Madam Irvine said the Gods were angry for some reason. How should I know what the Golds feel? I barely understood my own feelings.
Madam Irvine didn’t understand the concept of someone wanting solitude, so she followed me to balcony, and did nothing but stood and watched.
Is this what the rest of my life will look like? Watching the woman I love fall for other men while I marry a woman I cared so little for. Everyone was so happy for my wedding except me. Madam Irvine could not wait to meet her, while I loathed the day of her arrival.
I wanted a child, as do any man, but not with her, not with Victoria. I hardly knew her and I didn’t have to, for I already who I wanted to marry and bear my child.
“Deal with it,” Madam Irvine said, as if she knew what I was thinking.
“Deal with what?”
“With whatever that is bothering you. Deal with it, get it out the way, before your wedding.”
“Your Grace, Elizabeth is standing outside your door,” m
y guard said.
“Will you excuse me?” I told Madam Irvine.
“No, I’ll go. Just remember what I said.”
Elizabeth smiled as she was escorted to my balcony. Something I certainly was not expecting.
“Elizabeth,” I returned the smile. I knew what I did. I knew that I must have hurt her, but I did it for her own good.
“I had been meaning to speak with you. It was unfortunate that you saw what you saw earlier,” she said.
There were cuts on her face. “Did Dante do this to you?” I gently touched her cheek.
“Yes—”
“I’m going to kill him.”
“It’s just training.”
“He’s training you?”
“Yes, and it’s the same reason why I’m here. But first, let’s get what happened earlier out the way.”
“Out of all the men in the North, why my brother? That’s what confuses me. Was it because I hurt you?”
“It started way before you headed off West or when I found out you were getting married. It wasn’t out of spite. I would never do that.”
“You fell for the both of us?”
“Yes.”
“You know the type of man he is, right? He’ll use you then discard of you.”
“Oh yeah? Like how you left me?”
“I didn’t know how to tell you I was getting married.”
She shook her head. “That’s the thing you two have in common. You both are clueless when it comes a woman.”
“I was wrong. I love you, Elizabeth. That will never change.”
“Did you think of my love when you decided to get married?”
“I had no choice.”
“We all have a choice, Leo.”
“What I did, I did for you, and all my people. I accepted that you may hate me, but at least you would be safe. That’s what I thought about when I accepted to marry her.”
