Brad’s heart squeezed. He didn’t want to think about that. Couldn’t bear to face the knife-sharp grief again.
Briefly, he wondered if he’d made the right decision, taking Ian as his omega. Promising Ian so much, when he’d screwed up before. Lives had been lost. What if it was Ian’s? Or their baby’s?
“What’s wrong?” Ian asked, turning to face him.
Brad shrugged. “Am I the right alpha for you?”
Ian gave a lopsided smile. “Am I the right omega for you?”
“Yeah, you are.” Brad pulled Ian snug against himself, breathing in the faint scent of sweat on Ian’s skin. “If anything goes wrong... I want you by my side, okay? I want you to remember that.”
“Why does that sound so terrible?” Ian frowned.
“Dunno. I just want to have you forever.”
Brad kissed Ian’s shoulder, turning him around. Couldn’t help dragging his wrists over Ian’s arms, his chest, marking all of Ian as his.
He might not have been the best alpha for Ian, as naive as he was. But Ian was everything he wanted, and Brad was going to try his best, so he could be an alpha worthy of his omega.
21
Brad
“How come you’re sleeping in the same room as Daddy?” Gwen asked, poking her head out of her bedroom.
Brad paused in the hallway, rubbing his eyes. Not what he expected to hear first thing in the morning. “’Cuz we’re dating. How’re you feeling?”
“Good.” Gwen looked curiously at him. “Will I date someone too? When I grow up.”
Brad shut the door quietly so Ian could sleep in peace. Ian would probably squirm at Gwen’s questions, with the direction they were taking. “If you want. You don’t have to date anyone. But if you do, make sure it’s someone good.”
Gwen squinted. “How do you tell if they’re good?”
“You bring them to me, I’ll tell you.” Brad stifled a yawn. “Want some breakfast? I’m making eggs for your dad.”
“I want eggs too!” Gwen wriggled, following Brad to the kitchen.
She was doing a lot better after the surgery. Brad had been worried at first, knowing what the surgeon had done with her heart. But Gwen had been recovering quickly, better than the estimate Fenway had given them.
Ian had been relieved. Gwen had told him she was stronger than he thought.
In some ways, Brad thought maybe she was right.
He set the pan on the stove, pulling the egg carton from the fridge. Gwen perched on the wooden stool she’d claimed for herself, peering at the olive oil Brad drizzled into the pan.
“But I don’t want to kiss anyone, that’s weird,” Gwen said. “Or the sex thing. That’s weird, too.”
Brad snorted. “Then you don’t have to. There’s all kinds of people in the world. Some people have relationships without kissing, or sex.”
Gwen cocked her head. “You can do that?”
“Yup.” Brad turned up the heat on the stove, swirling the oil around the pan. “Relationships aren’t always about the kissing. People do fun things with each other, too, like they go on picnics, or they watch movies together. For some people, having a partner is about finding someone you can be best friends with.”
“But it’s not like you or Daddy. You do the kissing thing.”
“We do.”
Brad cracked some eggs into the pan, then set the kettle on the stove. Poured out a glass of almond milk for Gwen.
“But that’s for your dad and me, though. You’ll know what you want when you grow up.”
“Daddy says I’ll be an alpha.”
Brad chuckled. Gwen was pretty bossy. “He might be right.”
“Will my omega be a girl like me?”
“Who knows? They could be anything. Maybe they could be a boy, or girl, or maybe they could be somewhere between a boy and a girl. ‘Slong as you’re happy with them. Us alphas, we do our best to protect the people we love. You understand that?”
“Uh-huh.”
She leaned forward on her chair. Then she hopped off, padding out of the kitchen. Moments later, Gwen returned with her sketchbook and some crayons, and began to draw.
“What’re you drawing?” Brad asked, flipping the sizzling eggs.
“I’m drawing us!” Gwen beamed, tracing out three circles on the paper—two high, one low. Then she filled in their stick figure bodies—two adults and a child, all of them holding hands. “That’s you, that’s me, and that’s Daddy. When I grow up, I’ll protect you, too.”
Brad’s heart warmed. I’m part of your family, huh? “When your dad wakes, show him that. He’ll be so pleased.”
Gwen beamed, kicking her legs. She’d been living with him and Ian for almost two months, and Brad was still amazed every day, that he had his omega and daughter with him. Felt too good to be true.
He plated an egg for Gwen, pulling out a slice of bread from the toaster. “Anything else?”
Gwen shook her head. Brad ruffled her hair, turning when his phone buzzed on the counter.
He had thought it might be Ian texting him just because. It wasn’t his omega, though.
On the screen, there was a message from his dad. I’m hearing rumors that you were seen in the college with Ian McMillan. Is it true?
Brad swore inwardly, his heart sinking. How had Dad found out? Was it Sue? Or had she told her friends, and someone let it slip?
He thought about Ian teaching in the college, Ian’s face when he opened the bills in the mail. Ever since Brad started sneaking away Ian’s bills to pay them, his bank total had been dropping steadily. Ian hadn’t asked how much money Brad possessed, but Brad had been watching the money he’d accumulated bleeding away.
They still had debts, especially after Gwen’s latest visit to the hospital. It would take them at least a couple years to pay off everything, probably more.
What if I run out of money to help Ian? Brad didn’t want to think about it. He’d made a lump-sum payment last month, and taken fifty grand off Ian’s bills.
His bank account had suffered. Ian had looked at his bill in amazement, and it had been worth it to see his joy.
Brad couldn’t do more of that, though. He had just about fifteen grand left, and after the next payment, they’d probably be scrimping when they could.
Wish I was better than this. Wish I had more to help Ian with.
He was alpha, wasn’t he? He should be doing better than he was. Brad glanced around his house, wondering how much money he could’ve saved if he hadn’t spent it on the kitchen, and the living room, and everything. His heart sank.
Then, his phone buzzed.
I’m looking into McMillan’s tenure. It shouldn’t be difficult to remove his status.
That made Brad’s blood run cold.
I have nothing to do with him, Brad texted back. You’re better off letting him do his job.
He isn’t spectacular at that, either, Harold Saxon answered.
Brad closed his eyes, listening to Gwen’s fork clinking on her plate. It wasn’t Ian’s fault that he had been missing classes—Gwen’s health was more important.
When Harold stopped with the texts, Brad set his phone face-down on the counter, pulling out a chair across from Gwen. He didn’t have the power to influence his father’s decisions. Didn’t know how he could improve Ian’s standing with the chemistry department.
“Tell me something about Daddy that I don’t know,” Brad said.
Gwen looked thoughtfully at him. “Daddy likes chocolate cake.”
Brad laughed. That wasn’t what he’d been expecting, but he’d take it. The next time he was out shopping... maybe he’d get Ian a slice of cake.
“What’s your favorite place that you’ve visited with him?”
“The playground!” Gwen wriggled in her seat. “There’s one near the old apartment, it had swings and hippo slides. With water!”
“She means the water park,” Ian said, stepping into the kitchen.
Brad’s heart skipped. Ian’s awake.
/> Ian looked sleepy, his hair mussed, but his lips were curved in a smile. He was wearing a loose shirt, one that clung to his narrow shoulders and flowed around the bump of his belly.
At eighteen weeks, they couldn’t hug without Ian’s belly shoving against Brad’s hips. Brad reached out, and Ian stepped into his arms.
“Morning, Daddy!” Gwen said.
Brad glanced at her. “You know, if you’re calling both of us Daddy... it could get confusing.”
“Morning, hon.” Ian laughed, sliding his fingers through Brad’s hair. “Do you want to pick another name, Brad? Since I’m still Daddy.”
“You’re the best dad,” Brad murmured, kissing the bump of Ian’s belly. Ian blushed. Brad stuck his nose into Ian’s belly button, breathing in. “What about Papa? Does Papa sound better, Gwen?”
She tilted her head. “I think so.”
“So from today onward, you’ll call me Papa,” Brad said.
“Papa.” Gwen tried the name on her tongue, looking thoughtful. Brad’s heart swelled.
“There you go,” Ian murmured. “It’ll probably be less confusing that way.”
“With the new one, too.” Brad kissed Ian’s belly. Met Ian’s eyes, and looked sideways, at Gwen. “You gonna tell?”
Ian bit his lip. They were still two weeks from the ultrasound. Until then, neither of them could tell if this new baby would be fine. It made Brad kind of nervous.
“Your belly’s big,” Gwen said, peering at them.
Ian exchanged an uncertain look with Brad.
“Go ahead,” Brad murmured. “I’m here.”
Ian wet his lips, squeezing Brad’s hand. “I’m pregnant with your baby brother, hon.”
Gwen stared at Ian’s belly. “Oh.”
“Do you want to touch him?” Ian asked.
Gwen hopped off her stool, padding over. With some trepidation, she poked at Ian’s belly. “It’s squishy.”
“He’s hidden inside,” Ian said, stroking her hair. “And he’ll be very helpless when he’s born. Will you keep an eye out for him? He’ll need all the help he can get.”
Gwen puffed her chest out. “Yeah, I’ll protect him. I’ll be an alpha!”
Brad grinned, and Ian cracked a smile. “Thank you,” Ian said. “And your Da—Papa and I will be so proud of you.”
Brad scooped Ian against him, kissing his belly.
“Will he have a heart defect like me, too?” Gwen asked.
It was an innocent question. Perfectly valid. But Ian froze against Brad, and Brad could already hear Ian’s mind totaling up the next bill. He wasn’t sure he could afford another child like that, himself.
Could he promise himself to Ian, knowing he couldn’t get Ian out of debt? But two parents were better than one, right?
Brad shoved away his worries, rubbing Ian’s back.
“He’ll probably be fine,” Brad said. “Maybe he won’t have a defect at all.”
Gwen nodded. She grabbed a crayon, and when Ian made a soft, surprised sound, Brad looked up.
He found four stick figures on Gwen’s drawing this time—there was a smaller child holding on to Ian’s other hand. A baby boy.
“Oh, Gwen,” Ian said, his voice strangled.
“That’s our family,” Gwen said proudly. “All of us!”
Brad stood. He scooped Ian close to himself, caught Gwen’s hand and tugged her off her stool. Then he danced slowly with his family in the kitchen, all four of them, Ian and Gwen with matching smiles on their faces.
They weren’t perfect, but to Brad, they were the best thing in the world.
22
Ian
Ian pushed open the door to Olivier’s strings, holding his breath. He’d never been here before. It felt a little awkward when the bells on the door jingled, announcing his arrival.
“Morning.” An omega waved cheerfully behind the glass counter. “I’m Olivier—give a yell if you need help.”
“Thanks,” Ian said, waving back.
He eased into the store, feeling lost. Musical instruments were unfamiliar to him; he’d been putting off this trip, afraid of buying the wrong thing.
Worse, Brad had probably forgotten that Ian wanted to buy the strings for him—it had been a month since that day, and Ian’s guilt increased with each time Brad tuned his violin.
The shop smelled like wood and polish, and faintly, the carnation scent of an omega. To one side, acoustic guitars perched on the corkboard walls, their polished bodies mellow and shapely. In front of them, electric guitars sat on metal racks, a variety of bold colors and gleaming surfaces.
On the other side of the store, violins and violas were displayed in glass cases—smaller versions of the guitars, but just as pricey. At least, that was how Ian thought of them.
He hadn’t the slightest idea why someone would choose to play a viola over a violin, but Brad could probably explain that.
Ian wandered over, wincing at the price tags on the violins. Counted himself lucky that Brad didn’t need a third instrument. Ian couldn’t afford it.
He stepped around the violin cases, searching for violin strings.
“You look like you could use some help,” Olivier said, emerging from behind the counter.
Ian smiled wryly. “I guess I could.”
Two weeks ago, he’d snapped pictures of Brad’s violins while Brad had been on firefighting duty. Ian had peeked into Brad’s desk drawer, but there had been no spare strings there.
Then Ian had searched online, and the variety of string materials and thicknesses had been so wide that Ian had backed away, overwhelmed.
So here he was at the store, pulling out his phone, feeling a little embarrassed.
“I’m looking for some violin strings,” Ian said, unlocking his phone.
The wallpaper on his phone was the photo Harris had taken at the station—Gwen with her plastic firefighter helmet, Ian and Brad by her side.
The photo always made Ian pause; Gwen had recovered from her surgery fine, but Ian still remembered the horror of that day, the sight of his daughter in the hospital bed, tubes and machines around her. And then it made him glad, because he still had Gwen and Brad with him.
“Oh! Is that Brad?” Olivier peered at Ian’s phone. Then he leaned back, smiling sheepishly. “Sorry, I was prying. Please ignore that.”
Ian laughed. “As a matter of fact, yes. I’m looking for strings for Brad. He mentioned that he shops here often, so... I was hoping you’d have an idea what he needs.”
“Would that be for his Stradizine, or the Glossamer?”
Ian looked blankly at Olivier. “Sorry... what?”
Olivier beamed. “If I remember correctly, Brad has two violins. The acoustic one is the Glossamer, and the electric violin is the Stradizine.”
Ian stared. He felt a little inadequate; he didn’t even know much about Brad’s most precious instruments. And Brad certainly loved his violins, cleaning and tuning them when he got a chance between Ian and Gwen and his firefighting. Ian didn’t even know they had names.
Gods, Ian had been so focused on himself, hadn’t he? I should be doing better.
Olivier rubbed his neck self-consciously. “My apologies—that’s a quirk of mine. I remember most of my customers’ instruments. Swear I’m not some strange stalker!”
Ian hadn’t looked at Olivier closely, but he did now.
The shop owner was a small omega, slightly shorter than Ian, with green eyes and floppy dark hair. He had to be in his late twenties, dressed in a button-down shirt and black jeans. He was thin. And going by the shadow in his eyes... he looked kind of lonely, too.
“I didn’t know Brad had a family.” Olivier smiled wistfully, glancing at Ian’s phone. “Your daughter is beautiful.”
“Thanks.”
Ian stood there, cradling his phone. He didn’t know what else to say. Had Olivier been interested in Brad? Or did he just want a family to call his own?
Feeling possessive, Ian opened the photo gallery on
his phone. “Brad needs strings for the electric violin—it’s the one he plays most often.”
“Ah.” Olivier turned them down an aisle, stopping by stacks of white cardboard boxes. “That’ll be the single-filament steel core strings. Did you need the full set?”
Ian bit his lip. Brad hadn’t mentioned it, and Ian had inspected all the strings on his violins—none of them seemed to be in bad shape. “How much does a full set cost?”
“That’ll be $61.87.” Oliver picked out a box from the stacks, opening it to show Ian the four rolled-up strings inside.
Ian held his breath. That was a lot of money. He could buy a week’s worth of groceries with that, and maybe even have change left over.
But it would seem so cheap, and ungrateful, if he only bought one string. What if it was the wrong one? What if Brad needed more?
“I’ll take that,” Ian said, breathing out.
He followed Olivier through the store, wondering about Olivier’s customers. What sort of person had money to spend on all these instruments? How often had Brad visited this place? Had he ever been interested in Olivier?
Envy crawled up Ian’s throat. He couldn’t help looking at Olivier’s face—no crow’s feet, no gray hair. Probably no scars on his skin, either.
Ian flipped through his worn wallet, feeling a twinge when Olivier rang up the total at the cash register.
“I’ll ring up your purchase with Brad’s store loyalty card—is that okay?” Olivier paused. “You get a ten percent discount with the card.”
Ian’s stomach flipped. Sharing Brad’s store card? That sounded... binding. Like he and Brad were already married. “Will he be notified of the purchase?”
Olivier shook his head. “Not unless you tell him.”
Ian breathed a sigh. Ten percent was still savings—he could get so many things for Gwen with six dollars. “Please use Brad’s store card—I’d really appreciate that.”
“Doing it now.” Olivier tapped into the register, and the discount went through.
Ian sagged. Brad was worth the fifty-five dollars. It was just... difficult to justify, when they still hadn’t paid off the bills from Gwen’s surgery. And the debt still weighed on Ian’s shoulders.
Omega Teacher’s Secret Page 24
