Brad tucked his phone away, then pressed Ian down against the bed, kissing his bondmate. Ian groaned against him, squirming. It always made Brad’s instincts roar, whenever his omega begged for touch. Brad growled, dragging his wrist down Ian’s belly. “There, does that convince you?”
Ian grinned wider. “It does.”
Brad tangled their fingers together. Touched the ring he’d slipped onto Ian’s finger. Ian had said yes. They were going to get married, and that made his heart soar all over again.
“When do you want the wedding to be?” Brad murmured.
Ian laughed. “We’ll talk about it after Xavier gets here. I mean, we’re not getting married right now.”
“Imagine if we did, though.” Brad grinned. “Have a minister come into the room just as you’re giving birth to Xavier. We’ll make it the messiest wedding ever.”
Ian shoved at him. “I don’t think the minister will want to see all that blood.”
“Unless he’s a vampire,” Brad said. “You know, like how they say there’s vampires in San Luis Obispo. Remember the rumor about some guy whose blood all the vampires want?”
Ian coughed. “That’s from a storybook, Brad.”
“So you say.” Brad wriggled his eyebrows. “What if they’re real?”
“No, they aren’t.”
“Fine.” Brad kissed Ian on the lips, releasing him. “C’mon, let’s tell Gwen.”
He helped Ian off the bed, holding him close as Ian waddled to the next bedroom. Brad knocked. “Gwen, can we come in for a moment?”
“Uh-huh!”
When they peeked in, Gwen was on her bed, reading one of Brad’s books from his childhood.
“Hey, hon,” Ian said, waddling in first. “It looks like Xavier’s on his way out into the world. Your papa and I are going to the hospital, so be good, all right? Levi will be here if you need anything.”
Gwen stared at Ian’s belly. “How is Xavier going to come out of your belly? Is it... going to burst?”
“Hell no,” Brad said before he could stop himself. The mental image sent his skin crawling.
Ian paused. “We’ll see. If things are bad, the doctor might have to do a surgery.”
Gwen made a face. “That sounds painful.”
“It will be.”
Ian sat on Gwen’s bed, and Brad watched as Ian hugged her close.
“Your papa and I will be very busy with Xavier over the next few months. But I want you to know that we’ll love you just as much, okay?”
Gwen blinked at him. “Okay.”
Brad joined them, dropping a kiss on Ian’s head. Then Ian gasped, hunching over again.
“Daddy,” Gwen cried.
Brad wrapped himself around Ian, rubbing his back. Ian gritted his teeth, his breathing labored. It was another contraction, and Brad wanted him in the hospital, just so there would be doctors who knew what to do if something went wrong.
He waited until Ian relaxed, rubbing Ian’s back. “You okay?”
Ian blew out a breath. “Yeah. We’ll have to be leaving soon.”
“Like, right now.” Brad leaped to his feet when the doorbell rang. “I’ll get it.”
He all but ran through the house, flinging open the front door. Levi had a bag with him, looking disheveled, his glasses askew.
“Hey,” Brad said. “Thanks for coming. Ian and I are just about to head out.”
Levi nodded. “I hope it goes well.”
“Same here.”
Brad hurried back into Gwen’s room. Ian was on his feet, and Brad walked him out into the living room, touching the small of his back. Levi looked warily at Ian’s belly. Brad kind of felt the same.
He grabbed the overnight bag, then brought Ian to the car, helping him into the passenger seat.
“I’m fine,” Ian muttered. “I can do this myself.”
Brad wanted him to be safe, though. He made sure Ian was strapped in comfortably, then hopped into his seat, backing the car out into the street.
When he began to drive, Brad blurted, “If—if anything happens, just remember that I love you, okay?”
Ian looked sidelong at him. “What do you mean?”
Brad swallowed hard. He couldn’t say it. Time and again, he’d thought, I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you. But he didn’t want Ian to worry, didn’t want to remind Ian of his age. Except Ian’s age was still something Brad remembered every day.
“I’m afraid of losing you,” Brad said, his breath stuck in his throat. “I just—I just think about it all the time.”
Ian opened his mouth, pausing. Then he looked down at his belly, smoothing his hand over it. “I’m sorry for the burden.”
“No, that’s fine,” Brad hurried to say. “I just… I want a thousand years with you, you know? Or… or fifty. That’d be nice.”
Ian smiled, his cheeks growing dark. “Same here. I just figure I’ll cope better if I lived every day like my last. I’m savoring every day with you. Every moment I see your face, or hear your voice. If I die—”
“Don’t say that,” Brad croaked.
Ian looked steadily at him. “It’s a fact of life, Brad.” He squeezed Brad’s hand. “It has to happen at some point. That’s the way everything goes.”
Brad regretted even starting this conversation. “I don’t want to hear it.”
“If I die,” Ian repeated, “then I want you to remember that you’re the best thing that ever happened in my life. The same with Gwen. I’m never going to stop loving you. And I know that you love me, too. And I’ll forgive any mistakes you ever make. Remember that.”
Brad choked up, and they had to pull over so he could wipe his eyes dry.
When they began driving again, Ian had a couple more contractions in the car. Despite what Ian had said, it made Brad panic again. He wasn’t ready to lose Ian. He’d never be ready.
They got to the hospital in record time. Ian was hunched over and hugging his belly when they pulled into the parking lot. Brad hated that he was only able to hold Ian’s hand during the drive.
The receptionist at the emergency room checked them in. Then they waited, and a doctor examined Ian. After more waiting, a nurse wheeled Ian to the labor ward. Brad held Ian’s hand the whole time, watching Ian’s face.
Now that Ian was in the hospital, Brad could relax a little. They had a babysitter watching Gwen. They were prepared for the stay.
Even then, Brad’s nerves frazzled when he helped Ian into the hospital gown. He glimpsed the nurse staring at Ian’s scars, but said nothing. Just caught Ian’s nape, tipped his face up, and kissed him. Ian blushed.
He was beautiful, and Brad prayed to every single god there was when Ian cried out, pressing his arm around his belly.
“How long is it gonna be?” Brad murmured, climbing into the hospital bed behind Ian, just holding him.
“It might be a while.” Ian panted, gritting his teeth.
The contractions were coming faster now. Brad had lost track of how long they had spent waiting in the emergency room, and then the labor ward.
All he knew was that Ian’s contractions faded enough to let him relax somewhat, and then they wracked through him all over again.
Brad wished he could take that pain for his omega, so Ian wouldn’t have to go through this at all.
“You’re so damn brave,” Brad murmured, stroking Ian’s hair when he clenched his jaw. “Xavier will be here soon, and then you’ll get to rest. I’ll take over.”
Ian smile wanly, turning to bury his face in Brad’s chest. The next contraction rolled through him, and Brad closed his eyes, murmuring into Ian’s ear, stroking his back.
When the midwife came in, she shooed Brad off the bed. She was an older omega with graying hair and a kindly smile. Brad watched as she took Ian’s pulse and blood pressure, then measured Xavier’s pulse with a fetal heart monitor.
“Is his heart okay?” Ian asked, his voice tight.
The midwife smiled. “He seems to be.”
&n
bsp; Brad relaxed slightly, watching as Ian continued to worry, his face pinched. That made Brad worry, too.
The midwife pulled on a glove and set Ian’s feet apart, flat on the bed. Then she slipped two fingers into Ian. Brad growled, possessive. Mine.
She clucked her tongue at him. “You’re a couple inches dilated, hon. Not long, now.”
The midwife left them soon after. Brad climbed back into bed with Ian, and Ian squirmed. “She might come chase you back off,” Ian said anxiously.
“I don’t care.” Brad kissed the tip of Ian’s nose, brushing Ian’s sweat-damp hair from his face. “I’m staying with you through the whole birth this time.”
Ian’s face lit up with joy, and it made Brad’s heart skip.
The next few hours passed slowly. Brad read a children’s book to Ian and Xavier, and Ian hummed between his contractions.
Then the contractions grew more frequent, a couple minutes between every one. When Ian panted with pain, Brad’s fear returned.
“Push when she tells you,” Brad murmured, holding Ian’s hand when Ian cried out.
“I’m pushing!” Ian panted.
He heaved. Brad held his omega, watching his face, hoping it went okay, hoping none of the scary shit would happen, like placenta abruption or a wall rupture. Ian was at risk for that.
At any time... Brad could lose his omega.
Brad had a few people die in his arms on the job, and he knew how fragile lives could be. Couldn’t bear to think about Ian gone, just like that.
“You’re doing great,” Brad croaked. Winced when Ian squeezed his hand so tight, it felt like his knuckles were grinding together.
“Hurts,” Ian hissed.
Brad dropped kisses on Ian’s face, smelling sweat and rose and honey. His omega. His most precious person.
Ian heaved again. When he bared his teeth, Brad said, “We won’t have any more after this. I’m not gonna put you through this again.”
“We damn well won’t,” Ian snapped, the tendons on his neck straining. “Or you’ll find yourself missing balls, Brad Saxon.”
Brad grimaced, his balls shrinking toward his body. Yeah, maybe two children was the perfect number.
“He’s crowning,” the midwife said. “Just a little more, hon. Now, push!”
Ian pushed, his nails biting into Brad’s arm. He heaved, and heaved, and Brad held his breath, his heart pounding so hard he couldn’t think. Just wanted Ian to come out of this safe. And Xavier, too.
Then a bloody mess slid out of Ian, and the midwife caught the baby, cleaning him up with a towel. Brad looked to Ian first. Ian sank back into the pillows, his hair matted with sweat, his chest heaving from the exertion.
He was alive, he was fine, and Brad swallowed hard, his eyes burning.
Brad scooped Ian into his arms, dropping kisses on Ian’s face. He pressed his cheek against Ian’s. Just so he could touch his omega, make sure Ian was truly here with him.
“You’re the best,” Brad whispered. “And the bravest, and I love you.”
Ian smiled tiredly, nuzzling against Brad. “Love you, too.”
Feet away, Xavier began to wail. Brad and Ian looked up; Ian broke into a wider smile.
The midwife stepped up to them, setting a dried-off Xavier carefully on Ian’s chest.
“His heartbeat is normal,” she said. Brad couldn’t help the overwhelming relief that soaked into his bones. Ian sighed, relief flickering through his eyes, too.
Xavier wailed, his tiny fists clenched, his eyes squeezed shut.
“Hello, Xavier,” Ian murmured, hugging him close. “Your Papa and I are so happy to finally meet you.”
Brad’s throat tightened. He leaned in, kissing Xavier gently. “Hey, Xavier. Listen to your dad. He’s the boss.”
Ian chuckled. Xavier quietened, as though he was listening to Ian’s voice. So Ian murmured to him, rocking their baby. Brad couldn’t help the overwhelming relief that washed through his chest.
His omega really was fine. Ian was alive, Xavier was healthy, and back home, Gwen was probably asleep in bed, safe.
This wasn’t the future Brad had anticipated for himself. He hadn’t thought he would, with the way he was so much younger than Ian, and with how lives had been lost at his hands.
But Ian had seen past all of that. He’d accepted Brad into his life, and he’d given Brad a purpose again. They were both healing. With Ian, Gwen, and now Xavier, it felt as though Brad’s life was finally complete.
“Mine,” Brad murmured, pulling Ian and Xavier against himself.
“Yours,” Ian said, his eyes warm and bright with love.
Brad held them, and his heart soared.
Epilogue
Six months later
The wedding took place on a February morning, with the wintry breeze swirling around the bare tree branches, and mallards quacking on the lake nearby. This early on a Saturday, the park was quiet, peaceful—perfect for a ceremony by the park’s tiny white gazebo.
Brad stood before a gathering of their friends and family, his heart pattering. They’d invited forty guests—mostly the off-duty personnel from the fire station, and a few of Ian’s ex-colleagues. Then there were their friends, too.
Harris and Valen chased after their son; Landon had gone running off with a rose bouquet from the rows of white chairs. Their omega, Sam, laughed, their toddler by his feet, their infant in his arms.
The other firefighters sat behind Sam, nudging each other, grinning when Landon threw the rose bouquet at Harris. Harris scooped up Landon, presenting the bouquet to Valen.
Valen grinned and linked their arms. Together, they strode together to Sam, kneeling before him.
Brad chuckled when Valen handed the bouquet back to Landon, who gave it to his omega dad.
On the other side of the aisle, there were a few of Ian’s friends. June’s wife, Cher, was a bubbly omega with orange hair. She sat in the front row with Gwen, holding a toddler in her arms.
Ian had dressed both Gwen and Xavier—Gwen wore a denim jumper with a plaid shirt. Xavier squirmed in her arms, dressed in an adorable rabbit outfit.
Gwen looks like a farmer who’s just caught a rabbit, doesn’t she? Ian had said this morning. Brad had rolled his eyes.
It wasn’t the most appropriate, but it was their wedding. And Brad wanted anything that would make Ian smile.
He glanced past Ian’s other friends—Dale from the childcare center, with his alpha, Greg. They had a boy with them, maybe five years old. Greg was braiding Dale’s hair, and Dale was singing a song to their son.
Brad had heard that Dale had been Ian’s colleague back at the college, and he’d married his student, too.
Funny how the world worked, Brad finding another couple who had been through the same things he and Ian did.
The rest of Ian’s colleagues sat with Greg and Dale, omegas with friendly eyes and cheerful smiles. Then there was Olivier, too, and Levi. Behind them, past the rows of seats, Ian waited with June.
Brad’s heart skipped when their eyes met.
There wasn’t much distance between them, maybe ten yards. But when Ian smiled, the rest of the world faded away, and Brad’s heart thumped for his omega.
After Xavier’s birth, Ian had been recovering slowly. They’d taken turns caring for their baby, Brad sleeping in the same bed as their son when he was off-duty. On the days they both worked, Levi came in, and helped care for Xavier.
Today, though, neither of them were working. Ian had picked out Brad’s suit, and then he’d picked out his own button-down shirt. Ian had lost some of the weight he’d gained during the pregnancy, but not all. That was fine, though. Brad didn’t mind.
Brad gulped when the minister cleared his throat.
“Are we ready for the ceremony?” the portly beta asked.
Ian nodded at Brad, and Brad’s pulse raced. “Yeah, we are.”
“Very well.”
The minister waved for the organist in the gazebo to begin. Then the musi
c played, a song Brad had written for Ian. It soared high and sweet into the air, and June held out her arm, waiting for Ian to take it.
Together, they walked down the petal-strewn aisle. Brad forgot to breathe when Ian stepped toward him, his clothes clinging to his body, his eyes sparkling.
Ian was already his. But this? The ceremony made everything official. Everyone here knew that Brad was taking this omega to be his husband. They would sign a certificate later, and there was nothing else that could take Ian away from Brad.
Brad held his breath when Ian stopped before him. June handed him over; Ian’s palm was warm and sweaty against Brad’s fingers. And now Brad couldn’t tear his eyes off Ian’s shy smile, and the blush on his cheeks.
“You’re so damn beautiful,” Brad murmured.
Ian squeezed his hand, his smile growing wider. “So are you.”
“We’re all congregated here today to witness the marriage of Brad Saxon and Ian McMillan,” the minister boomed. “Brad and Ian, join your hands.”
They faced each other, Ian slipping his fingers into Brad’s hands. The minister gave a speech. Brad hardly heard any of it. Difficult to, when he had the most beautiful omega in front of him. Ian, with his wispy hair, his sea-blue eyes, his rose scent all over Brad’s skin.
They’d woken up together this morning, and Brad had stood Ian in front of the mirror.
I am worthy, Ian had said. There had been a smile on his face.
He was starting to believe it—that was good.
It would take a while to fully undo the damage Ian’s mother had inflicted on him. Brad knew they could, though. Yvette McMillan wasn’t here today; she’d turned down the wedding invitation. Brad was secretly pleased.
His father wasn’t here, either. That was fine, too. Brad had begun a new life with Ian, and the less negativity they came into contact with, the better.
Why hate, when you could fill your heart with love?
“Brad,” the minister began. “Do you take this omega, Ian McMillan, to be your lawful husband?”
“I do,” Brad said. Didn’t have to think about it. Ian’s blush deepened.
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