“You can develop your gifts on your own—in your own time. You don’t need to learn anything from him. And the proof is that you’re already more powerful than they ever expected.”
I take off my riding helmet and toss it on the chair. “Kyon said I could ask him anything and he’ll give me a straight answer. I have to find out what the Narc meant when he said that I’m the prophecy,” I rub my chin.
“No,” Trey says sternly.
“No? Why not?”
“Because Kyon is dangerous,” Trey replies, like I’m a child.
“Well, so am I,” I say, lifting my chin a notch. “I can handle Kyon.”
“Handle him…did you say handle him?” Trey asks rhetorically. “You’re no stronger than a kitten. How are you going to handle him?”
“Uhh,” I mumble as Trey comes closer to me, invading my personal space again. “I’m stronger than I look, Trey. Even Jax said so.”
“You think you’re strong? Handle me then, Kricket,” he says, pulling me to him with his hands on my upper arms.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” I whisper, feeling my entire being light up at the nearness of him.
“How can you hurt me, Kricket, when I’m so much stronger than you?”
I gaze into his eyes, seeing his brows drawing together in anger. “If I lean in…” I say softly, focusing on his lips, “close to you…so close that it makes my breath catch in my chest, and then I…” Closing my eyes, I brush my lips gently against his, feeling heat rush through me as Trey’s hands slip to my back, crushing me to him.
I wrap my arms around the back of his neck and speaking against his lips, I continue, “then I could just let the common symmetry that exists between us force you to see that you’re mine...” I kiss him, “and I’m lost without you...”
Slowly tracing his lips with mine, he begins responding to my kisses with his own, before I pull back from him a fraction. I squeeze my eyes shut tight and say, “And then, I could tell you that none of that matters in this world…that because we share this common symmetry, the space between us will be filled with an undeniable gravity…pulling us toward one another. So that, when you commit to Charisma, we can’t be friends, because my heart won’t understand the distinction. It won’t understand that you’ll be hers…not mine.”
Trey’s arms tighten around me as he leans his forehead against mine. Softly, he whispers, “Kricket…”
I give a humorless laugh. “As it turns out, my heart isn’t made of stone…no matter how much I wish that it were.” My fingertips slip to his chest, feeling his rock hard strength beneath them. “But it doesn’t matter.”
“It doesn’t?” He lifts my chin so that I’ll look in his eyes.
“No…I’m going to ask Manus to replace you as my bodyguard, Trey,” I reply, feeling like I’m choking.
“WHAT?” Trey scowls, like he can’t believe what he’s hearing.
“You can’t stay here. Kyon isn’t blind—it must be written all over my face when I look at you. Anyone I love is a threat to him and he has the Brotherhood behind him,” I say, feeling adrenaline ignite in my blood as the look on Trey’s face goes from angry to deadly.
“What did he say to you?” Trey asks, his violet eyes narrowing.
“He just told me what you already know. Anyone I love will be marked for death,” I whisper, feeling overwhelming sadness hit me.
“I thought you were a fighter, Kricket,” Trey says. “You’re just going to give in to Kyon because he will retaliate if you don’t?”
“I am a fighter, Trey,” I say, pulling out of his embrace and straightening my spine. “But, I don’t want you here!”
“That’s not your decision, Kricket.”
“I’m making it my decision.”
“You need me and I’m staying here.”
“Not if I insist that you leave,” I reply, feeling instantly irritated with him because he’s totally ignoring the fact that I just told him that I love him.
“How will you argue for my reassignment with Manus?” Trey asks me quietly.
“I’ll just tell him that I’ve developed…certain feelings for you that makes it hard for me to be around you everyday.”
Seeing Trey try to suppress a frown, he glances away and says, “Manus won’t relieve me of my duties because you have a crush on me.”
“A…crush? Did you say a crush?” I want to hit him as my cheeks flood with color.
“Yes. You’re young and we have been in some very unorthodox situations together. It’s inevitable that certain feelings would arise, but…they’ll pass,” he states, like he’s a seasoned veteran when it comes to this kind of thing.
Closing my eyes, I want to die right here. My throat tightens. “You don’t think that I’m capable of love?”
“You’ve only known me a few rotations…you’re only a few floans old—you’ve been raised in the near absence of love, Kricket,” he says softly.
“Trey, you can tell me you don’t want my love or that you don’t love me, too, but don’t ever tell me what I feel or don’t feel,” I warn him, crossing my arms.
“You can’t love me,” he says seriously, looking like he’s in pain now. “It’s impossible.”
“It’s not impossible because I do love you,” I reply heatedly. When he just stares at me and doesn’t say anything, my heart throbs painfully in my chest. “Well,” I say quietly, “at least it’s just my heart, not yours. You should be relieved. Now you can be done here and go back to your life.” I walk to the door and open it for him. Looking straight ahead, I wait for him to walk through it.
“I’m not going to step aside. You need me here, especially with Kyon in residence,” Trey pauses on the threshold. “You’re just confused right now…it will pass.”
I raise my chin, feeling like he slapped me. “Lucky for me I have your wisdom to guide me.”
“I’m not going anywhere, Kricket, so save yourself the embarrassing conversation with Manus. We can talk about this when you’ve had time to think about it.”
“Can’t wait,” I reply, holding my breath until he leaves the room. Closing the door, I lean against it, wanting badly to pound my head against it for being so stupid. What did I expect from Trey I ask myself, a declaration of undying love? He loves someone else and I’m just a…what do they call it? A lurker.
“You’re pathetic,” I whisper to myself.
**
Unfortunately, I don’t have time to wallow in my pain. I spend the next several weeks wading through social gatherings at the palace. I fake smile at dinner parties, teas, and luncheons with the Regent, Rafe officials, and foreign dignitaries from Wurthem, Comantre, and Peney. I try to listen to every word that may have significance as to what’s happening within Rafe and outside its borders.
After each event, the Regent and I usually have a Q & A regarding who lied about what and what I was able to uncover covertly. And, if that’s not hard enough, these meetings always include Trey as my personal protection slash reminder that I suck at love. But, I look forward to these meetings in a sick, pathetic way because they are the few times that Trey and I say anything to each other. He asks me questions and I answer him, but when we’re alone, like in the skiff, neither of us has much to say.
That doesn’t mean that the common symmetry between us has gone away. On the contrary, now that we don’t talk, the attraction is all I can feel. I find myself counting when I am near him. I count how many times he glances at me or looks up when my name is mentioned. I count how rapid my breathing becomes when he walks into the room, or how much it slows when he leaves it.
Kicking off my heels and tossing my wrap on my bed, I reach up to try to catch the clasp on the exquisite necklace the Regent wanted me to wear to the dinner party this evening.
“Here, let me do that,” Aella says, swiftly releasing me from the heavy collar.
“Ahh, thank you,” I sigh, feeling like I can breathe again.
“This came for you while you were at
dinner,” Aella says, handing me a card, while putting the necklace back in a box to take with her.
“Who is it from?” I hold still as Aella begins unhooking all the clasps on the evening gown of pale yellow satin.
“Ateur Braedan. He wants you to ride with him tomorrow.”
“Oh, that could be fun,” I murmur, having had a few riding lessons from my tutor, Tofer. “Is Victus going to be there, too?” Those two seem to always be together.
“No…he wants to ride with you alone,” she says, helping me step out of the gown.
My brow wrinkles. “Why?” I ask, while slipping into a pair of pajama bottoms Aella had made for me at my request. She also made up some thin t-shirts and tanks for me, but she always looks disapproving when I put one on, like now, because she says they make me look “human.”
“Probably because he desires you,” she replies, and I scoff, like she’s making a joke.
“Yeah, no, seriously, does it say?” I glance at the card.
“I am serious,” she smiles. “He’s sent several notes to you requesting to be your dinner partner or to take a stroll on the grounds with him.”
“He has?” I exclaim, shocked. “Why haven’t I seen them?”
“Security screened them,” she says, folding the gown in tissue and placing it in a box to be laundered.
“Security?” I ask, frowning.
“Mmm,” she says absently. “You get lots of stuff that never gets through. I had to send back a mountain of things from Haut Nim himself. Jewelry, furs, clothes, scents…you name it, he has sent it.”
“Haut Nim?” I ask.
“Haut Kyon,” Aella replies with an ironic expression. “He couldn’t get an audience with you if the entire Alameeda army shows up on the grounds, not that it stops him from trying everyday.”
“I thought he left,” I say honestly, feeling fear rush through me. “I haven’t seen him around.”
“The Regent agreed with Kesek Trey that Haut Kyon is too much for you to contend with while you’re trying to assimilate here. He’s been kept away for your protection,” Aella states, picking up the boxes. “Do you want me to agree to the ride with Ateur Braedan?”
“Uhh, no. I don’t really feel like riding,” I say, feeling awkward. “Oh, here…I asked the footman tonight for an extra piece of that cocoa fantasy cake you love,” I say, handing her the small box.
“You are my favorite Etharian, Kricket!” Aella says, happily taking the treat from me.
“Well, you’re Sergen’s favorite Etharian. When I told him that it was for you, he tried to give me the whole top tier of the cake.”
Aella blushes, looking delighted. “I’ll thank him tomorrow. Good night, Kricket.”
“Good night, Aella,” I smile, watching her place everything in a hover courier and program it to transport the cargo for her.
As I lie in my bed, I try to take my mind off the events of the evening by flipping mindlessly through the programs on the hologram vision. But, I keep focusing on the fact that things are getting entirely too scary to ignore. Seeing the alarm in Manus’s eyes tonight when I told him about the Peney ambassador’s lie regarding the breakdown in talks with the Alameeda over their renewed interest in the Tectonic Peninsula has me worried, too.
I’ve learned that the Tectonic Peninsula is a strategic area of land owned by Peney. It would be integral for mounting an offense against Rafe because it would allow Alameeda a staging point for their troops through its ports and airspace. If Alameeda secures it, then they eliminate the protracted resupplying of those troops.
After an hour of tossing and turning in bed, I throw my blanket aside with a huff. Getting up, I creep down to the first floor and head to the back of the house where the kitchen is located. I nearly collide with Drex and Fenton. They’re patrolling the halls of the manor with large weapons that look like machine guns, but can shoot projectiles, lasers, or electricity, depending on the need.
“What are you doing up, Kricket? Do you know what time it is?” Fenton asks, with a cheeky grin, eyeing my pajamas.
“I’m going to the kitchen…I mean the ‘keuken’ to see if there’s any venish left or if Wayra ate it all,” I say, smiling at him.
“He ate it,” Drex and Fenton say in unison.
“Oh,” I sigh disappointedly, “figures. Can I bring either of you back something?”
They both look at each other and grin. Drex says, “Ah, no. We have to patrol the perimeter, but we’re playing fritzer later, if you’re interested.”
“Didn’t I already take all of your money, Drex?” I grin, backing down the hall.
“Yeah, you knob knocker, she already skinned ya. You want to keep bleeding coin, keep trying to best a priestess,” Fenton insults Drex. “She can probably see right through your cards.”
“Can you?” Drex asks, looking intrigued.
“I’ll never tell,” I reply, putting my finger to my lips before turning and walking toward the kitchen.
Going directly to the commissary unit, located on the kitchen wall, I browse through the pictures of entrée’s still available.
As I pick up the plate of savory pheasant, I nearly drop it when I turn and see Kyon sitting at the long, black soapstone table with his feet up on it. “Kyon!” I gasp, “You scared me! What are you doing here?”
“I had to see you. You’ve been ignoring me,” he replies, looking relaxed as he pulls his feet off the table. He sees me look toward the entrance to the kitchen and says, “Please sit. I came to talk to you.”
I set my plate down on the table across from him and sit down. “How did you know I’d be here?” I ask him, suspicious.
Kyon’s blue eyes meet mine. “Em Quinn said you didn’t eat much at dinner this evening. I took the chance that you’d be hungry later,” he smiles at me. His blond hair is pulled back from his face and the soft light makes it look darker—more golden.
“That’s interesting. Does the ambassador of Peney often spy for you?” I ask, feeling uneasy that Em Quinn is passing information about me to Kyon.
He relaxes in his chair; his massive shoulders block the seatback from sight. “When the need warrants it and it costs him nothing.”
I grasp my fork more tightly. “Interesting. So, why are you here?”
“I’ve come to talk to you about the growing tension between the houses. There is unrest. We’re on the brink of war, Kricket,” he says honestly, watching my reaction.
Fear threads through me with icy fingers. “Can it be avoided?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Alameeda is meant to rule Ethar,” Kyon replies. “You’re a part of that, Kricket. You’re of Alameeda, too.”
“Do you know how ridiculous you sound?” I see Kyon’s eyebrows draw together. “That sounds like comic book crap. Only complete morons want to take over the world.”
“The Brotherhood has a vision, Kricket. They want a peaceful world for their people.” His words chill me.
“Their people, but not all people,” I say. “What happens to everyone else?”
He shrugs, “I don’t know, but I’ll protect you when that day comes.”
Goosebumps form all over my body. “I can’t be a part of any of that, Kyon.”
“You’ll feel differently when the house of Rafe falls. I came here tonight to tell you that I have to leave Rafe. I want you to come with me.”
“I’ll take my chances here, thanks,” I reply, feeling myself growing paler by the second.
“You know that they’re just using you for your gifts.”
“And it would be different with you, how?”
“It would be different with me. I care for you,” he says, looking annoyed…but honest.
“I’m staying here. My friends need me,” I reply.
Kyon leans toward me calmly, setting his enormous hands on the table. “He doesn’t need you, Kricket. He’s going to commit to someone else and when he does, you’ll be dying to be anywhere but here.” T
he truth of his statement knocks the breath out of me.
“That’s not your problem,” I say, looking away from his piercing blue eyes.
“It is my problem,” Kyon replies with menace in his voice.
“I don’t want your help.”
“With your upbringing, I’m sure you’ve already seen that want and need are two very different things,” he states, rising from his chair at the table and pacing the room. “Rafe and Comantre can’t possibly hold out against us this time. You’re on the losing side.”
“What makes this time so different from last time?”
“Last time, there was a neutral house.”
“Peney? Peney is siding with Alameeda? Are they going to relinquish the Tectonic Peninsula?” I breathe, feeling panic rush through me.
“They will,” Kyon replies, frowning. “It’s war, Kricket, the likes of which you probably can’t even imagine…yet. Alameeda only needed a sign to rally around to get us here…and that’s you, Kricket.”
“Me?” I feel ill.
“Yes…the Brotherhood believes that you are the one spoken of in the prophecy. The priestess born of two houses that will bring about the demise of one, leaving one house to rule Ethar,” he replies grimly.
“Who—”
“Your mother was prolific, especially in the realm of precognition. She saw many things.”
“Which house will fall?” I ask, not sure if I can trust what he believes to be true because it sounds like a bunch of freaky nonsense. But, even if it is nonsense, if the Alameeda believe it, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
“I was hoping you could tell me that, Kricket,” he replies speculatively. “Come with me now and I’ll work with you to develop your gifts.”
“I don’t think I want that gift, Kyon. Especially when it can be used to pinpoint future Rafe positions and predict their next move.”
“Ah, so you’ve learned what some priestesses can do?” he asks. “You’ll participate, either way…you just need to choose a side…unless, you want to play for both sides.”
“What?” My hands begin to shake beneath the table.
Under Different Stars Page 22
