This couldn’t be good.
“No. I was uh…” He thought back to the unstirred glass of strawberry milk on his counter, the COMP TIA certification book on the bed he was going to stay up late and study with. “I was up.”
She raised a cigarette to her mouth, sucked in a drag, and perched her lips out to the side to blow the smoke away from him. “Can I come in?”
“Of course…” He stepped back so she’d have space to enter. “You’re alone?”
“Yeah…”
As Nicole stepped by him, Andy wondered where Danny was, and why she was here in the wee hours of the morning without him. “Where’s my brother?” He shut the door, flipping the deadbolt back into place.
“I don’t know.”
Andy sighed. A familiar story. “Ah. Okay. Want to sit down?”
She looked at her cigarette and gasped. “Shit! Sorry Andy, I forgot to put it out.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. You don’t need your house smelling like cigarettes again. You’ve done such a good job quitting. I don’t want you to be tempted.”
On that last word, Andy glanced at her tanned legs. He quickly looked away. “It’s fine. I still have some gum left if I feel the need.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes. Can I get you anything to drink?”
“Whatever you’re drinking is fine.”
Andy smiled. “Strawberry milk?”
“You’ve got to be kidding.”
He pointed at the counter. Looking past him, she smiled. She must have seen the glass, the pinkish colored milk, the spoon sitting inside and leaning to the side.
Nicole nodded. “Sure.”
“Have a seat. I’ll make you a glass.”
“Okay.”
As she got comfortable, Andy rushed about the kitchen. He finished mixing his glass, then made another for Nicole. He took a plastic cup down from the cabinet, filled it halfway with water, and set it with the milks. Then he carefully carried all three into the living room.
Walking around the couch, he spotted Nicole’s legs right away. She had leaned back on the couch, crossing the right over her left knee. Her already short shorts pulled back even more on her thigh. She could have been wearing only panties from how much leg was exposed. Averting his gaze, he looked her in the eye and smiled. “A drink for the lady.”
Laughing, Nicole took one of the milks. “Can’t believe I’m about to drink strawberry milk. I don’t think I’ve had any since I was a kid.”
“And here’s an ash tray,” he said, passing her the half-filled cup of water.
“Ah, thanks.” She took it. Leaning forward, she put both feet on the floor and secured the water cup between her bare feet. Andy wondered if she’d come over barefoot, but noticed her flip-flops on the other side of her.
He wanted to sit beside her, but figured it was best if he took the chair to her left. So, he did. He sipped his milk. It tasted sweet and delicious. Wiping the milk moustache off his lip, he said, “So…” He frowned, not sure how he should begin. Unable to think of any other way than just bluntly asking her, he shrugged. “Is everything all right?”
Nicole liked the milk. She guzzled it halfway down before answering. “I don’t know.” She leaned over to put the milk on the end table separating the furniture. Her tank top hiked up to her ribs, exposing a range of dusky skin, the jut of her hip bone. Sitting up, she adjusted the shirt. Andy felt disappointed, and a little ashamed, she’d covered herself.
“You can probably guess why I’m here,” she added.
“I imagine it has something to do with Danny.”
“Ding-ding,” she said without humor. “That would be correct.”
“So what’s going on?”
“I really don’t know,” she said. “I just thought if I came here…maybe you could help me figure it out.”
Andy studied Nicole. She looked exhausted. The heaviness in her eyes easily showed that. He also sensed heavy frustration, confusion, and lots of anger. “Is Danny in some kind of trouble?”
Wouldn’t be the first time.
“I’m sure he is,” she said. “I just don’t know what kind.”
“Well, tell me what you do know.”
She nodded while putting another cigarette in her mouth. She lighted it, inhaling deeply. “I think he’s back on the shards again.”
Andy groaned. “Why do you say that?”
“It’s easier to explain his behavior if he is.”
Frowning, Andy shook his head. “I don’t…understand what you mean by that.”
“Well…he lost his job at the scrapyard.”
“Oh boy, I bet his probation officer loved that.”
“This time it wasn’t his fault. They didn’t have the money to keep him on payroll. So, he was back at home on unemployment while they hunted for a job for him. He started spending a lot of time on the internet.”
“Was he watching a lot of porn?”
Danny had always been a porn addict, even when they were kids. Back then, while hanging out at the mall, Danny would find an adult willing to pick up a couple nudie magazines in the bookstore for him. So, he’d slip them a twenty dollar bill, and they would return with a bag toting three magazines, which Danny would spend all night devouring.
Nicole had never acted bothered by Danny’s obsession with porn, so if his brother was watching it now she wouldn’t be here to complain about it.
“Barely, and that was what bothered me. He was looking for something.”
“Like what?”
She flicked a chimney of ashes into the cup. It sizzled when hitting the water. “I don’t know. All I know is that he was obsessed with whatever it was. I couldn’t even get him to fuck me anymore.”
.
Andy felt a hot pinch in his stomach. He looked at Nicole’s legs again and couldn’t stop the vision he had of them wrapped around his brother’s waist. Picturing her body jerking upward as Danny thrust into her made his mouth go dry.
“I don’t need to know the specifics.”
“Good. I’m honestly too embarrassed to share them. I tried almost everything to get Danny to notice me again.”
“And you don’t know what he was so hooked on finding?”
“All I know is it was a place, some kind of club, I think. You know how Danny is with anything…he allows himself to become addicted to it. His lawyer called it an addict’s personality. So, finding this place consumed him. I think Rosco told him about it, because they both were crazy about finding it. But, I don’t know for sure.”
“Great. He’s running around with Rosco again?”
“Can you believe it? Why tempt the snake to bite you?”
“Does Rosco still deal for his brother, Lou Manchu?”
She nodded. “Oh yeah. But, they never did any drugs in the trailer; I made sure of that. I kept reminding Danny that if he failed a drug test, he’d go back to jail and have to serve the remainder of his eight year sentence. It seemed to keep him in line for a few days.”
“When did all this start?”
“Not even two weeks ago, but he lost his job last month. So, sometime in that short span of time he heard about…whatever this place is.”
“Where’s Danny now?”
She took a long, deep pull on the cigarette. The paper and tobacco crackled as the end lit up to a bright red. She exhaled a thick grayish cloud. “I have no idea. He hasn’t come home since he left with Rosco on Friday.”
Andy resisted a shiver.
Nicole continued. “And he was supposed to meet his probation officer this morning. She’s been blowing up my phone, trying to find Danny, I’m sure. I’ve been avoiding her calls because I don’t know what to tell her. I’m worried, Andy. Either way, he’s screwed, but I’d at least like to know where he is so I can get him home.”
“Do you know where to look for him?”
She shook her head. “Have I ever?”
“Well…”
�
�You’ve been much better at finding him in the past. And I’m sure he’s off on a binge somewhere, sleeping on someone’s floor all day, getting high all night. He wiped out our bank account. Not that there was much in there to begin with.”
“Do you need any money?”
“No. I have my secret stash. The last time he did this, I started a secret account that he doesn’t know about. I’ve been saving money in it.”
Nodding, Andy leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He pushed the tips of his fingers together. “Have you called the police?”
“No. Not yet. I know what they’ll say if I do. They’ll just pass it off as another ex-junkie relapsing and not care. Since he’s done this a couple times before, they’ll tell me to wait on him to run out of money, and he’ll come home.”
He understood why she thought that. It was basically the exact wording the cops had used on her two years ago.
“And, if I call the police,” she said, “they’ll alert his probation officer and that’ll be it.”
“Like you said, it’s going to be it no matter what. I’m afraid he’s really screwed himself this time.”
“I know.” Tears misted her eyes.
“All right. I’ll go check his usual places and see what I can come up with.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind?”
Andy did mind. He was tired of Danny’s behavior a long time ago. Being only two years younger than Andy, he acted as if he was still a teenager. He struggled with authority and seemed to go out of his way to hurt those that cared about him the most. Like Nicole. Andy hated seeing her so upset, so lonely. Whenever he saw her, he was reminded that his feelings for her had never waned. He still loved her. And when he saw her like this, he seemed to love her even more.
She chose this life. She broke up with me for Danny. This is her bed.
He immediately felt awful for thinking such things.
“No,” he answered, “I don’t mind.”
She smiled. “Thank you. You always take care of me.”
Andy wanted to remind her that he cared about her. He didn’t. She didn’t need to hear his lecture about the kind of man she’d chosen to marry.
Nicole started to stand.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“I was going to head home. It’s late. I’m tired, and I’m sure you are too.”
“Sure you wouldn’t rather stay?”
Her eyebrows rose. “Inviting me to a sleepover?”
“Sure. I’ve got more strawberry syrup and nearly a gallon of milk. We can go crazy.”
Nicole laughed. To Andy, it was a cherished sound. Nodding, she sat back down on the couch. “Are you sure you don’t mind? I was dreading the drive back anyway.”
“It’s fine. You can take the bed and I’ll take the couch or vice versa.”
“Where are you sleeping?” she asked.
“I planned on the bed, unless you want to take it.”
“Can I join you?”
“Wha…um…” Andy’s stomach felt as if it burst into a flurry of pinpricks.
“I don’t want to be alone.”
“Okay,” he said, his voice betraying him and dropping to a whisper.
Chapter Two
Lying on his back in bed, eyes glued to the ceiling, Andy listened to the pattering hiss of the shower coming through the closed bathroom door. Although the house was small, it had two bathrooms crammed within. The one in his bedroom had been added by his father back when Andy was twelve and Danny ten. Tired of the boys hogging the one bathroom, he added this one in the master bedroom just for him and Mom.
Andy felt the familiar lump in his throat that always appeared when he thought about his childhood. Sometimes he regretted not selling the house. He’d lived here for a year and a half and still wasn’t completely comfortable.
When a motorcycle crash killed his father four years ago, everything was left to Mom, except a separate life insurance policy that was split between the boys. Andy put his in the bank and lived off it while he went back to school to straighten his life out. When Andy walked away from his old lifestyle, he also walked away from friends he’d known since middle school. He gave up dealing, partying, going to clubs. Old friends started accusing him of having a ‘better than you’ complex. Now that Andy was better off, he’d never been more alone in all his life. No one came to hang out, no invites to go out. Andy Raab had become a hermit, an internet college recluse.
Danny spent his share of the life insurance money on drugs and an abundance of useless crap he later pawned for more drug money.
Two years ago Mom’s health declined. The doctors told Andy she’d given up on herself. Life without Dad was too much for her and her body had begun to shut down. She died of heart failure in a hospital room with Andy sitting in a chair at her bedside. It took him two days to find Danny and tell him the news. He hadn’t shown up for the funeral but made sure he attended the will reading. It had been pointless for him to come, though, because Mom left everything to Andy.
That was the beginning of the end to Andy and Danny’s diminishing relationship.
What have you gotten yourself into now, Danny?
Andy wasn’t sure he cared anymore. He must, since he was willing to venture out yet another time to find him. If Nicole hadn’t pled for help, Andy might have left Danny to rot wherever he was.
His parents would have hated that. Danny was a prisoner to his own afflictions, but he still needed help. No matter what, though, this would be the last time Andy offered any help. Didn’t matter if Nicole came crying, dropped on her knees and begged, he wasn’t going to bail Danny out of another jam. Not after this one.
Andy heard a soft thump from the bathroom and realized the water was no longer running. He envisioned Nicole on the other side of the door, toweling off her slippery body. He could see little beads of water trickling down her skin, a thin steam rising from her pores. One foot propped on the side of the bathtub, she slowly ran a towel down her thigh, over a knee. He felt himself becoming aroused. Reaching under the blanket, he tugged at his shorts to give some room while he willed the erection down.
Andy had already brushed his teeth and was wearing a pair of running shorts and nothing else. He’d thought about putting on a T-shirt, but the only one that was clean, he’d loaned to Nicole. He could have found something to put on, but he kind of wanted to be shirtless being so close to Nicole. Somewhere deep inside himself, he hoped they would be doing more than sleeping tonight. It had happened in the past multiple times, and when he dated Nicole, it happened frequently.
You’d be a pretty big bastard if you allowed yourself to take advantage of Nicole.
Sighing, he was about to climb out of bed and put on a shirt from the hamper when the bathroom door opened. He gasped at what he saw.
Nicole’s hair, damp and freshly brushed, draped the oversized T-shirt. It dampened the shoulders, making the shirt as clear as glass. He could see the dark streaks of her skin through the wet fabric. With the light behind her, the T-shirt was translucent. The dark shapes of her breasts showed like shadowy humps. He saw no lines for panties or a bra. She was naked under the T-shirt.
Andy had expected her to put the shorts she’d been wearing back on. She hadn’t. Seeing her this way caused him to involuntarily gulp. His penis started to stiffen once more.
Nicole sighed a relieved breath.
“Feel better?” he asked.
“Much. Thank you. I don’t know what it is about taking a shower somewhere else. You always feel so refreshed afterwards.”
“Yeah. Like at a hotel.”
Nicole nodded. “Right. Those are the best.” She shook a hand through her wet hair, pausing when she noticed his bare chest.
Although she didn’t say anything about it, Andy pulled the blankets up higher.
“Are you sure you don’t mind me sleeping with you?” she asked.
“No…I don’t mind.”
“Don’t have any girlfriends that m
ight make a surprise visit and find me snuggled up to you, do you?”
Andy’s chest vibrated. “No. No girlfriends.”
What if Danny drove by and saw Nicole’s car parked outside? That would be a surprise neither of them needed.
He won’t.
Nicole shook her head. “They don’t know what they’re missing.” Smiling, she reached into the bathroom and turned off the light. All that illuminated the room now was a lamp on the nightstand. It was a low-wattage bulb that hardly reached the other side of the room, but it was great to read a book by.
She started making her way around the foot of the bed to the other side. Andy supposed he could have slid over to save her the trip, but he hadn’t thought about it until now. He couldn’t wait to have her close to him, but he was dreading the mind games he’d suffer afterward. The guilt, confusion, the shame, would nearly tear Andy apart, just like the other times. He’d brought it on himself, permitting her to get in bed with him. If anything else happened, he would be just as much to blame as she was.
And what about her? Why does she always come to me whenever something goes wrong?
And now, like before, he wondered why she’d chosen Danny over him.
The pull of the blankets recalled Andy back to the bedroom. He looked to his left and saw Nicole folding down the blankets so she could get in. She climbed onto the mattress. The shirt fell back on her legs and Andy glimpsed between her legs. He quickly looked away as she adjusted the shirt, then pulled the blankets over her shoulder. She squirmed close to him, nudging his arm with her head.
“Open up,” she said.
Andy raised his arm so she could wiggle into the spot on his chest. She’d called it her spot and he supposed it was. He’d never let anyone but her lay there. He felt the cool dampness of her hair on his skin.
She sighed. “There we go.”
“Comfy?”
“Very comfy.”
Andy stroked her back, noting the slick warm feel of her skin through the shirt. She’d used his soap and shampoo to clean herself, and yet she still smelled different than he would after a shower. Better. Cleaner. He took a heavy whiff, hoping she wouldn’t notice him sniffing her.
The Skin Show Page 3
