by Rachel Ford
Kel nodded. “It’s a terrible business and he’s going to be in a lot of pain for a long time. But he should resume full use of his member. And the other testicle is undamaged.” He added apologetically, “I know it doesn’t help much now, but long term at least…he’ll be able to resume a normal life. You’ll be able to have more children down the road.”
He was right, of course. Things could be worse, and she supposed that she should be grateful that they weren’t. But right now, she couldn’t think of the long term. She couldn’t be happy that her husband’s mutilation had been limited in scope. All she could think of was how much Grel must have suffered, of the agony he’d endured in captivity.
“He’s going to be in surgery most of the day.” He glanced at her. “I won’t tell you it’s not without risks, Nik. He’s been through more than most could handle already. The surgeries themselves should not be high risk, but in the circumstance…” He shook his head. “The risks will be heightened. Still, it needs to be done.”
She swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded. “Do what you have to, doctor.”
“Let me get you something, Nik. A sedative, to help you sleep.”
“No.” She shook her head. “I don’t want to sleep.”
“It’ll be hours before he’s out, and longer before he’s awake.”
“I know…I just…can’t sleep. Not while he’s in surgery.”
Kel nodded. “Alright. If you change your mind, I’ll have it ready anyway. Nurse Tor can give it to you.”
“Thank you, Doctor Kel. But I won’t.”
He smiled. “I will prepare it all the same. You should say your goodbyes now, Nik. We’ll take him back for surgery within the quarter hour.”
She did. He was already sedated, so she knew he could not hear her. But she kissed his brow, his bloodied and discolored brow. And then she took his hand and pressed it to her lips too, hot tears rolling down her cheeks as she did so. “I love you, Grel. Stay with me, my love.”
The day ran long. Dr. Kel’s staff had converted a back room into a private waiting area for Elsa and Nikia, so they could avoid the stares of other patients. They – Nik in particular – were a strange sight, red-eyed and covered in blood. She’d gone to the washroom, of course, and done what she could to wipe away Grel’s blood. But the suit was ruined. Blood had seeped deep into the weave, and it wasn’t going to come out.
Elsa asked after Grel, and then wrapped an arm around her daughter when she got her answer. There was not much to say, and they spoke little. The hours ticked by.
Despite assuring Dr. Kel that she couldn’t sleep, Nikia did drift off. She wasn’t sure for how long, but when she woke, she heard her father’s voice. It was low and seemed faraway. At first, she thought she was still asleep and dreaming.
“It doesn’t sound like they’ll press charges,” he was saying. “Not after this.”
“That’s good at least,” Elsa responded.
Nikia stirred, and realized vaguely that her mother was no longer at her side.
“Yes,” Luk agreed. “It is. But that son-of-a-bitch Ridi is going to walk. And, gods damn him, Dru more or less said Nik got nothing more than she deserved. He called her a collaborator.”
“What does Leas say?”
“He thinks we shouldn’t push it. If we do, we risk them changing their mind about Grel. And you know what Nik will say.”
Elsa sighed. “She won’t do anything that puts him in further harm’s way.”
“Godsdammit,” Luk snapped, his voice still low. “I wish he would have the same damned consideration.”
“Shh,” her mother hushed. “No one could have foreseen this, Luk.”
“No,” he agreed. “Maybe not. But if he won’t think of our baby, I wish he’d at least think of his own. He had to know sooner or later this revolution business would catch up to him. And from him, her – and now, the baby.”
“Luk,” Elsa said, and her tone was sharper now. “Stop. It’s done.”
He sighed. “I know. I know, Elsie. I just…if you’d see Dru sitting there, so pleased with himself…I could have killed him. With my bare hands. Him and Ridi.”
“I know, love. But that boy’s in a world of hurt. And Nik’s a wreck. The last thing either of them need is finger pointing and recriminations. It’s the last thing our family needs, too.”
Chapter Seventeen
Grel woke to find Nik by his side. Her face was drawn, and she looked weary, with deep, dark ruts under her eyes. But she smiled at the sight of him. “Grel. You’re awake.”
“Nik,” he said. He tried to sit up, and then groaned. “Oh gods.”
“Don’t move, love. They just stitched you back up. You’re not supposed to be moving for a while yet.” She took his hand, squeezing it.
He took a moment to consider the sensations passing through his body. The truth was, now that he’d stopped moving, he didn’t feel much of anything. But, at the periphery of his awareness, there was a dull throb of pain. “How much painkiller am I on?” he wondered.
“A lot.” She pressed his hand again. “But you’re going to be alright. Doctor Kel had to reset one of your ribs. It was pressing into your lungs. And you’ve got some bad burns. They had to remove some necrotic tissue, where the prod was used. And…well, the list doesn’t matter. Suffice it to say, you were in rough shape, but Kel’s patched you back up.” She smiled. “Good as new.”
Something told him that, once the painkiller started wearing off, he was going to have a very different perception of his situation. But for the moment he smiled too. Then, though, he remembered the question that had been preying on his mind every time he’d lapse into awareness. “What about you, Nik?”
“I’m fine,” she said quickly.
He squeezed her hand in turn. “Are you sure?”
“I’m fine now, anyway,” she said, and this time there was truth to her tone.
“That protector? He didn’t-” He seemed to choke on the words. “I mean, he left you be, afterwards?” He’d seen Ridi release Nik. But then he’d lost consciousness. He didn’t know what had happened after that.
She flushed. “Yes.”
“I’m sorry, Nik. I’m so, so sorry that happened to you.”
“It’s not your fault, Grel,” she said, and her expression was pained.
Her pain cut through the fog of his painkillers, straight to his heart. “I’m your husband,” he said simply. “I should have been able to protect you.”
“What man can protect anyone from a dozen armed protectors?” she demanded. “Don’t say things like that, Grel. It wasn’t your fault. You did what you could. They nearly killed you for it.”
“It wasn’t enough. I should have listened, Nik. I should have listened to your father, and quit before I ever put you in danger.”
“Oh Grel.” Her voice trembled. “How could you have known? You did the right thing, you fought for our people. You didn’t break the laws or hurt anyone.”
“No,” he agreed. “But that doesn’t matter. I didn’t realize it before, but I do now. We won’t win. We can’t win, Nik.” He shook his head. “Because they’ll kill us first.”
Her husband slept most of the next day, and Nikia did too. Once Kel discharged him, Luk and Elsa had a room prepared in their own home for their daughter and son-in-law. “You can leave as soon as you like,” her father had reassured them, “once Grel’s back on his feet. You’re welcome to stay, of course; but if you can’t, we understand. But that can be sorted later. For now, you need to be safe.”
“And don’t worry about work, Nik,” Elsa told her. “I spoke to your supervisor. He’s granted you a leave, as long as you need.”
Neither had argued. Nikia was grateful to be behind the walls of the Aldir estate, with its locked gates and armed guards. There’d be no protectors knocking down these doors. Grel didn’t complain either, though how he felt about it she could not say. His spirits were very low that first day, and only got lower as the sedatives b
egan to wear off.
Elsa and Luk were attentive and kind, but gave them their space too. Her focus was on Grel, but Nikia saw it, and was profoundly grateful for their generosity and sensitivity. She knew, she’d always known, how they felt about her husband. She’d heard her father’s words when he’d thought her asleep. But, even if it was only for her sake, they showed him so much compassion and care that she felt her love for them grow with every interaction.
Doctor Kel came to call the next morning, and after noting that Grel’s sutures seemed fine, his swelling down, and his bleeding stopped, he turned his focus to her. “Any pain or cramps, Nik?”
“No.”
“Any bleeding? Or nausea, for that matter?”
“No, nothing.”
He nodded. “Good. But I want you to take it easy. Rest a lot. Drink plenty of water. These last days have been particularly traumatic, on top of all the stress. You don’t want that to impact the pregnancy.”
Once he’d left, Nik sidled onto the bed beside Grel – carefully, because movement brought him fresh waves of pain. “How are you, love?”
He took her hand. “Well,” he sighed, “I can barely walk. It hurts to laugh. It hurts to breathe. It hurts to pee. I’ve been better.”
“Oh Grel.” She moved closer, so that her head rested beside his shoulder. “My poor Grel.”
“I’ll live, love.” He brought her hand to his lips, wincing as he did so, and kissed it. “And what about you? How’s my Nik?”
She smiled at him, and he at her. “I’ll live too.”
“That bruise looks awful, darling.”
“That’s not a very nice thing to say to your wife,” she teased.
He still grinned, but there was a familiar concern in his eyes too. “I’m sorry, love. So sorry that I got you into this.”
“You didn’t get me into anything, Grel,” she told him, and she meant it. “I would go with you anywhere.”
“And you usually have such good judgment.”
She laughed and kissed him. “I mean it though, darling. Wherever we go from here, I’ll be there at your side.”
He held her gaze. “I’ll remember that,” he said, adding with a hint of a smile, “when I can go anywhere, I mean.” He squeezed her hand. “I haven’t thought much like a husband, lately. I was too focused on other things; I was too focused on the cause to think straight. I’ve been stupid and reckless.”
“You haven’t,” she protested. “You did what you had to, Grel.”
“No, I was. But no more. From now on, you come first, Nik. You and the baby.”
Chapter Eighteen
“We need you to remain in orbit, Captain Elgin,” Admiral Lenksha was saying.
“I’m not sure I understand, sir,” Elgin answered. “What am I waiting for?”
“Hopefully nothing. But after the riots the other week, we need your squadron of fighters on hand.”
“Fighters?” He shook his head. “For riots, sir?”
“It’s just a precaution. You’ll probably be on a new assignment within the week. But in case there’s more trouble, we need to know our Protectors have eyes in the sky backing them up.”
“What kind of backup are we talking, sir?” It sounded to him like they were talking about using military fighters on civilian targets. And Lenksha was doing everything in his power to avoiding putting a name to it.
“That’ll depend on the situation,” the admiral sidestepped. “But we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. In the meantime, Elgin, keep your people on standby. If we need you to break atmosphere, we’ll let you know. Lenksha out.”
The screen went black, and Elgin scowled at it. What in the name of all the gods is going on? he wondered. It was almost beyond comprehension that a sitting admiral would have suggested what he’d just heard Lenksha say. And yet…he’d heard it, after all.
He knew the situation was bad. He’d heard about arrests and property damage, of injuries and even deaths. But calling down military fighters on the premier city of the Tribari empire, on civilians no less? It was beyond the pale.
He remained in his seat for a few minutes, still staring daggers at the dark viewscreen.
A knock sounded at his door. “Enter.”
It was Lt. Fal. “Sir,” the young man saluted. “Orders from the admiral?”
He sighed. “You might as well power her down,” he said, referring to the Tribari Starship-Supernova. They’d been waiting in standby, engines ready, for the anticipated communique from Central command. “We’re not going anywhere. Not for a few days, anyway.”
Fal looked confused, but he nodded. “Yessir.”
“And assemble the flight officers for a briefing at oh-nine-hundred.”
This did nothing to alleviate the other man’s confusion, but he nodded again, repeating, “Yessir.”
Elgin sat back in his seat after the other man had gone, rubbing his temples. What in the gods’ names is happening to us? he wondered.
Then, he punched his authorization code into his terminal and brought up the computer interface. He selected the military databanks for Trapper’s Colony, and put in, “immigration log.”
The list went back several years, roughly some fifteen hundred months, back to the founding of the colony. He scrolled through the names and dates. His eye was focused on the “death” column.
There were periods of influx in immigration and death. There’d been a famine about half way through the first year, that had lasted some twelve months. There’d been a cholera outbreak awhile after that. In months of winter, deaths of newborns and young children seemed to outpace any other demographic, except, of course, the elderly. But aside from these outlier periods, the trends seemed consistent.
Until, that is, Governor Halford took over. The first month had seen twelve deaths. The second twenty-three. By month six, there were about fifty deaths or emigrations due to permanent disability a month.
He stared at the screen with a kind of numb horror. He remembered Nees’s question. Who are you defending, Elgin? He thought of the admiral’s words. We need your squadron of fighters on hand.
And he wondered, if Lenksha would ask him to turn his guns on the people of the City, who was he defending after all?
“Let me do that,” Elsa said, coming to her son-in-law’s aid. “You should be sitting, Grel.”
“Thank you, ma’am,” he said, surrendering his glass to her. They were taking a late breakfast on the veranda outside the Aldir mansion.
“Elsa,” she reminded him.
“Elsa,” he nodded. “I’m tired of sitting, though.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she said, handing him a refilled glass of ice water. “You know the doctor’s orders.”
He grinned, if only because of how like Nik she sounded. “I do. I’m going to murder the man, though, if he keeps me bedbound or chair bound another day. I think I need to go for a walk.”
She smiled. “Well, wait until Nik’s home, anyway.”
“You mean, so you’ll have another ally to try to stop me?”
“No,” she protested. “Not just that, anyway.” He laughed. “You shouldn’t go by yourself.”
“I know, I know,” he sighed. “Doctor’s orders.”
“That’s right. Nik would never forgive me if I let you hurt yourself.”
He smiled at that. “They should be back soon, shouldn’t they?” Nikia had had another checkup with Dr. Kel that morning, but she’d left about two hours ago already.
“Yes. But Luk wanted to stop at a few places on the way back, to help her pick out things for the nursery.”
He grew a little quieter at that. “I’m grateful to you, Elsa,” he said in a moment. “Both of you. For looking out for Nik when I couldn’t. And for the baby.”
“Of course, Grel. We’re a family.”
He shook his head. “I never thought I’d hear those words.”
“What do you mean?” She surveyed him with a look that was at once curious and worried.
“Only that you’re a Grand Contributor. I never thought I could sit under the roof of a Grand Contributor. Or that I’d be in one’s debt.” He shook his head again. “Life’s funny, that’s for sure.”
“You weren’t our first choice either,” she reminded him mildly, and with a gentle smile. “But maybe Nik’s smarter than any of us gave her credit for.”
“She is that,” he said, nodding.
“We – Luk and I – should have listened to her a long time ago.”
“Me too.”
“Life’s funny,” she repeated back to him. “That’s for sure.”
He smiled. “Yes, it is, Elsa. Yes, it is.”
Their conversation moved on to other topics, like how Diven, Nik’s brother, would be coming to visit two days hence. “Don’t be offended, Grel, if he’s a little difficult at first. He is by nature, you know.”
“I won’t be,” he said, “though I won’t promise to hold my tongue, either.”
Elsa laughed. “Well, neither will Nik. So he’ll get more trouble than he’s bargained for, if he chooses to be stubborn.”
In awhile, when Nik and Luk still hadn’t returned, she said, “Well, we should probably go in.”
“Oh, no,” he said. “You go. I know you have meetings. You needn’t worry about keeping me entertained, Elsa. I won’t do anything stupid. But I am enjoying the morning.”
She hesitated, then nodded. “Alright. But promise me, if you need anything you’ll ring?”
“I promise.” It was a wholly alien concept to the young man, to ring for assistance for the smallest thing. But he’d try, anyway.
She nodded. “Alright. Then I’ll see you later, Grel.”
He watched her go with a fondness that, despite everything, surprised him. He’d hated Nik’s parents for what they’d done to her. He despised the Grand Contributors in general for what they did to the Tribari.
But the hardest heart could not be blind to Elsa’s motherly love, or Luk’s affectionate protectiveness to Nik. And so here he was, in the home of Grand Contributors, living on the generosity of Grand Contributors; grateful to Grand Contributors; caring about Grand Contributors; seeing a future for himself with these Grand Contributors.
