Love was a funny thing. So far in life, it had hurt me more than anything else. I realized that love was the central point for most pain, a downer way to look at it, but regardless, it ruled our world and certainly mine. When Zach walked away…the pain was nearly intolerable, but at least he wasn’t going to prison. I didn’t understand anything anymore. I was tired of trying. I grabbed the pillow full of Zach’s scent and covered my face, hoping to fall back to sleep.
Chapter one in the final installment of Emma’s story…
Seeing Ryan in a suit wedged between Grant and my dad made me smile. Mom and I sat on the opposite side of the table staring at the oversized stage. The NFL flags draped each wall and served as the backdrop of the podium in the center of the stage. The first round was twenty picks away from being complete. Ryan was starting quarterback his last two years with the Ducks, leading them to two BCS bowl games; and he was projected to go first round. But with the excessive number of QB’s this year, I watched as his never noticeable tics became more noticeable.
“The fourteenth pick in the NFL draft belongs to the Miami Dolphins and they pick tight end, Mannie Long.”
Cheers erupted and flashes flickered throughout the room as he made his way to the stage. Ryan shifted again in his seat as Grant kept patting his back. Their lifelong friendship continued after college. Though they would clearly now be going separate ways. So many things had changed over the past four and a half years.
Zach had kept in touch with me until he somehow found out that Austin and I had actually gone out on a date and he claimed he needed to “Bug out” after that. From what little I could get out of Ryan, who stayed pretty tight lipped as far as Zach was concerned, he graduated from USC with a degree in sports medicine and was attending Stanford University School of Medicine working on his PHD.
Grant was seriously dating Megan, a girl I’d grown to love and who last year spent a lot of the summer with me. Though his legendary blonde locks were much shorter than they used to be, even as an employed accountant at KPMG, he had the look of a surfer in a suit. One year away from his masters, Portland was now his home.
“The fifteenth pick in the NFL draft belongs to the Denver Broncos and they pick offensive tackle, LaDamian Walker.”
Ryan let out a long breath and glanced again at his continuing buzzing phone but not reading anything. I picked it up and scrolled through the messages. Now I really knew how stressed he was because normally he never would have let me touch it. I skimmed over the names, seeing the usual suspects: Connor, Josh, Bret, Seth, Austin, Zach, Madison, Ali and Gabby.
I selected Zach’s message. Dude watching waiting hoping Oakland Raiders are coming up! Booyah
After over four years, my heart still fluttered just reading his words. I scrolled down and read the one before. Safe travels good luck bro. The one before that simply said, How is she. Suddenly the phone was yanked from my hand. I’m not sure what he was being so protective about. Madison? Ali? He and Ali had been broken up nearly as long as Zach and I had been. Madison was the reason. It wasn’t that I didn’t like her but it was because of her that my brother broke up with my best friend. Ali and Ryan were still good friends which I was happy about.
“The sixteenth pick in the NFL draft belongs to the Kansas City Chiefs and they pick quarterback, Ryan Hendricks.”
Our entire table exploded in cheers and the cameras were in front of the table, flashing like strobe lights on a dance floor blinding all of us. Ryan’s smile was wide as Grant hugged him, then my dad, then mom and then me! My brother was going to Kansas City?! Wow…
His phone was blowing up with texts as I watched the guy on stage put a KC hat on him and shake his hand. My brother was ecstatic.
My third year at U of O finally completed, I threw all my stuff in the Rover (the second car I’d inherited from Austin) and headed home to see my family. I hated leaving my apartment now. It was my home away from home.
The 5 was congested and the trip was going to be slow. Only 72 hours had passed since Ryan had become an NFL player and he and mom and dad were busy looking over things, making arrangements and doing interviews. I was still a bit hung up on the how is she text from Zach. I hadn’t heard from him in so long and those three words stirred something inside me. Something that had sat dormant for over four years. Something that I thought was over…in the past. Yet, the agitation. No, that wasn’t the right word. The curiosity? I blew out a long slow breath. I couldn’t put my finger on what it was. But it caused my mind to wander…to think…to question.
My cell phone range from the shotgun seat.
“Hi Mom.”
“Hi honey. I know you’re ready to be home but would you mind stopping at Safeway and grabbing milk and orange juice?”
Really? “OK.” I was ready to crash.
The parking lot was empty which would make it a quick trip in and out. As soon as I went in I spotted Estelle working behind the register. That would delay me a bit because she would ask about absolutely everyone…well…every guy. Self-checkout may have to do. The juice and milk were in the same cooler and when I opened the door, the window fogged over.
“Emma?”
Estelle? When I heard my name, I closed my eyes. This was one encounter I didn’t want to have. I glanced up but the fog on the cooler door blurred the image and I didn’t recognize who had said my name. After grabbing the milk and OJ containers, the door snapped shut. Then I saw her. It only took a short second for the recognition to settle over me. Zach’s mom…
“Mrs. Owens. How are you?”
She smiled and placed her hand over her heart. “I’m ok. How are you sweet girl?”
Suddenly, I found myself in her arms and couldn’t help but look around her to see if she was alone. I hadn’t seen her since Christmas three years ago.
“I’m good.”
“You look beautiful,” she said. And she on the other hand didn’t look so good. I silently prayed she wasn’t ill.
“Thank you. How is Zach?” I asked not just to be polite suddenly I really needed to know.
Her reaction was not what I’d expected. The painful grimace that shot across her face concerned me and for a moment I felt ill. I sat the gallon containers down. She took my hand.
“I assume he’s fine.” She shook her head and inhaled deeply. “He doesn’t come home. He hasn’t been home in over two years. We went there for his graduation but we haven’t seen him since.” Tears pooled in her eyes.
My mouth opened but…nothing. So, I hugged her again. What’s there to say? The clarity of my first week of summer was becoming clear to me. Somewhere between the overwhelming sadness and gripping anger…I knew for the first time in four years, I was probably going to have to either contact Zach Owens or beat the shit out of him. Composure…
“Why? What happened?” This answer…her words…would determine my emotion and my decision. But seeing her this emotionally distraught was not working in his favor.
“Oh Emma. I don’t know. He’s not Zach. He’s withdrawn and he’s angry. I don’t know. He’s pretty much just shut us out altogether.”
DING! DING! DING! Anger it is! That’s perfect. I hadn’t been challenged for a while. I was up for this.
“I’m sorry,” I said softly trying to contain my emotion.
This woman was so good to me. So kind and understanding in a time that I needed her to be. How dare he treat her this way?
She touched my cheek. “This too shall pass, right?” Her attempted smile faltered. “It was so good seeing you. Promise me you’ll stop by and see me this summer some time.”
I nodded. “Absolutely. You can count on it.”
And as she went down an aisle and I picked up the milk and juice, I wanted to shout: you can count on seeing him too!!
Once I was back in my car, I texted his number. It was weird. I wasn’t nervous. I wasn’t anxious. The anger I felt trumped all emotion.
Zach? Send
Nothing….hmmmm… so I called.
Hey. This is Zach You know the drill BEEEEP….
I hung up on his voicemail.
Looks like i was taking a road trip to California.
Finally...One Summer (Just One of the Guys) Page 34
