My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. What was wrong with me?
‘You’re getting withdrawal symptoms,’ Sophie said, catching my fingers and trying to hold them still. It didn’t work.
‘I’m fine.’ I grunted, climbing out of bed.
The cool air met my naked skin as I reached into my drawer. I needed something to wake me up.
‘Do you think they might be right?’
Her voice was soft. I was trying to find the wooden box that held my stash. I stopped fumbling and turned to her. One bare leg stuck out of the cover, drawing my eye to her smooth skin.
‘Do you think they’re right?’
My siblings had bugged me ever since I had got home from hospital. The nagging did my head in. The last thing I needed was Sophie to agree with them.
She didn’t say anything as she chewed on her bottom lip. Shaking my head, I bent down to search the drawer. Where was my box?
‘They took it,’ Sophie whispered.
My muscles ceased to move. The tendons in my thighs burned from my crouched position, but I stayed exactly where I was.
‘What?’ I spat out after I took a deep breath.
‘When you were in hospital, they came in and took your box.’
Launching to my feet, I swiped at everything that sat on top of the dressing table. Aquarius’ deodorant flew onto his bed. Combs scattered to the floor.
I picked up Gemini’s aftershave and smashed it into the wall. Sophie shouted in surprise when the glass shattered and showered to the floor. My breath huffed in and out of me as I looked for more things to destroy. Red dots misted my vision when I couldn’t find anything.
‘Taurus, stop!’ Sophie called.
I ignored her and went to the wooden door that separated me from my meddling siblings. Clenching my fingers, I laid into the door, punching the wood repeatedly. The splinters stung my hand as they sliced into my skin. I kept going.
How dare they? My brain was buzzing as the red mist took over. I couldn’t stop.
I was aware that Sophie cowered somewhere behind me.
‘No one takes my stash!’ I bellowed, pulling my arm back and pounding the wood one last time. The crack of the door vibrated through my head and brought me back to the room.
The silence was broken by the sound of my laboured breathing. Sophie whimpered in the corner. I couldn’t look at her. My arm throbbed from the beating.
‘You’re bleeding.’ Her voice was small. I glanced at my hand. She was right. Blood seeped from the grazes on my knuckles.
‘You don’t want to be involved with someone like me,’ I said through clenched teeth as I pulled on my jogging bottoms.
‘Don’t shut me out.’ Sophie got up from the bed when I reached for my sleeveless shirt.
I spun away from her when she reached out to me. Yanking the door open, I growled when I ran into Aries.
‘What the—’
‘Leave it out,’ I snapped, ducking back into the room to collect my wallet.
‘Sophie, are you okay?’
My brother’s heroism caused a problem. He was the perfect womaniser but managed to get away with it because he was charming. His protective streak was something that the rest of the family found admirable. I found it irritating. He thought he was so much better than us.
‘I’m fine,’ I heard her reply as I made an escape out of the house.
The busy street did nothing to divert my attention. I needed two things. A drink and a joint. A hit of coke would also make me feel a lot better. I only had one line of coke a week. It wasn’t too much to worry about.
‘Taurus!’
The shout from behind told me that I was being followed. Sophie caught up to me and tried to pull on my arm. I stopped walking, waiting for the onslaught. She placed herself in front of me and put her hands on my shoulders.
‘I want to help you.’
Her words made my bubbling temper rise again. I managed to push it down, resisting the urge to tell her where to go. Her pretty eyes pleaded with me, making me want to poke them out.
‘I don’t need any help,’ I said, shrugging my shoulders so her hands fell away.
The frown on her face didn’t make me feel bad. If she wanted a clean cut man, I wasn’t the one for her. I liked to take drugs every now and then. What was the harm in that? If she couldn’t handle that, she had to go.
‘This is who I am. You either accept that, or…’
She cringed at the unspoken words. We didn’t know each other, yet I was giving her an ultimatum. We had spent a great week together. Could I be bothered with taking it any further?
‘I like you. I know we haven’t known each other long, but I really like you.’
She shrugged, the disappointment leaving her face. I sighed, looking away from her intense gaze.
‘Well, I think you’re gorgeous.’ A small smile played on her lips.
‘And you’re good in bed.’
Her smile grew even bigger, which made me start to feel better.
‘You’re crap at sports.’ She hit me playfully on the arm.
‘But your sexy arse wiggles when you run.’
‘Taurus!’
‘And when you sleep, you look like an old man, although that would insult old men.’
Her mouth dropped open. ‘You can’t say that!’
‘I just did.’ I laughed at her shocked expression.
The shake of her head was contradicted by the smile on her face. She liked me.
‘I knew you liked me anyway,’ I said, starting to walk.
She linked her arm through mine. ‘How?’
‘Because I’m sexy. Who wouldn’t want to jump on me?’
I side stepped as she thrust her weight against me. I had no idea what she was trying to do so I pushed her playfully.
‘You’re a funny one. Where are we going?’ she asked, taking hold of my hand.
I was pleased she had accepted me. I sometimes lost my temper. I sometimes did drugs. I liked a drink, but I was a nice man. She probably deserved someone that had something going for them. I wasn’t going to push her away when she so obviously wanted me, though.
‘To replace my stash.’
Her step faltered. Looking down at her, I raised my eyebrows. ‘You okay with that?’
I couldn’t disguise the shaking of my hands, even to myself. It would disappear once I had a drink or a smoke.
‘Yeah, it’s fine.’ She reached up and fingered the stubble on my cheek. ‘No drugs makes Taurus a grumpy bum,’ she whispered.
We moved on. Her words ran through my mind as I led her to my dealer’s home. I couldn’t see what the big deal was. Lots of people drunk alcohol. Many people smoked cannabis. Some people sometimes did heavier stuff. What was the crime in making myself feel better?
Chapter Eight
‘Father, I have something to tell you,’ Aries announced.
The kitchen went silent as he stood up and handed Father his phone. I caught sight of the picture of Aries and Natalie. I sipped my glass of water, ignoring the shake of my hand.
‘Is that your twin flame?’
Father rose from his chair at the head of the table and stared at my brother. The hero. The one that everyone assumed would get things done. No one looked at me the way they admired him now.
‘Yep, I found her. In fact, I’ve known her for quite some time,’ Aries replied. His cocky grin made me cringe.
Thrusting my chair away from the table, I got to my feet.
‘Are you okay?’ Gemini asked as I turned away from the gloating man that now held everyone’s attention.
It was time to meet Sophie. She would be waiting at the pub.
‘Before you go, I have the number of a good drug therapist.’ Gemini handed me a card.
My cheeks heated when the tremble of my hand revealed that I needed help.
What was so wrong with smoking cannabis? It wasn’t harmful.
‘Thanks,’ I mumbled.
Gemini was lucky I didn’
t punch him. For a second, I had been tempted to throw my fist into his clean shaven jaw. I didn’t need help from anyone.
My phone beeped, so I slipped out of the house.
‘Taurus!’
The hiss of a male voice brought my attention to the alleyway next to our home. The sun was sinking, so the shadows hid his face. I stepped forward but didn’t enter the alley. I wasn’t going to put myself in danger for no reason. Not that I was scared.
‘Did you give my note to Cancer?’
His face became clear as he moved on his feet. Why was the man so interested in her? He was married and he worked for Nick.
‘What do you want?’
Matt. That’s what Cancer had called him. The foggy memory surfaced as I watched him. His dark eyes searched the area around us.
‘I need to see her.’
I lifted my arm, tempted to bring the sun higher in the sky so that I could see his face better. Aries would have either killed him or taken him hostage by now. Instead, I stood there with my shaking arm lifted in the air, doing nothing.
‘Can you help us?’
His voice was small and pathetic. What was it with men falling prey to women? I had never understood it. No woman would ever reduce me to a quivering wreck. Only drugs did that to me. Clenching my hand, I let my arm fall to my side.
‘No, go away,’ I said, turning towards the pub.
His footsteps followed me. They tapped lightly on the pavement as I pulled my cap low and made my way to meet Sophie.
‘I see you’ve met someone new,’ Matt said, drawing level with me.
I tucked my chin into the top of my hoody and ignored him.
‘Nick has asked me to spy on you. He thinks that you could meet your twin flame soon.’
‘You really believe in that crap?’ I stopped and turned towards the man that was clad in black. ‘It’s a load of rubbish. Tell Nick that he doesn’t need to worry about me.’
Matt chuckled in my face. His breath stank of stale alcohol. It made me cringe away from him. Was that how I smelt after a heavy night?
‘Good old Taurus, straight to the point.’
Rolling my eyes, I carried on walking. If he was going to do anything to me, he would have done it by now. I wasn’t afraid anyway. Nick could kidnap me. He could kill me. I really didn’t care.
‘I need you to arrange a meeting with Cancer for me. Nick is getting worried. He is majorly pissed off that you managed to rescue your guardian.’
‘Does it look like I give a monkeys?’ I hissed, spinning to him. ‘I just want to get on with my life. Now, leave me alone.’
Matt tutted as he shook his head and crossed his arms. His hair was darker in the fading light. His pale skin showed the expression of pity on his face.
‘You’re so lost, aren’t you? Trying to feel better by drowning your sorrows won’t help.’
The growl that erupted from my throat surprised both of us. Reaching out, I buried my hand in his jumper and lifted him from the ground. His feet dangled, but he didn’t say a word. The movement of his throat was the only indication that he was nervous.
‘Tell Nick to bring it on. Whatever problem he has with me, bring it directly to me. He needs to stop being a coward by threatening the other people in our relationships.’
Matt laughed. I tightened my grip, pulled my head back and head-butted him. It had the desired effect.
‘That hurt!’ he exclaimed.
Dropping him, I left him where he landed.
‘Wait! If I arrange a meeting between you and Nick, will you help me with Cancer?’
His puny voice was grating on my nerves. Why would I want to see Nick?
‘He can make life easier, you know that, don’t you?’
His words made my feet slow down. How could Nick make life easier? All my life I felt unwanted. People didn’t want to interact with me. They always saw me as the loser. The man that wouldn’t amount to anything.
‘I don’t need any help,’ I replied.
His hand touched my arm. It sent me into overdrive. Grabbing him by the throat, I spun and thrust him against the brick wall of a house that was in darkness.
‘What do you want?’
Spit flew from my lips and landed on his face. He flinched away from me but couldn’t move.
‘I need to see Cancer. Nick always says that he wishes he could get hold of you. He says that he could make things easier for you.’
My breath was heavy as I loosened my grip slightly. His face started to go red where I pressed my forearm against his throat.
‘How can he make things easier for me?’
Despite myself, I was intrigued. I had no idea what made me take drugs. I didn’t know why I drowned myself in fake highs.
‘He can unlock your memories. You don’t believe all that you’ve been told by your guardians. If you allow him to unlock your memories, you’ll know the truth for yourself.’
I released him and stepped back. He slouched against the wall, rubbing his neck as he tried to get his breath back.
What memories did he mean? I remembered everything that had happened to me.
‘I’m ten years older than you. I’ve been with Nick my whole life. My father served him, so I followed. I know everything about you. Even what you went through before you came here,’ Matt said, blinking when his phone started to ring.
‘There’s no such thing as reincarnation. We got here through evolution. Are you going to get that?’
He shook his head, leaving his phone in his pocket.
I was right. He was wrong. No matter what anyone said, I would never be swayed to believe in something I couldn’t see. Debating the facts was one of my favourite pastimes. Maybe I should meet Nick. I could tell him to go and live a normal life. As soon as he realised that there was nothing to stress about, maybe he would leave us alone.
‘Okay, I’ll meet him,’ I said.
Matt’s eyes widened a fraction. He had obviously believed that I wouldn’t budge. It was unusual for me to agree to do anything someone else asked, but I wanted to put a stop to the stupid threat.
‘Will you set up a meeting with Cancer?’
He clasped his hands together in front of him. He was a bit smaller than me with broad shoulders. Why was a tough man that worked for the Dysfunctionals brought to his knees by a girl like Cancer?
‘If I have to,’ I replied, jumping when my own phone started to ring.
Digging it out of my pocket, I answered it straight away.
‘Hello.’ I greeted my new woman.
‘Where are you? I can’t believe you’re late. If you hurry up, I won’t down your drink.’ Her giggle made me smile.
‘I’m two minutes away. Save it for me.’
I started to walk away from Matt as the sound of her voice lured me towards her. ‘You’ve been a naughty boy,’ she whispered into the phone.
‘Taurus!’
Matt’s interruption brought me back to the present.
‘Hold on, Sophie, I’ll be right there.’
I pressed the button on the phone and turned back to the man that was starting to get on my nerves. The pub door was in sight, which meant my cool lager was getting warm.
‘Meet me by Big Ben tomorrow lunchtime. I’ll bring Cancer. Then we’ll arrange the meeting with Nick.’
He nodded once before disappearing into the shadows. I stood rooted to the spot on the pavement. What had I agreed to? I should have told him to get lost. A part of me wondered though. Matt said that Nick wanted to help me. How would he help me? I didn’t even know what I needed help with.
I wiped my hand over my face, scratching my palm on the stubble. The joint in the back pocket of my jeans screamed at me to light it. If I had just one drag before I went in to see Sophie, it might stop the shaking. I could have done with another pill to make me feel better. Before I thought too much about it, I dug the joint out and sparked it up. My siblings had gone mad at me when I had got back from hospital. They didn’t need to worry a
bout me. I only smoked something occasionally. I had no idea why they were so interested.
Chapter Nine
‘We think you need to go to rehab.’
Pisces stood in front of everyone. Eleven of them stood in the middle of the living room, looking down at me as I sat on the sofa. My fists clenched into balls as I watched their self-righteous shuffling. Had they pulled straws to see who would tell me that I needed help?
‘Why do you think that?’ The words pushed through my teeth.
Pisces avoided looking me in the eye by glancing behind her. There were no partners in the room, and thankfully, Sophie was at work. When I had seen her the night before, she had calmed me. We had spent the evening drinking and laughing. She had made me forget everything.
‘You drink a lot. You smoke weed and recently, you’ve been taking heavier drugs.’
Even Aries was less cocky than his usual self. It must have been serious.
‘I’m fine. I don’t smoke or drink any more than the average person who smokes and drinks.’ My denial was met with plenty of raised eyebrows. Even the normally jovial Leo was straight faced.
‘Would you consider going to rehab? Father said he would pay for a private—’
‘Stop!’ I jumped up from my seat. ‘Leave me alone. I don’t have a drug problem, and even if I did, it’s none of your business.’
Going to walk past them, I paused when I saw Cancer hovering on the edge of the group. She looked torn as I gestured with my head for her to follow me. The others were silent as we left the room.
‘Taurus, they’re only trying to help. You—’
‘Shut up,’ I interrupted, leading her through the kitchen and out the front door.
‘I have to get to work,’ she said as I strode away from her.
I froze on the pavement. Only last night, her lover boy had made me stop still with his words. Why was I doing everyone else’s bidding? Biting on the side of my mouth, I resisted the urge to tell them all to piss off. I wanted to storm back into the house and tear it down. What would they do if I ripped apart their precious home?
‘Matt wants to see you.’
The gasp travelled to me, followed by the sound of her light footsteps.
‘You’ve seen him?’ she asked as she stood in front of me.
[Zodiac Twin Flames 01.0 - 03.0] Boxed Set Page 35
