by Jack Crosby
“That is exactly what I’m saying.”
“Man, Tanaka Corp really did a number on this game.”
She tittered in my ear, a bit too sarcastically. “If you only knew everything, which you will one day soon.”
I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to be amused or agitated. I think I was both actually. If she knew everything, why in the world wouldn’t she just tell me? “Can we knock off the games and just get to the part where you enlighten me?”
There was a long pause. As I was waiting for her to make up her mind, I started walking in deeper to this hidden abyss. Ira’s warning about monsters and the Old One made me tread carefully. My guns were out and Heart of the Oracle was of course activated. So far though, nothing to worry about.
Baba’s sudden reappearance in my mind startled me. “I can’t tell you and for that I apologize.”
“Fuck me!” I exclaimed. “Give a man some warning before you just pop back in like that.”
It was clear she was struggling with keeping the secrets of all of this from me. “I wish I could tell you everything, but that would change the outcome. The only way to succeed is through self-discovery – you need to be able to put it all together and make the right choice free of influence.”
“So everything isn’t set in stone?”
“No.” Then she backed away again, leaving me to my own thoughts.
It was hard not to be distracted because the conversation was so deep. There was so much happening that I didn’t even realize, let alone the world that was captivated by the release of this unbeatable game. And when you are in a catacomb type dungeon, being distracted can lead to your death. Fortunately Baba wasn’t about to let that happen. “Vector, to your right!”
I turned with the Nemesis gun held up and blasted the ghoul type monster that was quickly approaching. It took three blasts in total to put him down; he’d almost made it to me. “Thanks Baba.”
“I know we’ve talked about quite a bit, trust me I know the ramifications of everything better than everyone.” I heard an admonishment coming. “You need to be focused at the task at hand. You will have plenty of time to fret over what is to come after you face the Old One and win the Typhon.”
“Can you give me any hints about the Old One?”
“He’s from the time before, forgotten and bitter. Don’t let looks deceive you; he’s one of the toughest bosses in the game.”
Baba didn’t seem to give out warnings willy-nilly. With that in mind, I began to pay more attention to the surroundings down here and less to the ideas that had been creeping into my mind. Like she said, I had plenty of time to put together the pieces later. Maybe she would spill more beans if I seduced her, tricked her into allowing me to give her a few whacks across that amazing ass…
“Having sex with me won’t get you anymore answers.” Damnit, she was in my head and sex wouldn’t work. “I am disconnecting our conversation for the time being, to conserve strength. When you reach the Old One’s antechamber, I will reconnect.”
“Sounds good.” And just like that, I was back alone. That was a big help, believe it or not, as I was able to focus on important stuff like staying alive and killing weird ghoul-like monsters. The further in I went, the more of them that popped out. Still, I made it to what I thought was the Old One’s antechamber with little damage and most of my sense intact.
Baba reconnected, just as she said she would. “You are almost there – though what you are about to face will be your stiffest challenge of the game to this point.”
“Was that an innuendo?”
“Focus!” Her voice changed to a sharp chirp to get me to knock off the jokes. “I’ve decided to break a rule, why I do not know.” Hell, I’d take it! “Before you enter his chamber, let me tell you about the Old One.”
Hidden Boss: The Old One
“Let me get this straight? The Old One is the main character from the original game that was produced over twenty years ago?”
She cleared her throat, as she had been talking for a bit. “Twenty years ago, the game you know as The Electric Mile was released as Neon Death Race. It never received the reception or popularity that the new and improved remake has.”
I considered myself sort of a video game historian and I’d never heard of this game. Granted, it sounded like it came out a year before I was born, but still. The Electric Mile was such a revolutionary game (even before I found out everything from the inside) that it was hard to imagine the original being a flop. “So is this Old One bitter about not being included?”
“No, he’s angry that he’s been forgotten. His game laid the groundwork for this new one. The fact he’s a file in a secret side quest that only one person can access is a slap in the face. He’s not going to like you.”
Great.
“So how do you know so much about this cat?”
“I was the leading lady in that game, before I was redesigned as the wasteland witch.”
Well fuck me running. “Can’t say I expected to hear that.” Talk about a plot twist. “How do you feel about your redesign?”
There was silence and then a sigh. “Going from the starring role to the mysterious witch wasn’t grand, but with the new role comes power. I’ve come to love that power.”
Her voice echoed that sentiment. Still she’d given me a lot of useful information and a back history to the game I didn’t even know about. It was time to put that knowledge to good use and go confront the Old One. Taking my gun out of my holster, “I guess it’s time to go introduce myself.”
“Good luck; as I said, don’t underestimate him. He’s incredibly powerful.”
Baba’s connection broke, leaving me once again by myself. That was okay, if I couldn’t take down the Old One, I had no business trying to be the hero of the story.
Steeling myself, I went up to the far door and readied myself to face the Old One. I tried to open the door, but it didn’t budge. That was unexpected. I tried again to the same result. Annoyed, I kicked the door, but all that did was injure my toes.
There was a slot on the door, it looked like something thin was supposed to be slid in to unlock it. Then I remembered something important – the dagger the Oracle gave me was also a key to a side quest! Could this be the spot it was needed?
I inserted the dagger into the door and hoped for the best. When the entire blade was in up to the hilt, the door popped open. I pulled the dagger out and opened the door successfully. Phew, that would’ve been bad if I hadn’t remembered!
I had no expectations of this guy, except that he’d be old – hence the name the Old One. When he turned around and he came off as about my age, that got me off my game for a second. Then he opened his mouth and spoke, “Welcome to my home. I’ve been expecting you.”
If the son of a bitch didn’t sound just like me. “How’s that possible?”
“Don’t ask me questions, Ash Wilde. I’m just a digital program put together to challenge you. I know nothing.”
Bitter, party of one, your table’s now ready. Man, the hostility coming off this dude’s voice was like little sucker punches. “I think you know more than you’re letting on.”
“If anyone cared about what I knew, I wouldn’t be here waiting for only you to arrive.”
I did feel kind of bad for him. “Why me? What’s so special you’ve been placed here to challenge me?”
He took a step or two towards me, but not in an attack sort of movement. “Why do we look and sound the same? These are questions only the makers of the games can answer.”
So was it Zeus Industries that was behind the problems of a digital level or was it Tanaka Corp pulling the strings from the real world? Man, my head started spinning. “I can help us then. Give me the Typhon motorcycle and help me get past the Electric Mile race with Draxler.”
“Help you?” He sounded confused. “Maybe I’ve been put here to replace you. Yes,” he started to get excited. “That’s it – I kill you and I can take your place as the hero. The
place I should’ve never lost in the first place.”
“Whoa man, chill.” Not that saying that ever worked. “There’s no reason to kill anyone today.”
He pulled out one bad ass looking gun. I couldn’t read what was engraved on the handle, but it was damn impressive. “Yes, there are plenty of reasons to kill you. Plus I know she’s helping you.” He spit on the ground. “Yes help him and leave me to rot!”
He was obviously talking about Baba. “Put the gun down and we can hash this out, the three of us.”
“No, after I rid the world of you, I’ll rid the world of her meddling ways, too.” The fire burning within my doppelgänger was burning bright. “Ash, you came into this world to do the job that was meant for me. I’m sorry, but I cannot allow you to live.” He fired off two shots at me.
I ducked out of the way and ran for my life to the far end, away from the Old One. He laughed as he lined up some more pot shots, enjoying the chase. It seemed he really was a mirrored version of me. That made little sense. But what did make sense was every good video game had a mirror image boss battle where your strengths were negated. I couldn’t think of this as any more than that.
Part of me wondered how he’d fare in hand to hand combat. If this was truly a mirror match that the game somehow (and that was another topic to have a long, hard discussion about later), then he would suffer from the same weaknesses. I pulled out the Oracle’s dagger and waited for the right opportunity.
That came when his gun overheated. I’d been slowly working my way in closer, so it was a one-two pounce and I tackled him. His gun went flying and the two of us were tussling on the ground. I got in a solid punch to the face which seemed to stun him. Was my chin really that weak?
As he stumbled back, I followed up with a kick to the gut. The Old One fell down, away from me. I pushed myself up and jumped again, landing some good old fashioned haymakers. I was tempted to use the knife, but using it on someone who looks like you is a lot harder than you’d realized. It was even tough to see the asshole leak blood from the corners of his mouth as I unloaded on him. I didn’t even care about his life gauge, as I figured each blow took away a chunk of it.
I quickly exhausted myself before I defeated him. The Old One took advantage and socked me one good across the jaw. I saw stars as I twisted myself around and fell down very unceremoniously. From there it was a scramble for each of us to get to our guns first. Both of us lifted our respective firearms at the same time, resulting in a two man Mexican standoff.
“You’re scrappy, I’ll give you that,” he said, trying to be polite I guess. “Still, even with your best effort, I am still standing and have the advantage.
It looked like a draw to me. “I think we’re both in a position of power. There’s no need to continue this nonsense.”
“Is Baba there, talking to you?” She wasn’t, I was on my own. “If she is, tell her she chose the wrong champion. Only I can bring down Zeus and through them Tanaka.”
“Tanaka, the company that made this game?”
“Yes Ash, it’s all connected. It is a shame you’ll not see this through.” He fired again at me and I waited for my life to end. Whether it was fate or maybe poor eyesight from the beating I gave him, the bolt missed my head and hit the dirt beside me.
With nothing else to do, I pulled the trigger on my gun. The bolt hit him in the chest and threw him back again. His life bar had indeed been depleted. I ran over to him, shocked at how the battle ended so quickly. Fuck! “I didn’t mean to kill you!”
“I know, that’s why I had to give you reason to. Little bastard,” he choked a bit, “wouldn’t even get pissed off when I was taunting you.”
He was fading fast. “You meant for me to kill you?”
“I’m a boss in the game, so I had to fight you. What no one knew was I’ve been rooting for you this entire time. With me gone, there’s nothing left to stop you from finally beating this game.” A key fell from his pocket. “Take it, that’s the Typhon motorcycle, whether you wish to believe it.” He coughed again. “To activate it, just drop it on the ground and it’ll transform.”
I picked it up and it felt much heavier than the silver key it looked like. “I’m so confused. There’s just way too much happening all at once.”
“You’re close, kid, real close. I wish you would’ve had the chance to play me in my prime.” He reached up and tugged my shirt down closer. “If you ever find a copy of Neon Death Race, you best get it and see what I can really do.”
His smile began to fade. “Old One, you can’t die yet…”
“Sure I can. I’ve had a good run. And stop calling me Old One… I’m the original Vector.” And with that, his eyes closed and he passed on to the digital afterlife. The silence was broken with another achievement earned and with it one hundred gamer points.
This one was a bit bittersweet though – ‘The Last Vector.’
**Cutscene**
This was really odd. Had I taken a wrong turn somewhere? The last thing that happened was the previous Vector died and passed his title along to me. I figured I’d be back with Baba with the objective complete, but I wasn’t. I was in a pretty unremarkable room.
“Ash, is that you?”
Where could a voice possibly be coming from? “Who's there?”
Out of the shadows, it was a beautiful blonde woman. I instantly recognized her as Ira. “Oh my God, you’re alive!” I rushed over and pulled her in tightly, so glad she was okay. “I thought you were dead when you left the oculus as an ally.”
“It’s true, you don’t remember.” Remember what? “We don’t have time. Chances are you won’t remember this encounter, either.”
“Ira, what’s going on?”
She grabbed my hand and placed it between her breasts. My lord, I forgot how pillowy soft those orbs of magic were. “In order for us to be free, you must defeat her.”
Her? Wasn’t Draxler a dude? “Ira, nothing you’re saying is making much sense.”
She shook her head, irritated. “These brief moments we share, as fleeting as they are, I needed to see you again, just in case.”
Worry began to build up in my throat. “After I defeat Draxler, I’ll come find you, that’s a promise.”
“Sweet, loving Ash. Worry not about me; please care for yourself.”
So much of this entire encounter made no sense. She was talking as if this had happened before. Wait a minute, this had happened before!
Everything went fuzzy. I felt dizzy for a second. Whatever just happened, the memory was gone. Ira was still standing there, looking a bit upset. “I’m sorry Ash, I wish I could explain more, but that’s just not the way it works. The program is putting up firewalls.”
My hand was still between her boobs, but her one hand was on me. Strike that, it was stroking me. “This is a little something to remember me by.”
I closed my eyes as she worked my hard-on with her experienced hand. Ira stopped here and there to give extra special attention to the nerve clusters right around the head. When she brought me to the brink, she slowed up, extending the experience out as long as she could.
My head was buried in her shoulders, overcome with such a feeling that it made me weak in the knees. Being with her made me weak in the knees. “Ira, you’re the one, aren’t you?”
“Yes.” And with a flourish, she sped up once again, this time taking me past the point of holding back and allowing me the pleasure to finish. Her hand caught it all, not letting the slightest drop fall to the floor.
“You won’t remember this, and I doubt I’ll be able to find you again, at least not she’s defeated.”
Huffing and puffing, “I wish you could tell me more.”
“As do I, Ash. Just know you stole my heart the first time you entered my office. You are my salvation.”
****
I opened my eyes to see the Old One’s lair, with O.G. Vector still lying dead in the middle of the room. My heart was racing and I felt all clammy. What the hell? F
or the second time, it seemed like I lost a memory in this damn place. Maybe I’d been inside a video game for too long. That had to be it; a sense of urgency came to me.
“Ash man,” I told myself, “you need to beat Draxler before you go completely fucking bonkers.”
Mission: Closing Time
There was the click-clack of heels on the ground. “Baba…”
“Well I didn’t really expect Vector to give up so easily, but he must’ve seen something in you. Probably the same thing I see.”
My oculus was making noises and there was loot to be had, I just wasn’t in the mood to do anything about either. “I need the truth. It can’t be a coincidence that he looked like me, sounded like me even, and carried the same name as my fucking gamer handle.”
She knelt down beside me and placed a hand on my shoulder. “It’s no coincidence, that I can tell you. What no one truly understands is how Tanaka Corp is connected to you. The magic that brought you here works in strange ways.”
I’d agree with that. “I need to get inside and find out. All of this, it just makes no sense.”
She helped me to my feet. “And you’re close, so very close. Have you collected your prize yet?”
Pulling the key out of my pocket, “He told me this was the Typhon motorcycle. I have no idea what that meant.”
“I will show you later, but you are missing the biggest prize of them all.” She pointed over to Vector’s body. “Amongst the spoils you will find something destined for you.”
I did a little digging and found a silver ring shining up at me. I picked it up and put it on my right ring finger. It fit perfectly. “What is this?”
“That is yet another Easter Egg, the Velocity Ring.” She said it like it meant a whole bunch. “With it, the rider of the Typhon motorcycle unlocks the boost function. No boost, no beating Draxler.”