by Ally James
It wasn’t his fault, but he still felt guilty for not meeting her at the airport. “If I’d had any inkling that you were coming, I’d have been there to meet you.”
“It was quite an experience,” she admitted. “You might get some funny looks when you go back to work. The guard was nice, but there was no way he was letting me in that gate.”
And the surprises just keep coming. “You went to the base?”
“Not the brightest decision,” she acknowledged. “Naturally they weren’t going to take my word for anything.”
He shook his head. He was surprised word hadn’t gotten back to him yet. He knew what the security forces who guarded the entrance would be thinking. “It was nothing against you, but we’ve had women show up looking for some of the guys—for various reasons. So even if there weren’t strict regulations in place, you still wouldn’t have been allowed in unless I made arrangements ahead of time. And they know to never give information out.”
“Yeah, my cab driver pointed that out. In case you’re wondering, Maxi is his aunt. That’s how I ended up there. He said that either she’d know you or one of her friends would. When you didn’t answer your phone, though, she thought you might be at work. So she came up with the idea of leaving you the message and having you come there. I’m sorry for that. You probably didn’t know what to think. If I hadn’t been so tired and overwhelmed, I’d have gone about it differently.”
He felt himself relaxing, as if her voice had lulled him into a kind of trance. He was drawn to her, as he’d always been. He knew it wasn’t rational, but his reaction to her—or weakness where she was concerned—pissed him off. He couldn’t afford to lower his guard. He gave her credit for keeping her word to come, but that didn’t change her dishonesty. She hurt him more than he was willing to admit. And with her there in the flesh, the fallout would be much worse should he discover she was playing games. I won’t be a fool again. She yawned, and he took the opportunity it presented for a quiet ride back to his house. “Why don’t you lay your head back and rest. I’ll wake you when we get there.” He wondered if he sounded as stressed as he was beginning to feel.
Maybe she picked up on it. Because she shifted, as if getting comfortable. “I think I’ll do that. Being this tired and seeing all the snow around us has me feeling disoriented. Plus, it’s always made me nervous to travel in snowy conditions.” After growing up near Boston, and dealing with this type of weather in a few places he’d been stationed, he didn’t give it much thought. But he knew that the states with heavy snow in winter had the equipment on hand to deal with it quickly. The South didn’t see a significant enough amount to invest in a lot of expensive snow plows.
“That’ll happen until you adjust to it,” he replied. He wished he’d kept that comment to himself, as it sounded for all the world like he expected her to stay. But when he heard a soft snore, he figured she’d likely missed it. Now that he’d gotten what he wanted, he found that he missed hearing her talk. After all, they’d spent hours on their computers together daily for seven months. To say it had been tough without her would be an understatement. A part of him was downright giddy to have her here, but the rational side was freaking out. How was he going to survive her physical presence when he hadn’t been able to resist her via e-mail? When he paused at a yield sign, he chanced a look at her. A nearby streetlight illuminated the interior of the truck, allowing him to make out her features. She was so beautiful. The fact that her mouth was hanging open slightly only made her more so. As he turned back to the road, the only thought that kept running through his head on an endless loop was I’m so screwed. Because how could he possibly guard his heart from someone who already owned it?
* * *
• • •
Sara woke again with a start. This is beginning to be a bad habit. Gabe stood a few feet away, obviously having disturbed her slumber when he opened the truck door. Gabe? I’m dreaming. She reached out and touched his arm. Feels so real. Then she squeezed it. Weird, it’s never been like this before. She was debating exploring further when he said, “Um . . . your fingernails are kind of sharp.”
Then it all came back to her. “Wait—you’re here. You’re real. And . . . I’m me.” Okay, that last part made no sense, but she was disoriented from the nap, and she couldn’t seem to stop the flow of words that were tumbling out.
“Technically you’re here. And I’m Gabe.” She thought she detected a hint of amusement in his voice when he added, “We all clear now?”
“Is this where you live?” she asked, noticing they appeared to be in a garage. Or a basement. He is kind of a stranger. She discounted that notion immediately. She might not be the best judge of character, but she’d stake her life on him being a good man. That’s exactly what you’ve done.
He helped her out, and she shivered as the cold air hit her. “We need to go around front. Trouble is kenneled in the kitchen, and if we walk through that way, he’ll lose his shit. He’s not used to a lot of company, so he’ll be excited. Better to bring him to you.”
She buttoned her coat and dug the hat she brought with her out of her handbag. “All ready.”
He put his hand in the small of her back and led her slowly down the drive and to a connecting pathway. “Be careful. I have someone who keeps the main areas clear, but they’re probably still slick in spots.” The floodlight at the corner of his house was on, giving her a view of the exterior. It was a log cabin with large picture windows and a porch running the entire length. She couldn’t tell much about the yard since it was blanketed in white stuff, but she didn’t see any lights indicating nearby neighbors. They climbed two steps and he moved forward to deal with the lock. The door swung open and he waved a hand for her to go inside. There was a light on in the entryway—and that’s as far as she got before she jumped backward in fright. She heard Gabe’s shout a split second before something knocked her off balance and she went crashing into what she suspected were the shrubs. “Trouble! Shit, Sara.” He sounded alarmed, and she would have put his mind at ease, if not for the tongue licking her face. If she opened her mouth—yeah, that wasn’t happening. Suddenly, the dog was gone and he was there. “Are you all right?” Her coat kept the branches from doing anything other than scratching her hands and the back of her neck. No, the only serious injury seemed to be the one to her pride. She could only imagine how she must look right now. If his face was any indication, it was pretty damn bad.
“I—I’m okay,” she mumbled as she struggled to sit up without embarrassing herself further.
“Hang on,” he instructed as he put his arms under her body and lifted her against his chest. “I’m so sorry. That must have scared the hell out of you. I should have checked before letting you go in. Sometimes Trouble manages to escape the kitchen. It doesn’t happen often, but every once in a while, he gets lucky—and lives up to his name,” he chided as he gently moved back toward the doorway with her. The dog in question was sitting a few inches inside looking sheepish. He whined as if to say, Whoops, my bad.
“S’okay.” She shivered as the moisture began to seep through her clothing. She’d gone from cold to freezing in the blink of an eye.
“We need to get you warmed up.” She had no idea where he was taking her, but she was on board if it would stop her teeth from chattering. What must he be thinking? He reached out to flip on a light, then lowered her to her feet. He kept a grip on her waist, though, for support. “Why don’t you take a hot shower while I fix you something to drink? You should find everything you need in the cabinet over there.” When she nodded, he added, “Call out if you need me.”
When he was gone, Sara closed the door and leaned back against it. What a disaster this had been so far. Seeing Gabe again was amazing—and being with him felt oddly right. Yet she had sensed him shutting down during the drive home. She’d been enjoying their conversation, and thought he had been as well, until he abruptly suggested she get so
me rest. There was something in his tone that alerted her to the fact that he needed space. She had been tired and had fallen asleep again easily, but she would have preferred to have continued talking to him. The bond was still there but was in need of repair, and she wasn’t sure how to go about it unless he was willing to help her. What did you expect? Give him time to adjust. But how long could this go on before he expected her to go home? They’d never really discussed the length of her stay. The return date on the ticket was open ended, but he hadn’t asked her to move in with him. She nearly jumped out of her skin when a knock sounded. “Everything all right?”
She placed a hand over her heart, trying to catch her breath. She’d taken years off her life today with all the shocks to her system. “Um—yeah. I’m good. Just . . . using the toilet.” She slapped a hand over her mouth. She’d blurted out the first thing that came to mind. And considering the water wasn’t running in the shower, that didn’t leave many options. Oh my God, he thinks I’m pooping.
It may have been her imagination, but she could have sworn there was laughter in his voice when he said, “Oh . . . just checking on you. I’m leaving your suitcase outside the door so you can put on some dry clothes. Well . . . I’m going back to the kitchen now.”
She dropped her head back in embarrassment. He’d actually been stumbling over his words at the end. She might as well have told him she had her period. It would probably have the same effect. I need to keep my mouth shut and go to bed. She tended to say the wrong things when she was nervous, and the jet lag was making it even worse. She was practically a loaded gun at this point. Get in the shower before he comes back. Peeling off the soggy denim turned out to be the biggest challenge. She hadn’t realized how cold she was until the warm water hit her body. She put her head back and let the stress of the day wash away. She would no doubt revisit everything that had happened in the last twelve hours later, but for now, she would focus on nothing more than embracing the new beginning she had undertaken.
Chapter Eighteen
Gabe was still smiling when he walked back into the kitchen and pulled a saucepan out of one of the cabinets. He was fairly certain she hadn’t intended to blurt out that she was on the toilet. He could sense her mortification. He thought it was more likely she’d been using the time and space to collect herself just as he was. He knew she must be overwhelmed after the day she’d had, as who wouldn’t be unsettled by it. He’d certainly been rattled in North Carolina from his visit. Although that had possibly been a bigger train wreck. They had both taken a chance by dropping in unannounced, and neither had been a smooth experience.
As wary as he was, he couldn’t help being impressed by her courage. It had been daunting for him, and he was used to being in places and situations that were damned uncomfortable and dangerous. But from what he’d learned, she lived a fairly sheltered existence. He also knew that she was shy and appeared to have a tough time with confidence. He’d been surprised when she agreed to the trip in the first place, but for her to come here after all that had happened, especially not knowing what kind of welcome she’d receive—it had taken guts. Or it was part of some master plan. One of the worst things to come from this whole mess was how badly his trust had been shaken. Even though they’d never met, he had grown to believe in her and everything she represented to him. She was goodness, light, laughter, and a soft place to land. Why did she have to ruin that? Rationally, he understood her individual reasons, but it didn’t change the fact it had dealt a serious blow to the connection they’d established during his deployment. He couldn’t deny he enjoyed what she brought into his life, but the last few weeks had been the type of drama that he didn’t need. Only now that she was here—in his house—he wasn’t sure how to evade it. He also had no clue what her plans were. He hadn’t put a return date on her ticket when he bought it, because he knew that flexibility made travel easier. That was coming back to bite him in the ass now. The only thing he had to go on was the fact that she hadn’t brought a lot with her. So she either packed lightly, or this was to be a short stay. For his peace of mind, he had to hope it was the latter option.
Trouble’s head jerked up from where he was sitting at Gabe’s feet a split second before she came into view. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but she managed to surprise him again. The outfit she was wearing was one he’d seen when they talked near her bedtime. Even though the SpongeBob lounge pants and matching top were far from formfitting, they still managed to be sexy on her. As were the fuzzy blue socks that Trouble was currently inspecting in fascination. She gave Gabe a questioning look, and he nodded to let her know it was safe to pet his dog. She extended a hand, letting him sniff it. As usual, he took it one step further and licked it. She didn’t appear to mind, though, because she giggled as she squatted down to his level. “Hey, Trouble, aren’t you a beauty.” Trouble cocked his head to the side, as if spellbound by their visitor. You and me both, buddy. She trailed her fingertips lightly over the bridge of his nose. Even though his dog had never been anything but friendly to everyone he met, Gabe still kept an eye on them as he poured the milk he’d heated into a cup for her. Trouble didn’t seem alarmed by her touch in the least, quite the opposite. He rolled onto his back, presenting his belly for scratching. “Well, aren’t you a sweetheart,” she cooed. Great, I’m jealous of my dog. Trouble had largely ignored Melanie, as if sensing that the small amount of attention she gave him was all for Gabe’s benefit. But with Sara, he was rolling around on the floor with a blissful expression on his furry face. At least it’s not just me, Gabe thought wryly. The Randall boys seemingly had a thing for Southern women who smelled good. Okay, there was more to it than that, but damn, having her this close, with that scent filling the air, was doing a number on his head—the big one and the little one. Both were riveted by the beauty who invaded their space. But what was the proper protocol to follow here? Gabe knew how to run military operations with precision. Years of training had given him confidence in his job. He was damn good at it. But matters of the heart? Why did he feel so out of his depth? Without a clue how to navigate this . . . whatever this is.
Gabe forced himself not to stare at the outlines of her nipples, which the baggy top didn’t quite conceal. Down, boy. Sadly, that warning wasn’t for his dog. Clearing his throat, he said, “I figured it was too late for coffee, so it’s milk with some cinnamon in it. The spice makes it taste a little better than plain. My mom always made it for us when we were sick.”
She smiled up at him as if he were her hero. “That sounds amazing.” She gave Trouble one last pat before getting to her feet and moving over to the sink. After cleaning her hands, she took the cup from him. He watched her take a drink and wasn’t sure if the color that flooded her cheeks was from his attention or the warm liquid. “Mmm, wow, it tastes like a latte. This is really good.” Then she sent his blood pressure up several notches by licking her lips. I’m dying here. Help, someone . . . anyone. Dammit, he was thirty-seven. Far too old to experience this type of hormonal overload. At this point, if she bent over, he’d likely come in his pants. That alarming thought gave him a much-needed reality check. He wasn’t fool enough to continue testing his shaky resolve tonight, though. They needed to go to bed—alone. He’d feel better after some sleep. He’d be back in control tomorrow. And he was on field duty. Thank God. He was absurdly grateful at the thought of rolling out of bed in five hours.
He chanced a quick look in her direction and noticed that she looked wiped out as well. Trouble was sitting at her feet, gazing at her in utter adoration, while one of her hands rubbed his ear. “Hey, I don’t think I mentioned it, but I have to work this week. I’m supposed to be on leave, but I’m filling in for my boss. We’re doing some training, and one of us needs to be there.”
Was it his imagination or did she appear relieved? Could it be that she needed some space as well? Made sense. She had to be as overwhelmed as he was. “That’s okay, Gabe, I understand. I don’t expect you
to drop everything to entertain me. I realize that you have obligations and I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”
“Oh, I don’t think you’ll be completely on your own,” he smirked as he indicated the sappy expression on his dog’s face. “Pretty sure he’ll be following you around like a lovesick puppy.” At this rate, both of us will be.
“He’s so sweet. I haven’t had a dog since I was a kid, but that may need to change.”
Giving Trouble a pretend scowl, he said, “You might not have a choice. He’ll likely run after your plane when you leave.” Sara rinsed her cup, and he told her to leave it on the counter. “I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to crash. I’m sure I’ll be gone by the time you wake up. I have to be at the base before five. Just make yourself at home. I can’t take my phone into the field, but if you have any problems, leave me a message and I’ll check them as soon as I can. If there is any type of emergency, my contact information will be on the table. The switchboard will know how to reach me. Please don’t use it unless it’s really an—”
“I get it,” she interrupted. “I’m not one of those people who calls someone at work just for kicks. Trust me, if I do it, you’ll know it’s something dire.” He didn’t think she’d appreciate him sharing the fact that Melanie had done it twice. Once to ask what he wanted for dinner, and another time to tell him she was going out with friends. Neither of which he needed to be pulled out of a meeting to hear. A fact that he made clear after the second instance.
“Good deal. Let me show you to the guest room. The bathroom you used is right across the hall so feel free to make it your own. I have an en suite, so I rarely ever use that one.”
