by Kim Gamble
‘An old woman came slowly to the door. “Tashi! Come in, what a lovely surprise. I wasn’t expecting you today.”
‘“Well, this isn’t exactly a visit,” said Tashi. “It’s like this,” and he told her about the schoolhouse and the demons and the race. “So,” he finished, “I was wondering if you could lead me back to the village, Granny White Eyes.”
“Of course I can,” she laughed. “Mist or no mist, it makes no difference to me. I know every twist and turn in the path as well as my own kitchen. Come on.”
‘Tashi held on tight to her coat and they set off at a brisk pace through the blinding mist. Just before they reached the village, the fog cleared and Tashi stopped.
‘“I can see now. Granny White Eyes, would you like to run like the wind with me on my magic shoes?”
‘Her face creased into a wide smile. “Tashi, I would.”
‘Tashi knelt down and she climbed onto his shoulders. Granny screamed with delight as they sped over the ground.
‘“Oh Tashi, I never thought I would fly through the air like this. It’s wonderful.”
‘And didn’t the village cheer as they zipped into the square? The people crowded around to hear what happened, nudging each other, trying to get close to Tashi. All except the Baron, of course. He went home.
‘A bedraggled pair of demons finally found their way back to the village. They cursed and spat and “dillblotted” everywhere, but by late afternoon they had unloaded a cartful of bricks and tiles in the village square.
‘And that is why the new schoolhouse has Tashi’s name over the door, and why sometimes, on cold Monday mornings, (especially when there’s a spelling test) his friend Ah Chu mutters, “What a clever Tashi!”’
Mum sighed happily, then jumped as if she’d been shot.
BOOF! BANG! BOOM! went the drums.
‘You were a bit late weren’t you, Primrose?’ said Mum crossly.
‘A little,’ admitted Primrose. ‘I got caught up in the story and forgot.’
‘Well, I haven’t forgotten about that stage floor at your school, Jack,’ said Dad, shaking his head. ‘Has Tashi spotted any helpful demons in this suburb?’
‘Not yet,’ said Jack. ‘But he’s keeping his eye out.’
Jack hung up his bag in the hatroom and raced into class. ‘Sorry I’m late but —’
‘You were kidnapped by bandits,’ said Mrs Hall.
‘Strangled by mummies!’ called out Angus Figment.
‘Held up by Uncle Joe,’ sighed Jack.
Mrs Hall’s eyes lit up. ‘Uncle Joe? The brave traveller with many tales to tell of secret jungles and famous fishing spots around the world?’
‘Yes,’ said Jack. ‘He’s just come back from the Limpopo River in Africa.’
‘Ooh!’ Mrs Hall bounced on her seat with excitement. ‘I’ve only ever read about Africa. How I would like to go there! Well, class, today we will have a chance to be explorers ourselves. We’re going to choose a pen friend – someone who lives far away. You will write telling them about your life and they’ll write back about theirs. Now let’s look at this marvellous world of ours and think where we would most like to explore.’
Jack put up his hand. ‘Can we choose our own person to write to?’
‘Well, yes. And would this be someone your Uncle Joe has met?’
‘No.’
Mrs Hall waited. She waggled her eyebrows wildly at Jack. But Jack said nothing more.
At morning tea, Jack sat down next to Tashi. ‘I’d like to write to someone from your village. I bet your grandfather has seen a lot in his time.’
‘Yes, but his English is tricky.’
‘I just want to ask him one question: which one of your adventures he thinks is the scariest.’
‘Hmm,’ said Tashi, unwrapping his rice cake.
‘Do you think it would be the same one you’d pick?’
‘No. The one I’d pick stays in a small dark corner of my mind. I try not to think of it, but a certain monster of a man will always haunt me.’
Jack was silent for a moment. ‘Is this the man you started to tell me about in the lift? Bluebeard?’
Tashi nodded. ‘He was so full of venom, he could kill a snake.’
‘Gosh,’ said Jack. ‘What was so bad about him?’
‘Well, it all began with the castle on the hill,’ said Tashi. He took a deep breath. ‘The castle had stood empty for many years. It had twenty-three bedrooms, upstairs and downstairs, and they were dark and dusty with cobwebs. But one day Second Aunt called to tell us that she had just met the new owner. He was a wealthy merchant, she said, tall and handsome, with hair as blue-black as a raven’s wing.’
‘Bluebeard!’
Tashi shuddered. ‘The colour of his beard gave him his name. After this story is told, Jack, let’s not talk about him again. I am only telling you because you are my best friend.’
Jack nodded gravely.
‘Well, at first we were excited about the new owner of the castle – you know, a mysterious stranger from outside the village – and we couldn’t wait to see him for ourselves. We were even more excited when Lotus Blossom burst in with news.
‘“Guess what!” she yelled. “You’ll never guess, no you won’t in a million moons—”
‘Grandma told her it was rude to interrupt people’s dinner, and that if she didn’t watch out she’d give her a dose of witch’s warts to improve her manners. But then I saw that look in Grandma’s eye.
‘“Well, now that you’re here,” she said, “you’d better tell us.”
‘“It’s about the handsome stranger,” crowed Lotus Blossom. “I know something you don’t know!” and she danced around the table.
‘Oh, Jack, that girl might be my cousin but sometimes she’s more annoying than a wasp in summer!’
‘I know what you mean,’ nodded Jack. ‘I wish I’d had a dose of witch’s warts for Uncle Joe this morning.’
‘Well, finally Lotus Blossom told us the news. The wealthy new owner had asked her Elder Sister Ho Hum to marry him!
Their father was very pleased, because although Ho Hum was pretty she was such a languid sleepy sort of girl he’d been worried she would never do anything with her life but sit in her comfortable chair and doze.
‘Everyone was busy in the next few weeks, helping to clean up and decorate the castle. We had big parties to welcome the stranger. All the villagers said how well Ho Hum had done to find such a husband – everyone except me, that is. On the day I met Bluebeard I saw something that showed me a glimpse of his evil heart.’
‘What?’
‘Well, it was like this. At one of the parties I noticed Granny White Eyes asking for a cup of water.’
‘Oh, I remember her,’ said Jack. ‘She’s the old blind lady who helped you beat the demons.’
‘Yes, and I saw Bluebeard fill a cup from the dog’s water bowl to give to her! He had a nasty smile. I dashed over and, pretending to be clumsy, knocked it out of her hand. I gave her fresh water, but my heart was heavy.
‘It was even heavier the next day when I visited Not Yet at his shop. He was trembling. “Oh, Tashi,” he moaned, “that monster Bluebeard was here this morning to collect the shoes he’d left for me to mend. Just because I said they weren’t quite ready, he threatened to—” Not Yet’s face crumpled. “Tashi, if anything happens to me, I want you to have my hammer with the ebony handle.” Not Yet wouldn’t say anymore. He just bundled me out and locked his door and windows.
‘I hurried off to tell Ho Hum what had happened. But she didn’t believe me.
‘“You’ve got it wrong, Tashi,” she said. “Anyway, everyone gets angry with Not Yet when their shoes aren’t ready.”
‘The next day Ho Hum and Lotus Blossom came to take me on a trip up to the castle. Bluebeard was away on some business in the city and he’d given the castle keys to his bride so she could make sure that the new bed had arrived.
‘While Ho Hum had a little rest, Lotus Blossom and I
explored the gardens, ran up and down the stairs and shouted along the corridors. We came back for Ho Hum, and looked into each of the twenty-three rooms until we arrived at the tower at the top of the castle. The door was locked.
‘“We can’t go into that room,” said Ho Hum. “Not ever.”
‘“Why not?” asked Lotus Blossom. “What can be in there? Don’t you want to know?” She knelt down to look through the keyhole. “I can’t see anything; it’s blocked. Oh please, Ho Hum, let’s have one little peek inside.”
‘I think Ho Hum had been just waiting for someone to persuade her. She had the right key ready in her hand! When she opened the door, we all gasped. There were hundreds of wooden chests stacked with treasure, cloths of gold and peacock fans.
‘“Look,” cried Lotus Blossom, “over there! That’s the cabinet of jade figures that was stolen from the Baron last week. Ho Hum, it seems that you are marrying a robber!”
‘At that very moment I heard faint cries coming from behind some carved screens. Lotus Blossom and I pushed them aside and stood frozen with horror.
‘Five young women were hanging by their wrists, tied to iron rings set in the wall behind them!
‘My heart started racing and a chill like iced water spread down my back. Not Yet was right – only a monster would do such a thing. Quickly we went to the girls and gently tried to undo their straps. Their faces and arms were white as ghosts, and when the cruel leather straps came off the girls cried in agony.
‘They knelt on the floor and slowly told us their stories. One by one they had married Bluebeard, only to find they displeased him in some way.
‘“My mistake was to sing while I cleaned the house,” sobbed the first girl. “Bluebeard said singing was for birds, and birds should be in cages.”
‘“I served his tea too hot,” said the second girl. “My father always liked the way I made tea, but Bluebeard said it burned his mouth.”
‘“I talked to a neighbour—” sighed the third girl.
‘“I dropped a plate—” whispered the fourth.
‘“And I fed a stray cat,” said the fifth wife. “Bluebeard punished us all by locking us up. Then one night, when all the village was sleeping, he brought us to this castle. I don’t know how many days we have been here, but I am sure he means us to starve to death!”
‘“Let’s get out of here,” Ho Hum said urgently. But we heard a creak on the stairs. Bluebeard’s deep, harsh voice floated up to us. Quickly, Ho Hum ducked down behind the cabinet.
‘“We’ll come back for you,” I whispered to the girls, pulling the screen back in place. Lotus Blossom grabbed my hand and we slipped in behind the curtains just as Bluebeard strode into the room.
‘He was followed by two men with faces sharp as knives. “Take these boxes down to the cart – oh, that cabinet too—” he snapped. The men lifted the Baron’s cabinet and Ho Hum was left staring into the furious eyes of her husband-to-be.
‘His face grew dark as a storm. “I knew it!” he hissed. “You have disobeyed me in the one thing I asked of you, just like all the others. Take her away,” he growled to one of the men behind him.
‘Of course, wouldn’t you know it, Lotus Blossom couldn’t keep still on hearing that. She sprang out from behind the curtain, yelling at Bluebeard. “What do you mean, take her away?” she bellowed. “What are you going to do with Ho Hum? You can’t lock her up forever for disobeying you!”
‘Bluebeard looked at Lotus Blossom as if she was just a bug on his shoe. He took his time, considering whether to squash her or not. “Take them both below to the room with the barred windows,” he finally told the men, “then finish loading the cart.” And he marched off, out the door.
‘I waited as the men took the sisters and the boxes, and when they were gone I tiptoed out from behind the curtain. There was only one thing to do and luckily I had come prepared.
‘Wah, you should have seen Ho Hum jump as I stepped through the wall.
‘“Where did you come from, Tashi?” she gasped.
‘“I never did trust that Bluebeard, so I brought my magic shoes and these Ghost Cakes, in case,” I told her.
‘We explained to Ho Hum how easy it is to walk through walls once you’ve eaten a piece of Ghost Cake. But then we had to decide: which wall to go through now?
‘“It’s no use going through the door,” I whispered, “there’s sure to be a guard in the hallway.” I listened carefully at the wall of the next room. “We don’t want to walk into a roomful of Bluebeard’s robbers.” I took a deep breath. “I’ll go first.”
‘“No, we’ll go together,” said Lotus Blossom. So they swallowed their Ghost Cakes and we all stepped through the wall. INTO A ROOMFUL OF ROBBERS!
‘They were sitting around a table with their feet up and for a moment they were stuck to their seats in surprise. I seized a sword from the nearest robber, and I ran up the wall in my magic shoes. I skimmed across the ceiling, swishing the sword round and round my head. I moved so quickly I was just a blur of red coat and whistling sword, bouncing off the walls and floor and ceiling like a demon, shouting, “Out, out, OUT! Before you lose your EARS!” The stupefied robbers fought each other to be first out the door, and out of the castle.
‘“Well done, Tashi,” said Ho Hum. For once she looked quite lively. “That was … very interesting.”
‘“We still have to get out of the castle,” I panted, trying to get my breath. “And Blubeard won’t be so easy to frighten.”
‘We crept down the hall towards the stairs and we could see the open front door – so inviting! My foot was on the first step when I saw Bluebeard stride into the entry hall from the cellar. He was carrying two more iron rings. Quickly we shrank against the wall and crept back into the shadows.
‘A tall vase stood outside the room with the barred windows. I silently pointed to Lotus Blossom and Ho Hum to hide behind it and I squeezed in behind a suit of armour on the other side of the door.
‘Bluebeard’s face was set and his mouth was grim as he unlocked the door of the room. He stepped inside. We heard a sound of surprise as he looked around and found the sisters missing. Quick as a thunderclap I slammed the door shut. Ho Hum turned the key in the lock just as Bluebeard hurled himself against the door. Too late.
‘We raced like the wind down to the village square and straight over to the Magic Warning Bell. People came streaming out of their houses and shops, wanting to know what had happened. As soon as we told them about Bluebeard, they grabbed their shovels and pitchforks and carving knives and we all hurried back to the castle. The cart loaded with treasure was still outside where the robbers had left it. Lotus Blossom ran ahead, climbing the tower to free the poor wives, while I led the way to the room where Bluebeard was held.
‘He put up a tremendous fight when we burst in on him. I’ll never forget the look on his face. He bared his teeth like a wild dog, and he leaped on the nearest man, cursing and hurling punches. “Get out of my way, you miserable wretches,” he snarled. “My men will be here any moment to tear you apart!”
‘He thrashed his way through the villagers like an army until four men linked arms and surrounded him. It took another four to overpower him and three more to tie him up in his own chains.
‘As he was led away, Lotus Blossom took Ho Hum’s hand. “It’s a terrible thing, Ho Hum. Are you very upset?”
‘Ho Hum shivered, looking over at me. “Just as well you came with us today, Tashi. I wouldn’t have wanted to be wife number six.” She smiled sleepily at Lotus Blossom. “It wouldn’t have been … very restful.”’
Jack snorted. ‘That was one mean man,’ he said. ‘But then, the ghosts you met were monsters too. And that white tiger – he’d have swallowed you whole.’
Tashi stood up and threw his rubbish in the bin.
‘If you could choose,’ went on Jack, ‘would you rather be tied to a tree and eaten slowly by soldier ants or attacked by a lion?’
‘Lion,’ said Tashi.
> ‘Would you rather die of cold or hot?’
‘Cold,’ said Tashi after a moment. ‘Because you just fall asleep. Fifth Cousin almost went that way. They found him all curled up in the snow with a smile on his face. When they thawed him out he said it was just like dreaming.’
As they wandered back to the classroom, Jack and Tashi discussed what they would do if they ever met anybody as monsterish as Bluebeard again.
‘We could make a book of handy hints,’ said Jack. ‘Call it A Survival Guide to Monsters.’
‘Would there be a man as evil as Bluebeard in it?’ said Tashi.
‘You bet!’ said Jack. ‘But we just won’t mention his name.’
THE THREE TASKS
‘Hi Jack,’ called Mum from the laundry, ‘how was your day?’
‘Good,’ Jack called back, flicking off his shoes and opening the fridge.
‘Did you show Tashi the letter you got from his grandfather?’
‘Yesh,’ said Jack.
‘Jack? Are you eating that pie for tonight’s dinner?’ Mum marched into the kitchen and dumped the washing on the table.
‘You know the three tasks that Grandfather wrote about in his letter?’ began Jack.
‘Yes,’ nodded Mum. ‘He said to ask Tashi about them. So did you hear the whole story? And why did Grandfather ask if you had a dog?’
‘Well, Tashi said that after his family, Grandfather’s favourite creature in all the world was this dog called Pongo. And Grandfather’s favourite Tashi adventure was about Pongo.’
‘What, did the dog have to perform the three tasks?’ said Mum.
‘No,’ sighed Jack. ‘Do you want to hear the story? I’ve written most of it down in my Survival Guide.’
